Taylor Nolan And Derek Peth Broke Off Their Engagement

Breaking news hit Bachelor Nation today, as Taylor Nolan and Derek Peth announced that they’ve ended their engagement and are going their separate ways. Guys, help. I’m trying so hard not to make a “trouble in paradise” joke right now, but how can I not? After meeting last season on Bachelor In Paradise, Taylor and Derek were basically inseparable, and he proposed to her at the end of the season. Unsurprisingly, getting engaged mere weeks after meeting on a reality show is not the formula for a lasting relationship. I am shocked?

They announced the split in a joint statement to E! News:

“It is with much sadness that we have decided to end our engagement. We put everything we could into our relationship and are heartbroken to go forward separately, but we know this is the best decision for the both of us. We will still be present in each other’s lives with support, admiration and respect for each other.”

This statement really tells us nothing, which is disappointing but I also respect that they’re keeping the drama private. @Ronnie from Jersey Shore, take some notes. No matter how you felt about Taylor and Derek together, the split really isn’t all that surprising. As previously mentioned, they got engaged weeks after meeting on a reality show, and also neither of them had posted about the other in almost a month. This relationship probably just ran its course, and they got engaged way too soon.

The one where…

A post shared by Taylor Nolan (@taymocha) on

And with that Instagram, I relive the hazy memories of Taylor Nolan and Derek Peth at the Betches Meme Gala. Good times, good times. Going through a breakup is always hard, but I have a feeling that both of them will be okay. Taylor is still only 24, so she has plenty of time to get back out there and live her life. Derek is 30, so like, it’s far from over for him too. Actually, maybe it’s not too late to get one or both of them on the upcoming season of Bachelor in Paradise? I’m sure Chris Harrison is making some phone calls as we speak.

Best of luck to Taylor and Derek in whatever they do next, but I just have one question. Who gets the $50,000 Neil Lane ring? Can I have it?

Images: Getty Images; taymocha / Instagram

You Probably Forgot These ‘Bachelor in Paradise’ Couples Are Still Together

With The Bachelorette starting soon, featuring American’s Minnesoooootan sweetheart, Becca K., I am predicting it will be super fucking dull. Which is actually a compliment to Becca, because it means she’s a very nice, normal girl who is unlikely to have a mental breakdown on national television. And let’s be real, if she was going to freak the fuck out, it probably would have been during the bullshit that was her un-proposal. So unless they are able to find the male Corinne to shake things up, I’m assuming we’ll be watching a nice, normal girl from Minnesota date nice, normal men. Boring AF. The real excitement is going to be the next season of Bachelor in Paradise, which will start later this summer. We know a whole slew of Arie’s rejects will be there (stoner Bekah, Raven look-alike and BFF Tia, Bibiana, and Seinne, to name a few), but will these bitches find love? In order to answer that, we had to look to which Bachelor in Paradise couples are actually together less than a year later. Going off how many Bachelor couples are still together, it seems like getting a bunch of singles drunk on an island actually makes for more lasting relationships than just letting one guy choose between 35 Laurens. Who knew?? Anyway, here are the Bachelor in Paradise couples who defied all odds and still talk to each other.

1. Derek & Emotionally Intelligent Taylor

A post shared by Taylor Nolan (@taymocha) on

Full disclosure, Derek and Taylor were not one of my favorite Bachelor in Paradise couples, but they seem happy now so I guess I’m thrilled for them or whatever. I don’t think Taylor smiled the entire time in Paradise, and Derek is the poor man’s Jim Halpert. Sue me. Derek and Taylor got engaged on the After Paradise special last season, and judging by their Instagram posts, they are still together and take lots of free vacations. (Must be nice.) How much would you like to bet me that they’ll have a fake wedding on this season’s premiere of Paradise just like Carly and Evan, Lacy and Marcus, etc? (Sidenote: love that after their pretend wedding, Lacy stopped speaking to Marcus. Just iconic level ghosting.)

2. Raven & Adam

This relationship was confusing to me, mostly because Adam was the guy who brought his creepy AF little doll of himself on his season of The Bachelorette and again to Paradise. Shivers. Adam must finally be giving Raven orgasms, because they are shockingly still together. UsWeekly even reported a while back that they’re moving in together, so maybe we can add them to the docket of Paradise weddings. Even though initially I felt like Raven only chose Adam for more air time, now these two are one of the stronger Bachelor in Paradise couples. I don’t want to ask how the doll is involved in this.

3. Corinne & Demario (Sort Of)

A post shared by DeMario Jackson (@demariojackson_) on

Un-fucking-believably, Corinne and Demario spent Valentine’s Day together this year. I really did enjoy the After Paradise special where Corinne basically said, “I’m sorry I insinuated that you assaulted me, and I’m sorry for telling everyone about it. And I’m sorry for repeating it now.” The whole thing was crazy and unsettling and I will throw my TV out the window if we spend any time of the upcoming season discussing this bullshit again. Corinne and Demario don’t officially seem to be dating, but who knows? They did go to Disney together, and I feel like if you can remain friends with someone after a sexual misconduct scandal, anything is possible. What a great story for them to tell their kids one day.
Images: @taymocha, @demariojackson_ / Instagram; Giphy

One Of The ‘Bachelor In Paradise’ Couples Is Reportedly Engaged

Two of your least favorite people from The Bachelor franchise fell in love on Bachelor in Paradise and I hate to say it, but they’re actually significantly less terrible together than they are apart. Kind of like how if you multiply two negatives together they make a positive… right? Is that how it works? I haven’t done real math since I figured out you could flirt with teachers. Anyway, rumors are swirling that Taylor and Derek from Bachelor in Paradise end up engaged—er, are engaged currently.

A source told Us Magazine that Derek proposed to Taylor Wednesday night and that he proposed with a Neil Lane ring. Reality Steve reported that Derek proposed at the taping of the reunion. Then again, Reality Steve also said Bachelor in Paradise was definitely canceled for the season, so take this as you will.

Reality Steve

Side note, we really need to get Neil Lane to spill the beans on these pre-engagement chats he has with Bachelorette cast members. Like, what does the guy who’s totally getting dumped that day say? I think Neil Lane has a lot of great stories and lessons we all can learn from about false confidence.

Anyway, Derek is a commercial banker and Taylor is an emotional intelligence specialist/mental health counselor. That is the most boring combination of jobs anyone could think of, so it’ll probably work out between them. Like, what else do they have going for them? I mean, it’ll work out as long as Derek doesn’t say “fuck you” to Taylor under his breath ever again.

As you saw on BiP this week, Taylor and Derek had a slight tiff when she was trying to tell him how she feels or something and he jokingly said “fuck you.” I think it was sort of joking, at least. Like, who knew Jim Halpert had such a sassy side? Anyway, it really wasn’t much of a fight because he apologized, like, immediately, in guy terms. The fight was way over before the rose ceremony and I guess that’s how they both knew they could make it in the real world, by getting over a smallish argument on a beach in Mexico.

Congrats to the happy couple, maybe? May your life together be filled with the musings of undergrad psychology majors and a lack of swear words!