UPDATED: Which Kardashian Had The Best Halloween Costume This Year?

There’s no better part of Halloween than getting the chance to judge everyone’s costume choices. Who’s going as a basic slutty cat and who will wildly offend everyone at the party? But of course, the most intriguing and expensive costumes come from celebs. So who better to judge than the Kardashians? Year after year, the Kardashians tend to go all out—especially Kim. At press time, Kim has not yet posted a picture of her Halloween costume, but we’re sure it’s going to be iconic. Some of her best past looks were Jasmine from Aladdin, a mermaid (but like, not in a basic way), and Poison Ivy, so we can’t wait to see what she’s going to do this year. But the other Kardashians posted their Halloween costumes, so we get to judge those. Who did it best? Here is our ranking of the Kardashian Halloween costumes.

1. Kylie And Stormi

Obviously, first place must go to the butterfly duo of Kylie and Stormi. If this isn’t mommy-daughter goals, IDK what is. Ky went full-out and DIYed had someone make her beautiful wings. Of course, her mini-me had to look just as ~fly~ with her own set of baby wings. In true Kylie fashion, the base of her outfit (a skin-tight bodysuit) is understated but still serving major MILF vibes. Points for attention to detail with Stormi’s hairclip, perfectly matching her attire and Kylie’s butterfly details on her shoes.

 

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my baby butterfly..

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2. Khloé And True

A very close second place goes to the Mama Koko and True! These two went for the matching bodysuit tiger look. Initially, we were disappointed by Khloé’s lack of creativity (a unicorn is basic, sorry), but she really one-upped herself. Khloé’s makeup is also fantastic and really makes her look like a YouTuber sexy tiger. But can someone please tell her The Lion King is about lions, not tigers. So like the circle of life lift doesn’t totally apply…cute pic either way though.

 

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Happy Halloween part 2 from Baby True ???????????? (I swear she loves dressing up!)

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3. Khloé And True

In third place, below themselves, are Khloé and True in their unicorn outfits. Just when you thought True couldn’t get more adorable, she literally became a stuffed animal. Her cheeks might be the most perfect things I have her seen. I just want to pinch them! Wait, who am I? Anywho… Mama Koko kept it cute with her matching onesie, but still managed to glam it up with some jewelry and a matching manicure. Also, a special shout-out to Chicago for making an appearance in her own unicorn headband.

 

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Happy Halloween!!!! It’s our first Halloween together!!!! She’s too cute to spook!! (Don’t judge me, I have more costumes to post lol) ????????

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 4. Kylie

Back on the list in third place is Kylie for her solo Barbie look. Although the costume on its own wouldn’t be that impressive, Kylie went for it and added in the whole f*cking box. You also KNOW she didn’t wear that sh*t out, so that was totally for the Insta. That’s what Halloween looks like when you’ve got 900 million followers, I guess? Points also go to her for the slightly ironic caption, because truly, her life in plastic really is fantastic.

 

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Life in Plastic, It’s Fantastic.. ????

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5. Saint

Not gonna lie, Saint’s costume was kind of lame, but he’s too cute to be in the last place. According to Kim’s caption, Saint is supposed to be a pumpkin, but like, maybe a Yeezy baby pumpkin? I’m all here for the minimalist Halloween looks, but I feel like Saint is for sure capable of producing a more extravagant look. Perhaps there’s more to come…we’ll be waiting!

 

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How cute is my little pumpkin ????

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6. Kendall

Our bottom of the list is, unfortunately, Kendall for her basic AF Austin Powers sex-doll costume. Usually, this would be fine and totes creative, but it looks like she bought it from Dolls Kill and put literally no money effort into her look at all. Listen Kenny, when your job is basically to post Instas, at least give us something with a little more wow. But I mean, if you want to dress up as Kendall as a fembot, you can go buy it on sale.

 

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should we shag now or shag later baby?

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Images: kendalljenner, kimkardashian, kyliejenner (2), khloekardashian / Instagram

Is Kylie Jenner Engaged? Her New Instagram Is Suspect

Well, that didn’t take long. Last week, we predicted that Kylie Jenner would return to being a thirst trap on Instagram by next month, and it only took five days. We might not have guessed the baby name correctly, but we know a thirst trap when we see one. Kylie basically hasn’t been able to post a picture below her collarbones in like six months, and you know she’s just dying to get into a Calvin Klein matching underwear set and pose in front of a mirror. Her latest Instagram has us wondering less about Kylie Jenner’s post-pregnancy workout routine, though, and more about is Kylie Jenner engaged? Honestly, it’s not the craziest conclusion one could draw.

Kylie’s first post-baby foray into thirst trapness is tame by Kylie’s standards, meaning that she’s fully clothed and none of said clothing is see-through. Look at her being a responsible mommy! She’s posing in the driver seat of her Bentley, dressed in a red Adidas tracksuit that perfectly matches the red leather interior of the car. At this point, Kylie probably buys cars to match her outfits instead of the other way around, because like same obviously. Kylie’s makeup is unnecessarily dramatic for whatever activity she’s doing (pretending to drive?), but her eyebrows look seriously so good and we’re very jealous. But we didn’t really come here to talk about her eyebrows or her tracksuit, now did we?

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What we’re really here to discuss is what may or may not be a ring on her left hand. Zoom in, frantically text your group chat, “Is Kylie Jenner engaged??”, do whatever you need to do. Yeah, it’s been less than two weeks since Kylie popped out a baby, but did Travis Scott also find time to pop the question?

So first of all, this isn’t the first time people have speculated that Kylie and Travis are engaged. Back when she dropped her 11-minute pregnancy video (is this eligible for an Oscar for best short film?), there was one shot where it looked like there was something sparkly on the ring finger, but it’s so hard to tell from a grainy video.

Kylie Jenner

As much as we want Kylie to take two fucking seconds and just live her life, maybe getting engaged isn’t so crazy once you and another person literally created a human life together. After all, Kylie is almost 21, and that’s obviously when I felt ready to settle down with a nice man. Jk I was still getting irresponsibly drunk and falling asleep in my clothes at least twice a week. Still am!

So is Kylie Jenner engaged? Whether she is or not, it’ll probably be fine. And if it’s not, at least she has like, billions of dollars lying around to fix her life. Why the fuck didn’t I start a lipstick line instead of going to college?

Images: @kyliejenner / Instagram; Giphy (2)

Why Did Kylie Jenner Name Her Baby Stormi? An Investigation

In the words of Ferris Bueller, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and take a Xanax every once in a while, you might literally explode.” Or something. 24 hours ago I was stalking Kylie Jenner’s Instagram like a psycho to figure out what she might name her baby, and then fucking Stormi happened. So yeah, I might not have predicted the name correctly, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to use those two psych classes I took in college and try to figure out what the fuck Kylie is thinking. And by that I mean more Instagram stalking, duh.

I’ll admit it, when Kylie announced the name on her Instagram yesterday, it caught me by surprise. First of all, the name fucking sucks, but I mostly didn’t expect her to announce it so quickly after casually being a hermit for her entire nine months of pregnancy. Kylie was obviously going through social media withdrawals while she was pregnant, so get ready for her to return to full thirst trap status by March at the latest,  but probably with a few more stretch marks this time. But today we’re here to talk about poor Stormi Webster, and why her mother did her so wrong.

stormi webster ????????

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First of all, we know Kylie didn’t choose this name at the last minute. Family members were reportedly buying customized gifts for the baby back in January, which means that Kylie really knew what she wanted. But how did she settle on such a fucking weird name?

An obvious meaning could be that Stormi represents all the controversy and scandal that Kylie and her family have dealt with over the years. Like, congrats to Kylie for making it through all the #stormi times, you go girl. I just threw up a little while typing that, but it would at least kind of make sense. Like, not enough sense to make it worth picking as the name for your first-born child, but whatever. Kylie’s not like, classically known for her good decisions.

A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on

Maybe Kylie is just really into current events right now, and has been inspired by the courage and big boobs of porn star-turned-Trump truther Stormy Daniels. It would be a little much for them to have the exact same name, but just add the stripper ‘i’ at the end, et voilà! One perfect baby name. Can you tell how much we love the name?

Thank you to Sapphires Las Vegas! I had SO much fun!!

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While we were obviously not victorious in predicting Kylie’s baby name, we have to give a shoutout to Breanne Durbin, who is apparently a legitimate psychic and predicted the name on Twitter on January 1. Breanne, please immediately go to a casino or something, because you have a true talent and we aspire to be like you.

I’m predicting it now, @KylieJenner and @trvisXX baby’s name will be Stormy RT if you agree #prediction

— Breanne Durbin (@BreanneDurbin) January 1, 2018

Congrats Breanne, you’re officially better than us. I swear to god, I’m going to start billing little Stormi Webster for my therapy sessions, because honestly this child has been my main source of stress over the past week.