Nothing is worse than being down to have sex but feeling uncomfortable taking off your clothes. Being confident in bed is a major turn-on, but the fact of life is unless you’re Lizzo, you probably aren’t feeling yourself at all times. Maybe you’re getting your period and feel super bloated. Or you have a pimple the size of Mount Everest on your forehead and the thought of getting down in missionary while your partner makes eye contact with it is a major mood killer. I get it. I’m all for that self-love crap, but it just doesn’t always cut it. Sex can be uncomfortable and embarrassing (as we know from these uber awkward celebrity sex stories), but there are tons of ways to help boost your confidence and make you more comfortable in bed. Besides, the more comfortable you are, the more relaxed you’ll be and the more fun you’ll both have (and likely, the better it will feel). But other than wearing sexy lingerie or dimming the lights, there are certain sex positions that make you feel confident. Because confidence is sexy.
Who says “Sex positions” can’t include solo ones? Hear me out. Being comfortable and confident in bed stems from being comfortable with yourself. Knowing what you like and how you like it is extremely sexy. So how else will you know what to tell your BF to do if you don’t explore yourself first?
Like I’ve said before and I’ll say again (sorry for being preachy), if you’re confident with yourself, you’ll exert more confidence. Duh. But to do this, focus on your favorite body part and put it on full display. So if you’re super confident in your rack, climb on top and let your partner get an unobstructed view. Personally, I’m not a huge fan of my boobs. They are large and heavy and bounce around. But hey, I guess that’s what my boyfriend likes about them. So cowgirl might not do it for me, but for you it could be one of those sex positions that make you feel confident. An added plus is that you’ll be in full control and guys find that super sexy.
Similar to the above, focus on your fav asset. If that’s your ass, then turn around and do it from behind. If 2016 on has taught me anything, it’s that people love butts—even just looking at them. But it’s 2019, we’re eating ass now, so you might want to kick it up a notch. If your hair is long enough to put it in a ponytail, do it. Your bae can pull on your hair as you arch your back. Not only will he see your whole behind, but the arched back creates a super sexy position that you’ll both love.
Sometimes doggy isn’t my thing. The penetration can be so deep that it genuinely hurts, but if I’m bloated it’s my favorite position since my stomach cannot be seen. This is why I love reverse cowgirl. My ass is on full display, my stomach is hidden, and I’m in full control. Win-win-win, am I right? It’s also not a super frequent position in our repertoire (although it should be) so when I suggest it, my boyfriend gets super excited. The reassurance that I’m doing something he loves is a major confidence booster.
Contrary to Coach Carr, do it in missionary. It may seem v boring, but trust me. Lying on your back and letting him have full control may sound lazy, but if you throw in some instructions and boss him around a little, it’ll quickly turn from a super passive to a super active position. He’ll have the reversal of the typical dominant and submissive roles that are associated with missionary. Knowing what you want and communicating that to your partner is super sexy. Being a boss makes anyone super confident in bed; that’s just a fact. If you haven’t tried it, I highly suggest.
Another spin on doggy is this baby. It’s essentially the same, but you brace yourself up against a sofa. What’s so sexy about this position? Getting down and dirty outside the bedroom can feel super deviant and hot, which are both major confidence boosters. Sometimes the bed can feel repetitive, so why not change things up? Just make sure your roommates aren’t home (if you have them) or the couch doesn’t shift too much. Who knows, maybe this will open up the door to having sex around your entire apartment.
If all else fails, ask your bae what they like. Not only is open communication key to good sex, but it also allows them to vocalize what they like and don’t like. So you know next time when you kiss their neck or whatever, you’ll get a good reaction from them and a little confidence boost for yourself.
Images: Kristina Petrick / Unsplash; Giphy (3)
“Netflix and Chill” has become such a popular concept for a reason. But to be honest with you all, my boyfriend and I don’t typically watch TV shows together. Of course, this is mostly because we always get distracted during them (if you know what I mean) and then have to make time to rewatch the episode later. But having shows to binge watch with your SO sounds like a nice thought. So for those of you out of the honeymoon phase (or who aren’t horn-dogs), here is a list of the best TV shows to binge watch with your SO. For those of you in long distance relationships, use Netflix Party, a chrome extension that allows you to watch these shows from wherever TF you two are.
1. ‘Haunting Of Hill House’
Okay, so I have no interest in watching this show, with bae or without, because I’m a wimp and can’t handle scary things. But for those of you who have the balls to watch this, good for you. I hear it’s bomb (but I still won’t watch it). A friend of mine said that he really likes the show but would only watch it when his boyfriend was over.
This show is my go-to. When I’m sad? Friends. When I’m happy? Friends. When I get home drunk from the bar? Friends. It’s also one of the best shows to have playing in the background when you’re banging. A bunch of my friends agree too, saying, “when I can put something on other than sports, Friends is my go-to.” The only problem is if you’re like me and can pretty much quote every episode, you start reciting lines. Much to my boyfriend’s annoyance, when Friends is on in the background, I whisper romantic things like “Could I BE any more turned on?” into his ear. Mood killer? Maybe. But a good laugh for
both of us me.
3. ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm’
Similar to Friends, this show is a great choice. The episodes are short half-hour episodes that are light-hearted and funny. My boyfriend introduced me to this show and at the beginning, just showed me his favorite clips, which turned into him showing me his favorite episodes and now I’m hooked. Curb to him is like Friends to me. Now that I have been watching it, I can make references to the show and he gets more excited than when I say I’m horny.
4. ‘Gossip Girl’
One of my friends got her boyfriend into Gossip Girl because of her obsession with the TV show. It may not seem like the “classic man’s show” (don’t even get me started with heteronormative gender roles) but it will hook anyone who watches it. According to IMDB, 25% of the people who rated the show were men. Women rated the show at a 7.8 point out of 10, whereas men rated the show a 6.7. So if anyone in the comments wants to argue that this isn’t a show for men, fight me.
5. ‘This is Us’
Apparently, all guys watch it with their girlfriends but won’t admit it to their friends. Granted, this is based on one of my friend’s opinions, but I’ll take it as fact. If you need your SO to get in touch with his
ugly crying face emotional side, fire this show up.
If you started watching this show before you and your boyfriend started dating, then it’s an easy one to watch together (and then talk about our recaps the next day). TBH this could go for any TV show but Riverdale is one of the best TV shows to binge watch with your significant other. Why? Because you know the storyline and characters from your childhood but take a murder mystery approach to it. V interesting, trust me.
Images: Giphy (3)
I never really got why people used nicknames for their SO. Like, we were all given names when we were born, are those not good enough? Regardless, there are some really bad couple names out there. I always thought names that related to food or being a child were the worst couple names one could call their SO, but boy was I wrong. After researching for this article, I found that there are some really weird af people out there who call their SOs some ridiculous names.
1. Vagitarian, Boobarella, Tits, Meat Blanket, Or Any Name Related To Their Nether Regions
IMO, any nickname that specifically references to yours or your partner’s nether regions is definitely at the top of the worst couple names EVER. Unless you are waiting until marriage (why…?), we know you f*ck, you don’t need to make it public (*cough* Pete and Ariana). Also, is your SO just their vagina or penis? Because if not, use a different nickname.
It’s been almost three years and I still don’t sh*t in front of my boyfriend—like hell I’d call him a name related to it. How is this remotely romantic? If you are into dirty Sanchez-ing, then this horrifying couple name is exclusively for your use.
3. Mommy or Daddy
I’m going to assume that the people who use these nicknames are not actually dating their parent because that would be, like, a crime, yes? If calling your SO “daddy” is your way of being submissive to him, then look into bondage.
4. The Ol’ Ball and Chain
We all know those couples who are the definition of this worst couple name. I prefer the term “whipped,” but to each their own. If you hear your boyfriend call your relationship this with his buddies, it’s a sign you should end the relationship pronto. Then go look for someone who is way less sexist.
Images: Alice Arinari / Unsplash; Giphy (2)
To paraphrase the esteemed Big Sean, betches don’t give a fuck. When our bosses tell us to spend less time reading recaps of Vanderpump Rules, we politely agree and move on to scrolling through Jax Taylor’s Instagram. When our besties beg us not to post a photo (“my eyes are crossed and I have six chins!” they say, as if we care) we filter that shit and post away because we look hot AF. When the human equivalent of gas station nachos becomes POTUS, we spend all weekend blacking out and ignoring current events. TBH, we were going to do this anyway, but you see my point.
Every once in a while, though, a fuck or two sneaks in and we get a little jealous. Even Beyoncé does it though, so it’s okay.
But according to science, that little flicker of jealousy (which may or may not leave you six years deep into your boyfriend’s ex’s Facebook at 3am) might be responsible for the betchiest of pastimes: shopping beyond our means.
In a study published in the Journal of Consumer Psychology, scientists did a bunch of experiments which are way too boring to lay out here. The takeaway is that people who were made to feel jealous of their romantic partners were more likely to buy eye-catching shit like gold lamps and brightly colored coats later. Basically, it’s the same logic you use whenever you start dressing like you’re performing at the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show whenever you catch someone standing too close to your SO (so like, within two feet).
Next time you’re whipping out your credit card for some coral lipstick you definitely don’t need, stop and consider whether you’re doing this because you actually want it, or because you’re being driven by the fires of a jealous rage. Then buy it anyway, because who gives a fuck?