Anyone who’s ever stayed in on a weekend night (so like, all of us) has experienced the FOMO that comes along with a night of being responsible aka too hungover from the previous night. You settle in for a night of Netflix, but first you gotta check your apps. Facebook is the same—just some of your vaguely prejudiced friends posting veiled statuses in support of Trump, nothing new to see there. You check Instagram and have a few chuckles at some memes. But then you make the cardinal mistake of checking Snapchat, and you come to the realization that everyone is out having fun without you. Your friends aren’t holding a funeral service for your absence. Your coworkers who said they were doing nothing this weekend are all out drinking without you. Those bitches. But never fear, because we’re exposing the reality of all those “fun” parties you see in our new Social Media Vs. Reality video series. That lit house party you see your roommate at? Yeah, that’s probably like, three people and an iPhone. The crazy club night your cousin’s posting about? Think of it this way: If it were really that fun, she wouldn’t be constantly taking breaks from dancing to capture, filter, and upload selfies every 10 minutes. I know, I’m a genius.
Anyway, here’s what that house party you saw on Snapchat was actually like IRL. (Spoiler alert: You didn’t miss anything.)
Snapchat filters have come a long way since the days of the rainbow barf, and at this point we all have our personal favorites that we use on the regs. We love Snapchat filters so much, that they’re basically the only thing keeping Snapchat afloat now that Insta stories got into the game. And much like perfumes, lipsticks, and literally every other customizable things on the planet, the filters you use most say a lot about you, which is why we’re here to let you know what all your followers are already thinking. Read on for what your favorite Snapchat filter says about you.
The Puppy: You’re Very Loyal
Because dogs are loyal, right? Wrong. Loving the puppy filter means you respect the things in life that don’t let you down, and looking like a cute animal next to your bestie is one of them. You can count on this filter to improve any situation because you’ve personally tested it out in all of them. Whether you’re sitting on the couch or full-on blackout out at the club, once you layer on some puppy ears you’re morally obligated to send that image to every contact in your phone.
The Pretty One: You’re Great At Gaming the System
Any betch that defaults to the pretty filter is both vain and highly resourceful, basically two of the best qualities to have. This filter instantly makes everyone look hotter, even if you’re not wearing makeup, which means you can be extremely lazy about your appearance and still send thirsty pics to your crush. If this one’s your favorite it means you’re not above using special effects on your face instead of getting ready which is basically the definition of winning at life.
The Flower Crown: We Get It, You Went To Coachella
Honestly, enough already. If you’re sporting the flower crown more than once every six months then you’ve made it abundantly clear that you’re a festival betch. Even though it gives you a facelift and lash extensions, you can easily overdo this filter so you may want to chill out for a bit and pretend to be a hippie elsewhere.
The Face Distorting Ones: You Give Zero Fucks
If you’re just sending these to friends that’s one thing, but if you’re proudly displaying your busted face for all to see then you’ve clearly given up on life in a very public way. On the bright side, your normal selfies probably look amaze in comparison.
The Sunglasses/ Partying Ones: You Stay In a Lot
No one uses the party filter while actually at a party, so if you’ve memorized the lyrics to those catchy songs by now then it might be time to leave the house. At the very least don’t send these out multiple Saturday nights in a row because that’s just depressing AF for everyone receiving them.
The Bunny: You’re Having A Life Crisis.
No offense, but if your favorite filter is the dancing bunny then you def want to rethink your choices. This is a one-and-done kind of Snapchat that’s best used for posting an embarrassing vid of someone else. If you’re repeatedly sending Snaps of you with a scary bunny face, or God forbid, Storying it, then you’re likely in the midst of a mental breakdown.
No Filter: You’re Really Brave, Or Really Old
If you prefer to never use a filter then you either have the strongest selfie game on the planet or just don’t understand how to use Snapchat. While we all enjoy sending pics with #nofilter, it’s not something we would choose to do all the time because it’s a) kind of boring and b) the pretty filter exists. Time to get with the CGI programming, betch.