13 Mother’s Day Gifts Under $100

When it comes to made up, unnecessary holidays, I will always be the first to say how stupid they are. Case in point: wtf is National Fruitcake Toss Day and why do we set January 3rd aside for it? As far as I’m concerned, January 3rd is a day of post-NYE rest. Mother’s Day, though, is not one of those holidays, and it is as legit as it is necessary. I applaud all mothers for all of the incredibly hard work that they do. I, for one, was a supreme brat from ages 12-23, so I am definitely going to spend May 10th bestowing upon my mother a thoughtful gift that says, “thank you for putting up with my bullsh*t for so long.”

Here’s the thing, though: my mom deserves like 25 Hermès scarves, the Tiffany diamond (you know, the one Lady Gaga wore to the Oscars) and a few other luxuries, but I just got laid off and can barely afford organic strawberries these days. Luckily, there are a few great Mother’s Day gift options for under $100 that say “You are a queen and you deserve the best, but, as you can see, I am poor rn.” Good enough, I guess.

Casetify Monogram Studio Case, $50

I’m sure some of you may think that no respectable woman would carry around anything that says “mom” on it, but this phone is not for regular moms; it’s for cool moms. Seriously, my mom is a classy broad with amazing style and I know for certain she’d f*cking love this leather case. It’s totally customizable, so if you’re not into pastels with navy accents, you can pick whatever color combo your mother would love most. Have fun spending the next four hours designing this bad boy!

Earl Grey Tea Tin, $8.95

Most mothers I know subsist on tea, and these super cute vintage-looking tins from Society Social make for a great gift. Each tea flavor comes in a different colored tin and contains 20 tea bags, so she’ll be set with her tea habit for a good while. Also, if you ask me, this is a literal steal.

Slip Pillowcase, $71

This silk pillowcase is a perfect example of something I’ve always wanted, but could never bring myself to actually buy. Luckily, I dropped enough super subtle hints to my roommate and she bought it for my birthday. Let me just say, it totally lived up to the hype. Here’s why your mom will also love it: it’s anti-aging. For starters, she won’t wake up with creases all over her face, but more importantly, the silk won’t absorb her serums, moisturizers and eye creams. It also protects her hair. Win-win!

Levain Bakery Cookie Assortment, from $27

If you’ve ever been to New York, you’ve been to Levain. They make the densest, richest cookies I’ve ever had, and I mean that in the best way. The sweet relief that comes with taking a bite of the classic chocolate chip walnut is what I imagine doing opioids must feel like. Seriously, they’re so f*cking good and can last for months in the freezer. I don’t know your mom, but I promise she will love them.

Local Eclectic Dainty Princess Birthstone Ring, $74

Local Eclectic is a female-founded and female-run online marketplace for emerging and independent jewelers to sell their gorgeous designs. I have gotten so much jewelry from this place that I’m embarrassed to admit how much of the money I don’t have has supported my jewelry addiction. Anyway, these birthstone rings are super delicate and can be layered, so getting a few for your mom based on the months you and your siblings were born is so cute. Or just get her one to remind her who her favorite is.

Serena & Lily Spa Robe, $79

This robe is currently on sale, so don’t wait to get it if you want to save serious $$. It’s made of Turkish cotton, which means it’s soft af. The inside is a super plush terry cloth and the exterior is a very on-trend waffle pattern. I am really tempted to get this for myself because I’m pretty sure that my current dark gray floor-length robe was inspired by the Grim Reaper’s from the Sims. Serena & Lily is a home brand beloved by many moms, so I’m sure any of them would appreciate this.

Jo Malone London Candle, $67

Let me just start by saying if you have principals and refuse to spend $67 on a candle, check out Voluspa for gorgeous candles at a less offensive price. Anyway, Jo Malone is known for her perfume and, as of late, her candles. I actually have this one on my nightstand and I get whiffs of it even when it’s not burning. The glass container has a really nice minimalist look and the candles all smell amazing, so you really can’t go wrong. The Wood Sage & Sea Salt scent is the most popular, and I love that not-so-subtle “bougie parfumée” flex on the bottom of the label.

Barr Hill Gin, $44

Guys, listen: for my first Mother’s Day, I would really appreciate a bottle of 90-proof liquor. In all seriousness, this is a great gift! Everyone loves a good cocktail—especially now that we will most likely still be staying at home on May 10th—and gin is a crowd-of-less-than-10-pleaser. Also, this bottle looks like something Julia Engel would have displayed on her bar cart because it’s so charming and whimsical-looking.

Moon & Jai Love Ritual Kit, $49

In the Pursuit is kind of like Local Eclectic, but for literally everything, not just jewelry. If your mom is into crystals, burning sage, and palo santo, she will lose her mind at this kit. It contains a rose quartz crystal, clear quartz point, sage wand, beautiful matches and a bunch of other sh*t that will definitely clear the bad energy from her house.

Escape By Gray Malin, $28.95

Gray Malin is a photographer whose pictures are reminiscent of Slim Aarons, but way more affordable. I got this book for myself at a book-signing and, after flipping through it, bought myself one of his photos. His work, mostly aerial photos of beautiful beaches around the world, is really beautiful and the book is a great way to see it all without having to drop thousands on a big-ass picture your mom has no wall space for.

UGG Fuzzette Slide Sandals, $90

Everyone loves slippers, and if anyone tells you otherwise, they’re a liar. UGG may not be as cool as it was in 2006, but their slippers are still unparalleled. If your mom is aching for a canary yellow slide that she can wear around the house, she’ll love these. They also come in black, though.

Kin Sora Multipurpose Towel, $68

If your mom loves yoga as much as she loves the environment, this towel is the perfect gift for her. I know what you’re thinking, “a towel?” but this is no ordinary towel. In fact, it’s made from recycled fabric and is non-skid, so your mom can use it as a yoga mat. I mean, who doesn’t love a good multi-purpose product, right?

PlantShed Adore You, $34

If your mom lives in the tri-state area, don’t even think about getting her flowers unless they’re from PlantShed. If Rufus Humphrey was a botanist instead of an art-junkie, he’d have opened PlantShed (it’s half charming flower shop and half coffee shop). They teach you how to care for your new plant so that your mom couldn’t kill it if she tried.

Images: Brigitte Tohm / Unsplash; Bloomingdale’s; Gray Malin; In The Pursuit Studio; Caskers; Jo Malone; Serena & Lily; gopjn.com; Levain; Slip; Society Social; Casetify; Kin; PlantShed

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10 Last-Minute Gifts You Can Get On Amazon

If being what my grandmother calls a “youth” has taught me one thing, it’s that delayed gratification ain’t worth sh*t. Call me crazy, but if there is something wrong with getting what I just decided I wanted with free two-day shipping, then I don’t want to be right! Obviously, Amazon is the holy grail of online shopping 365 days a year, but the one time it really comes in handy is during the holidays.

A modern nightmare: I have a dinner date with a friend in a few days and last night, she texted to confirm and then she sent a follow-up text, “You’re going to love your gift!” My first thought was “Yes! I love presents!” and my second thought was “F*ck, now I have to get this bitch a present.” Even though a small part of me hates spending money on people who aren’t myself, I was pretty happy to order her gift and have it wrapped and ready for her three days later for our dinner-turned-gift-exchange. 

If you, too, hate waiting, here are ten of our favorite gifts to shop on Amazon. If you order in the next two days, you can get free delivery by 12/24. 

1. Amazon Fire Stick, $24.99

One thing my 90-year-old grandmother and I have in common is that neither of us understands technology, like, at all. Take this Fire Stick, for example, which, after using it this weekend, seems like it was designed for idiots people like me. It’s a skinny remote control and a USB that plugs into the side of your TV. It works exactly like an HDMI cord, except no one will trip over it and you don’t have to have your laptop open and simultaneously playing whatever you’re trying to watch on your TV. 

2. Slip Queen Silk Pillowcase, $85

I am the type of person who gets the generic version of literally everything because I don’t want to spend money on the name brand stuff, but this Slip pillowcase is my one exception because it’s that good. First of all, it’s soft af. Secondly, unlike cotton, silk doesn’t absorb your expensive nighttime skin care. Lastly, it always feels cool to the touch, which, if you run hot (hi), is a blessing. 

3. Aquis Microfiber Towel, $20.99

A few weeks ago, a friend was telling me about this amazing towel for your hair and, whaddya know, I was seeing its sponsored posts on my Instagram feed later that day. As creeped out as I am by technology that has no respect for boundaries, I bought and used this Aquis towel. Let me just say, it’s not just a towel. There’s something about microfiber that makes it insanely absorbent without tugging your scalp. I leave this bad boy in for like, 15 minutes while I put on my makeup and when I take it off, my hair is basically dry. 

4. KODAK Luma Pocket Projector, $199.99

If your bedroom is like mine, it’s white and boring af. This little guy changes that! You can watch movies, stalk your office crush, and mindlessly scroll Instagram from the comfort of your own bed, which may sound like what you usually do, but this is different because it’s projected on your ceiling. For reference, the iPhone 11’s screen is six inches long and two inches wide. The choice is yours. 

5. WOLF Caroline Travel Case, $60.79

This is one of those things I really want but would never actually spend $60 on because I’m cheap. Even though I don’t really go anywhere, I go to my hometown for nearly every holiday, which is enough travel to warrant a travel case for all of my jewels (one ring, my watch and a few pairs of earrings). This is the kind of gift everyone would appreciate. 

6. Pasta Grannies, $26.99

I do not fancy myself a chef, but I do f*cking live for pasta, and I love it even more when I don’t have to pay New York prices for it. Luckily, none of the recipes in this cookbook are Top Chef-level complicated, so even if your Secret Santa uses her oven to store her sweaters, she’ll be able to nail a few of these recipes. 

7. Skylety Champagne Flutes, $12.99

One thing I love is the amount of cups in the world. There is literally a designated cup for every type of beverage and I’m all for it. Even though I stan a beer chalice, I love a good Champagne flute. These ones are amazing because they’re insulated, and because nothing is less appetizing than flat, warm Champagne, these are good to have on-hand. 

8. Navawo Fingerless Gloves, $13.99

While fingerless gloves do seem completely useless in theory, gloves with fingers are horrible. Contrary to popular belief, you’ll be pretty warm in fingerless gloves and you’ll be able to use your phone’s touchscreen while avoiding your coworkers on the subway. 

9. Image Skincare Vital C Hydrating Facial Cleanser, $30

Not only does this cleanser smell amazing, it makes your skin look and feel like you just got a hydration. Seriously, use this day and night for a week and you will legit notice a difference. It doesn’t leave your skin feeling tight or dry, but rather, supple and moisturized. 

10. Rifle Paper Co. 2020 Planner

Most of my friends LOL at the fact that I still use planners even though I graduated from college four years ago, but I don’t give a sh*t because I love them. This one is especially nice because it’s not aggressively decorated or enormous, but it’s big enough that you can actually fit all your appointments and sh*t in it. Get this for your friend who double books and everyone else in your group will thank you.

Images: Kira Auf der Heide / Unsplash; Amazon (10)
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