Did Harry & Meghan Name Their Baby After A ‘Riverdale’ Character?

When news broke on Monday that Meghan Markle had given birth to her first child with Prince Harry, everyone was obviously excited. Details were scarce, but we were all eager to know more about the baby, even if we had already analyzed his birth chart. Luckily, the Royal family isn’t as secretive about their babies as they are about their cheating rumors, so today we got a first look Harry and Meghan’s new baby, and now we finally know his name: Archibald “Archie” Harrison Mountbatten-Windsor. With a name like that, this is already the oldest baby that’s ever been born.

Archibald was a pretty unexpected name choice, as the top predictions were all more typical British royal names: Alexander, James, Philip, and Arthur. All boring AF. In the end, they went with Archibald, which is a name that was most popular in the 1800s. Sure, why not. In their official announcement on Instagram, they just called him Archie, so basically I’m always going to think about Riverdale when I hear anything about this kid. Sorry, that’s just how my brain works. Honestly, if he grows up to look anything like KJ Apa, Harry and Meghan are going to have a major troublemaker on their hands. The official Archie Comics Twitter account wasted no time getting in on the action:

Bury me here, I’m dead. But now that I’m done thinking about KJ Apa’s abs (until later), let’s get back to the matter at hand—the Sussex Royal Instagram.

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The Duke and Duchess of Sussex are pleased to announce they have named their first born child: Archie Harrison Mountbatten-Windsor This afternoon Their Royal Highnesses introduced Her Majesty The Queen to her eighth great-grandchild at Windsor Castle. The Duke of Edinburgh and The Duchess’ mother were also present for this special occasion. Photo credit: Chris Allerton ©️SussexRoyal

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In the photo from today, we see Meghan introducing the baby to Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip for the first time, and it’s the happiest the Queen has looked in years. It’s pretty insane that she now has eight great-grandchildren, considering the fact that my mom will be lucky to get one grandkid out of me. Everyone looks great in the photo, especially Meghan Markle. It’s honestly rude how good she looks just two days after giving birth, but I’m trying to work on my jealousy issues.

It’s being reported that the Harry and Meghan have decided not to use a courtesy title for Archie, AKA he won’t be the Earl of Dumbarton, as had previously been reported. Basically, that just means that they don’t really care about their baby being ~royal~. Like, obviously he’ll still be royal AF, and lead a very comfortable life, but he’s not technically a Prince or anything. Sad for him! Instead, he’ll just be referred to as “Master Archie,” which still sounds fancy as f*ck.

This was fun, but now I’ve got to go to therapy to unpack why I’m jealous of a two-day old baby. Later!

Images: Getty Images; @sussexroyal / Instagram

What The Royal Baby’s Birth Chart Predicts About His Personality

On Monday, May 6 at 5:26 a.m. Meghan Markle and Prince Harry, the Duchess and Duke of Sussex, welcomed a baby boy—jolting our collective ovaries and filling our Instagram feeds with congratulatory posts. The royal baby is seventh in line for the throne, and the eighth great-grandchild for Queen Elizabeth. And while most are busy waiting for a photo and a name reveal, thanks to astrology and the birth time, we’re already able to take a deeper look into the royal baby’s personality and what his relationships with his parents might be like.

Bougie Baby

The royal baby, like Queen Elizabeth, is a Taurus, a sign that’s noted for appreciating the finer things in life. Tauruses are stubborn, strong leaders, making this kid a natural fit for royalty. The royal baby is also a Taurus rising, which will give him a commanding personality and ability to influence. Sharing a sun and rising sign, both in Taurus, will strengthen the royal baby’s ability and desire to operate from a position of power. Early on in his life, this can manifest as boastful or arrogant, but as he matures, he will be able to lead with grace and leave a strong impression on others.

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We are pleased to announce that Their Royal Highnesses The Duke and Duchess of Sussex welcomed their firstborn child in the early morning on May 6th, 2019. Their Royal Highnesses’ son weighs 7lbs. 3oz. The Duchess and baby are both healthy and well, and the couple thank members of the public for their shared excitement and support during this very special time in their lives. More details will be shared in the forthcoming days.

A post shared by The Duke and Duchess of Sussex (@sussexroyal) on

When he was born the moon was in Gemini, which will only add to his charm and intellect. He’ll be able to make emotionally controlled decisions and be an effective communicator. There can be some anxiety with this placement of the moon—there is a tiresome restlessness and curiosity that could cause him to overthink or talk a lot. Mars, the action planet that drives our ego and desires, clashed with Jupiter, the planet of abundance, in the sky at the time of the royal baby’s birth. This points to a competitive spirit, possible temper (tantrum) issues, but overall an overwhelming passion for life. Venus, the planet that rules love and affection, made a hard connection with Saturn, the planet of restriction, at the time of this birth. This particular sync up can mean a lack of self-confidence that can be ultimately damaging to personal, romantic relationships. Feelings of rejection and loneliness might haunt the royal baby and keep him playing the field longer than necessary instead of settling down. He’ll have to work on self-love before he can enter a committed, sustainable relationship.

Mother’s Nature

So, he’s got the spirit of a royal and the foundational skills to lead, but what’s life going to be like growing up with mom and dad? Meghan is a fiery Leo and Baby Sussex is a grounded Taurus. By nature, the personalities of these two sun signs can easily clash. In astrology, they form a tense aspect called a square, which can bring energy to the relationship, but also pose a handful of challenges. The basic personality needs of each sign are not compatible, which can be draining and cause ego conflicts. It adds an element of frustration and competition to the way the pair interacts.

But Meghan’s affectionate Venus sign is in Virgo, a fellow earth sign that’s incredibly compatible for Taureans. The way she loves and gives affection links up harmoniously with the royal baby’s Taurus sun and rising sign, adding levity and unconditional love to the relationship. Meghan and her baby also have moon signs in intellectual air signs—Meghan’s in Libra and Baby Sussex’s in Gemini. The way they process emotions is very similar, which will create a comfortable and loving home environment.

The #royalbaby is here! Congratulations, Meghan Markle and Prince Harry. The baby is 7th in line for the throne, which is crazy, because right now I’m 7th in line for the key-making kiosk at my grocery store. @RoyalFamily

— Ellen DeGeneres (@TheEllenShow) May 6, 2019

Difficult Dad

Prince Harry and the baby share an astrological aspect that is one of the most highly-touted among astrologers: a sun-moon conjunction, meaning the baby’s sun sign (Taurus) is the same sign as Harry’s moon sign (Taurus). The sun represents our outer self, while the moon represents our inner self. When two people share this aspect they form a deep bond, and share a mutual, effortless understanding of the other’s nature. There is an unrivaled trust in one another’s personality and belief system.

Despite this powerful connection, that’s not to say Harry is destined to be the favorite parent—there are still some stressful planetary connections between the pair. Harry’s Saturn, planet of restriction and structure, forms a stressful connection to Baby Sussex’s Venus, the planet of love. This can result in Harry being overly critical of the royal baby’s actions, or overly demanding of him in general. Baby Sussex in turn might view his dad as unsympathetic over time. Harry’s Saturn also forms a tense aspect to the royal baby’s Sun, his basic sense of self. Baby Sussex might feel as if he can’t be his true self when he’s with Harry—like he needs to hide or suppress part of his personality. This also feeds the overly critical nature of Harry’s Saturn, and might leave the royal baby feeling overly sensitive.

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This afternoon, His Royal Highness The Duke of Sussex shared the news of the arrival of his and the Duchess’ first born child. Their son was born early morning on the 6th of May, 2019 and weighs 7lbs and 3oz. Their Royal Highnesses thank you for your support and kindness during this exceptionally joyful time in their lives as they welcome their baby boy.

A post shared by The Duke and Duchess of Sussex (@sussexroyal) on

That being said, we’ve certainly got time to see how Baby Sussex’s personality develops over time. All that’s certain for now is: He’ll be charming af and a natural-born influencer, most likely on the political (or social media) scene. Now back to waiting on that name reveal.

Images: Shutterstock; @sussexroyal / Instagram (2); @TheEllenShow / Twitter

Meghan Markle Had Her Baby

After months of waiting, the newest member of the Royal family is finally here. Meghan Markle, Duchess of Sussex, gave birth to a baby boy early this morning, May 6th. While we were all commuting to work this morning, reports spread that Meghan Markle was in labor, but luckily we didn’t have to wait very long. At around 9:30am, they announced the baby’s arrival with a post on the official Sussex Royal Instagram account, and added that the little prince weighs 7 lbs, 3 oz. Actually, they specifically said that “Their Royal Highnesses’ son weighs 7lbs. 3oz.” Nice and pretentious, just the way I like it.

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We are pleased to announce that Their Royal Highnesses The Duke and Duchess of Sussex welcomed their firstborn child in the early morning on May 6th, 2019. Their Royal Highnesses’ son weighs 7lbs. 3oz. The Duchess and baby are both healthy and well, and the couple thank members of the public for their shared excitement and support during this very special time in their lives. More details will be shared in the forthcoming days.

A post shared by The Duke and Duchess of Sussex (@sussexroyal) on

Unlike Will and Kate’s first baby, Meghan Markle Jr. (what I’m going to call the baby until we find out the name) will probably never be King, but he’s still in the line of succession. He’s seventh in line to the throne, which is significant because there could technically be a black King of England. Amazing. A lot of sh*t would have to go down in order for this to happen, but still, Meghan Markle has really changed the future of the Royal family.

Reports had long suggested that Meghan Markle Jr. would arrive at the very end of April or early May, and things looked even more sure when Prince Harry’s scheduled visit to the Netherlands this week was shortened to a single-day engagement. He will be in The Hague on May 9th to kick off the one-year countdown to the 2020 Invictus Games, a sporting event which is one of his main projects.

The arrival of Meghan Markle Jr. is probably a huge relief for everyone in the royal family, because the past few weeks have been a nightmare, with rumors that Prince William cheated on Kate Middleton. According to sources, these cheating issues are at the root of the reported disputes between Will and Harry, who used to be super close. Hopefully, this new baby will help the family mend some of their issues, or else Queen Elizabeth might have to put Will and Harry in timeout until they can play nice with each other.

Images: Shutterstock; @sussexroyal / Instagram

There’s A New Royal Baby On the Way, And Here Are Our Name Ideas

Just when we thought Prince William and Kate Middleton literally couldn’t get any more perfect, on Monday they announced that they’re expecting another child together. This is basically the best news in the world, because their last two kids are the almost cute enough to thaw our cold, dead hearts.

They technically only made the announcement now because Kate is having the same severe morning sickness as her last two pregnancies, which means that she’ll somehow still be skinnier than we’ve ever been. But really, the morning sickness sounds fucking terrible.

Because Kate is a little busy puking her guts out, I took it upon myself to brainstorm some appropriately royal baby name options. We hope Her Royal Highness likes them, because she’ll definitely read this while she’s on bed rest.

BOYS

William: It’s boring af, but doesn’t the future King deserve to have a son named after him? William is a timeless name that will also get him a hot girlfriend in college. Like father, like son.

Harry: If they chose this, everyone would think they were naming the baby after Prince Harry, but we like to think Kate really just has a crush on Harry Styles. She just seems like the type of girl who would go to a One Direction concert.

Ringo: They already have one kid with a Beatles name, so why not throw out the rulebook and pick Ringo? Little Prince Ringo could definitely be the bad boy of the royal family, à la Crown Prince Edvard from the classic film The Prince and Me.

Matthew: No reason, I just like this name. Sue me.

GIRLS

Adele: The crown jewels are nice, but England’s greatest national treasure is definitely Adele. Grammys are cool and all, but she deserves some royal recognition.

Elizabeth: The Queen turned 91 this spring, so realistically time is running out to suck up to her by naming your kid after her. By the time The Crown runs out of material about the Queen, little Princess Elizabeth will be old enough to have her own Netflix show.

Blair: Even though Gossip Girl ended like, a million years ago, we still feel strongly that it’s Blair Waldorf’s destiny to have some connection to royalty. #JusticeForBlair

Diana: Yeah okay they’re probably not going to do this because if they were they would have just named Charlotte Diana but it would just be such a moving tribute and no we don’t have a lot of feelings about this.