It’s been almost exactly two years since we watched Becca Kufrin and Garrett Yrigoyen get engaged on The Bachelorette, and much like ~the times~ we are in, things with their relationship are looking more uncertain now than ever. From the jump, Garrett and Becca had to work through some… differences of opinions on things (i.e. all those problematic social media posts he liked), but after a couple years together, it seemed like they had more or less reached some kind of understanding on their political differences. But earlier this summer, as systemic racism and police brutality received renewed attention, those divides between Becca and Garrett came to the surface once again.
Garrett’s lengthy Instagram post in support of police caused major controversy, and Becca’s friend and podcast cohost Rachel Lindsay made no secret of her feelings toward Garrett. On an episode of the Bachelor Happy Hour podcast last month, she said she doesn’t “f*ck with Garrett,” and those feelings clearly have not changed. In an appearance on Danny Pellegrino’s Everything Iconic podcast this week, Rachel didn’t hold back when asked about Garrett. “I think he’s a piece of sh*t,” she said. “I have said to , ‘I will not f*ck with him.’ He has doubled down on his beliefs. This isn’t the first time he’s had problematic behavior. When he was on the season, he had a history of ‘liking’ things that were racist, sexist, homophobic, calling the Parkland students child actors, it was a lot, so this is who this man is. And he’s a piece of sh*t to me.”
A PIECE OF SH*T. Let me tell you, the rush of serotonin I felt when I first read that quote was unlike anything I’ve felt in 2020. Thank you, Rachel, for making me feel alive. In the new interview, she provided more context for why she was so angered by Garrett’s post, and why she felt the need to address her feelings publicly. She said, “We had a podcast about diversity and what was going on in the country and her fiancé posted a Blue Lives Matter picture, and with his whole chest gave his long explanation as to why he felt that way. So I got on the podcast saying it was problematic,” and says she and Becca both “got emotional.”
Rachel says that her honesty with Becca “was great for us and our friendship,” which is a relief, since I imagine sh*tting on your friend’s man can be a touchy subject. Also, Becca being okay with Rachel’s criticism of Garrett would make even more sense if the rumors of a Becca/Garrett split are true. In her initial BLM conversation with Rachel, Becca seemed optimistic that Garrett would come around, but in the Bachelor Happy Hour episode from June 16, she gave what seemed like a grim update on her relationship status: “all I can say right now is that I don’t know.” Since then, neither Garrett nor Becca have posted or commented publicly about each other, and rumors of a split are running rampant at this point.
On this week’s podcast, Pellegrino asked Rachel about Becca’s relationship status, but she declined to answer “out of respect” for her friend. As much as I want to know the tea, there was zero chance Rachel was going to answer that question.
When If Becca does break up with Garrett, I’m sure she’ll announce it on her own terms, whether that’s an Instagram post, a podcast episode, or a People exclusive (get that money, girl!). I just hope it’s soon, so we can all just forget about Garrett, and she can find someone better.
Images: Ron Adar / Shutterstock.com
It’s been a big couple of weeks in Bachelor Nation, mainly centered on the fact that we’re finally getting a Black Bachelor next season. After mounting pressure to address the lack of diversity and racial sensitivity within the franchise, including a petition with thousands of signatures, ABC made their big announcement that Matt James would be the next Bachelor last week. But given that ABC and The Bachelor have otherwise been silent about the racial issues within the franchise, the timing and nature of the announcement raised some questions.
On Watch What Happens Live this week, Rachel Lindsay said she “hated the timing” of the announcement “because it does seem like a reaction to what is happening in our country.” She questioned, “Did a man have to die in such a public way on a national stage for you to say now is the time for us to have a Black Bachelor?” While ABC execs claim that the decision to make Matt James the Bachelor was made independently of the current Black Lives Matter protests, it’s hard to see the timing of the announcement as anything but reactionary. Normally, the new Bachelor is announced after The Bachelorette airs, and he’s chosen from contestants who have already been on the show. ABC may have wanted Matt James as the Bachelor all along, but would they have made an announcement this soon without external pressure?
On WWHL, Rachel also continued her calls for a wider focus on diversity and inclusion across the franchise, and said that she’s been in contact with the producers about how to implement these practices. So far, ABC or Bachelor execs have not detailed an actual plan to ensure a more diverse show, though The Bachelor executive producers said in a statement, “We are taking positive steps to expand diversity in our cast, in our staff, and most importantly, in the relationships that we show on television.” ABC Entertainment president Karey Burke echoed, “This is just the beginning and we will continue to take action with regard to diversity issues on this franchise.”
On top of the questions about the Bachelor franchise’s intentions with the announcement, it also made us wonder—what is going on with The Bachelorette? Way back in March, Matt James was initially announced as a contestant on Clare Crawley’s season, which was delayed indefinitely because of the pandemic. Obviously, he won’t be competing on The Bachelorette anymore, but was this news to Clare? On the heels of the last week’s announcement, a source told Us Weekly that Clare “wasn’t given any heads up,” and that she “didn’t know about Matt becoming the Bachelor until the GMA announcement.” On Wednesday, ABC exec Rob Mills went on Ryan Seacrest’s radio show, where he firmly denied this report. He said that “of course we would never do that to Clare,” adding, “she found out the day before.”
At this point, it kind of feels like Clare Crawley is the forgotten stepchild of the Bachelor franchise, but don’t worry, her season is definitely still happening. This week, various announcements were made, and now we have a lot more clarity about when and how they’re moving forward. ABC unveiled their official fall programming schedule earlier this week, with The Bachelorette slotted for Tuesday nights (The Bachelor will return to Monday nights in January). ABC Entertainment President Karey Burke spoke to Deadline, confirming that the show is scheduled to start filming in July, and that there is a “very thoughtful” plan in place for how to make it happen.
#TheBachelorette is moving to Tuesday this season cuz of football. #TheBachelor will be back on Mondays. Long live #BachelorMondays!
— Mike Fleiss (@fleissmeister) June 17, 2020
In his interview on Ryan Seacrest’s show, Rob Mills outlined more details of what’s actually going to happen. Production for Clare’s season will be contained within a “bubble,” with all cast and crew tested for COVID-19 before entering. Instead of the beloved Bachelor mansion, Mills said “They’ll be at some sort of resort,” where the entire season will take place. While travel is off the table this year, Mills promised that “there will be plenty of different date locations that will feel hopefully as close to The Bachelorette as possible.”
So we won’t be getting trips to exciting locales like Australia or Cleveland, but it’s better than my initial idea of doing the whole season in an empty airplane hangar. And despite all the adjustments, there’s one thing that even a pandemic can’t take away from us: makeouts. When asked about whether we’ll see kissing on this season of The Bachelorette, Mills said, “We think it’ll be absolutely safe.” Personally, I feel like it’s going to be triggering to watch Clare make out with multiple randos in one episode, but at least something will feel normal again.
Images: ABC/Paul Hebert; Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen / YouTube; fleissmeister / Twitter
If you’ve been educating yourself on racism and having difficult conversations at home, you’re not the only one—Becca Kufrin revealed on a recent episode of the Bachelor Happy Hour podcast that she’s been having conversations with her fiancé, Garrett Yrigoyen. A couple weeks ago, Garrett made a post in support of police on Instagram and received backlash, including from Bachelor alum Bekah Martinez. After the controversy, Becca Kufrin discussed the post on last week’s episode of her Bachelor Happy Hour podcast, and seemed torn. Her cohost, Rachel Lindsay, expressed how disappointing and hurtful the post was, and the resulting conversation was tense and uncomfortable.
On this Tuesday’s new episode of Bachelor Happy Hour, Becca began with a lengthy apology to Rachel and the audience, acknowledging that she “fell short” in the previous week’s episode, and that she can “do much better.” She apologized for not being fully engaged in the previous week’s conversation, saying that these topics deserved “more care and thoughtfulness.” She said that she was “gutted” to listen back to herself, and pledged that going forward, she will join Rachel as both a colleague and a friend in fighting for these important issues. She also brought up the concept of intent vs. impact, realizing that though her intention “was never to cause a divide, that is exactly what happened.” She reiterated that her words in the last episode were “very lacking,” and said that she will work harder to be aware of her privilege, and be more proactive about being informed on topics like systemic racism. Rachel accepted her apology, and thanked her for her commitment to do better.
On top of apologizing for her own words, Becca also acknowledged that when trying to do better, she can no longer speak for others, Garrett included. She offered a vague update on the status of their relationship, saying, “For those who are curious about my relationship with Garrett at this point, I all I can say right now is that I don’t know.” She added, “It’s something that we are trying to work through, and discuss, and do work on at home at this time, and that’s where the work will remain.” It’s been common knowledge that Becca and Garrett disagree on certain political issues, but it seems like this could be indicative of a larger divide between them. As for Rachel, she flat-out said on the podcast “I don’t f*ck with Garrett, and I don’t need to,” so I think we know where she stands on that.
Whatever work is going on at home, both Becca and Garrett are keeping it off of social media. In the past week, Becca’s only feed post is a TikTok of her dog set to “U Can’t Touch This.” Garrett, on the other hand, has spent the last few days getting philosophical. Since his pro-police post, he’s posted three photos of himself, each with a lengthy caption quoting Robin Homer’s writings on Marcus Aurelius, a Roman emperor and philosopher from the second century. His most recent post focuses on the principle that “Your Opinion of Yourself Matters More Than the Opinion of a Stranger,” which seems pointed at the criticisms he received the other week.
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Meditations of Marcus Aurelius SUMMARIZED (22 Stoic Principles to Live by) – Robin Homer’s Vox Stoica Principle 6. Your Opinion of Yourself Matters More Than the Opinion of a Stranger ______________________________________________________ “It never ceases to amaze me: we all love ourselves more than other people, but care more about their opinion than our own.” This isn’t an exhortation to arrogance. It’s reminding you to do what you know is best regardless of people’s reactions. You know what you’re about and you know the reason why you’re doing what you’re doing. You don’t need to explain yourself to everyone…As a crutch to avoid being too concerned with praise, Marcus Aurelius suggests contemplating what difference it really makes and considering the insignificance of it in the grand scheme of things…”fame in a world like this is worthless.” His conclusion from all this is that we should be honest and straightforward. We shouldn’t prance about, keep airs or try to portray ourselves as something we’re not…
While Becca and Garrett are dealing with their relationship privately, Bekah Martinez (from Arie’s season) and Garrett have gotten into it pretty publicly in recent weeks. After Garrett’s thin blue line post, she called him out in the comments, calling his words “scary as f*ck” and calling the post “a great reminder that not much has changed” about Garrett’s views. In addition, Bekah made a $1,000 donation to the National Police Accountability Project in Garrett’s name, because a generous troll is the best kind.
In response, Garrett screenshotted Bekah’s comment and posted it on his story, declaring that “needless to say you never got to know me, still don’t know me, and you’re no longer invited over.” Becca and Bekah (yeah, I’m confused too) were on The Bachelor together, and have been good friends since, so the uninviting seemed like a big slap in the face, but it turns out Bekah didn’t really care too much.
Last week, she went on Ben Higgins and Ashley Iaconetti’s podcast, where she cleared things up: “I don’t particularly like Garrett and I’m not interested in having dinner with him.” She said that she loves and has “a lot of respect for Becca,” but “Garrett is Garrett.” She also added that she hasn’t been “super close” with Becca Kufrin for a while, so yeah, she’s probably not going over to their house any time soon regardless.
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Images: Roy Rochlin/Getty Images; gy_yrigoyen / Instagram
As much as we love talking about The Bachelor, it’s no secret that the franchise has some major issues when it comes to diversity. As it’s been discussed far and wide, The Bachelor has never done an adequate job of promoting diversity and racial equality across its shows. From a lack of diversity on screen (just one Black lead in FORTY seasons), to repeatedly casting people with a history of insensitive social media behavior, these issues have been around for a long time, and ABC is finally starting to addressing them, beginning with their announcement today for the next Bachelor.
Earlier this week, a Bachelor Diversity Campaign was launched, along with a petition that called on ABC and Warner Bros. to take 13 specific actions to address the issues within the franchise. The petition has garnered over 85,000 signatures in less than a week, and today demand number one has officially been met. On Friday morning, Matt James was announced as the next Bachelor, becoming the first Black man to lead the show in its 25-season run.
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This morning, Matt James appeared on Good Morning America, where he was introduced as the next Bachelor. James, who is best friends with Tyler Cameron, was initially cast as a contestant on Clare Crawley’s allegedly-still-happening season of The Bachelorette, but after they butted heads publicly on Twitter, maybe it’s for the best that he’ll be skipping that.
Of course, it’s exciting to see a Black man at the helm of The Bachelor. It took way too long to arrive at this moment, and for once, ABC did the right thing. But make no mistake, if the network is serious about addressing the issues within the franchise, this needs to be the beginning of the changes. In a statement, Karey Burke, the President of ABC Entertainment, said, “We know we have a responsibility to make sure the love stories we’re seeing on screen are representative of the world we live in…we will continue to take action with regards to diversity issues on this franchise.” Burke added, “we feel privileged to have Matt as our first Black Bachelor.”
In an interview for GMA, Rachel Lindsay cautioned against celebrating ABC for putting “a band-aid” over the larger issues, saying that she wants to see larger changes like producers of color and leads that are “interested in dating outside of their race.” In his GMA interview, Matt James agreed that his casting is “a step in the right direction,” and that he hopes to be the first of many Black men in his position.
FIRST ON @GMA: The new @BachelorABC is Matt James.
Season 25 of “The Bachelor” is scheduled to premiere in 2021. https://t.co/c1NVcVkkpS #TheBachelor #BachelorNation pic.twitter.com/VEpDJMIlR2
— Good Morning America (@GMA) June 12, 2020
Bachelor Nation spoke out loud and clear, and ABC was forced to listen. But there are still 12 other points on that petition that also should be addressed. Will we get a diverse cast? Will ABC commit to thoroughly vetting their contestants, so we don’t have known racists appearing on their shows? Will they commit to fostering an actual conversation around diversity on their shows? Hopefully, yes! But we don’t know any of those things yet, so today’s announcement should be seen as an important milestone, not the final destination. That’s the whole thing about being an active ally—there is no final destination, but you can always keep going in the right direction.
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Images: ABC/Craig Sjodin; bachelorabc / Instagram; gma / Twitter
If you’ve ever paid attention to the Bachelor, even a little bit, chances are you’ve seen a whole lot of white people. In 18 years and 40 seasons of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, only once has a Black person been cast as the season lead. It’s an upsetting statistic, but one that points to a greater pattern of complicity in the franchise as a whole. Now, with conversations about race taking center stage in every corner of our lives, it feels like ABC can’t figuratively (or literally, IDK how they work) put their hands over their ears and yell “LALALA” about The Bachelor‘s longstanding lack of diversity anymore.
It’s not like issues with diversity on The Bachelor and The Bachelorette haven’t come up before. Actually, Chris Harrison, the host of all the Bachelor shows, has repeatedly been asked about diversity in the franchise, and some of his comments have been quite troubling. In 2017, when describing Rachel Lindsay’s contestants, he remarked, “It’s a very diverse cast, but at the same time, very professional.” This comment raised eyebrows at the time, with many pointing out that he almost certainly wouldn’t make the same comment about a white cast. Last year, when speaking to a group of USC journalism students about diversity on The Bachelor, he said, “You have to take it as it comes … because then it’s organic and then it feels right,” adding that you can’t “force things.” Just last month in a radio interview, he acknowledged that the franchise has lagged on diversity, but insisted that “we’ve done much better in the last few seasons for sure.”
Whether or not you buy what Chris said in May, the last two weeks have been a disappointing time to be a Bachelor fan. The franchise’s official social media accounts have remained completely silent about the Black Lives Matter movement, and the wider conversation on racial justice. Chris Harrison has posted nothing but a black square last Tuesday. Mike Fleiss has shown his support for BLM on Twitter, but hasn’t tied that in to any issues in his own franchise. Last week, Rachel Lindsay, the only Black lead in Bachelor history, slammed the lack of diversity in the franchise, calling it “embarrassing,” and noting that a Black person is nearly as likely to be elected President of the United States as they are to be chosen as the Bachelor.
Chris Harrison: when we come back… more white people! #TheBachelorGOAT
— The Betchelor🥀 (@betchelorpod) June 9, 2020
And on Monday, The Bachelor: The Greatest Seasons – Ever!, the franchise’s solution to coronavirus production delays, premiered. This eight episode special was supposed to be a celebration of the franchise’s greatest moments, but given the current climate, it instead served as a disturbing reminder that The Bachelor has always had a race problem. Kay Brown and Chris Burns, who host The Betchelor podcast, did some calculations, and in Monday night’s three-h0ur premiere (seriously, why are these shows so long?), Black people were shown speaking on screen for only 14 SECONDS. Think about that. 14 seconds. If you don’t think this is a problem, then you’re part of the problem.
But if there’s ever been a time to fix these problems, it’s right now. Over the weekend, a Bachelor Diversity Campaign Instagram account was launched, and on Monday, they launched a petition calling on ABC and Warner Bros. to commit to concrete actions to combat racism in the Bachelor franchise. The petition outlines 13 specific points, starting with casting a Black lead for the next season of The Bachelor. Considering most of us wanted Mike Johnson last season, this one should be easy for ABC. The petition also asks for a commitment that each season will have at least 35% BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, and People of Color) contestants.
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IT’S TIME. Join us in asking ABC for a #BIPOCBachelor. Bachelor Nation is ready for change. Link in bio to sign our petition asking for active anti-racism within the Bachelor Franchise, both in front of and behind the camera. Screenshot your signed petition, tag @bachdiversity, and use #BIPOCBachelor. For a quick overview of the petition and our asks of ABC, follow along in our stories.
In addition to specific 0n-screen measures, like a “zero-tolerance policy for racism on-air” and giving “equitable screen time to BIPOC contestants,” the petition extends to off-screen measures that will help to combat racial inequality in the franchise as a whole. These include hiring a BIPOC diversity consultant to oversee all aspects of production, vetting potential contestants more thoroughly (to avoid situations like this), and “providing resources to help viewers learn more about BIPOC stories and organizations supporting BIPOC causes.” Really, none of these things should even be controversial, so I hope ABC and Warner Bros. do the right thing.
The final point in the petition, which I imagine might cause some discomfort, asks that ABC and Warner Bros. “Issue a public statement apologizing for enabling systemic racism within the franchise,” along with establishing a specific plan to do better moving forward. People usually don’t like admitting that they’ve been a part of the problem, but in this case, it seems like the only way that true change and growth can begin. In less than a day, over 50,000 people have signed the petition, and it has gained support from many Bachelor alums, including Rachel Lindsay, Tyler Cameron, Ben Higgins, and Kaitlyn Bristowe. After years of frustration and disappointment at The Bachelor’s handling of race, it’s time for some meaningful change.
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Images: ABC/John Fleenor; betchelorpod / Twitter; bachdiversity / Instagram
As you may know, I usually love documenting the messy behavior of our favorite (and least favorite) Bachelor alums. From Amanda Stanton maybe stealing a Chanel bag to TikToks that make me want to die, it’s usually a fun ride. But over the weekend, things went from fun to depressing real quick. On Saturday, Hannah Brown said the N-word on Instagram live, and the resulting fallout has been anything but fun to watch.
On the IG live, Hannah was trying to learn the TikTok dance to DaBaby’s song “Rockstar,” and she said some of the lyrics that happened to include that word. When people on the live first called her out, she said she was sorry, but also that she didn’t think she said it, and she was also laughing the whole time. She later said she would “never use that word”, and that “y’all can think I said whatever I did or think I’m something I’m not, but I’m not that.” Yikes. On Sunday, she issued more of an actual apology, but the whole thing has just left an awful taste in my mouth.
Aside from all the reasons why this is obviously not okay, it’s been interesting to see which members of Bachelor Nation have spoken out publicly. While many have sadly said nothing, at least there are some people in this weird world who have their heads on straight. Here are the most notable reactions.
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Rachel Lindsay has got to be one of smartest, most well-spoken people in Bachelor Nation, and she also happens to be the only black lead in the history of the show. With that in mind, I was really interested to hear what she had to say about this situation. In an Instagram Live video, she said she was personally offended, but rather than call Hannah out, she reached out to her directly. Rachel asked Hannah to address her comments on video, saying, “When you’re bold enough to say the N-word on your platform… you need to be bold enough to use your face, on camera, and apologize in the same way that you said the word.”
Understandably, Rachel was disappointed and hurt when Hannah only apologized through a text post on Instagram stories. This may seem like a small thing, but there’s something important about showing your face and admitting you were wrong. In her video, Rachel said she’s “tired of feeling like I have to be the one to speak,” and I totally get it. It’s not fair for pressure to be placed on her to react in these situations, but she did an excellent job of communicating her feelings.
Bekah was one of the first people in Bachelor Nation to publicly comment on what happened, and she had a lot to say throughout the day on Sunday. First, she called Hannah out (without naming her) in a couple of stories, urging that we need to do a better job of holding people accountable. She also addressed the people who apparently think it doesn’t count when you say the word in a song, which I didn’t realize was something people still legitimately thought in 2020.
In a subsequent video, Bekah acknowledged that she’s not perfect either, and that she’s worked hard to “unlearn” the ignorance that she grew up with. She says that this process was “difficult and uncomfortable,” but that it’s disappointing to see others not putting in that work and acknowledging their mistakes.
Then, later in the day, she hopped back on stories, saying that she wishes she removed the “call out” part of her initial stories, and instead focused on the educational aspect. That’s all well and good, but she has no reason to apologize. Hannah f*cked up, and there’s no reason people need to tiptoe around holding her accountable.
In an Instagram story on Sunday night, Mike said that he received DMs calling him out for not addressing the situation sooner, accusing him of “not defending women of color.” While he said he hadn’t seen the video yet, he made his thoughts clear: “she shouldn’t have said the N-word, it’s pretty damn simple.” He then asked people not to come for him for not keeping up with every little thing that happens in Bachelor Nation. Honestly, relatable.
If I’m being honest, Tyler Cameron’s responses to this whole thing have felt a little wishy-washy. In an Instagram story, he said that Rachel Lindsay “hit the nail on the head,” and that “we have a long ways to go on this issue.” That’s certainly true, but then he changed gears to sort of defending Hannah. Uh, what?
He said, “This is not about dragging HB. This is about using your platform for reasons like this. So we can educate those who don’t get it. This is bigger than HB. This is a societal problem.” Like, yes, it is definitely a societal problem, but it’s also an HB problem. No one should be sending Hannah threats or anything, but it’s absolutely justified for people to be hurt and angry, and to call her out for what she did.
In a response to a DM, Tyler also took kind of an odd stance: “In these moments you have the opportunity to burry someone or lift them up. We need to lift HB up from this. She is learning and growing just like every single one of us. Love rids hate. Hate only makes more hate. Let’s learn and lift each other up with love.” Whatever Tyler is smoking, I’d like some. Of course, it’s important to educate and grow and love and all that sh*t, but it’s been one day. People are still mad, which is a completely valid response, because Hannah used a racial slur with centuries of hate-filled baggage attached to it, and nobody should be dismissing those feelings of anger and hurt so quickly. A quick glance through Instagram comments will show that the majority of the people who are rushing to forgive her are not the ones who have truly felt the damage that this word can cause (TL;DR: they’re white). And not only did Hannah use the word, but her initial response was so flippant, you’d think it was no big deal. Of course I hope she grows and learns and takes meaningful actions to do better in the future, but that doesn’t mean we should give her a free pass because “everyone makes mistakes.”
Nick Viall was just trying to do a normal Q&A on Sunday, but naturally a ton of people wanted his thoughts on the Hannah controversy. He kept it simple, saying “There is no excuse. Period. Super sad and disappointing to see.” Honestly, that’s about all I need from someone like Nick. I actually really like that he directed people to Rachel’s Instagram Live, rather than trying to make this about him sharing his own thoughts.
UPDATE: Another day has passed, and thankfully, more people from Bachelor Nation have spoken out about the whole situation with Hannah Brown.
I had no idea what was going on until last night, & didnt get the full story/see the video until this morning.
Watching her get quiet when she approached the N-word in the lyrics tells me she knew she shouldnt have said it. Ive heard more sincere apologies from a box of cereal. https://t.co/g0rNXsOcx0
— Diggy Moreland (@diggymoreland) May 18, 2020
I love Diggy so much. He keeps it real 100% of the time, and he has no time for any of this nonsense. He made a good observation about how Hannah seemed reluctant to say the word in the first place. Others have also pointed out that she specifically didn’t say the F-word in the same song. Interesting, for sure. But yeah, can’t argue with Diggy’s opinion on her apology.
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I didn’t want to have to say anything, and I honestly shouldn’t have to say anything. Ya’ll know what is wrong here, I don’t need to break it down. I will say this…this is an opportunity for white people, especially those in bachelor nation, to practice being an ally to black people. It is an opportunity for you to hold other white people accountable when they’re not living or acting in a way that is anti-racist, to educate them and to educate yourselves on how to be an ally. Being an ally is a practice, and I’m going to call on you today to put that into practice. On a daily basis, black people put in an exhausting amount of emotional labor to educate white people on matters of race. When a black person puts in that emotional labor to educate, they then are often met with white fragility and put in even more emotional labor and support to console that white person in an attempt to sooth them so they can actually get to the root of the issue, be heard and seen, and actually educate. So, let’s not put this on black people to explain to other white people why saying the n word, in any context, is not okay…cause y’all know, and ya’ll need to start having these conversations with each other. You all know where I stand. Frankly, I’m not surprised. I have had countless interactions with a white person in that situation, and I’m just triggered. I have repeatedly had the word personally used against me throughout my life, in a way to belittle me, make me feel less than, and frankly to de-humanize me to justify treating me like shit. Words carry weight. Words are powerful. Be intentional and thoughtful with the words you use, even in what you think is a playful settings, because your words matter. So, #bachelornation, how are you going to show up as an ally?
Taylor Nolan made a post with a caption that called on white people, and especially those in Bachelor Nation, to take this opportunity to be true allies to people of color. She writes that how black people put in “an exhausting amount of emotional labor to educate white people on matters of race,” but that white people often aren’t receptive to what they hear. Particularly in Bachelor Nation, this is an important moment, and it’s telling who has spoken up, and who has remained quiet.
Danielle Maltby, from Nick Viall’s season, put a couple great posts on her Instagram story. She echoes Taylor’s post, saying that “It is not the job of black women to educate white people.” She also addresses all the people who think that singing it in a song is okay, or that it’s okay because black people say it all the time. Those are terrible excuses, and Danielle is having none of it.
I never thought I’d say this, but I’m really impressed by Cassie. Right off the bat, she says that saying the N-word is never okay, and acknowledges that her feelings don’t matter here. She cites the black women in Bachelor Nation who have already spoken on the topic, and says that we can all learn from this. While Tyler Cameron seemed too quick to forgive, Cassie really hit the right note of learning and growing, without acting like nothing bad happened in the first place.
It’s great that more people have spoken out in the last couple days, but there are still so many who have kept quiet. Chris Harrison, care to comment? No? Cool. I guess this shouldn’t be too surprising, but it’s still disappointing.
Images: Charley Gallay/Getty Images for PUMA; bachelorteaspill, Bekah, tylerjcameron3, nickviall, taymocha, dmmaltby, cassierandolph / Instagram; diggymoreland / Twitter
Good morning, Bachelor Nation—that is, everyone except Peter and Barb. I’m sure you’re all still reeling from last night’s finale, which somewhat succeeded in being unspoilable, but equally succeeded in being totally anticlimactic. Like, if I wanted to commit to 10 weeks of seeing the same people, only for them to end up going on one date after this, I’d just redownload a dating app onto my phone. Now, PLEASE DO NOT READ AHEAD IF YOU DO NOT WANT SPOILERS. Tbh, I feel like after a show airs live, there is no such thing as being “spoiled” anymore, but some of you have jobs/can’t watch The Bachelor live/are sensitive, so consider this my due diligence.
Last night, Peter took a page out of Arie’s playbook and dumped his final pick (Hannah Ann) to get back with his runner-up (Madison). Ya hate to see it. Hannah Ann, despite not being old enough to legally rent a car yet, surprisingly handled the situation with a hell of a lot of grace and maturity, which is more than I can say of every murder plot I’ve devised in my head for the strangers on the subway (whom I will never encounter again) who take their sweet-ass time boarding the train, knowing full well that there is a sea of people behind them, and the doors close in three seconds. Anyway!
Hannah Ann appeared on the Bachelor Happy Hour podcast with Rachel Lindsay and Becca Kufrin to talk about the ending to the ~most dramatic season ever~ (it may have finally lived up to the hype this time), and oh boy, did she hold back no punches, especially towards Peter. She also spoke about #ChampagneGate, the Finasco Fiasco, and of course, why Peter ain’t sh*t (my words, not hers).
By now I think we all realize that the infamous champagne theft was completely producer orchestrated. “I was completely blindsided by it and I didn’t know how to handle it,” Hannah Ann tells Becca and Rachel, adding ,”in the end, Kelsey and i were able to put aside our differences and become friends.” Hannah Ann claims she was trying to be as logical as possible and be like, “hey I didn’t steal your champagne,” but that came off the wrong way to some viewers.
Hannah Ann jokes about her whole finasco slip of the tongue, saying, “In the moment I said that, and I had no idea that I even like, spoke. That’s not even a word I had used in the past, I don’t know where that came from.” Honestly, been there literally every time I record a podcast. (Maybe I should see a doctor?) But then Rachel asks Hannah if she does, in fact, know the correct word, and it basically goes like this:
Rachel: You do know the right word, right?
Hannah Ann: yes.
Hannah Ann: …
So does Hannah Ann know the actual right word for fiasco? The jury’s still out on this one…
On Madison’s Ultimatum
Hannah Ann claims she had no idea about Madison’s ultimatum (which she doesn’t necessarily even consider an ultimatum, saying, “she was doing what’s best for her”), and assumed she and Peter had talked about their values before the Fantasy Suites. She says, “I knew she had certain lifestyle values that didn’t line up with Peter’s, but I assumed they’d had the conversation before.” Ya, like kind of how we all thought that certainly you wouldn’t wait that long to spring something so crucial on someone. But alas, we were all wrong!
She also says she was taken aback by the whole situation, but didn’t really want to focus on it too much, because, “I was just wanting to focus on me and him and not let anything distract me from that.” You can say what you want about Hannah Ann, but from the beginning, she was focused on one thing and one thing only: Peter. Even when it earned her Luke P comparisons. The girl is focused.
On Madison Leaving Early
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Now, this is the part where things start to get good, and in the same vein, where Peter starts to get shady. Grab your kettle, the tea is being warmed up. (Sorry.) Hannah Ann says she had no idea that Madison had left early, and that Peter totally minimized how unsure he was going into his engagement, as well as his feelings for Madison.
“It was completely downplayed,” she says. “He didn’t give me the courtesy or respect to have a sit-down conversation: hey this is what’s going on with me, this is where my headspace is at, let’s talk this through.” She says that Peter “just told me that very quickly and downplayed it and then immediately went to ‘but my heart chooses you, you’re the love of my life, I wanna spend forever with you.'” And, I mean, we all saw how he began his engagement speech by saying “Madison”. This tracks.
I ABSOLUTELY just thought Peter called Hannah Ann “Madison” and my soul left my body #TheBachelor pic.twitter.com/vw53SNAo8f
— Brett S. Vergara (@BrettSVergara) March 11, 2020
We all totally thought he pulled a Ross Geller for a second, don’t even lie.
On Getting Dumped
Listening to Hannah Ann’s interview (and yes, I’m taking it with a slight grain of salt because hindsight is 2020), I’m impressed with how perceptive she seems to be. When asked why she took so long to get to the rose ceremony, and almost didn’t show, she says, “My instincts were telling me I wasn’t getting all the information I needed to make a decision with Peter.” Hannah Ann may be not a girl, not yet a woman, but in this case, the woman’s intuition was spot-on.
She admits, “Should I have stayed on that bed in Australia? Absolutely. But I wasn’t going to give up on someone that I loved, and the last words he told me on our last chance date was that he was going to make the best decision for both of us, and to trust him.”
Hmmm, where have I heard that before? Oh right, every relationship with a f*ckboy I’ve ever been in. *Slaps self across the cheek* You’re right, this isn’t about me.
She says that, “I think in the end he took advantage of the fact that he conveniently left out very important information prior to me making a commitment with him.” Basically, Peter wasn’t honest about how conflicted he was feeling, but rushed ahead with the engagement anyway. I know there’s a ton of pressure on the show to propose, but it still wasn’t fair to Hannah Ann.
Hannah Ann adds, “He downplayed his feelings towards Madison completely, and even after our breakup he couldn’t really own up to it.” Apparently, Peter went so far as to reach out to Hannah Ann’s parents, but only to say that “basically he was struggling processing all his emotions.” Umm, yeah, I’ll say! That’s like saying you have a little case of the sniffles when you really are coronavirus patient zero. Hannah Ann says of Peter’s excuses to her parents, “It was very vague. He speaks half-truths. And so while I’m watching the season I’m like, why we broke up makes a whole lot more sense, because he couldn’t really own up to how he was truly feeling.”
This is, apparently, a common theme with Peter. A guy who gave up his career to compete for fame on a reality TV show, shady? Well, I never!
On The Timing Of The Breakup
Basically, Hannah Ann and Peter stayed together through January, but when the season started airing was when their relationship began to unravel—not coincidentally, because that was when Peter’s half-truths started coming to light for the nation (including Hannah Ann) to see.
She says, ” beginning of January was when he approached me that he needed to speak with Hannah Brown. That’s the first red flag. He told me he needed to talk to Hannah Brown because he needed closure and was trying to convince me I should feel comfortable with that. And I’m like, why do you need closure?” What Hannah Ann didn’t know at that time, was that Peter needed closure because he low-key invited Hannah B. back into the Bachelor mansion. Hannah Ann says before that, she’d never known about the group date, or seen Hannah B. ugly cry on the couch. But once she watched it, it all made sense.
Peter never did get that “closure” because about a week later, he and Hannah Ann broke up, which was at the very end of January. The crazy part about it is that Hannah Ann says, “We actually had talked that morning that we weren’t gonna break up, we were gonna work through it.” Yikes. I mean, at least Peter didn’t follow her around a house trying to browbeat her into forgiveness, but this is like, only marginally better.
And, back to Peter never really giving the whole story, the reason he gave Hannah Ann for the breakup was that, similarly to what he told her parents, “he was having trouble processing his emotions.” Like, dude. You weren’t having trouble processing your emotions. You were having trouble feeling emotions toward your fiancée. Let’s call a spade a spade.
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Hannah Ann reiterates, “Peter does not own up to the full truth—just like on our engagement day. He knew that if he told me the full extent of where his heart and head was at that entire week, he knew that the outcome would have been different. He knew that when we sat down and had an open, honest conversation, my instincts would have picked up on that he was not ready for a commitment. And that’s not what he wanted.”
Yeah, Peter just went full steam ahead because he wanted to put that ring on somebody’s finger, identity be damned.
In what might be my favorite quote ever, Hannah Ann says that Peter “was consistently inconsistent.” I love it. The accuracy. The poetry. The parallel structure. I’m putting this on a sticker. Honestly, Madison, good luck.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel for Hannah Ann, though. For one, she’ll absolutely kill it on Paradise, and who knows? Maybe four years from now, ABC will tote her out of the shadows to make her the Bachelorette. But she does say that Peter’s f*ckery “really helped me move forward because I deserve more than someone half-loving me. I deserve 100%.” Claps all around. Hannah Ann deserves the world, or at least, a Revolve modeling contract.
If you made it through this absolute novel, congrats! To hear more of what Hannah Ann said, listen to the Bachelor Happy Hour podcast below.
Images: ABC/John Fleenor; BrettSVergara / Twitter; thebetchelor / Instagram (2); Giphy (2)
We might be deep in the off-season for the Bachelor franchise, but that doesn’t mean the drama is taking a break. Bachelor Nation is still being just as messy as ever on social media, and today we have a random AF new feud to discuss. Somehow, some way, Colton Underwood and Rachel Lindsay are feuding, and I have a lot of questions. Let’s go over what we know.
To understand what’s going on with Colton and Rachel, we have to go back to the recent drama with Rachel and Raven Gates. It’s been a couple weeks since the story of Rachel and Raven’s falling out went public, but we’ve still never gotten details. Trust me, we’ve tried. Something obviously happened, but we will probably never find out what, and that’s beside the point right now. When Us Weekly posted about Rachel and Raven, Colton couldn’t resist giving his opinion in the comments.
As a quick little refresher on the Bachelor timeline, Rachel and Colton were never on any shows together, so it’s unclear what their actual relationship is like. Of course, all of the people in Bachelor Nation are interconnected, so it’s no surprise that these two know/know of each other, but Colton clearly has some beef with Rachel.
Colton later clarified his comment to Us Weekly with the following statement: “I’m not weighing in on the Rachel/Raven drama. I could care less about that, not my business. What is my business is the countless number of times she’s spoke poorly of me … including that time she ran her mouth about me to Cassie… Funny thing is I have never met her.”
Okay, so they’ve never even met each other? Honestly, who has the time to be this petty? Obviously, Colton’s comments only gave us his side of the story, and on Wednesday, Rachel finally spoke on the issue. She went on online talk show Whit & Ry, where she said that she’s too busy to focus on Colton: “I’m so confused as to why he thinks I ran my mouth. It’s so petty to me. As much as I wanted to go at him in the comments section, I just thought, ‘You know what? Excuse me. I need to go interview Oprah Winfrey.’ That was literally my mindset. I don’t have time for this.”
For reference, Rachel interviewed Oprah last week on the red carpet at the opening of Tyler Perry’s studio while working for Extra. Good for her, because I would kill for the ability to even breathe the same air as Oprah. But aside from that, she was adamant that she’s never spoken poorly of Colton to Cassie or anyone else, and she doesn’t understand why he’s coming for her.
She continued, inviting Colton to come on her Bachelor Happy Hour podcast to hash out their issues: “I would love for Colton to actually come on the podcast because what I’m not going to do is entertain you in the comments section of somebody else’s post. What I will do is have a grown-ass conversation with you and we can talk about it, but what I don’t appreciate are the accusations being made because I believe he said I ran my mouth to Cassie.”
Rachel also said that Cassie follows her on Instagram, and that she would “never tell another woman not to be with a man unless I had some type of relationship with her.” Basically, Rachel says that she’s met Cassie before, but doesn’t have any kind of friendship with her where she would comment on her relationship with Colton.
Rachel might not understand Colton’s problems with her, but Colton definitely paid attention to what Rachel had to say, and he responded on Twitter on Wednesday night:
I’ll come on your podcast Rachel. One condition: ask your producer to leave it raw, unedited and untouched. Looking forward to meeting you & pointing out your hypocrisy over the last year. https://t.co/O3yuMYa5Yd
— Colton Underwood (@colton) October 17, 2019
What does Colton think is happening here?? Either there’s some major information we’re missing here, or Colton is overly concerned about Rachel making him look bad. What does he have to say that would be mysteriously edited out of the final podcast? I need to know more about Rachel’s alleged hypocrisy, because if it’s as bad as Colton makes it sound, then there’s a lot of behind the scenes sh*t going on.
All I know is that if this podcast appearance actually happens, it might be the one time I actually tune in to Rachel and Ali’s podcast. I really hope Colton goes on the show, because there’s been a Bachelor-sized hole in my heart since Paradise ended. Spill all the tea, please!! There’s nothing I love more than a tense interview, and I have a feeling Rachel and Colton aren’t going to be super comfortable together. Fight, fight, fight!!!
Betches reached out to Colton Underwood, and he declined to comment for this article.
Images: Shutterstock; usweekly / Instagram; Colton / Twitter