If you’ve been following pop culture for the past decade, you likely know by now that no one controls their images more closely than the Kardashians. There’s a reason the common saying exists: “The devil works hard, but Kris Jenner works harder.” The momager, by her own account—as documented in her “mem-wah”—runs a tight ship.
Before I continue: What’s most important to understand in the context of the Kardashians is that they are, first and foremost, a brand. A mega-brand, at that. And, like with any brand, image is everything, and must be upheld at all costs. Because if your brand suffers a PR fallout or an image crisis, the revenue consequences can be disastrous. (Just ask Victoria’s Secret.)
That’s why Khloé Kardashian’s recent blunder should be the family’s worst nightmare.
Not because the unedited, unfiltered photo of the third-oldest Kardashian leaked in the first place. She looks great—many Twitter users, in fact, said it was the best photo of her they’ve seen in years. (I just sincerely hope MJ is in a safe place right now.)
No, the blunder is that their reaction to the photo was so incredibly toxic and so obviously embarrassing, and deserves widespread ridicule—as well as a serious reflection on our part regarding to whom we give our attention and money.
As many people know by now, Khloé allegedly had her lawyers and even reportedly her sister Kim (!) reach out personally to Reddit and Twitter users who posted the photo—and tweets left and right were swept off the Internet faster than you can say “bible.” (Which is especially troubling when you consider the platform consistently lets off Nazis and death threat-spewing users scot-free.)
If Khloé and Ko. weren’t familiar with the Streisand Effect before—an Internet-age social phenomenon in which the act of suppressing information actually further draws attention to it—they certainly are now. The photo went viral, and Khloé released a statement decrying society’s bullying and impossible beauty standards, and how they have impacted her over the years. And that’s completely fair. I totally have empathy for her there. Getting called “the fat sister” by the media for years isn’t a fate I’d wish on anyone.
But she lost me when she acted like she’s a victim of society’s beauty standards in 2021 when she and her family are major perpetrators of the problem. It’s been more than a decade since the Kardashians came onto the scene as just a regular, albeit rich and connected, relatable family (rather than the fully formed brand they are today). Hundreds of millions of followers later, and with impossibly small, photoshopped waists and surgically enhanced behinds attributed to “hard work and exercise” (rather than the work of very talented LA-based plastic surgeons, or at the very least, personal trainers), the Kardashians have, for years, wielded a staggering amount of power over women’s self-esteem, and society’s beauty standards as a whole. Who do you think started the signature “Instagram face,”aka an oversize pout, button nose, and fox-like eyes? This, all while selling women products that capitalize on their specifically feminine insecurities—whether it’s body makeup, or contouring kits, or slimming shapewear. (Jameela Jamil was onto something when she dubbed the Kardashians “double agents for the patriarchy.”)
Like it or not, Kim, Kourtney, Khloé, Kendall, and Kylie brandish massive influence, and have, in a way, become “the standard” that women everywhere have emulated in the looks department—a standard that, to be clear, has been largely appropriated from women of color, from their signature features, to their style choices.
And if even the Kardashians—with their plastic surgery and trainers and personal chefs—are so miserable with their own appearances that they’ll sue over an unfiltered photo, what hope do the rest of us have? Why should any of us feel comfortable with our naked, unfiltered, unedited bodies if even a Kardashian can’t feel happy with hers?
What a message to send.
To me, the act of threatening legal action and having Twitter users’ accounts suspended for 12+ hours simply for posting an “unflattering” photo is self-hatred at its most distilled. (And it’s especially ironic when you remember that Khloé runs a brand, according to its website, on a platform of body acceptance.)
It didn’t end there, though: After the photo went viral, Khloé took to Instagram Live to show off her toned body, from a distance, in a dimly lit room. As if she had something to prove. As if she was saying, “I don’t look like THAT. There’s something inherently wrong with looking like that, and I need to prove to you that I don’t.”
In one fell swoop, the Kardashians alienated women everywhere and showed themselves for who they really are: self-hating, fatphobic hypocrites. And while that might sound harsh, they are a brand, after all. And as far as I’m concerned, Kris Jenner and her krew need to rapidly evolve with today’s times before their brand gets left behind in the 2010s, just like Victoria’s Secret.
Images: Jamie McCarthy/WireImage
I stopped following all the Kardashians on social media when Khloé used “anorexic” as a compliment in 2018. It was the final nail in the coffin (shaped nails) of their toxic behavior and hindrance to the positive body image movement of which they once fancied themselves as champions.
But you don’t have to be following them to be keenly aware of their most recent content catastrophe, all provoked by an unfiltered, unphotoshopped, and by all standards very nice photo of Khloé in a bikini. It doesn’t look like the Khloé we know from TV and Instagram. It looks like the Khloé that may actually exist.
The photo is said to have been taken on a recent family vacation to Palm Springs, and was either leaked by an assistant or her grandmother (whose grandmother hasn’t taken a photo of us we don’t approve of?). But it’s not the photo for once that’s making headlines: It’s the aftermath.
After its initial posting, the offending bikini pic was removed faster than an accidental like on your ex’s Instagram, with the family allegedly working overtime to scrub any traces of it from the internet forever (a gargantuan feat, even for a family with such a firm grip on the media and its inner workings). Sister Kim herself even got involved, allegedly direct messaging people to request its removal, citing the image, taken in broad daylight, as being “doctored”, taken “in the worst lighting”, and a “copywright infringement” as opposed to the truth, which is that it’s just not an image Khloé has carefully curated for the world to see.
On its (contoured) face, this is just another effort on the famous family’s part to control their narrative and image, but dig a bit deeper and it’s all just extremely sad. The Kardashians, what with all their yacht-loads of external validation (a combined 80 gazillion Instagram followers and “likes,” a slew of homes, so much money, access to any and everything) are no further along—and in fact, they seem frighteningly behind—people without an ounce of their resources, money, and fame to find a shred of self-worth. The timing of the incident, right before news also broke of Kim Kardashian officially becoming a billionaire, pretty perfectly drives home that sentiment.
The sadness I feel about Khloé, who has spent years (and, as she laid out on Instagram on Thursday, her entire life) publicly striving to achieve a version of herself that she finds “worthy” is twofold. Look at that photo and you’ll see what we have been conditioned by society and media to believe is the ideal body: a flat stomach, curves in the exact right places. These are things that I—and most people—don’t have! And yet she is so ashamed of it, writing on Instagram that it “doesn’t capture your body the way it is after working so hard to get to this point” with its non-Barbie doll smoothness (thank you, Diet Starts Tomorrow for that analogy) that her sister—who, by all accounts, has plenty more to do with her time than reach out to random people on social media—is doing everything she can to hide it.
View this post on Instagram
It’s equally as sad to learn that Khloé has obviously not found her own version of self-acceptance and has not done the internal work necessary to love, or at least make peace with, the external. The message being sent to millions of young (and not-so-young) women who look up to her and her sisters is that this more-than-acceptable body is simply unacceptable.
Even her response is sad, going on Instagram Live to prove that “this isn’t photoshopped” when in reality the only difference in the Palm Springs image is a bit of skin texture. It’s impossible to comprehend what it’s like to be ridiculed by the media for the way you look, but the reaction—one that can only be compared to that of a leaked sex tape as opposed to simply acknowledging that it’s a bad photo and moving on—speaks louder than a caption could.
It’s also impossible not to examine this incident as it pertains to her clothing brand, Good American, whose Instagram bio literally reads “representing body acceptance”. Often heralded as “expensive but worth it” by legions of fans on TikTok and actually impressive in terms of size offerings compared to most other fashion brands, here we see a true inability for Khloé to practice what she preaches.
Whereas many of the models in Good American’s marketing materials represent a more realistic body image, a recent campaign image of Khloé looked more like one of those Stretch Armstrong dolls of the ‘90s, all elongated limbs and a distorted body shape. She wants to be a champion of body diversity—just not when it comes to her own body.
Looking at the images Khloé did choose to share drums up toxic feelings, too. Despite knowing that they’re likely doctored, despite knowing everything I do about feeling good in my skin and the pitfalls of comparison especially on social media,, there’s a small part of my brain that’s jealous of the woman in this image, with her flawless skin and exposed rib cage. As long as we continue to glorify images like this one, and these women in general, the longer it will be before shifting beauty standards and healthier relationships with our bodies will trickle down to us, the masses.
If nothing else, perhaps this might be a moment of reckoning for anyone who still views these women as body image role models. It’s high time we all realize that the Kardashians, with their weight loss tea spon con and usage of skinny as the ultimate compliment, are anything but.
Images: Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images; khloekardashian / Instagram
Guys, we made it to 2021. After the complete bullsh*t that was last year, I really hope this year is better. Although so far it’s not super great. I mean, wtf, I thought when the new year hit, everything would be magically fixed, I’d suddenly have the will to exercise again, and the world would make sense. Is that not how it works? But the good news is despite the world literally going up in flames (at least in the U.S.) and a global pandemic, we will always have some consistency in our lives. And that is the fact that Kim Kardashian (no longer West) has no idea what her face looks like. She also really has no idea what a human face looks like. As we know, Kim is the guiltiest of guilty when it comes to Facetune/Photoshop, second only to her sister Kylie. Let me tell you, at this point I’m partially convinced they’re just lizard people trying to pose as humans because why else must they edit their faces so much in every single pic? WHAT ARE YOU HIDING, GUYS?
So my editor sent this pic:
View this post on Instagram
And I was like, “K, cool, who is this?”
Which. Do you know how many articles like this I’ve written about Kim? Do you know how many valuable hours of my life I have spent staring at her stupid face(s)? And still, this edit is so bad that I legit did not know who it was until I looked at the name. And even then, I was like, “Wait did they use some model? IS SHE JOKING?” But no! She was not joking. Kim thinks this is passable for her own face (and don’t even get me started on the body).
So, why doesn’t it look like Kim? Well. For starters, it looks like Bella Hadid.
View this post on Instagram
Who, let’s be real, doesn’t seem to look like herself (or human) anymore either. (What the f*ck is happening to these people???) Look, if you’re going to be editing your pics (which, I highly suggest you don’t, because I think it ultimately harms your self-esteem, aside from fixing just small things like acne or lighting), keeping your face proportions consistent is the most important. I’ve said it a million times, and I’ll say it again: These slight differences are truly what gives you your own face. The Kardashian Krowd does not do this, and that is why every pic of them looks like different people.
Here’s a close-up of Kim’s pic:
What, and I cannot stress this enough, THE F*CK? She looks like her face is made of playdough. The entire left side is stretched out and it looks like she realized this and tried to smush it back together, resulting in a nose that is literally melting off her face. Her eyes are pulled into a super sharp angle (very common surgical procedure too—see above, Bella Hadid), but she pushed it even further and now they don’t even match. Her lips are also smashed and blown up way bigger than even her injections would allow.
Casual reminder that this is Kim’s normal (well, for all the work she’s had done) face, as of February 2020.
And in case you want to try to tell me It’S tHe AnGle, here ya go.
Here you can really see how bulbously stretched out the left side of her face is. She’s looking almost totally straight forward with a slight head tilt, and yet her nose is all shoved to the side. It gets harder and harder to line these pics up the more she warps her face. I did this one based on her head size and lining up her nose position and lips. Girl, put the Facetune down!
Kim, I know times are tough, super sorry to hear about the divorce, but I really don’t want to know what kind of men you’ll attract with this smashed out head and face look you are going for. Maybe you could try just being yourself?
Images: Karwai Tang/Getty Images; kimkardashian, bellahadid / Instagram; Tenor
It would be an understatement to say that I am not impressed by Kyle Richards’ behavior as of late. I used to really like her—she was surprisingly down-to-earth, and I loved her relationship with Lisa Vanderpump and how much fun they would have. But I was super disappointed when she threw LVP under the bus, especially after what was going on with Lisa’s family. Like okay, you might be mad at her for something stupid, but if a friend is going through a major tragedy, you step the f*ck up for them. It really feels like the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast is so desperate for drama, they all just gang up on one person (usually the one they’re most jealous of) to bully them for ratings. I hope guys are real proud of yourselves for attacking Denise Richards, an actual celebrity, so people will watch your boring lives.
But that’s not why we’re here. We’re here because Kyle Richards is not only spreading lies all over your screens, but all over her Instagram page.
Kyle posted this, which, I have to say, it makes me really annoyed that we’re in the middle of a pandemic and celebrities are traveling all over. Do your part, sit in your huge mansion, and shut the f*ck up about it. If I can quarantine in my 500-square-foot apartment, you can stay home. But even more annoyingly, this picture is full of lies and deceit.
Kyle is pretty fit, you can tell, but when I saw this photo my eyes immediately when to her abs. It looks like she just airbrushed abs onto her body…? Now, there did used to be a thing where celebrities would spray tan abs on themselves, and this looks a lot like that. But something about it is even more unnatural, whether she messed with the contrast and lighting on the image or actually drew it on (from the looks of it, in MS Paint). The part that was the real giveaway that something seems off to me was that her abs seem to be avoiding her bag’s straps! They are completely parallel. That is A SUPER strange coincidence.
While I could give the benefit of the doubt on the abs, what gives it away are the walls. (It’s always the walls.) Now, this pic was taken in a mirror. You can see that she wasn’t holding the phone perfectly straight because the lines of the mirror are crooked. So, because it’s off-kilter, the walls will also be angled. That’s totally fine. HOWEVER, the lines of the walls themselves should always be straight, just at a slight diagonal. Are you following me? The walls themselves will not have any kind of bend to them. If they’re diagonal, they will be a straight diagonal.
BUT THEY ARE NOT, particularly near her stomach (interesting).
You can see the wall on the far left is angled but consistently straight. However, the wall closest to Kyle starts off angled-but-straight, but then is stretched/dipped out near Kyle’s stomach, hip, and thigh. I also circled that weird parallel section of her abs artwork. It looks like her abs and her bag are trying to social distance. Why do celebrities always have weird visual issues only around their stomachs and thighs? Quite the coincidence, wouldn’t you say? Especially because if we look on the other side of Kyle’s stomach, we can see that the rings around the large vase/pot get messed up right there as well. This is a round object. The rings should go around all the way around. Instead, they get completely blurred/smushed under Kyle’s elbow, and the second ring falls down.
Yeah, sorry, I’m not buying it. I don’t get why anyone does this. Also, Kyle is clearly in great shape! Here’s a more realistic stomach post from a few years ago. This one doesn’t look edited to me, doesn’t have airbrushed abs, and looks almost the exact same. You’ll notice that while the walls are angled from another mirror selfie, they are totally straight.
Cannot express this enough: GOODBYE, KYLE.
What do you guys think of Kyle’s airbrushed abs? Do you think it’s a pointless edit too? What are your feelings on Kyle in general? Are you as over watching Kyle on RHOBH as I am? LMK!
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Images: John Tsiavis / Bravo; kylerichards18 / Instagram; Giphy
Welcome to another day in quarantine, where every day is the exact same thing. Like that movie Palm Springs on Hulu (cannot recommend enough, BTW). In keeping with every single day being the exact same, guess what also hasn’t changed? Khloé Kardashian posted a face to Instagram that was definitely not her own.
But before we get to today’s aberration, I just want to point something else out. Remember a couple months ago when Khloé posted a *literally unbelievable* photo of “herself” aka the scary cyborg she morphs herself into via Facetune and claims is real life, and I broke it down for you? Amazingly, there were still some people that thought the photo was real life. Wellllll. Unfortunately, because Khloé seems to be unaware that she is extremely famous and on an extremely famous TV show, Keeping Up With The Kardashians themselves provided receipts for said photo.
S/O Dylan Hafer for the comparison and best commentary ever.
It turns out the only real thing about this photo was the boob highlight. Which hopefully if you’ve been reading these articles, you spotted from a mile away. Does she forget that she is ON TV and everyone knows exactly what her face looks like? This isn’t like models or influencers where the risk of us catching them in the wild is minimal. We see her real face every week on our TV screens!
It just could not be more different, these are not the same people?! Also, why is she removing her signature mole? But that’s not why we’re today, kids. Because yesterday, Khloé posted this.
WHO is this? What’s so weird is this isn’t even the same person in her other edited photos. Legitimately, every picture she edits completely differently which really sells herself out.
I cannot stress this enough, this looks nothing like her real life face OR her previously edited face. Her eyes are big and stretched out, her skin looks like plastic with no shape under her eyes, her nose is slimmed out, her face is angled into a point, and her neck has a strange bulge in it from trying to sharpen her jawline. And her face does not match the skin color on her hands AT ALL. I honestly would have no idea who this even is.
But don’t worry, we also got THIS today:
I would say this is maybe another angle of the chick from the last picture, but once again it does not match up. And it looks nothing like real life Khloé. I know the angle is different, but even still:
It’s not the same person. Her eyes are at least double the size, her nose is a totally different shape, her lips are enormous, she thinned her jaw and her neck, and even her eyebrow shape has changed. Once again, these features make you look LIKE YOU, you cannot just change them at random!
Here is my problem with this amount of editing. Khloé is beautiful on her own without it. Not to mention, although we hate to admit it, the Kar/Jenners are fashion/societal icons and, for a lot of people, role models. As problematic as they are, they’re a huge part in why being curvy came back into style—but then they consistently undo any positive influence they had on beauty standards when they perpetuate this scary cyborg puppet version of women as if that is what is or should be considered attractive. And the most toxic part is that, in actuality, they don’t even have it themselves and can only achieve these looks through plastic surgery, expensive treatments, and then polish it off with complete bullsh*t photo editing. It is the definition of toxic and I hope that one day Khloé will feel good enough about her REAL face and REAL body and REAL mole to truly own who she is. I’d way rather see Khloé be herself than continue to see these many changing faces and bodies that she thinks are cute but in real life are SCARY.
Do you guys agree that you’d rather see the real Khloé than these many edited versions of her? When does Facetune go too far to you? Why do you think people do this to their photos when we can easily provide receipts? LMK!
Images: Vivien Killilea/Getty Images for Abyss By Abby; dylanhafer, khloekardashian / Instagram
I’ve got to be honest with you guys. I don’t like EDM. I don’t even really remember what EDM stands for. I feel like EDM pretty much only has its place in clubs and music festivals, both of which I hate. I hate crowds, I hate being hot, I hate people bumping into me, and God help you all if I’m forced to deal with all three at the same time. Even if you like festivals, you have to admit they are the dirtiest. I also primarily listen to old rock music, and if it’s from the ’90s, I consider that “newer”. Soooo I’m not particularly attached to David Guetta, nor do I really know who he is, aside from hearing his name here and there. According to his Wikipedia page, he’s an EDM DJ and that is currently all I know about him. In general, I’m opposed to DJs, mostly because every guy I knew in college also thought he was a DJ, and most of them are total sh*tshows. But David Guetta seems to be a pretty big name and have his sh*t together.
So I know that, and I know that he’s in great shape according to his latest Instagram post.
And apparently he’s 52?! Good for him! He’s in better shape than the twentysomething guys I know (you know, the pretend DJs). Except, unfortunately, this photo is full of lies and deceit. Not because David Photoshopped on his abs (which I don’t think he did, although it is very easy to do), but instead of changing up his diet to look more trim, David decided to use a little app we know and despise called Facetune. How do I know this, you ask?
Well. It’s f*cking obvious, that’s how.
It’s either that, or he owns some very strange furniture that all seems to bend around his body? Maybe he gets it at the same place the Kardashians do? He is actually missing full chunks of arm and stomach on the left side (since it’s a mirror selfie)! Also on on the left, is that a piece of equipment, wall, or part of the mirror? Whatever it is, it was straight until it got near his shoulder, and then it bent. Also, what is going on with those equipment wires near his missing stomach chunk? They’re all broken up? And what’s with that poster behind him? It looks like only the letters near his shoulder are italicized (or just bent) and then it goes back to normal by the “E”.
But the worst is, of course, the right side with those shelves. They start off straight until they get near his body, and then the entire thing curves horribly. And at the SAME angles as his stomach, weirdly enough! He really does have his own Kardashian vortex.
What is the point of being completely ripped at 52 and taking a gym selfie if you’re going to Facetune yourself anyway? C’mon man, it’s more impressive when it’s your actual body! David, if you’re going to take a gym selfie, don’t insult our intelligence by editing your bod. I’m not saying this is EDM’s fault, but I am saying that I haven’t seen any rockstars do this. This just reestablishes what I already learned in college: you should not trust DJs! Or maybe just men?
Are you surprised to see that men use Facetune the same way women do? Did you notice that VERY few comments on David’s picture even noticed the mistake? Why do you think someone who’s clearly in awesome shape would even bother with something like this? Do you know any men who Facetune?
Images: davidguetta / Instagram
Breaking news: Kim Kardashian shocked everyone today by posting an insanely poorly edited picture of herself depicting an unattainable and unrealistic Photoshopped body type. I know. You can’t believe it. This is just so unlike her to perpetuate the toxic standard for women in today’s society and force regular people to enhance their own bodies in increasingly extreme ways to keep up. With all the good she’s been doing in the world, I really hope this one day spreads to a brand of feminism that does not include destroying little girls’ self-esteem around the world. Anyyyyway. Today, Kim’s post did more than just create unrealistic standards by having her waist size be literally 1/3 of her ass.
I mean, she did that too:
I’m sorry but no, this doesn’t even look real. Both pictures look like her waist has been completely scooped out. And the background near her waist in the second picture looks weirdly smudged. Also, in the first picture, her shadow does not match up AT ALL. But that’s not really why we’re here. We’re here because once again, Kim has created a completely ridiculous body for women to try to attain: now we have to have THREE hands to be sexy!
Did Kim K. go to the surgeon and get a third hand added to her body (wouldn’t put it past her, tbh)? Or is this just yet another Photoshop catastrophe? Who are you guys hiring to edit your photos? I don’t understand.
Because Kim has a very specific manicure for this photo:
Andddd yet. I count two hands up on the wall. And, as Instagram user @_madisonshelby pointed out to us, there’s also one hand in her hair.
Three. Three hands.
I mean. What the f*ck, guys?
The only way this happens is because the photo editors legit take apart their subject, piece by piece, like f*cking Hannibal Lecter. But instead of making a nice skin lamp, they then add back limbs and body parts in different positions to feel out what looks best. They then try to post it like this is actually their body type, when their waist was cut out like it was done with an ice cream scoop. That, and then they leave extra fingers around. Sloppy, sloppy work. Also, not the first time their editors have accidentally left them with extra limbs.
Guys, here’s a foolproof method to avoid this problem. I’m gonna tell you. Ready? Stop editing your bodies into pieces. That’s it, that’s the secret. It’s also way easier to just take flattering photos than to splice them up for zero (0) reason after the fact.
Kim, I promise you, no one will be shocked to find that your waist actually supports a rib cage IRL. That’s what we all assume (and really hope). That, and it’s perfectly okay to only have two hands. We promise.
In news of body positivity, did you guys see Chrissy Teigen’s recent bathing suit post and ensuing garbage drama? Chrissy—who was a swimsuit model, FYI, and has birthed two children, and looks amazing—posted a cute pic of her awesome body in a swimsuit. And people really commented saying that she isn’t curvy enough and looks like Spongebob.
don’t get too trapped pic.twitter.com/bLp3dlHzIg
— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) April 26, 2020
Which is not only completely f*cking rude, but it’s insane! It’s due to the toxic environment people like Kardashians and FaceTune-obsessed influencers have created for women that it’s no longer acceptable to have a real body type without waist-cinching, giant-ass surgery or editing. And Chrissy called people out on it:
Everyone used to….surgically enhanced curves. I’ve been a square my whole life and let me tell you, it’s paid off nicely in many ways! https://t.co/wuRwGof2sZ
— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) April 26, 2020
BTW, it’s because of these expectations that women feel forced to get crazy surgery and FaceTune their photos and cut them into pieces in the first place. As always, thanks for being real, Chrissy! We need heroes like you in these dark times.
Did you guys notice the extra fingers? Do you think it’s gross that every photoshoot of them seems to be cut up like this? Did you think Kim’s waist looks realistic or is it super obvious to you? LMK! Quick shoutout to @_madisonshelby on Instagram for this submission. I would have never spotted this right off the bat! Please submit your Photoshop detective work always!
Images: kimkardashian / Instagram; chrissyteigen / Twitter
It is Day 54 of quarantine. I haven’t showered in a super long time. I’ve read everything on Betches, AND Buzzfeed, AND all of my social media feeds. I’ve watched basically all of Netflix and settled on The Office yet again. Also, have you seen Never Have I Ever? It’s fantastic but needs like, 30 more episodes. Times are dark, guys. As I obsessively scroll Instagram for literally any *ANY* new information, I see a little something from our dear Photoshop Fail Friend, Kylie Jenner.
Now, Kylie has been in some hot water recently because she went out in public without her paid paparazzi, and the photos were very normal. I’m pretty confused as to why people were surprised by this. Guys, NO ONE is a 24/7 thirst trap. It takes a lot of makeup and posing to look like Kylie Jenner, and it sounds exhausting tbh. We’re all in quarantine anyway, let her buy her chips in peace.
The way that Quarantine has turned Kylie Jenner back into a white girl pic.twitter.com/FQjlTEY95F
— B. Velvet (@BeyonceLeague) April 20, 2020
If anything, I love this, because it shows what we’ve been saying with this article series all along: celebs, they’re just like us! And it takes a ton of Photoshop, Facetune, creative angles, and contours to look like a celeb.
Of course, Kyle couldn’t just let it go and be cool, and has been desperate ever since to remind us that she’s actually super hot when she tries. I think it would have been a way better power move to just let it be. But as a Kardashian/Jenner they always need to look supernatural, so she’s been posting pretty frequent thirst traps since.
So then she posted these:
She’s all, “Look at me, you poors! I am rich and thin and have a pool!” However, Kylie’s new house seems to have super f*cking weird pool.
Because in every photo, the structural integrity of the pool seems to completely fall apart whenever it’s near Kylie. Also known as the Kardashian Vortex.
Here’s the thing. Yes, water warps perspective, but it definitely does not warp the portion of the pool structure clearly OUT of the water. I thought these were pretty bad, guys. First, it gives me secondhand shame to picture Kylie posing all over her pool with probably her housekeeper taking 4,000 snapshots of her so she can prove she’s sexy to undo the chip pics. It’s just embarrassing. Like, enjoy your life and chill out. But it makes it even more embarrassing that she then painstakingly dragged her pics around in Facetune in order to get Barbie proportions and messed her pool up in the process. But then it gets worse.
Because this is actually her second post of said photoshoot. The first post included this image that was cropped differently:
Kylie you are the worst using photoshop pic.twitter.com/eoGOsG0BqA
— Leo (@wichocantu98) April 28, 2020
Where you can clearly see THERE IS A GIANT CHUNK missing from her pool, that also surrounds her ass. I mean, what the hell was she editing for this to happen?
So there you have it. At least Kylie’s grotesque editing of her body is the one constant in our lives in these uncertain times.
Did you notice Kylie’s messed up pool immediately? Are you now a pro at spotting these Fails now? What other Photoshop abuse have you seen lately? Do you agree that Kylie should be allowed to buy chips without having a posed photoshoot? LMK!
Images: kyliejenner / Instagram; beyonceleague, wichocantu98 / Twitter