Wearing leggings is pretty much the greatest experience in life, other than napping or being told that you’re pretty. They’re like, one of the very few things that betches don’t really complain about because they’re comfortable AF. You probably never thought that it would be possible to love leggings anymore than you already do, but if you start buying ones that are super flattering, you’ll reach a level of obsession that will probably piss everyone around you off. Here are the perfect patterned leggings to get for your body type.
Horizontal Stripes: Scam People Into Thinking Your Butt Is Huge
I personally know that horizontal stripes will make a flat ass look dope because every time I say “my butt actually looks like a butt today,” my friends tell me to shut up because it’s just my horizontally striped leggings. Honestly, if I had a dollar for every time that happened, I could finally afford butt implants. Please spare me the judgement and stop acting like you’d be above that. It’s a pretty well known fact that horizontal stripes make you look wider, so if you have an area of your body that you would like to have appear larger, they actually come in clutch.
Vertical Stripes: Make Your Legs Look Longer
In the same way that the insanely stupid nail contouring trend makes your short sucky nails look long (but still sucky), leggings with vertical stripes will make your legs look longer. However, unless you’re hoping to channel your inner Beetlejuice, I’d probs advise against leggings that have vertical stripes the whole way around. Instead, go for something that just has them down the side.
Large, Bold Patterns: Avoid Looking Lanky
If you have long, skinny legs and are worried about looking lanky (cry me a fucking river), the most flattering legging print for you is any large, bold pattern. It’ll basically break up the two mile stretch that is your legs.
Diagonal Panels: Play Up Curves
Anything with a diagonal vibe is ideal for flattering curves, because it will elongate but also enhance what ya mama gave ya. Because diagonal stripes aren’t really a popular pattern for leggings (unless you somehow grabbed a pair out of like, an elf costume or something), opt for leggings with diagonal panels.
Tiny Prints: Spark Rumors That You Have A Fake Butt
If your butt already looks like one of those rap guy’s girlfriends (oh my god, Becky), then you should go with something with a small print that will make people assume you’re wearing butt pads or something. Like seriously, you might end up having to get a butt x-ray to prove that it’s real, like Kim K did.