Marie Roda’s ‘Challenge: Final Reckoning’ Recap: Haters Will Say Cara Carried Me

In last night’s episode I made the final. I REPEAT, in last night’s episode, I MADE THE FINAL. Haters will say Cara carried me, and betches like me won’t care. WE MADE IT! There was a lot of missing information last night, and I’m here to answer all your questions. Well hopefully… I lost my laptop, drank four cups of coffee, and I’m currently writing this recap on my cell phone. This is how serious I am about the juice I’m about to share. When there’s a will, there’s a way.

We start off hot this episode, walking directly into a daily challenge. TJ tells us this season will have another Trivia, and being electrocuted will be the punishment of receiving an X, whether through your own wrong answer or the power one gets if they answer correctly. I’m ecstatic and I hope the viewers are too. Any challenge that keeps me grounded and removes physical endurance is right up my alley. I will get electrocuted all day every day over running a mile.

We start trivia off with a wrong answer by team #PaNatalie. When asked what a baker’s dozen was they answered “6.” As a bakery connoisseur myself, I was personally offended by the answer. I also believe all bakeries need to up their “baker’s dozen” with a surprise +2. Just saying.  Everyone loves surprises.

Ashley and Hunter get the answer correct to “what female artist has sold the most records” with “Madonna” and I’m not surprised. I can see Hunter dancing around in his briefs to “Material Girl” easily, of course he’d know. I was surprised however, that Ashley and Hunter threw their X at me and Cara. Getting electrocuted hurts. Don’t let my smile fool you. It’s what I do when I’m nervous, I smile. Smiling out of turn actually got me kicked off of my soccer team once. True story. Can’t help it.

Cara and I have a decent run with our trivia questions thanks to my brain, which is lightyears above kindergarteners’. Almost nailed it, Ri. Almost. TJ throws out a few trick questions before stumping me and Cara with “what side of the road do Canadians drive on?” We were truly confident this was a trick question. It’s not like there weren’t a few before and after. Naturally, overthinking killed my brain cells and we inevitably end up losing as other teams send us through the electric curtains like it’s showtime. Joke’s on them, it’s always showtime for #caramarie.

Other quick things to note in trivia: Ashley is hilarious. Hate her or love her, she’s TV gold. She and Hunter are a disaster waiting to happen. Sidenote, she’s pretty smart too. Never underestimate Smash’s mind. Never.

Paulie has become my favorite character as a viewer. After myself, of course. I can’t even explain it, and perhaps I’m just reluctant to give him the full credit he deserves… but I’m rooting for him as a fan. As a challenger, ERRR… stay tuned for next week. LOL Joss and Sylvia win another daily, and #PaNatalie have identified themselves as a true floater.

We went out later that night against my will. I remember not feeling well and having a PA ask why. I don’t know, maybe because you electrocuted me today!!? Talk about one pissed off electrocuted woman. Poor girl… and then I wonder why I get the edit I do.

Anyway, this is where a plan was hatched between Sylvia, Ashley, and myself to get an elimination between Banony and Panatalie. We knew they were the teams to beat, so first let them beat each other. It was a shot in the dark, but it went down flawlessly, and production decided not to show it. Ahem.

How Rude

Joss and Sylvia are safe. This means the remaining teams have three different options as to where to place their vote.

Considering our history, and the high stakes of the elimination, we devised a plan that would hopefully leave Panatalie and Banony with only 2 reasonable options instead of 3.

Taking note from Kam’s plan, Sylvia, Ashley, and I devised one ourselves to make everyone else think the LL’s were voting for me and Cara. This was done by both staging a loud argument back at the house, and convincing everyone else that they were going to band together against me and Cara, like they had done in the past with John. Convincing everyone included our own partners. I had a hearty laugh when they made it seem like TYB had any role in this. Typical.

The scene with Natalie, Cara, and me was all part of the plan. I needed to convince Natalie that the votes were going our way. That crying session was totally fake. Any person watching it should be able to tell. You know a real Marie cry when you see one. I promise. #dramatic We were never on Natalie’s radar, although they’d like to make you think so. Capitalizing on the fact that everyone truly believed we were going in, I told Johnny that our vote was going to Ashley and Hunter. Ashley, Sylvia, and I knew Joss and Sylvia would put their vote on Banony.

What this means for BaNony:

Vote Paulie/Natalie or Ashley/Hunter assuming with great knowledge they won’t vote us. If they vote PaNatalie and SLOSS put their vote there, PaNatalie goes in. If they vote Ashley/Hunter and so do Cara and I (as we said we would) Ashley and Hunter would go in and they made it known they’d choose us.

What this means for PaNatalie: know they will not vote us in. They have two options, Banony or Ashley and Hunter. They are convinced no votes are going to John and all are going to me. Nat has become very close to Hunter in this short time, and I’m aware. She won’t say his name and is considering the potential equalizer of going against a male/male team in an elimination. She made it clear she was playing an honest game… and I took advantage of that.

What this means for Cara and me:

  1. A) Vote Ashley Hunter, with the risk they get the most votes because “if you trust Johnny you’re stupid,” as you saw me say in the nomination room.
  2. B) Vote John knowing 2 votes were going their way from SLOSS. Stupid OR
  3. C) Vote PaNatalie. If we vote Ashley and Hunter and John puts his vote there, the votes could die, and Cara and I are at risk no matter what. Vote PaNatalie, and risk going in BUT with the comfort in thinking they’d say our name over John’s. Which is exactly why Cara and I voted for PaNatalie and apologized to them right after. “We are SO sorry.” 😉

We learned later PaNatalie did indeed vote for John and Sylvia and I did a happy dance in the kitchen. There’s a reason my face has such a smirk in elimination. There’s also a reason BaNony wasn’t voting for anyone. They knew what we did. They knew what I did.

Kim Kardashian Smile

Originally we showed up to elimination where broken contraption sent us back home after the teams ate a bunch of stuff due to fairness. In all fairness, it wasn’t fair… but had the Challenge gods gotten their way, Johnny and Tony were making it to the final… and most likely winning. Rivals 2 pt. 2? I think not!

The next night we returned, and a new battle was set up. This one on a much more level playing field. Props to both teams as I could not imagine enduring what both of them did. Natalie out-spites John, and PaNatalie are the greatest redemption story production could ask for.

We end the episode as the remaining teams meet TJ at the begging of the final. Here he lets us know the rules of the game and the potential f*ckery that could occur. Next week’s episode will be the most entertaining final in history.

Lastly, I feel compelled to share this information as I have a very strong feeling I will be made to look like a goon next week. Upon learning that I made the final, I was overwhelmed with excitement. Due to my excitement I had to tinkle and ventured off to the nearest port-a-potty in the pitch dark. After finishing my victory whiz, I walked out of the toilet and rolled my ankle in a dark hole. Know that going into next week this will not be shown.. and know that next week I will be cursing the grounds that I walk on.

Ps. If you think I’d let Paulie and Cara get away with their shenanigans and NOT say something, you’re dead wrong. Next week, join me, in the season finale, in which I own, and then burn to the ground.


Images: MTV; Giphy (3)

Marie Roda’s ‘Challenge: Final Reckoning’ Recap: Who Run The World? Girls

On last week’s episode, Team Banony was eliminated by Sylvia and Joss and ShaNelly was eliminated by, well, ShaNelly. After taking the lead on the Lavender Lady mission to get John out, it was a blessing to see them sent to Redemption. I swear you can’t write this sh*t.

For the first time this season, I’m excited to see ShaNelly walk into KamLeigh’s room after their purge loss. Nelson was probs crying the entire ride there, why else would he wear sunglasses inside? Kay is reluctant to give Nelly a hug because of the tea John spilled to her about his relationship with Natalie.

Let’s get real here for a sec, John’s information wasn’t completely off. Any decently smart viewer would suspect that after Natalie expressed how much she loves Nelson, sh*t would go down between them. Considering #PaNatalie spent the entire game in Redemption, I’m wondering when and where they became besties. Bottom line is, if Nelson was my BF (God strike me dead) and I saw him getting way too cozy with Natalie, he’d no longer be my boyfriend. And Natalie’s chin wouldn’t be the only f*cked up thing on her face. Just kidding. Sort of.

Next, John finds out about ShaNelly’s elimination. It’s like Christmas came early for him. Also, I’m not sure what it is about the guys wearing snowcaps in the house this season, but I’m not mad. Johnny is looking real good. Maybe it’s him, or maybe it’s the fact that I don’t sleep anymore. Either way, if this were a “who wore it best” contest, John’s got this in the bag and Nelson is still looking for his purse.

Then Shane claims his loss to Bananas was the worst loss in Challenge history. Alexa, play that episode from Vendettas where I got sent home stuck in a basket. Don’t steal my thunder, SHANE.

The male-male teams are all bumping chests and laughing about the fact that Shane and Nelson are in Redemption with them. Outside, we see Shane chain-smoking cigarettes. That’s when Johnny pops his head out from the upstairs window. I love this moment. Not only because it reminds me of a breakup I once had, but also because Shane shows he’s as pathetically petty as I am. This moment is wrapped up with a beautiful quote from Shane stating, “I’m like a weed, I thrive on things that kill normal people.” OKAY SAME.

After, Nelson and Kayleigh talk on the side of the house and decide to make up. Kayleigh says she’s fallen for him. I think I literally choked on my own laughter. Kayleigh “falls” even quicker than I do, which is actually quite impressive considering my fall time is unbeatable. I still can’t believe she’s romantically attracted to Nelson. To each their own, I guess.

Shane and Nelson continue to take the heat from a newly revived John, and I LOVE IT. Tony asks Nelson, “you know how good I am now? What have you done?” This is giving me hope for my own Challenge glow-up. If Tony can have a comeback, anyone can.

At the main house, Natalie reads the clue to everyone except for Cara and me because we were in interviews. Team LL and PaNatalie really want Nelson and Shane to come back. You can bet Cara and I will definitely not be jumping on that bandwagon. As friends, and for the sake of our position in this game, we really need KamLeigh and Banony to come back. Sidenote: Cara looks cute in pigtails.

Now it’s time to pull the double-cross. TJ has room for four riders today, that means everyone gets a chance. BTW, can we drop this weird horseman apocalypse lingo? Kyle’s great at pulling the double-cross, but he’s total sh*t at eliminations. Kyle cracks me up.

At Armageddon, TJ lets us know that REDEMPTION IS OFFICIALLY CLOSED! Tonight, everyone is playing and two teams are coming back. Kyle and Brad pull the first double-cross and decide to pick KamLeigh. Everyone wants to see ShaNelly versus Banony, so this was an obvious choice. I’m praying that Kam and Kayleigh can pull through and win. If they do, TWO male-male teams are going home. Production did not see this coming. Their chances at having new champions to add to their register is dwindling. I’m not mad.

First up is KamLeigh versus Kyle and Brad. This elimination is one that involves brainpower (the ability to solve simple grade-school math) and strength. The teams strategize who should be climbing versus who should be doing the math. Brad shares that he’s taught several math classes, but decides to be the climber anyway. Wait. What? LOL.

TJ blows the horn and we immediately see the difference in teams strategies. Kam decides to do her math on the ground, while Kyle and Brad use the board as draft paper. I see Banony helping with Kyle and Brad’s math equations and decide if he’s doing it, so am I. Difference is, I’m out here for KamLeigh. I post up on the men’s side and scream as loudly as possible to cause some distractions. I like to think I was a big part in KamLeigh’s win, but they’re just too good.

What you don’t see in these scenes is that the boys rung the bell numerous times even though their math was wrong. Every time they’d ring, Kayleigh was taken down from her climb. Because they did this so many f*cking times, Kayleigh kept having to climb and was exhausted. Totally unfair.

Finally, after lots of arguing, they let Kayleigh remain on the board while they checked Brad and Kyle’s math. And guess what? The girls took it home! Brad gives props to the ladies as he leaves the game. I’m low-key sort of sad. No more iconic lines from Brad the dad. We’ll miss you buddy.

Next up, the battle everyone has been waiting for, Banony versus ShaNelly. For their task, they must use a cylinder shaped object to try and push each other out of a ring. I’m excited. Tony alone would be able to push both Shane and Nelson out. Which proves my point: you can be as fit as you want but sometimes it just comes down to pure size… and that’s why I eat fries.

Banony wins and we’ve got the band back together. I’m skeptical of trusting PaNatalie but also fearful of seeing Tony and Bananas in the final. Things should get interesting. The closer we get to the end, the bigger the target on mine and Cara’s back grows.

We welcome our old friends into the house and get the news that a challenge will be taking place tomorrow. At this point in the game, we’ve all basically figured out the schedule: purges always follow eliminations. It’s no secret that this season has been completely unfair for the girl-girl teams, and having a purge is terrible news for us.

We get to the challenge and find out we’ll be pushing a massive rock. TJ gives us two options: either push through the ditch, which is more difficult but a closer distance, or around the ditch, which is easier but further.

The rocks are heavy AF but each was weighted equally to match the competitors’ size. Finally, something equal in this game. I’m really over them going back and forth on their decision to use equalizers. It totally screws your game up when you assume they’ll be given, like say if Cara and I went against Shane and Nelson in a physical fight. Oh, wait.

Sadly, Kam and Kayleigh lose and somehow Cara and I are able to overcome another purge. We might be second to last, but alive nonetheless. Yet again, they make it look like Cara was the only one pushing this boulder. Listen, Cara, I’m all about the girl power, but you do know I exist, right? Cool.

Having Kam and Kayleigh leave is sad. Not only because they’re my girls, but because they have put up one hell of a fight this season. These bad b*tches took their loss with grace. Kam says she’s out to win the next one, and I believe her. Here’s hoping my girl pulls through. DRINKS ON YOU!

Next week we’re down to five teams. There are no more lifesavers. If you lose, you go home. Here’s hoping I get the credit I deserve next week. If not, I’ll be sure to write about it here. HAPPY WEDNESDAY!



Images: MTV (5); Giphy (1)

Marie Roda’s ‘Challenge: Final Reckoning’ Recap: Here Is The Truth

In last week’s recap, I apologized to The Challenge editing team. This week, I take it back. F*ck you. Last night’s episode was shocking for more than one reason. Not only did we get an elimination that was completely unexpected, but we also got another episode edit that made literally no sense. I’m beginning to wonder if John puts these things together himself. Luckily I have been granted the opportunity to write this recap and let everyone know the TRUTH about what really went on.

Before we jump into this week, let’s recap last week: Kyle and Brad got eliminated and were sent to Redemption, where an underwhelming meet-and-greet with their enemy Paulie wasted five minutes of my life. Zach and Amanda embarrassed everyone with how quickly they took the day’s W. I was the only cast member to actually build a makeshift stick out of twigs because my partner has lost complete sight of the game.

This week we pick up right where we left off. Zach and Amanda need to decide where to place their power vote. While winning is a great way to NEVER get eliminated (or so we thought) Amanda lets us know that her win is bittersweet as she and Zach can’t seem to get on the same page. Outside Zach is b*tching about Amanda and the fact that he always gets paired with girl rivals. Here’s a thought, Zach: maybe stop arguing with only female players and perhaps your luck will change. Nelson tells Zach that he wants to get Bananas out, and Zach begins to cry at the thought of losing his BFF Tony.

Ah, bromance.

At this point in the game, Jozea and Davonne need to pick a side. The power of their rogue vote has come to an end. Cara tells them that’s a good place to be as the two main alliances begin to attempt wooing them to their side. Cara was made aware by ME, her partner, that the LL’s had plans to align their votes and come for the king of fruit, Bananas. But this wasn’t always the plan. In fact, it was my actions that forced their decision to do so… but we’ll get to that later.

Apparently, that makeshift stick of twigs I made last week is also up an editor’s ass this season as they begin to paint the idea that John was the mastermind behind this week’s nomination choices. I wonder if they too have a lackluster sex tape with John. The sun goes down and Banony invites Cara for a jog outside. I wasn’t invited to this pow-wow because a) Johnny thinks I’m a double agent (which was true), and b) I never agree to a late-night jog session or jog in general ever.

Bananas knows he has no friends and needs to rally some votes to keep him out of elimination. He suggests to Cara that we should vote for Shanelly, but she lets him know I’d never say Shane’s name (unless of course we had agreed to it for our benefit *See most nomination burns for reference.*) I like that she finally acknowledges here that in order to do anything in this game she’s going to need my help. Except for playing with her hair… I’d never touch that. They agree to vote for Ashley and Hunter, and we head over to the Redemption house where Kyle and Paulie share a space other than Cara’s vagina.

Upstairs in the Redemption house, we get what I feel should be the biggest takeaway from the episode, the importance of eyebrows. Kam agrees that Kayleigh’s eyebrows are Insta-worthy and I bet, like myself, you’re all wishing you were blessed with stunning eyebrows as well. If, like me, your eyebrow game isn’t strong, and your ability to fake them with makeup is even worse… I highly suggest googling microblading. Life. Changing.

Downstairs we finally get the interaction between Kyle and Paulie we deserve. Last week, Paulie decided it’s best to play cool with Kyle, but now he’s had a change of heart. Paulie lets everyone know that he should’ve come into the game single and f*cked Cara. We all know if you keep up with this show outside of just the show in any regard, that at the end that didn’t matter regardless. Paulie explains that he didn’t realize Kyle had feelings for Cara since he was getting wet with Faith in the hot tub day one. Kyle thinks Paulie is a sheep and that his ex-girlfriend is f*ckable. I laugh.

I laugh harder when Paulie says that if things were to get physical between the two, Kyle would end up looking like his pre-surgery self. Who says girls can only start drama? While I never condone violence, I definitely crossed my fingers hoping these two would hit each other. Sidenote: Why does Kyle always squeak when he’s trying to be a tough guy? Classic “I’m a lover, not a fighter” reaction. They both deserve a good spanking. Where’s Cara when you need her?

At the main house, Nelson puts on his thinking cap and approaches Da’Vonne in the bedroom. Shoutout to lil’ momma for coining the term “mental bum” during Champs V. Stars, because that’s exactly what Nelson is. Apparently, Day and Nelson went to the same school, but I find that hard to believe considering the massive difference between their intelligence. Nelson provides me with another hilarious #OOTD in his leather jacket. Nelson has no clue about the temperature in this house, literally and figuratively.

In the living room, John attempts to gain the support of #TeamBB. If he is able to rally three votes, he believes HE can force a tie scenario in elimination. With Zach in the power seat, John knows that this is his safest bet. John lets Da’Vonne and Jozea know he’s on a “need to know basis” and the following information is something that I believe the audience NEEDS TO KNOW:

After the daily challenge, I was made aware by Hunter that if I voted him in, he would choose Cara and me. For someone who barks big in the interviews they show about coming for Bananas, this was never the case. By continuing my relationship with the LL’s I knew that their votes were not all aligned in the beginning as their original plan was to go after me and Cara.

Shane, being my bestie, would not agree with this move. Had the team stuck to this plan, The votes would have fallen 3-2. If this went down, Ashley and Hunter would receive the most votes and Cara and I would definitely face them in elimination. Being privy to both sides of the spectrum, and the idea that the LL’s thought our side was coming for Shane, I let Ashley know that the plan had changed and they would be the team we targeted. By doing so, I brought out Paranoid Pam in Ashley. She rallied her troops as expected to come together as one and vote for Banony.

Nobody wants to knowingly go into elimination, even if it’s against me and Cara. I knew that if Ashley got the majority of the votes, Cara and I were going in. I also knew that if we could somehow force a tie, the decision would come down to Zach and Amanda. Both of whom had made it clear to everyone that they would not back down to each other’s wishes. We didn’t know what would happen if the power team could not come to a decision… but a 50/50 chance of going in was way better odds.

Another thing to point out was that Da’Vonne was on board with this plan from the very beginning. She had no reason to align with the LL’s pecking orders. They’ve been the the ones who’ve attempted to take her out. The girl isn’t stupid. By her going to Ashley and letting her THINK she was on board with their plan to vote in John, she made the LL’s more confident to follow through. They assumed Bananas would take a safe bet going against #TeamBB if voted into elimination.

It’s the night before nominations and Amanda and Zach still can’t seem to get on the same page. Tony says tomorrow’s elimination will show everyone’s cards—and it will. Zach is 1,000 percent positive that Tony will never say his name. He lets Amanda and Ashley know he’d put his entire bank account on that. I die from laughter when Ashley says “What, all two dollars?” and the camera zooms in on her ripping her cig.

Bananas thinks Amanda is the spawn of Satan because she’s calling him on his bullsh*t. Zach reminds her that she might be Satan since she hoped Cara’s horse died. Amanda replies with “At least I didn’t wish for her to die,” and she has a point. Amanda is a whole mood this episode. She tells Zach to stop acting like a “bad b*tch.” Hate her or love her… I LOVE HER.

At Armageddon, the votes fall as planned. Zach and Amanda must chose between Banony and Hunter and Ashley. After a snippy back-and-forth, TJ tells them if they can’t decide on who goes in, they’re going in. Zach unzips his jacket and walks down. I am Sylvia when they show her say “WHAT” in slow motion. I am also myself when I laugh in shock at the fact that this just happened. This couldn’t have gone any better for me and Cara.

Since Amanda and Zach were supposed to be safe, they now have to choose who will face them in elimination. Amanda is in shock that she has to play in street clothes just because Zach has one friend in life other than Jenna. They decide to chose Da’Vonne and Jozea. Day lets us all know exactly how she feels, especially towards Ashley and Hunter who are “b*tches.” I’m #TEAMDAY here. I really needed her to pull out this upset.

Just when we think we’re about to see a BB vs. Zach/Amanda elimination, TJ calls out a pair of new mercenaries, Devin and Cory. While I never hate some good eye candy, this team will in no way benefit my game. They both adamantly hate John, and by default, Cara as well. Devin is here to remind Bananas why he’s a piece of sh*t human. Cory is here to take home that money to his baby, Ryder. PS: Cory has now joined the Teen Mom family on MTV and I couldn’t be more excited to stalk their adorable little family on social media.

Devin and Corey

Both Team Day and Zach/Amanda lose to Cory and Devin and this is HUGE. Had they come together as a team and made a decision, I’d bet my entire bank account (that may or may not be two dollars) that after this weekend’s festivities, Zach and Amanda were going to win this entire thing.

Next week find out what happens when the target readjusts to #TeamCaraMarie. I’ve been told this episode will be the greatest episode in recent seasons. Get ready for some badass Marie moments, and a good old-fashioned head-butt.

What did you think of this week’s INSANE elimination results?

Images: MTV (8); Giphy (1)

Marie Roda’s ‘Challenge: Final Reckoning’ Recap: Paulie’s A Loser

First and foremost: THANK YOU. Last week I wrote my first Challenge recap for Betches, and the feedback was great! This week, I realize I’m a complete narcissist as I want nothing to do with this recap because, well, 1) I wasn’t in the episode, and 2) I went on a real bender this weekend. So while I nurse myself back to life with a Pedialite in hand, let’s dive into The Challenge: Final Reckoning episode 4…“The Affair.”

We begin the episode with a reminder of how lame Kyle has been acting and continues to act over the Cara/Paulie love triangle. Paulie was eliminated last week by #TeamKK, but apparently that wasn’t enough to rid us of this storyline. As a viewer, the more people hate Paulie in the house, the more I like him. This is standard of me if you know any of my previous/current love interests.

PaNatalie arrive at Redemption and they are PUMPED. Not only are they not out of the game, but they’ve been reunited with their besties from Big Brother. They quickly recap the elimination drama and Paulie relays that it was the Kyle/Cara situation that got them voted in. TBH it was more so the distaste for your partner, Natalie, by the majority of the house… but let’s keep this story line dragging another episode. It’s not like there aren’t 209023840234 other things we could be seeing right now. Davonne wonders why Paulie is creating enemies, but HEY, if there’s one sure way to get another Challenge call… that’s it.

*** And NO, CARA, I got the call way before I hated you. ***


At the main house, we are introduced to what hopefully will be a recurring accessory this season, Shane’s hair helmet.

Apparently Shane went off the deep end after Kyle implied that Shane may ALSO need hair plugs before purchasing this robo-cap. Brad asks the burning question, “You got headphones in that thing too?” But the helmet only plays music when connected to the OLD iPod. Here’s hoping Shane gets #UPGRADED to a bluetooth functional helmet after this episode airs.

After a full night of arguing, and Britni reassuring the other Redemption housemates that she still is, in fact, psycho for her ex-boyfriend, Chuck decides it’s time to make nice with his former fling. This makes Brit happy because she just wants to “be his friend again,” and by friend she means “one whom she occasionally swaps bodily fluids with.”

During a serious teeth cleaning (for real, I was impressed by his brushing skills), Paulie realizes Brit still loves Chuck and that he could use this information to help better his game. This is a good idea, Paulie needs all the help he can get right now… minus a cavity search. He proceeds to tell Brit/Chuck that he’s going to tell the house that they’ve been sleeping with each other, and I’m surprised Brit doesn’t flip out… most likely because she too wishes this into existence. #Memories

Serious girl chat is taking place between Kayleigh, Bananas, Zach, and CT at the main house. Kayleigh recaps why she and Nelson had a falling out while the boys enlighten us on different slang words for “vagina.” I have personally never heard “fur burger” as a vagina reference before, but I hope to never hear it again.

Fast forward to a heart-to-heart between Zach and Nelson, and I think my eyes are permanently stuck from rolling so hard. In brief, Zach tells Nelson that in order to have a working relationship on the show, Nelson needs to find himself a “Jenna.” AKA Nelson needs to find a girl who loves him SO MUCH that she will put up with any and all f*ckboy stuff he does. I have a feeling Jenna and Kayleigh can’t relate in this sense, and therefore, neither do Nelson and Zach. NEXT!

In the living room, Shane confronts Johnny about voting him and Nelson in. Johnny retaliates by telling Shane he doesn’t know how to “play the game,” BUT Shane clearly knows how to count, so…? Shut up, John. Where’s Angela to save his storyline when we need her?

At this point I’ve been scrolling Instagram so deeply that I’ve forgotten what I’m supposed to be doing. A Bruno Mars song brings me back to life as we get a BanAngela scene. While Johnny lathers Ang in baby oil, the cast gives their two cents on this budding new relationship. Kam lets everyone know that Angela has a boyfriend at home and should be focusing on her female relationships in the house instead of a fruit. I don’t have much to say about this, BUT I CANNOT wait for the Twitter drama/Youtube recaps this segment will be sure to produce.


We get a glimpse into the dynamic of another house relationship between Kay and Nelson. Kayleigh is ME, and most likely you, when she tells Nelson that she said, and will continue to say, mean things about her ex because he hurt her. BTW: My ex definitely has herpes. Just saying.

At Redemption, life is hard. Britni still hasn’t found pants and can’t pop a pimple on her chest. Jenna then gets a clue from TJ saying “it’s time to see who’s going to be playing in the four horseman of the apocalypse.” I’m not sure why they chose to run with the “Horseman” thing, but it’s weird.

We get a double-cross situation that will allow the team who chooses it to pick their opponent, and I AM PISSED. WHY DID BB pick first?! My dreams of a full Jemmye-driven interview season is slowly dwindling before my eyes.

***Insider info: After this double-cross took place, the rules were changed in terms of picking order***

At Armageddon, the main house and Redemption house are rejoined while TJ explains the double-cross rules. Paulie explains that since he can’t get at Zach and Brad, he will instead go after “their girls.” Amanda calls Paulie a loser in her interview, and I think so too. Clearly you stuck with Big Brother because you’re from….. Big Brother… but keep making everyone in the house hate you.

The Challenge: Final Reckoning Episode 4

Yada yada yada … Paulie talks a big game and AGAIN can’t back it up in elimination. Natalie and Paulie lose and are sent BACK to the Redemption house while Jozea/Davonne rejoin the main house. Here’s hoping Day brings those FIRE interviews with her!!

Before I close out this recap, I have an important message to the fans. I know things may have been moving slow in terms of gameplay and a lot of people have complained about the drama thus far—but I promise we are finally where we need to be. NEXT WEEK, The Challenge we all know and love is back with a VENGEANCE!!

Tune in next week to The Challenge: Final Reckoning on Tuesday 9/8c on MTV!

Images: MTV (2); Giphy 2)