As a dedicated follower of Bella Thorne’s crazy life, I don’t like to go too long without writing about her. Luckily, the drama in her world basically never stops, and here we are again. Bella Thorne and Mod Sun broke up earlier this year (the smell is still lingering), but her Instagram announcing the split made it seem like things ended on good terms. Alas, all good things must come to an end. Now Bella and Mod are feuding on Twitter, and this is one of the most important things that’s ever happened to me.
It all began on Tuesday night, when Mod Sun spoke to TooFab. He told them that things are going great for him and he’s 17 days sober, which is amazing, but then he kinda ruined the good vibes by talking about Bella Thorne. He said that a bunch of her stuff is still in his storage unit, and if she doesn’t come pick it up soon, he’s “gonna have a really, really poppin’ e-Bay site.” Yikes. He didn’t help matters when he posted the story on his own Twitter page:
Obviously joking but I’m kinda funny tho ? https://t.co/S3MmesPz9k
— new song out now (@MODSUN) May 29, 2019
Okay, so I don’t really doubt that he was joking. It would be pretty sh*tty of anyone to sell their ex’s stuff on eBay, and the fact that she’s famous would only make it worse. But that’s the exact reason why he shouldn’t even be joking about this. He knows that Bella Thorne is way more famous than him, so if he brings her up when talking to the tabloids, he’s bound to get some attention. It would be just as easy for him to say “no comment” and move on.
Bella Thorne had pretty much exactly the same thought, and brought some serious tea when she called Mod out on Twitter.
— BITCHIMBELLATHORNE (@bellathorne) May 29, 2019
In case she deletes this, here’s what the tweet says: “Awww looks like moddy really wants some press. #hungry also didn’t u call the cops on me when I wanted my computer? U pussy.”
Let’s all take a minute to process this beautiful, beautiful tweet. This is a savage move on Bella’s part, and I honestly love it. These two obviously both have their fair share of issues, but I will always support a woman calling out a man’s bullsh*t. But then Mod Sun responded, suggesting that Bella may have left some important details out of her clap back.
Well u came over uninvited. 24 hours after we broke up, Thru the backdoor. I wasn’t at the house to see what u were gonna take + to be honest bella…ur not the most trustworthy person. I’ve also told u 6 times since let’s SWAP each other’s stuff but which u refuse to gather mine
— new song out now (@MODSUN) May 29, 2019
Here’s the tweet, again, in case it gets deleted: “Well u came over uninvited. 24 hours after we broke up, Thru the backdoor. I wasn’t at the house to see what u were gonna take + to be honest bella…ur not the most trustworthy person. I’ve also told u 6 times since let’s SWAP each other’s stuff but which u refuse to gather mine”
Oof. I’m not going to try to figure out who’s telling the truth re: coming over to pick up the computer, but this is undeniably messy. It also makes me seriously question Bella’s breakup Instagram that made it seem like they were still friends, because generally speaking, friends don’t call the cops on each other. Or tweet about each other’s dirty laundry.
I’m also enjoying the mental image of Bella Thorne refusing to put together a bin of Mod Sun’s stuff at her h0use after him asking six times, especially when she could literally just pay someone to do it. I would sign up to be a Taskrabbit and fly all the way to LA if it meant I could spend a few hours in Bella Thorne’s house putting Mod Sun’s dirty underwear into a trash bag. SIGN ME UP.
Obviously, Bella and Mod have their issues that they need to work out, but doing things publicly on Twitter invites a lot of outside opinions. Enter: Tana Mongeau, YouTube’s resident thirst master general, and Bella’s ex-girlfriend. I’ll never 100% understand the dynamics between Tana, Mod, and Bella Thorne, but it’s 0% surprising that Tana felt the need to insert herself in this drama.
the love u have for eachother to take this to socials and press legit breaks my heart y’all
— ‘FACETIME’ MUSIC VIDEO OUT NOW (@tanamongeau) May 30, 2019
First, let’s take a moment to admire that BOTH of them have currently changed their Twitter names to promo for their new songs. It’s really a beautiful symbol of the what the internet is like in 2019. I don’t really have much to say about Tana’s message, because it really adds nothing to the conversation here. If anything, if she really was legit heartbroken over this, couldn’t she have texted/called/written a letter to Bella and/or Mod privately? Maybe she’s blocked, but it doesn’t seem like she’s really trying to calm things down.
This feud is the only thing getting me through today, so I’ll be eagerly waiting for more shady tweets from Bella Thorne and/or Mod Sun and/or Tana Mongeau. I live for these creatures of the internet, and they’ll really never stop being messy. God bless.
Images: Shutterstock; @modsun (2), @bellathorne, @tanamongeau / Twitter
Bella Thorne has spent her whole career breaking boundaries and surprising us, like last week, when we found out she’s publishing a book of poems. But today, we gather to talk about Bella Thorne for a less happy reason—Bella and Mod Sun broke up. That’s right, the grungiest couple the world has ever seen is no longer. Pour out a bottle of the cheapest vodka you can find, because this is the saddest news I’ve heard all week.
Luckily, Bella did us all a favor and confirmed the news on her Instagram, so we don’t have to wonder whether rumors about the split are real. In true Bella Thorne style, the post is instantly iconic. It’s a mirror selfie of her wearing a dress with a large boob window, and then Mod Sun is just kinda lurking in the background. Honestly, this seems on par with what I know of his personal brand. I don’t know what the usual etiquette is for a breakup Insta, but Bella Thorne is a queen and I’m living for this photo.
Bella’s caption isn’t especially noteworthy, aside from the fact that it’s confirmation that she and Mod are no longer together. With a post like this, it seems like the breakup must have been pretty amicable, otherwise we would’ve just gotten a lot of moody subtweets and confusing outfits. I mean, Bella will still probably do that stuff, but it seems like things ended on at least decent terms.
To put things into perspective, Bella Thorne’s split with Mod Sun comes less than two months after her split with Tana Mongeau, so it must be a tough time for her. I’ve never thought about it this way, but I guess this is the biggest hazard of getting into a throuple in the first place. One breakup is bad enough, but two just seems unfair. The only way this could get worse for Bella is if Mod Sun and Tana start dating each other separately, but I think we’re safe for now.
Before posting her breakup Insta, Bella also shared this photo from Coachella, so we all knew something was up. Captioning an Instagram “Hug me I’m lonely” is basically a plea for random dudes to slide into your DMs, so I’m sure Bella already has plenty of eligible men in need of a shower knocking on her door.
If I start using captions like these, will I finally be able to find a sugar daddy? Bella, lmk what kind of responses you get so I can assess my options. Seriously, I hope Bella’s doing well, because it’s obviously sh*tty to go through two breakups in such a short amount of time. Maybe I’ll show my support by preordering that poetry book. No, I definitely won’t, but I’ll at least stream “Bitch I’m Bella Thorne” a few times on Spotify. It’s the least I can do.
Images: Shutterstock; @bellathorne / Instagram (2)
I have some bad news for you, readers. Bella Thorne and her girlfriend Tana Mongeau have broken up. But I also have some good news for you. Bella Thorne and Mod Sun are still together! Wait…what? I know. We are living in confusing times. The Jonas Brothers have a new song, Jordyn Woods betrayed her gravy train the Kardashians, Bradley Cooper didn’t win an Oscar, sh*t is just weird. But it’s true. It turns out that Bella Thorne was a member of a throuple that has now, sadly, just become a couple, and I have questions. And lucky for you I also have a varying degree of correct answers that correlate directly to how much wine is left in my bottle. Let’s begin!
Tana and I aren’t together anymore, pls stop asking. We love U guys ❤️
— BITCHIMBELLATHORNE (@bellathorne) February 26, 2019
First of all, who is Tana Mongeau? And why did I, an active follower of Bella’s Instagram account, not realize she existed? My close friend Wikipedia tells me that Tana is an “American internet personality and rapper.” Oh boy. The only other words I hate to read next to each more than those are “mandatory” and “gynecological exam”. Tana also may be a scam artist, having attempted to host a convention called TanaCon which she canceled the day it was to be held. Fans complained about waiting out in the sun with no food or water. Should have called Andy King! He’ll get you water, no matter what it takes.
So, in summation, Tana seems very on brand for 2019. Bella didn’t post about Tana on IG as much as she did about Mod Sun, which seems about right because this girl makes even Mod Sun and his deranged murder eyes look like a f*cking prince. I mean, a prince with a drug problem, sure, but a prince nonetheless.
I can only imagine the reason I didn’t realize that Bella was in a throuple was because 1) I do not know what a throuple is and 2) I was busy at church confessing my sins after seeing most of her posts.
So, what is a throuple? I asked old faithful, aka Urban Dictionary, and she told me a throuple is “a threelationship; a relationship with three partners. The throuple walked into the restaurant on Valentine’s Day.” Hmmm but would a non-traditional relationship celebrate a holiday constructed by the greeting card industry just to make money? I guess throuples can have diverse interests, just like the rest of us. It’s Britney, Betch claims she already told me about this arrangement but I guess I ignored it because the idea of someone convincing one person to date them, let alone TWO, just seemed selfish to me. I’m not bitter at all. Totally fine. Why do you ask?
Both Tana and Bella have acknowledged on Twitter that they are no longer together, but that they still have a lot of love for each other, or whatever BS celebrities say that really means they’ll still hook up when they’re drunk. Thankfully, Bella still has Mod Sun to serenade her vagina and help get her through the pain of the breakup. Small mercies.
Images: bellathorne/Twitter; bellathorne/Instagram (2); Giphy (2)
Bella Thorne has made plenty of questionable decisions in her life, but I can’t help loving her. Her particular brand of thirst is less refined than, say, an Ariel Winter or Ruby Rose, which makes her feel like a relatable mess. Sure, sometimes she goes a little too long without washing her hair, but no one is perfect, and shampoo is expensive. Either way, she’s still the star of a show on Freeform and I, my friends, am not. Like I said, Bella is my girl, but something has come to my attention that requires intense judgment: Bella Thorne’s dog is named Tampon.
Tampon. You read that correctly. Motherfucking Tampon.
We need to talk. Bella, honey, why? Now, to get it out of the way, there’s nothing wrong with the *idea* of tampons. The female reproductive system is a glorious miracle of nature, and no one over the age of 15 should give a shit about talking about periods. We’re all adults, it’s not that big of a deal. The miracle of life blah blah blah. That being said, why in the fuck would name your dog after a feminine hygiene product? It doesn’t even sound cute to say! Bella, I need ANSWERS.
Back when she got the dog in December, she took to Twitter to ask her fans what to name him. The two choices were Tampon and Cunty, which is obviously more inappropriate but arguably a better name? Idk, they both suck. Cunty actually won the Twitter poll, but obviously Bella Thorne doesn’t care about her fans, or she realized yelling “Cunty” in public repeatedly will get you some weird looks. And yet, I doubt Bella Thorne cares about the types of looks she receives in public. Anyway, let’s look at some photos of Tampon.
There’s Bella Thorne, hanging out at the pool with some kind of rattlesnake tattoo that I really hope is fake, and her adorable dog, Tampon. It’s such a sweet photo, and it almost makes you forget that this poor dog is going to suffer through its entire life being named Tampon. Ugh, this is making me so mad. That is like, the cutest dog I’ve seen in hours, and I want to follow it on Instagram, but I just can’t do that to myself. I thought Stormi was a bad name, but Kylie’s weather misspellings have nothing on Bella Thorne’s dog name.
In response to some commenters who were similarly horrified by the choice of name, Bella fought back with a truly puzzling reply:
naming her tampon? When did a tampon ever become a bad thing? When did someone buy a tampon and it didn’t come in handy?
Okay Bella, you’re like one step away from the Gretchen Weiners’ deranged Caesar monologue. First of all, tampon isn’t a bad thing, it’s just a fucking terrible name that is not at all pleasing to the ears. And yeah, great, tampons come in handy, I’ll be sure to keep that in mind when I name my next dog Phone Charger or Extra-Strength Advil. If you’re going to pick a name like Tampon, don’t even try to defend it. Just fucking go for it and fuck what the haters say.
This photo, from Tampon Thorne’s personal Instagram, is a LOT. Bella Thorne and her man Mod Sun are walking Tampon in the snow, and tbh Bella’s outfit might be more questionable than the choice of dog name. Bella’s shirt (most likely) says “Bitch I’m Bella Thorne” in a nod to her song/music video that have still yet to be released. The shirt is whatever, everyone needs a catchphrase. But she’s also wearing fishnets, some heels that look like look like reject Kinky Boots props, and a fur/leather coat that looks like what would happen if Hot Topic came out with a costume line. It is truly a look. Tampon probably doesn’t love his name, but he might be even more scared of his mommy’s outfit.
So there you have it: Bella Thorne has the world’s cutest dog, but it doesn’t even matter because Tampon is such a horrible name. It is truly a crime against humanity. Or I guess animal kind? Whatever. If you’re getting a new pet anytime soon and need name ideas, just steer clear of Tampon, or Maxi Pad, or any other inanimate object, especially one that has to do with your period. That’s obviously super limiting, but I’m sure you’ll think of something. As for Bella Thorne, it’s never too late to change a puppy’s name, is it?
Images: Shutterstock; @bellathorne / Instagram; @tampithetampon / Instagram (2)
As you may have noticed from the abundance of candy and flowers passing you by while you sat quietly in your cubicle and tried not to burn this city to the ground, yesterday was Valentine’s Day. Just me? Whatever, I’m allergic to
love flowers anyway.
Never one to let an opportunity to
embarrass herself on social media prove her love pass her by, on Valentine’s Day, Bella Thorne posted a tribute to her boyfriend, Mod Sun, and it’s beautiful and he’s perfect and I can see why they’re in love. KIDDING. I actually looked at it and had many thoughts, number one being what the fuck? So, I’m here to break down this post for you and analyze its most batshit crazy elements. Spoiler alert: there are a lot.
1. The Outfits
Let’s start with Bella’s, because hers is a little easier to analyze. It appears that Bella saw an episode of Parks and Recreation, thought to herself, “This is what big girls wear to work,” and threw on her best button-down and business pants. Unfortunately the camera on Parks and Rec never quite pans low enough to capture the characters’ shoes. So Bella put on her highest stripper heels, said, “nailed it!” and walked out the door. Mod Sun’s outfit seems a little more conflicted, which makes total sense considering he got dressed while on bath salts. The pants look like they were stolen from Guy Fieri’s closet, and the shoes look like they were ripped from the feet of a middle school girl on her way to the bus. Do we think he gets his entire wardrobe from petty theft? And don’t even get me started on the scarf. Where’d ya find a pink rabbit to skin, Mod Sun?
2. The Caption
Bella’s caption states that they have been “saying I love you since the first day we met.” Honey. The first day you met him, you should have thrown a pity dollar in his grimy guitar case and WALKED THE FUCK AWAY. You haven’t even been telling your mother you love her since the first day you met her, and you’ve decided that this dude who most definitely smells like a mixture of B.O. and weed was the person to start with? As our president would say: Sad!
What Bella should have said:
3. The Emojis
The final confusing element of this complicated and tragic puzzle we call an Instagram post is the emojis. I get the heart and the camera, but the tree and the baby are really calling to me here. Why choose a tree? Did they meet on his weed farm or are they just two people that appreciate nature while they’re high? What does it all mean? I also fully subscribe to the notion that you should not use a baby emoji unless you are actually having a baby. Which in this case could be true. The chances that a man in fire print pants knows how to use protection are slim to none. I’d also like to take this time to give an honorable mention to the location tag, “Falling In Love,” which is both nauseating and inconsistent (and also not a geographical place). Bella, you JUST said you’ve been telling Mod Sun you loved him since the day you met, and here you are months later, only now saying you’re falling in love? Which is it, hmm?
It looks like we’ll all be leaving here with more questions than we started with. You’re welcome. And for those of you who only came here because you thought Bella’s post would be half naked, I’ll kindly point you to her last Insta of the night and send you on your merry way.
Over the past year, Bella Thorne has made some, um, interesting life choices. From hooking up with Scott Disick in France to looking/acting like a total mess at all times, she’s given us ample reason to worry about her decision-making skills. Well, now Bella Thorne is dating a new man, we really need to talk about it.
His name is Mod Sun, and dating him is easily the most questionable thing she’s done yet, which is saying a lot. It’s like how every season of The Bachelor is the most dramatic season ever, except what I just said is true. Welcome to Mod Sun, the most dramatic season of Bella Thorne’s glitter-covered life.
Mod is a rapper from Minnesota (yeah) who’s apparently in a group called “The Poundzzzzzz,” which absolutely sounds made up, but nope. His name is an acronym that stands for “Movement on Dreams, Stand Under None,” which sounds like something your stoner ex-boyfriend would put in his Instagram bio. Basically, he’s a fucking intellectual.
In addition to being smart, he’s also suuuuuper hot. He basically looks like if Perez Hilton lived in the jungle for a year, or like every guy you see selling molly at Bonnaroo. He has long hair that Bella recently dyed green and red, which is about as cute a look as you’d imagine. Look, we’re not saying Scott Disick is the perfect man, but honey come on, when you’ve showered, YOU CAN DO BETTER. Oh, and he’s also a full decade older than her, because of course.
They’ve apparently been together since sometime in the fall, and Bella has openly posted about their relationship on social media. That’s cute we guess, but it’d be cuter if Bella went away somewhere for about six months and just thought about life. Try it sweetie, see you in June!