UPDATE: Well, we didn’t really expect that to be so simple, did we? With the court system mostly shut down due to COVID-19, Mary-Kate Olsen requested an emergency divorce filing last week, but that request has since been denied. A judge deemed that this case is “not essential,” which means Mary-Kate will have to wait a while before getting the divorce process going.
While the divorce is on hold indefinitely, the bigger question here is what will happen to the apartment. In her emergency request, Olsen said that her husband, Olivier Sarkozy, was forcing her out of their main apartment by May 18th, which I just realized is today. Now, Mary-Kate hasn’t actually been living there during quarantine, so it’s not like she’s getting thrown out on the streets, but she expressed concern that Sarkozy would destroy her personal property inside the apartment.
So with the emergency divorce not being granted, it seems like Sarkozy is pretty free to do whatever he wants for the time being. Hopefully he and Mary-Kate can work something out for the time being, because it would be pretty sh*tty for him to just like, throw away her stuff.
Earlier this week, I wrote about 10 of the messiest celebrity divorces ever. That list had everything: cheating scandals, custody disputes, and enough pettiness to last a lifetime. Well, I’m starting to think I spoke a little too soon. (Or predicted the future, depending on how you want to look at it.) On Wednesday, news broke that Mary-Kate Olsen is divorcing her husband Olivier Sarkozy, and we’re already getting a look into the legal details of their situation. In short, it sounds like a f*cking disaster.
Here’s a quick refresher, so we’re all up to speed. Mary-Kate married Olivier, who’s the half-brother of former French President Nicolas Sarkozy, in 2015. He’s 17 years her senior—she’s 33, and he’s 50. Olivier has two daughters from a previous marriage, both of whom are taller than Mary-Kate. That’s not important here, I just think it’s funny. Their relationship always felt a little strange, but they seemed like kind of a good match to me. We never saw any photos from their wedding, but a source famously said there were “bowls and bowls of cigarettes” at the reception, so just let your imagination run wild with that.
But fast forward five years, and things are obviously not so great anymore. On April 17th, Mary-Kate Olsen signed a summons and complaint for divorce, and those papers were then sent to the New York Supreme Court. But things quickly hit a snag, because the New York court system is not accepting divorce filings right now. In light of the pandemic, the Courts have placed a temporary “prohibition on the filing of new, non-essential matters,” which includes divorces.
But things aren’t that simple. On Wednesday, Olsen requested that she be allowed to file an emergency divorce petition, claiming that Sarkozy terminated the lease on their New York City apartment without her consent. In the request, she wrote, “This application is an emergency because my husband expects me to move out of our home on Monday, May 18, 2020 in the middle of New York City being on pause due to COVID-19.” She says in the request that she’s reached out to Sarkozy’s attorney and her landlord, asking that the lease be extended past the end of this month, and adds, “I am petrified that my husband is trying to deprive me of the home we have lived in and if he is successful, I will not only lose my home but I risk losing my personal property as well.”
In an email from May 3rd that was included with the filing, Sarkozy explained that he was terminating the lease because he is “not in a position to extend it and/or pay additional rent.” I don’t know all the details of this situation, but this makes no sense. Without even taking Olivier’s money into account, Mary-Kate Olsen has an estimated net worth of $250 million. I’m sure their apartment in Gramercy is very fancy, and it’s a tough economic time, but I feel pretty confident these two can still pay rent. To me, this sounds like a toxic game, and it’s stressing me the f*ck out.
No divorce is simple, but this apartment situation is way more complicated due to the COVID-19 pandemic. It sounds like Sarkozy is currently staying somewhere else in NYC, but Mary-Kate is riding out the quarantine at their home in the Hamptons. For this reason, she says that she can’t “look for another apartment right now, let alone retrieve my separate property belongings,” adding that she is “gravely concerned my husband will dissipate, dispose of and/or secret” her belongings that are currently in the apartment. I’m glad she’s not trying to drop everything and come back to the epicenter of a pandemic, but this is a very sh*tty situation. Like, imagine being told that you have to be out of your apartment in a week, but you also can’t go there to get any of your stuff. I’m moving in four months, and I’m already panicked about packing! Truly a nightmare.
There’s one other important piece of the emergency petition that Mary-Kate Olsen filed this week. She’s requesting that her prenuptial agreement be enforced, and given that $250 million estimated net worth that I mentioned, that’s exactly what she should do. A source told Us Weekly that Mary-Kate has an “ironclad prenup”, which might be the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard. According to the source, “her business interests and fortune are protected,” which is a huge relief to hear. If she can just get this apartment fiasco sorted out, the actual divorce proceedings will be pretty straightforward. Well, they should be, but with the messiness we’re already seeing here, I imagine nothing will be simple.
So far, Mary-Kate Olsen hasn’t commented on her divorce, but given that she and her sister Ashley are pretty much the most private people on the planet, I wouldn’t expect to hear anything directly from her. But with divorce proceedings being public, we’ll know as soon as there’s an update on her emergency filing. Until then, I’ll be working on my top-secret plan to somehow get the Olsen Twins back into acting. It’ll never happen, but hey, we can dream.
Images: s_bukley / Shutterstock.com
Since its launch, Instagram has evolved from an app where you posted grainy photos of your Starbucks drink for your 24 followers to a global platform that’s basically its own economy. I mean, just look at the number of thinkpieces about what will happen now that Instagram is hiding like counts. Of course, Instagram has created an entire world of influencers and semi-models who rely on their likes, but then you also have the real celebrities. Some do ads (even though they don’t need to), some just post whatever they want. There are entire Instagram accounts dedicated to what celebrities are doing on Instagram, and nowadays, something as simple as a like can turn into a newsworthy event.
While some celebs were early adopters of Instagram, more and more famous people have finally joined in the last year or two. More famously, Jennifer Aniston joined Instagram and promptly broke the app, and Matthew Perry just joined too. By now, it feels like almost everyone has taken the Insta plunge, but there are still some holdouts that have never tried it out. But if you ask me, every celebrity should be on Instagram. Give the people what they want!! Here are the top celebs who, surprisingly, have still not made an account.
1. Meryl Streep
For a long time, it made sense that Meryl Streep wasn’t on Instagram. She’s older, she definitely doesn’t need social media to advance her career, and she just feels too classy for a platform that is rife with memes and dildo ads. But now, more and more legendary A-list actresses, like Julia Roberts, Glenn Close, and Candice Bergen, have joined, so Meryl would fit right in. While we wait patiently for her to make an account, at least we can follow @tasteofstreep, an absolutely delightful account dedicated to Photoshopping photos of Meryl onto photos of food. It’s weird, but it works.
2. Mary-Kate And Ashley
It’s been a long time since our favorite twins have actually wanted to be in the spotlight, so it’s not really surprising that they’ve stayed off Instagram. But still, I feel like they should make an account just for the amazing throwback pictures they must have. In general, I just want to know everything about their lives, but that probably won’t ever happen. Mary-Kate and Ashley have numerous great fan accounts, and I guess that will have to do.
3. Kanye West
If Kanye West had Instagram, it would definitely be a mess, and he would probably get a ton backlash for half of the stuff he posted…but that just makes me want it to happen even more. What can I say, I’m a messy bitch who lives for drama. Actually, Kanye has had Instagram before, and it was a wild f*cking ride full of random art and children that are not his own. I’ve never felt more alive then that one year when Kanye was all over Instagram, and I kinda miss it. Except now, his account would probably just be Bible quotes. On second thought, let’s pass.
4. Amy Adams
In a similar vein as Meryl Streep, Amy Adams is a serious actress who has never really dipped her toes into the world of social media, and it makes me sad. Amy is funny, talented, and she must have a ton of famous friends, so the fact that she’s not on Insta just feels like we’re missing out. She’s pretty private, and has said that she doesn’t even think of herself as a celebrity, so I doubt we’ll see her on Instagram soon, but maybe someday.
5. Anna Wintour
Anna Wintour is one of the most influential people in the world, but when it comes to social media, she’s not into it. She’s famously said that she’s never taken a selfie, and I can’t imagine she has any plans to start, but her Instagram would be amazing. She knows basically every celebrity, her travel content would be fire, and can you even imagine the #OOTDs? I’d die.
Images: courteneycoxofficial, tasteofstreep, olsenmoodboard, kimkardashian, itsamyadams, theannawintour / Instagram
Celebrities…they really aren’t just like us. “Oh, I have perfect skin from drinking lots of water and wearing sunscreen.” Bullshit. You get facials worth thousands of dollars and cake on La Mer. “I lost the baby weight because chasing my kids is a workout class on its own!” Oh please, you did two-a-day sessions with Kirk Myers or Gunnar Peterson and may or may not have had some lipo. But one thing that does humanize celebrities a little more? The embarrassing drunken celebrity hookups that they’d probably love to forget. And obviously, we’d love to remind them because sometimes those who have stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame should be knocked down a few pegs by doing a walk of shame.
Mary-Kate Olsen and Kanye West
Ever since Mary-Kate’s relationship with Stavros Niarchos ended and Ashley and her college sweetheart broke up, the Olsen twins seem to have a type: much older rich dudes that are….well….ugly hot would be sugarcoating it, right? Kanye West’s type, on the other hand, is a lot more bootylicious. So Mary-Kate and Kanye must have been super drunk when, reportedly, they made out at Kanye’s birthday party over a decade ago, because they could not be more the opposite of each other’s types. Let’s hope that drunken makeout didn’t lead them to the bedroom, because Kanye seems like the kind of guy who says his own name during sex. But at least we now know why Kanye rapped, “Prince William ain’t doing it right if you ask me. If I was him, I would have married Kate and Ashley.”
Paris Hilton and Jared Leto
Jared Leto seems like that guy who takes himself so seriously that he explains the *profound* meaning behind his tattoos even though you didn’t even ask. He seems like that kind of guy who will whip out an acoustic guitar at the most random of moments in group settings and start playing songs he wrote, coercing people into giving him halfhearted approval for his shitty lyrics. He’s that guy that closes his eyes and nods his head solemnly after he gives you unsolicited advice that is really just quotes he saw on Instagram. In other words? He has the charisma of a creepy cult leader, whereas Paris is so much like a Barbie doll come to life that she puts Tyra Banks in Life-Size to shame. So it makes zero sense that these two drunkenly made out at Sundance a decade ago. The only thing I can think of that these two have in common is that they were bonding over how they have the same hair colorist or facialist since they both clearly put in a lot of effort into their appearances. Hey Jared, I get my hair colored at IGK too. Does that mean I can drunkenly make out with you?
Selena Gomez and Orlando Bloom
The best kind of hookup is the revenge hookup. Okay, it’s not exactly healthy for the people involved, but that’s between them and their respective shrinks. From a gossip standpoint, though? It’s 24k gold. Miranda Kerr reportedly cheated on husband Orlando Bloom with Justin Bieber a while back. And that is just so…ew. Really? Sweetie, you’re more than a decade older than him and you’re married to one of the hottest B-list actors on the planet. I guess it’s true that when people cheat, they cheat down. Selena Gomez is no stranger to getting screwed over by Justin either, and she and Orlando must have bonded over that while partying at a Las Vegas nightclub, because what else would a Disney Channel star have to talk about with a man who’s 16 years older than her? They were photographed getting very touchy-feely with each other, and we all know there’s no such thing as a sober Las Vegas hookup, right? 
Scarlett Johansson and Benicio del Toro
Scarlett Johansson is one of the most beautiful women in the world, and Benicio del Toro…has his angles where he looks kinda good. Everyone knows that, besides the Golden Globes, the Oscars are the drunkest night of the year in Hollywood. So of course, that leads to drunken hookups. Back in 2004, Scarlett and Benicio reportedly had a drunken hookup in the elevator at the Chateau Marmont. Neither of them has confirmed it, but neither of them has denied it either. We’ll have to add elevator sex to our bucket list, because a quickie like that sounds kinda hot.
Scott Disick and Bella Thorne
Scott Disick is pretty much always drunk, so that means every hookup with Scott Disick is most likely a drunken hookup. But still, how random is it that he hooked up with Bella Thorne? Scott Disick and Bella Thorne had a drunken tryst at Cannes last year. It was pretty obvious from the paparazzi photos that they were all over each other and #whitegirlwasted. Bella denied hooking up with Scott, but we all know that based on the photographic evidence, that’s probably not true. Why else would you be holding hands outside of 1OAK, the club where celebrities and desperate basic bitches go just so they can be seen? We can’t believe we’re saying this, but this hookup makes us actually like Sofia and Scott together.
Liam Hemsworth and January Jones
Remember when Hollywood’s golden couple, Liam and Miley, first broke up? We try to forget because they’re so perfect for each other. But this was at the beginning of Miley’s wild stage—you know, when she would dry hump teddy bears on stage, barely wore any clothes, and would not keep her tongue inside her mouth? Towards the end of their relationship, Liam couldn’t keep his tongue inside his mouth either because he was busy at a Chateau Marmont party locking lips with January Jones. The party was sponsored by Grey Goose, so you know these two were definitely wasted. They were photographed leaving together, and that’s when the news broke that Miley and Liam were over. We’re glad she forgave him for cheating with January and we’re glad he forgave her for Miley Cyrus & Her Dead Petz.
Images: Giphy (3)
