By now, Peter Weber’s season of The Bachelor feels like a distant memory. Bigger issues have overtaken our world, like the fact that The Bachelorette is delayed indefinitely, and we’re now forced to suffer through Listen To Your Heart every Monday. Pilot Pete’s season may have been a mess, but now we’re in truly desperate times. Luckily, these thirst-monsters are still clinging to relevance, so we’ve got more drama between Peter and Madison to deal with.
A lot has happened in the last month, so here’s a quick refresher. On the finale of The Bachelor, Peter broke off his engagement to Hannah Ann, and then said he wanted to make things work with Madison. They got back together, before announcing their split just two days later. Were they ever really back together? Debatable. Fast forward a few weeks, and Peter flew to Chicago, where he’s been quarantining with Kelley Flanagan. A couple weeks ago, he went on several podcasts and claimed that nothing serious is going on between them, but who really cares? Madison, meanwhile, has been quarantining at her parents’ house in Alabama, and based on her cringeworthy TikToks, she’s fully reverted back to the life of a high school girl. Okay, great, now we’re caught up.
Over the weekend, the shade between Madison and Peter kicked off on TikTok, of all places. Madi posted a cute video featuring several women from Peter’s season, not including Kelley. There were also like, 20 other women missing, but whatever. Someone commented asking where Kelley was, and Madi replied, “with our ex lol.” Honestly, I screamed when I saw that. Props to Madison for this A+ shade, because I had no idea she had it in her.
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Just from that comment, it was apparent that there were some hard feelings going on here, and now we have some more clarity on the situation. Madison made an appearance on the newest episode of Kaitlyn Bristowe’s Off The Vine podcast, and she spilled some major tea about the complicated timeline. When asked about her relationship with Kelley, Madison said that they were “inseparable throughout the entire process,” so she was “definitely hurt and thrown off” when she saw that Kelley was with Peter.
In any situation, it would be weird if one of your good friends got together with your ex. But Madi says it was “really confusing,” because Peter was trying to get back with her just TWO DAYS before he was seen in Chicago. She says, “He was, like, calling me and texting me being like, ‘I miss you, let’s get back together… I think that to me was a little confusing.” Hmm, to me it sounds like Peter was basically just in the mood to quarantine with someone, and he may have been looking into multiple options. Classic f*ckboy behavior, and it wouldn’t be the least bit surprising coming from Pilot Pete.
Speaking of f*ckboy behavior, his bizarre treatment of Madison continued when he reached out after the photos with Kelley were released. Madison told Kaitlyn that “He sent me this long, long text, kind of explaining himself, but not really. Just kind of sharing the current situation or whatever. I was very kind back, I was just like, ‘Look, this doesn’t affect anything for me, like, we went our separate ways, it’s not like I lost something here.’ I guess, but I told him kind of what I’m saying. What I’m confused about Peter is two days ago you were telling me how much you loved me and wanted to get back together and now you’re with the one person that was my best friend. It just feels a little hurtful.”
Damn, Madison really went in here, and I’ve never liked her more than I do right now. I don’t doubt that, at some point, Peter had deep, genuine feelings for Madison, but he needs to get over it and stop acting like all this stuff hasn’t gone down since. Madi is clearly doing fine, so stop texting her whiney bullsh*t when you’re shacking up with a woman who used to be her close friend.
In conclusion, Madison said she wishes Peter and Kelley all the best, but added that she hasn’t spoken to Kelley “in a really long time.” I would say that makes me sad, but I don’t have actual emotions for these people. Also, in what real world would a 28-year-old Chicago lawyer be friends with a 24-year-old from Alabama? They’ll both get over it.
But who’s not over it? Peter! He clearly felt some type of way about what Madison said on the podcast, and he decided the public comments on a Bachelor tea Instagram page was the appropriate place to express this. He tagged Madi, saying “you’d think you’d have a little more respect for this situation given we both know there’s more to the story…”
Okay, while I don’t know what Peter is alluding to here, I feel like he’s being a little bit of a drama queen. First of all, could he not just text her about this? He clearly had her number as of *checks notes* two days before he went to Chicago to stay with Kelley! Also, talking about this stuff on podcasts is petty much par for the course for these people. Peter, just a few weeks ago, went on three different Bachelor podcasts in the same week! He might not have liked what Madison had to say, but it’s not like she ruined his life or anything. All of these people are just trying to get a few more headlines before we stop caring about them, so it’s not really worth getting mad about.
What is worth getting mad about? The fact that Paradise likely won’t happen this year, so we won’t get to see any of this petty drama play out in person. There is nothing I would love more right now than to see Kelley and Madison come face to face on that beach and spend two full episodes arguing about who texted Peter and when. Throw Hannah Ann in the mix, and you barely need anyone else for the whole season! If we don’t get to see this, then we’ll really have something to complain about. See, Peter? There are things in the world that actually MATTER!! Now spend less time in the Instagram comment section, and more time working on your TikTok skills, because they’re dismal.
Images: ABC/John Fleenor; thebetchelor, bachelornation.scoop / Instagram
Well fam, I’ve been saying since *checks notes* January that Pilot Pete would be alone at the end of this season of The Bachelor, and what can I say, I love being right. On Thursday night, just two days after saying on live TV that they were going to give their relationship a shot, Peter and Madison announced that they’re going their separate ways. And honestly? Thank god.
Peter was basically a mess this entire season, and for many reasons, he deserves to be alone right now. But aside from all that, anyone with a functioning brain (or a basic sex education) could see that Peter and Madison were never going to make it in the real world. Still, it seemed like they might stick it out for more than 48 hours, but it wasn’t meant to be. Really, the abrupt timing of these statements makes me think that they never really got back together at all, but Peter (and the producers) didn’t want him to just be sad and alone at the finale.
In Peter’s statement on Instagram, he started by “acknowledging the incredible group of women” that competed on his season, conveniently ignoring the fact that two-thirds of them are legitimate nightmares. But sure, great group of women. He continued, saying that he and Madi have “mutually decided not to pursue our relationship any further,” and that this decision was “not easy for either of us to be ok with,” but it makes the most sense for both of them. I mean, duh. Barb Weber basically called her son a sex addict on national TV, so it’s no big shock that the thought of going months or years without getting laid wasn’t actually that appealing to him. And Madi obviously needs this time to work on her eyelashes, so it’s not good timing for her either.
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I want to start by acknowledging the incredible group of women that I had the privilege of getting to know this season. Thank you for coming on this journey with me. I learned so many lessons from all of you that I will carry with me. Madi, thank you for your patience and unconditional love. You’re the epitome of a woman who carries herself with grace, stands by what she believes in, and loves whole heartedly. That love is something I feel so grateful to have felt and will take a piece of that with me always going forward. Madi and I have mutually decided to not pursue our relationship any further. Believe me this was not easy for either of us to be ok with, but after a lot of honest conversations, we have agreed that this is what makes most sense for the two of us. The love and respect I have for Madi will continue to endure. Hannah Ann, you set an example for women everywhere a couple nights ago. You are such a strong, confident woman and you deserve all the love in the world. I accept full responsibility for my mistakes in our relationship and wish you only the best. This has been an emotional experience and I am so grateful for the outreach of support that I have received from friends, family, and Bachelor Nation in the last few days. Thank you to all of you! This is just a another chapter in my story. One I will never forget and one I will always cherish ❤️
Peter also shouted out Hannah Ann for basically dragging her through hell over the past couple months, saying he accepts responsibilities for his mistakes, and wishing her the best. She hit a million Instagram followers earlier this week and has been hanging out with NFL players, so I think she’ll be just fine. Who could’ve predicted that I would be a full-on Hannah Ann stan at the end of this season? A Hannah Stann, if you will.
Moving on, Madison made an Instagram statement of her own, and you can tell a publicist crafted it within an inch of its life. She says that her Bachelor experience has taught her “the importance of acceptance, forgiveness, and grace,” along with the importance of the word “like” in her vocabulary. I added that last part, in case that wasn’t clear.
She’s super confident in God’s plan for her or whatever, and is still convinced that she and Peter’s “paths were meant to cross.” Sorry, not to be rude, but I have a hard time taking all this Jesus stuff seriously. Like, you applied to be on a reality show to get famous on Instagram, and it worked! Good for you! But we don’t have to pretend that the Lord was like, invested in whether or not Pete was gonna sleep with Victoria or whether you were going to land a FabFitFun deal after this. I’m no prophet, but I’d guess He probably has more important things to worry about, like coronavirus, and whether or not my Seamless is going to show up on time.
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So incredibly thankful for this amazing journey I’ve had the honor of being a part of. I have grown so much and am stronger than I was going in. I have learned the importance of acceptance, forgiveness, and grace. As Peter and I have decided to go our separate ways, I am confident that we will both move in the direction of our purpose and never forget that God has a plan in all things. I will always love and respect him. I am convinced our paths were meant to cross and we are both better because they did. @pilot_pete you are an amazing guy and I’m thankful for you. I will always be your biggest fan. And to the amazing women I met this season, I will love you for life. Thank you @abcnetwork for allowing me to embark on this journey. ❤️
Madi says that Peter is “an amazing guy” and that she’ll always be his “biggest fan,” and I’ve had about enough of these statements. You know Madison is already headed back to Auburn to self-quarantine and play some basketball with her dad, and Peter is probably begging his mom to love him again after she ripped him a new asshole on television. Everyone in this situation is moving on with their lives, and it’s gonna be fine.
And with that, I think we can finally shut the door on this season of The Bachelor. Nobody found love, nobody had a good time, nobody passed go, and absolutely nobody collected $200. We were all bamboozled, hoodwinked, and led astray. Hopefully the coronavirus quarantines give the ABC producers some time to think about their choices, and avoid a disaster season like this happening again.
Images: pilot_pete, madiprew / Instagram