We all love reading about our zodiac signs, even though horoscopes might not be the most scientifically accurate. The brand just revealed the results from their 2019 SKYN Condoms Sex & Intimacy Survey, which asked 2,000 Gen-Z adults (18-22) and millennials (23-38) in the US and Canada detailed information about everything from condom use and sexual education to favorite sexual positions and fantasies. Some of the results were kind of surprising—like how 65% of Gen-Z reports using a condom all or some of the time, while only 54% of millennials could say the same. Some were disappointing, like how Gen-Z fakes orgasms more often than millennials (10% of the time versus 6%, respectively). But in addition to breaking down their findings by generation, we worked with Skyn to break things down by astrological sign. It’s the perfect mix of astrology and science. So read on to find out what your zodiac sign reveals about how you are in bed.
According to Skyn’s research, if you’re an Aquarius-born person, you use lube most frequently and toys while you masturbate. While those are all great characteristics for a partner, if your SO is an Aquarius, don’t bother asking for a threesome. They are least likely to have one. On top of that, they are the least adventurous when it comes to locations to have sex, so keep it in the bedroom.
If you’re a Pisces, you’re freaky. You are most likely to have filmed yourself and a partner having sex multiple times. But!! If you’re going to film yourself having sex, make sure everyone involved consents and is over 18 (*cough* Rob Lowe *cough*). As well, you’re more likely to be in an open relationship and are the biggest fans of vibrators. But beware of calling your partner the wrong name, since you are most likely to do so. Yikes.
Ahh Aries. Lucky for you, you last the longest during sex—an average of 31 minutes. You’re also most likely to use a sex toy. Fun! However, you are also most likely to have had a dry spell (aka no sex) for over 2 years, other than when you lost your V card. Maybe that has to do with the fact that you are also most likely to fake an orgasm. 12% of Aries reported faking an orgasm every damn time they had sex. Unless you’re imitating Sally, STOP IT!
If you’re a Taurus, you’re least likely to want to spice things up in the bedroom. So either you’re intimidated or super vanilla. No shame in the latter, but if it’s the former, maybe work on it? It’s worth it to switch things up, I promise. Skyn also found that you would prefer to give up social media for a year instead of sex, and like honestly, I agree. Finally, if anyone is interested in having an open relationship, hit up a Taurus ’cause they are most likely to consider it.
Beware of Geminis. While you are least likely to fake an orgasm (take note, Aries), you are most likely to overreport the number of people you’ve slept with. Why? Just keep it real. But on the flip side, Geminis are also most likely to still be a virgin. I was hoping Steve Carell was a Gemini, but he isn’t. Is Colton?? Whatever. Unlike a Taurus, you are most hesitant to give up social media for a year over sex. So either you’re v attached to your phone or the sex you’ve had is not very good.
I’ve never been happier to be referred to as a disease until today. As a Cancer, I have the most sex out of all the signs and am most adventurous outside the bedroom. Seems fitting for the things I write about (sorry mom). Cancers love cowgirl—37% rated it in their “Top 3 Fav Positions.” And, when it comes to one night stands, Cancers are most likely to find someone on a night out. Get it, Cancers.
If you’re a Leo, you’re most likely to use social media DMs as a way to sext. You love dirty talk and find it a major confidence booster. You also love a good blindfold, so partners of Leos, take note. But buyer beware: the majority of Leos believe that size is “very or somewhat important” for sexual pleasure. Listen, it isn’t about the size of the wand, it’s about the skills of the wizard (or however that saying goes).
Since Virgos are “supposedly” the most studious, you are most likely to meet your SO at school. Unlike Aquarians, you are most likely to be open to a threesome. Fun! While you are also more likely to have sex on the first date, you are the least likely to experiment with sexual fluidity. No shame in that, though—you know what you like and you stick to it.
Your fav sex position is probs doggy, since 67% of Libra’s rated it in their “Top 3 Fav Positions.” You are least likely to use a condom (I won’t lecture you, but be safe pls). You are most likely to judge someone with multiple partners, and maybe that is you just being bitter, given that a quarter of Libras said they masturbate more than five times a week. Maybe lessen up on the judgment, k?
You are most likely to buy condoms online, and while you’re at it, throw some cuffs into your Amazon cart since you are also most likely to use some sort of restraints, you kinky people. As well, Scorpios are the most successful when it comes to datings apps. You are also most likely to think foreplay is overrated. I disagree but again, I’m a Cancer so …
You are smart and safe. You are most likely to use condoms, and I commend you for that. Maybe you should talk to your Libra friends about the wonders of protection. While you are most likely to wrap it before you tap it, you are least likely to lube it up before you use it. Uh, ouch? You also play hard to get, being among the least likely to have sex on the first date. Finally, you prefer giving over receiving oral sex. You generous soul.
You find it difficult to be in a relationship, making you the most likely to stay single. Although you may be single, you experiment and are the biggest fans of flavored condoms (don’t worry, Skyn makes condoms inspired by our fav cocktails). While you may like flavors, you are rather vanilla when it comes to positions. Missionary is the favorite position among Capricorns. And luck you, Capricorns are most likely to orgasm more than once during sex.
Images: Giphy (12)
Sponsored by Queen V
I’m sure I’m not alone when I say I’ve often thought life would be easier without a vagina. I know I’m supposed to embrace it and take pride in my womanhood and blah blah but come TF on. The only times I’m really paying attention down there are when it’s busy ruining my favorite underwear with a surprise period or surprise infection, or busy ruining my sex life by suddenly being bone dry. It’s not exactly the perfect recipe for a loving relationship with my platinum vagine. (I kid. I’d probably give it like a bronze.)
Luckily, sexy new company Queen V is here to solve all my problems. A group of like-minded women got together and decided they were sick of out-of-touch dudes manufacturing bogus vaginal products (same). Instead, they thought the women of today deserved cute, affordable, and genuinely effective vaginal products. (Groundbreaking, right? Sadly, it really is.) Here are the products you’re about to be obsessed with. You and your “Queen V”—as founder Lauren Steinberg refers to it, a term I fully intend to steal—can thank me later.
Make It Reign/V Bar
You know how gynecologists are always telling you not to douche up there? How your vagina is “self-cleaning” and body wash will just fuck up the pH? Well, while the pH stuff is spot on, I’ve never loved the alternative of “just throw a little water on it and hope for the best.” Enter Queen V, with not one, but TWO cleansers I am allowed to use for my whole entire body! With V Bar or Make It Reign (moment of credit for the cute-ass names), you can actually clean yourself without worrying about accidentally giving yourself BV. And they say women’s lib is a myth. As an added bonus, they’re made with yummy ingredients like rosewater, aloe, green tea, mango, and chamomile. So you can still smell like you paid an extra $10 for a marked-up “women’s soap”—when you could actually buy both for a total of $9. Score.
Honestly, if you’re not taking some kind of probiotic right now, it’s time to move into 2018. We already discussed how good they are to beat bloat—but did you know they can also help prevent yeast infections? Queen V’s Daily Dose Probiotic has all the same digestive health properties, but is specially formulated to keep your yeast/bacteria levels where they should be. It also includes turmeric, which has amazing anti-inflammatory properties in addition to helping skin conditions like acne, eczema, or psoriasis. Basically, this shit will keep you 100 from head to toe. Buy ASAP.
Speaking of yeast infections—is there anything that makes you hate your vag more? Sure, there’s the excruciating pain of UTIs. (And should that problem arise, Queen V’s UTMI supplement is formulated with cranberry to promote urinary tract health.) But at least most UTIs can be treated with an antibiotic that’s meant to work within 24 hours. With yeast, you’re basically told to handle it on your own for the coming week, and shove a bunch of chemical goop up there whenever it gets unmanageably itchy. (So like, every second of every day until it’s gone. Seriously, I don’t know why I even buy cute underwear anymore.) Enter The Eraser: a boric acid suppository for soothing yeast symptoms. It’s basically a less-scary and longer-lasting alternative to the creams that promise to remove all feeling from the area and wear off 20 minutes later. (Neither of which is an ideal outcome). With The Eraser, you get relief without the mess, and without the ingredients you can’t pronounce.
P.S. I Lube You
Finally, we’ve arrived at my favorite of the bunch. As my local Rite Aid can attest from watching me crouch for 45 minutes in the “family planning” aisle, lube options often really, really suck. Also, as my local Rite Aid can hopefully NOT attest, lubes can often seriously fuck up your vagina. (Anyone think they’d test the ingredients more if lube went inside men? Yeah, me too.) Anyway, all the more reason to buy lube made BY women, FOR women. P.S. I Lube You (another adorable name, minus the images it conjures up of a sobbing Hilary Swank) is an aloe-based lubricant that does more than make sex better. (Though honestly, that’s enough for me.) It actually protects and hydrates you down there—which, given my obsession with moisturizing, was incentive enough for me to double my order. Oh, and it’s organic. Gwyneth would so approve.
If nothing in this list spoke to you, you should absolutely check out their full list of products here. Whether you’re looking to #maintainyourv, #enjoyyourv (hint: this is the section with lube in it—also a nice bubble bath), or #healyourv, Queen V has you covered. Now that Queen V has pointed out that men really shouldn’t be selling you vaginal products (and are in fact getting it wrong a lot of the time), I’m not sure I can ever go back. These products are available at Walmart across the country, affordable AF, and come in way cuter packaging than vaginal products have any right to—without the insulting “pink tax” connotations. It’s basically the Glossier of vaginas, and I for one am obsessed.
Images: Giphy (1); Instagram (4)
A lot of women forgo lube in their sexual exploits, and I hate to be the one to tell you, but you’re doing it wrong. It’s not just for old, dried up, menopausal women. Lube prevents injury, makes sex more enjoyable, and assists you in more complicated positions. If you’re stressed, old, taking certain meds, or your estrogen levels are fucked up (like around your period), lube can help you out. Also, if you married rich but the guy’s gross, lube will be your best friend (aside from spiking his spaghetti sauce with an Ambien to avoid the issue altogether). There are so many different kinds of lube, so here is what to use.
Water-based lube is a favorite for many reasons: it’s effective, it’s easy to clean, it absorbs into the skin, and it is safe to use with condoms. It’s also less likely to irritate sensitive skin. This particular one is paraben-free, hypo-allergenic, and vegan. Perfect for fucking your favorite hippie.
Sliquid H20 Intimate Lube
Oil-based is only for people who aren’t using condoms, as the oil can cause rubber to deteriorate. It can also ruin rubber toys, so plan accordingly. But it’s easy to find and totally natural. My vag doctor recommends just using Vitamin E oil as lube—it’s cheap af and healthy for both you and your partner’s skin tissue. Plus, you can use it as a moisturizer beforehand.
Trader Joe’s Vitamin E Oil
Silicone lube is thicker, doesn’t absorb into the skin, and lasts longer. It washes off with soap and water, but it has the most staying power. It’s especially useful if you’re having water sex and need a boost. You just can’t use it with silicone-based toys.
Swiss Navy Silicone Lubricant
If you’re looking for something thicker, or if you’re like the super religious girls at my high school who insisted on only doing anal so that Jesus would be proud of them for not having vaginal sex before marriage (seriously, not a joke, what the fuck is wrong with people?), you need something heavy like Astroglide. This is a classic and is a favorite among the porn and BDSM communities, so you know this shit works. It’s also water-based, meaning you can use it with condoms. Which I hope to God you use, especially if you’re doing anal, because I’m assuming that can get really fucking disgusting very quickly.
Astroglide Gel Personal Lubricant
Images: Amazon (4)
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