In our ongoing efforts to make astrology the most widely accepted religion of 2018, we present to you our sign season horoscopes. Every month we’ll spotlight the sign of the season and give you a preview of what their four-week long birthday celebration will look like. This month begins Gemini horoscope season. Another reason to waste time at work while reading about yourself? The greatest birthday gift of all.
Have you felt different this week? Like something is slightly off but you can’t quite tell what it is? Like maybe reality has shifted but it hasn’t ruined your life yet so you’re just sitting in wait? Don’t worry, that’s normal. Welcome to Gemini season, betches.
Geminis might be the zodiac world’s favorite sign to shit on, but for the next month they are the queens of the castle. What does that mean for the rest of us civilians? That your life just became that much more extra. The events? Nonstop. The drinking? Excessive. The drama? Aggressive. Your bank account? Depleted. Peace and quiet? Cancelled until further notice.
While it may be fun to complain about their two-faced nature and general tendency to make everything 100% more complicated than it needs to be, the truth is that we all love a Gemini. The proverbial Gemini is a snake, a Twitter meme come to life, the reason we all tell our friends to not have sex in August.
Gemini season mood: looking for trouble and if I can not find it, I will create it
— ???????????????? ???????????????????????? (@cozycancer) May 21, 2018
But if we’re being honest, real life Geminis are our ride or dies. We love them, we trust them, and we know that both of their faces will always have our backs. So here’s to you, Gemini: May the next month be everything you dreamed of, and enough to help you endure the other 11 months of the year when we all ceaselessly drag you.
The last few months have been a bit unsteady, Gemini. Not necessarily bad, just unsure. You’ve been handling it like a champ, taking the uncertainty and fitting it into your routine, but secretly you’ve always known that it was building to something. This month, all those changes and question marks in your life will finally amount to something, and it will be a turning point for you. No pressure here, but you’re going to have to make a decision.
You probably don’t like the sound of this, considering this is supposed to be a month of nonstop celebration, but don’t fret. Whatever change is coming your way doesn’t have to be life-ending. In fact, it may be all the more reason to celebrate. Start taking stock of your life: what makes you happy, what you could do without, and be ready for the moment that could make all the difference.
You’ve finally reached a point in your job where you feel comfortable. This is a big moment, but don’t let it make you complacent. It’s easy to see summer on the horizon and immediately kick back and turn on that “out of office” message, but it’s important that you don’t waste all the momentum that you accrued getting to this point. There’s nothing wrong with taking a break here and there, but don’t fall behind just because you feel like you can. This is no time to rest on your yannies laurels.
Love is in the air, huh, Gemini? The weather is warm, the attractive people in your city are emerging from hibernation, and you’re ready to put yourself out there. Our advice: while dating around is all good and fun, don’t let it distract you from real connections you may be making. There’s no need to rush into a relationship, especially with summer on the horizon, but don’t close yourself off to the possibility of finding someone you really connect with. Casual dating doesn’t mean you need a roster—you can still make a summer of memories out of one great person.
After months of saving up, it is TIME. Go wild on a new summer wardrobe. Spring for that spontaneous trip you’ve been aching to take. Get yourself a new look to go with the new weather. However you want to treat yourself this month, do it. You spent all winter being frugal af just to make it to this moment. Don’t hold back.
What to Watch Out For
After being a major emotional support system in your friend group for so long, it can be hard to put yourself first, Gemini. You’re going to need to get past that, because there’s a lot of shit coming your way this month, and you’re going to need to lean on the people close to you to get through it. Your friends may not be accustomed to dropping everything to be there for someone, but they’re going to need to learn real quick. Watch out for anyone who refuses to reciprocate your constant support. One-sided relationships are for Postmates and pets, and nothing else.
Images: Giphy (2)