As much as we’d all like to be that girl who gets in an hour-long cardio session at 7am when the rest of the world is sleeping, it’s just not gonna happen. In fact, the idea of getting out of bed to do something active while I could be in a deep sleep literally makes me nauseous. We all have those
years days that getting to the gym just isn’t in the cards for us, but it would still be nice to cut calories without legit starving ourselves. Here are some ways to burn calories throughout the day without breaking a sweat.
1. Skip Stairs
It might sound ridiculous, but going up the stairs burns a lot more calories that you’d think. I mean, you know the feeling of being winded after climbing the subway steps. That shit is a fucking workout. To make stair climbing even more effective, skip a step like some annoying 13-year-old boy. By skipping steps, you’re activating the glute and quad muscles in your legs, which are the biggest calorie-burning muscles in your body. You might look like an idiot, and someone will definitely see up your dress, but you’re basically replacing your 45-minute spin class. Ok, not really, but it’s better than nothing.
2. Do The Public Restroom Squat
If you don’t usually squat when using a public restroom, we’re not judging, but like, ew. If you’ve ever been to an airport and have held to hold a squat over the toilet while peeing, you know how much it actually burns your legs. It’s a great toning exercise and it actually burns calories. So, just pretend you’re always at an airport and you’ll burn calories every time you go to the bathroom. Your butt will probably get toned AF in the process, so I’d start now.
3. Eat Fiber
Foods with fiber are obviously healthy for you, but it turns out they literally help your body burn calories when you eat them. Foods that are high in fiber burn calories—it’s been scientifically proven—because they are harder for your body to digest. So, when you eat fiber-heavy foods like broccoli, oats, beans, and Brussels sprouts, your body needs to work harder to digest and so it burns calories without making you lift a finger. We’re basically giving you permission to order like, three more vegetable sides.
4. Drink Lemon Water In The Morning
If you’ve ever read an interview with any health guru or health-conscious celebrity, they all claim to start their day the same way: with a glass of lemon water in the morning. While we’d much rather skip straight to our cold brew, lemon water has a ton of benefits that will help your body throughout the day. Drinking water on an empty stomach will help flush out any toxins before you eat, and the polyphenols in lemon can help reduce your appetite, so you’re less likely to refill your bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats three times. Try drinking 8 ounces of lemon water before breakfast and you’ll see why Gwyneth Paltrow swears by it.
5. Engage Your Core
For people who don’t work out, this one might be a little confusing, but once you get the hang of it, it’ll be a game changer for your body. The idea is to engage your core when sitting at your desk, walking home, or just watching TV at night. Just like you have to squeeze your core during planks and sit-ups, engaging your core during everyday activities will help improve your posture, strengthen your abs, and burn calories when you’re not even working out. You’re putting in a little more work than you usually would, but then again you’re not making it to the gym today so stop whining.
6. Drink Coffee
In case you needed another reason to drink a shit ton of coffee before your lunch break, here’s another one: it’ll help speed up your metabolism and make you burn calories. Here’s how it works: the caffeine found in coffee is a central nervous system stimulant, and coffee contains chlorogenic acid, which is a compound that may help slow absorption of carbs. So, when you drink coffee, it makes you less hungry and speeds up your body’s metabolic rate. Basically, order the Venti. Your body deserves it.
We all know by now that the number one thing you can do in life to fuck up your skin is fail to take off your makeup properly. That and like, not drink so much alcohol, but only one of those options is truly feasible for the average betch’s modern lifestyle. Unfortunately for those of us who usually come home some combination of tired/drunk and are generally lazy, there are a lot of steps to actually taking your makeup off that go way beyond soap and water. Like, apparently Q-Tips should be involved? I’m honestly shocked. Also I continually fail to understand the presence of cucumbers in our beauty regimens. I mean, I don’t hate it, I just don’t understand it. Which is most things in life, I guess.
While we all hope to come home after work and completely remove every trace of dirt from our pores and thoroughly exfoliate our post-workday skin, we all know that this dream is basically bullshit. In reality you will most likely stumble home at the end of the night, splash water on your face, and walk out of the bathroom with the day’s mascara still fully applied to your lashes.
In order to illustrate this phenomenon, check out Betches Video’s latest “How To Take Off Your Makeup Expectations Vs. Reality” video and be like, “omg this is me.” Subscribe to our Youtube channel for more funny videos just like this one.