2018 is a weird time in the world of fashion. Everyone is wearing the tiny sunglasses from The Matrix, you’re expected to wear bike shorts in public, and now some insane person has decided that we should also be incorporating yellow into our wardrobes. Hard pass. But perhaps the strangest fashion development yet this year are these incredibly fugly LaCroix swimsuits. Yes, LaCroix, as in the flavored sparkling water that half of you love to pregame with, and half of you wouldn’t drink if your life depended on it. I happen to fall in the latter category, but these suits are disgusting no matter what.
LaCroix started to have a major moment a couple years ago, when people apparently first realized that most mixers are, like, not good for you. LaCroix quickly became one of the biggest basic bitch trends, but no one really cares about it anymore. That didn’t stop designer Eric Wu from slapping the LaCroix logo on some swimsuits for summer 2018. I’m not sure this truly counts as being a “designer,” because I’m pretty sure I could make these same swimsuits on any website that lets you customize T-shirts.
introducing ｌａ ｃｒｏｉｘ swim trunks and one-pieces to keep you sparkling at pool parties this summer like it's 1997. order by 05/17 to receive by memorial day 05/28! ⚡️ｇｉｖｉｎｇ ａｗａｙ⚡️ a few of these: like + follow + tag a friend for one entry. multiple tags = multiple entries. announcing winners on monday 05/07! ????: mmntmr.com
So yeah, the swimsuits are ugly as fuck, but to each his own I guess. The suits come in five different ~flavors~, which are Pure, Lemon Lime, Passionfruit, Pamplemousse, and Cran-Raspberry. Sorry to all you psychopaths who like the coconut flavor, no swimsuits for you. You’ll just have to drink that nasty shit in normal clothes like sad peasants. The Pure swimsuit is probably the least heinous, but also I don’t trust anyone who drinks the Pure flavor of LaCroix, so this is really a lose-lose situation.
Luckily, there are LaCroix swimsuits for both men and women, so you can guarantee your place as the most cringeworthy couple on the beach this summer with just one online order. The one-piece is $49.50, and the men’s trunks are $39.50, because of course the one for women has to cost more. Further evidence that you should not buy these swimsuits! If you and your boyfriend both want to wear these together, congratulations, you truly deserve each other. Now get out of my face and never speak to me again.
So yeah, if I see anyone at the beach this summer wearing these LaCroix swimsuits, they’re cordially invited to not be my friend. Hopping on the fun one-piece trend is great and there’s nothing wrong with a fun swimsuit, but the obsession with LaCroix has gone far enough. It’s fucking sparkling water, guys, it’s not that special.
Images: @publicspace.xyz / Instagram; Giphy