For most of us, quarantine has been a welcome break from having to look presentable 24/7. Whether that means going a day or two without showering, or seeing your natural hair texture for the first time since middle school, now is the time to ditch the makeup and just focus on things that matter, like skin care, or your mental health. But while we’re all looking like messes on Zoom meetings, Kylie Jenner is not in the mood for us to see what she really looks like.
Last week, we got an unprecedented glimpse of the real Kylie, when some paparazzi pictures of her looking way more, um, normal than we’re used to went viral. I’m not here to judge whether Kylie looked good or bad, but the complete lack of glam is certainly not how we usually see her. While I loved seeing behind the Kylie Cosmetics curtain, it appears that Kylie is eager to put the photos behind her.
The way that Quarantine has turned Kylie Jenner back into a white girl pic.twitter.com/FQjlTEY95F
— B. Velvet (@BeyonceLeague) April 20, 2020
Exhibit A? Kylie’s Instagram behavior over the last week. Though she’s one of the most-followed people on Instagram, she doesn’t stick any kind of posting schedule. I guess when you have 170 million followers, you don’t have to overanalyze what time of day you should be posting. Must be nice. Anyway, in the first three weeks of April (before the infamous photos went viral), Kylie only posted five times. Two of them were cute posts of Stormi, one was a bunny costume thirst trap for Easter, and only two of them were like, generic hot pictures. My personal favorite is this one, where she sends her well wishes RE: coronavirus, while posing on the driveway in a groutfit. Iconic.
A queen for the people. But since the makeup-free photos got out about a week ago, Kylie Jenner has been all over the ‘gram. In the past three days, she’s posted 10 times, and eight of those are hot solo shots. This is a huge change—she went from going days between posts to sharing something every few hours! Kylie just casually moved into a new $36.5 million house, and she’s posting like she’s determined to take a thirst trap on every couch in that house. Which like, same, except my apartment only has one couch.
Kylie is obviously posting more in the past few days, but she’s also going above and beyond to remind us how hot she is. This video of her arching her back on an outdoor couch, spraying herself with a Kylie Skin product in slow-motion while a Mary J. Blige song plays? I’ve watched it at least 50 times, and it still sends a tingle down my spine. People say this family has no talent, but taking a thirst trap like this is a skill worthy of being on a LinkedIn profile.
So yeah, since those photos surfaced, Kylie’s Instagram behavior has basically done a complete 180. But that’s not all. Over the weekend, Kylie was caught out and about by the paparazzi again, but you better believe she didn’t look like she did a week ago. People all over the internet are saying she staged the new photos, and I have to agree. In the new pics, her hair and makeup are done, she’s got a cute outfit on, and most importantly, the photographer has a clear shot and can’t be more than a few feet away. The shot of her tossing her hair while she puts on her mask is actual art, and I love it.
Not Kylie staging candids after that tweet went viral this week 😭 pic.twitter.com/INe2CNLWEL
— 💎 (@heidiwood_) April 26, 2020
If you follow the Kardashians, then you might know that they have a history of working with paparazzi photographers to get favorable photos. Often, certain photo outlets will edit their photos of the Kardashians to make them look better, in addition to getting the perfect angles and poses. I would say Kylie is a genius for calling up one of her paparazzi connects to make those rough photos go away, except that I’m not stupid and it’s obvious what she’s doing. Also, she—along with the photographer—should just be staying in the house right now. Reminding people that you look hot amidst a pandemic is really not that serious. I hope Kylie doesn’t adopt Ben Affleck and Ana de Armas’ strategy of taking 200 walks a day to get “caught” by the paparazzi, because they’re starting to look like clowns.
Personally, I’m thrilled that Kylie is posting more on Instagram right now, because it gives me more content to make fun of/obsess over, but it’s kind of hilarious that she thinks we’re going to forget what she looked like in those viral photos. And even though her face looked… different… I still can’t get over the fact that she wasn’t wearing shoes! Forget COVID-19, she’s going to get a fungal infection or some sh*t. I have a feeling it’ll be a long time before Kylie leaves the house looking like that again, but at least we’ll always have those photos to treasure.
Images: Kathy Hutchins / Shutterstock.com; beyonceleague, heidiwood_ / Twitter; kyliejenner / Instagram
Today is Kylie Jenner’s 21st birthday, which just makes me feel old. Kylie has been in the spotlight since she was nine years old, and her transformation over the last few years especially has been crazy to watch. It’s one thing to watch a little kid get older, but Kylie has basically looked like a 25-year-old since she was 16. From extreme contouring to her world-famous lip fillers, watching her face morph over the past few years has been a serious trip. Join me for a walk down memory lane, as I examine some important milestones of Kylie Jenner’s facial journey. Lol, my facial journey is just going from having bad skin to having, like, slightly less bad skin. Why am I not famous and/or rich?
January 2014
Our journey today begins way back in January 2014, when Kylie was just a 16-year-old kid. She had obviously been famous for many years by this point, but this is when she really began to transform into the young woman that she is today. In this photo, she’s wearing a lot of makeup and has already started working on her famous pout, but I’m pretty sure there’s nothing artificial in her face yet. Simpler times…
April 2014
This is one of the last photos on Kylie’s Instagram where she actually looks young. Like, I don’t know exactly what happened around the summer of 2014, but I have a feeling it involves a needle and some hyaluronic acid and some swelling, bruising, and soreness. But in this pic, Kylie still looks like kind of a normal teenager, albeit who’s wearing a lot of makeup and way too many necklaces. I don’t know who the other girl in this picture is, so RIP to one of the many Kardashian acquaintances lost to time.
June 2014
Did anyone else forget that Kylie went through an emo girl flannel phase? She looks like every MySpace girl in my ninth grade class, except with professional contouring and lip fillers. Oh yeah, she has lip fillers now, surprise! Her lips definitely look bigger, but they still at least seem normal on her face. Gotta love the green hair, truly a classic Kylie look of yesteryear.
December 2014
Kylie is only 17 in this photo, which is just truly wild. Her lips look even more huge than before, and she also looks abnormally tan. Maybe it’s the lighting, maybe it’s too much self-tanner Also, please note the caption about her rocking her Kylie Hair Kouture extensions, which is a true gem of 2014 culture. Is it just me, or does she look a little like Ariel Winter here?
September 2015
This video is dumb. You don’t have to watch it, I promise. Instead, just appreciate the glory that is this preview thumbnail. Kylie has no makeup on, and she looks like a Real Housewife who just came from a stay at “the spa.” Her skin has that waxy look of having some sort of treatment done, and dear god, her lips. It seriously looks like the doctor just injected her three minutes prior. This was back when Kylie was still claiming her lips were natural, which was comical even back then.
June 2016
In this photo, Kylie had clearly been neglecting the fillers in her top lip. The bottom lip looks like a wonderful, soft pillow, but the top lip looks sad and deflated. Someone needs a little top-up on her Restylane!
October 2016
Oh good, the top lip is looking nice and full again. I’m actually a big fan of this pink hair on her, and the makeup is great, but her lips just look stupid. Like, why did we ever think this was a good look?
May 2017
Circa May 2017, Kylie was still going strong with the lip injections. This was just a few months before she got pregnant, which is a major turning point in the history of Kylie’s lips and American history. With the long, straight black hair, Kylie really looks so much like Kim it’s scary. This is a great look for her honestly, especially with the toned-down makeup. Ugh, she’s so pretty.
July 2018
So Kylie took out all the fillers, huh? Yeah, I’m not sure I really buy that. She made major headlines earlier this summer by claiming that all her fillers are gone, but these just don’t look like her natural lips. I definitely believe that she stopped getting injected while she was pregnant (which is smart, because acid-based fillers haven’t been tested on pregnant women), but I have a feeling Kylie has been hitting the needle again recently. Maybe I’m wrong, but a lip kit billionaire with small lips just doesn’t check out.
So happy birthday, Kylie! We can’t wait to see what you and your lips will do next.
Images: @kyliejenner / Instagram (9)
