Kim Kardashian Addressed Kanye’s Mental Health Struggles In An IG Story

Over the last few weeks, we’ve watched as Kanye West announced his bid for President, maybe dropped out, and then emphatically didn’t drop out, holding a baffling campaign rally over the weekend in South Carolina. Through it all, many have wondered, where is Kim? Aside from a couple of retweets, Kim Kardashian West, normally one of her husband’s most vocal fans, remained quiet about Kanye’s campaign. And beginning on Monday, Kanye West tweeted dozens of messages on a wide range of personal topics, including issues in his marriage with Kim. At first, the family stayed silent about what was going on, but on Wednesday morning, Kim addressed the situation in an open letter posted to her Instagram story, which serves as a reminder that we need to be careful about how we discuss mental health.

On his 2018 album Ye, Kanye revealed that he lives with bipolar disorder. Last year, in an interview with David Letterman, he discussed what it’s like to live with the condition, saying that he gets “hyper-paranoid about everything.” Until now, Kim has chosen not to comment publicly on Kanye’s mental health, and in today’s message, she explains why, saying that she’s kept things private in the past to protect her children and Kanye’s “right to privacy when it comes to his health.”

But in the last few days, Kanye’s mental health has been a worldwide topic of conversation, and Kim decided to speak out publicly. She cites the importance of breaking down the “stigma and misconceptions” surrounding mental health as her reason for responding. Kim specifically notes that those who are “unaware or far removed” from these issues can be “judgmental” of those dealing with mental health crises, but that the situation is far from simple. Because Kanye is an adult, the family doesn’t have any decision-making power in this situation, and Kim clarifies that the “individual themselves have to engage in the process of getting help.”

Kim then specifically addresses Kanye’s struggles, acknowledging that “his actions can cause strong opinions and emotions,” and that his status as a public figure makes him especially subject to criticism. She writes that he is a “brilliant but complicated person,” and that due to his disorder, along with other difficult life experiences, his words often don’t “align with his intentions.” In the last part of her letter, Kim writes that “while we as a society talk about giving grace to the issue of mental health as a whole,” that grace should extend to “individuals who are living with in times when they need it the most.” She thanks those who have expressed concern, and asks that that the media and general public give Kanye and his family the “compassion and empathy that is needed.”

Kim’s letter is an important reminder that there still is a stigma around discussing mental health in our society, and that regardless of your personal opinions on a certain celebrity or figure, we should approach mental health issues with compassion.

Images: Tinseltown / Shutterstock.com; kimkardashian / Instagram

Photoshop Fail Of The Week: Kim Is A Three-Handed Snake

Breaking news: Kim Kardashian shocked everyone today by posting an insanely poorly edited picture of herself depicting an unattainable and unrealistic Photoshopped body type. I know. You can’t believe it. This is just so unlike her to perpetuate the toxic standard for women in today’s society and force regular people to enhance their own bodies in increasingly extreme ways to keep up. With all the good she’s been doing in the world, I really hope this one day spreads to a brand of feminism that does not include destroying little girls’ self-esteem around the world. Anyyyyway. Today, Kim’s post did more than just create unrealistic standards by having her waist size be literally 1/3 of her ass.

I mean, she did that too:

View this post on Instagram

Venomousss

A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

I’m sorry but no, this doesn’t even look real. Both pictures look like her waist has been completely scooped out. And the background near her waist in the second picture looks weirdly smudged. Also, in the first picture, her shadow does not match up AT ALL. But that’s not really why we’re here. We’re here because once again, Kim has created a completely ridiculous body for women to try to attain: now we have to have THREE hands to be sexy!

Wait, what?

Did Kim K. go to the surgeon and get a third hand added to her body (wouldn’t put it past her, tbh)? Or is this just yet another Photoshop catastrophe? Who are you guys hiring to edit your photos? I don’t understand.

Because Kim has a very specific manicure for this photo:

Andddd yet. I count two hands up on the wall. And, as Instagram user @_madisonshelby pointed out to us, there’s also one hand in her hair.

Three. Three hands.

I mean. What the f*ck, guys?

The only way this happens is because the photo editors legit take apart their subject, piece by piece, like f*cking Hannibal Lecter. But instead of making a nice skin lamp, they then add back limbs and body parts in different positions to feel out what looks best. They then try to post it like this is actually their body type, when their waist was cut out like it was done with an ice cream scoop. That, and then they leave extra fingers around. Sloppy, sloppy work. Also, not the first time their editors have accidentally left them with extra limbs.

Guys, here’s a foolproof method to avoid this problem. I’m gonna tell you. Ready? Stop editing your bodies into pieces. That’s it, that’s the secret. It’s also way easier to just take flattering photos than to splice them up for zero (0) reason after the fact.

Kim, I promise you, no one will be shocked to find that your waist actually supports a rib cage IRL. That’s what we all assume (and really hope). That, and it’s perfectly okay to only have two hands. We promise.

In news of body positivity, did you guys see Chrissy Teigen’s recent bathing suit post and ensuing garbage drama? Chrissy—who was a swimsuit model, FYI, and has birthed two children, and looks amazing—posted a cute pic of her awesome body in a swimsuit. And people really commented saying that she isn’t curvy enough and looks like Spongebob.

don’t get too trapped pic.twitter.com/bLp3dlHzIg

— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) April 26, 2020

Which is not only completely f*cking rude, but it’s insane! It’s due to the toxic environment people like Kardashians and FaceTune-obsessed influencers have created for women that it’s no longer acceptable to have a real body type without waist-cinching, giant-ass surgery or editing. And Chrissy called people out on it:

Everyone used to….surgically enhanced curves. I’ve been a square my whole life and let me tell you, it’s paid off nicely in many ways! https://t.co/wuRwGof2sZ

— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) April 26, 2020

BTW, it’s because of these expectations that women feel forced to get crazy surgery and FaceTune their photos and cut them into pieces in the first place. As always, thanks for being real, Chrissy! We need heroes like you in these dark times.

Did you guys notice the extra fingers? Do you think it’s gross that every photoshoot of them seems to be cut up like this? Did you think Kim’s waist looks realistic or is it super obvious to you? LMK! Quick shoutout to @_madisonshelby on Instagram for this submission. I would have never spotted this right off the bat! Please submit your Photoshop detective work always!

Images: kimkardashian / Instagram; chrissyteigen / Twitter

Why Rihanna, Kim K and More Are Begging Texas Not to Kill This Man

Another day, another American true crime story. And this one has all of the (sadly) classic tropes: a seemingly innocent black man, a dirty, seemingly guilty white cop, more dirty cops, and a f*ckton of injustices. America!

The case I’m talking about is that of Rodney Reed, a 51-year-old man who was convicted of raping and strangling Stacey Stites in Texas on April 23, 1996. Twenty-three years later, celebrities like Rihanna, Kim K, Meek Mill, and Oprah are urging Texas Governor Greg Abbott to stop the execution of Reed, which is scheduled to take place on November 20th. Lawmakers from both sides of the aisle have also urged the state to reconsider the case. There is an online petition, which already has over 2 million signatures, that advocates for Reed’s innocence, based on the fact that there are “mountains” of evidence that exonerate him and implicate another man. So, what is this evidence and why has it yet to be seen in court? LET’S GET INTO IT, SHALL WE?

One Click!!! SIGN this petition if you don’t believe the Government should kill an innocent man!!! @GovAbbott https://t.co/L3xrvn7MJO

— Rihanna (@rihanna) November 4, 2019

Texas is scheduled to execute #RodneyReed on 11/20.
We must act now & fight for justice.

According to the @NAACP, Black people make up 13% of the population, yet make up 42% of death row & 35% of the executions.#FreeRodneyReed and sign the petition @ https://t.co/fZWsFQ2mfU! pic.twitter.com/cPdKtcb4EE

— A N G E L A | R Y E (@angela_rye) November 4, 2019

There is an innocent man on death row with mere days before his execution. Please take time out to sign this petition to tell @GovAbbott #FreeRodneyReed https://t.co/u9jfiSFwQh

— Questlove from @SongsThatShook Oct 13th @AMC_tv (@questlove) November 4, 2019

I’ve spent my entire morning reading about this case and yelling at my laptop in-between aggressive sips of my scalding hot tea, so I am what one could call an “expert” at this point. Anyway, let’s start at the beginning. The case is broken down in an interview between Amy Goodman of  Democracy Now and  Bryce Benjet, a senior attorney at the Innocence Project, and Rodney Reed’s brother and sister-in-law (highly recommend checking out if you’re looking for something to take over your entire day).

Here is a quick rundown of the basics: Stacey Stites was found murdered on the afternoon of April 23, 1996. At the time, she was engaged to Jimmy Fennell, a white man who was a cop at the time. He claimed that Stacey must have been murdered after leaving for work in the morning, around 3:00 am. DNA evidence found the semen of Rodney Reed, a black man, on Stites, which at the time was taken as evidence that he had raped her.

However, Reed has always maintained that he and Stites were engaged in a consensual affair, and his semen was from the day before. Others have verified this affair, even those who were close to Stites, but they were not called as witnesses in court (um, k).

It’s important to note that this was 23 years ago, when DNA evidence wasn’t fully understood or at the advanced level it is today, but more on that later. At first, Stites’ fiancé was the primary suspect. He failed more than one polygraph test and eventually invoked his Fifth Amendment right to avoid self-incrimination so he wouldn’t have to keep answering questions. You know, typical innocent people stuff. And again, he was a cop.

Once the DNA test revealed that Rodney Reed’s semen was found on Stites, he became the main suspect. His trial was rushed and his defense was unprepared — his family couldn’t afford to keep their original attorney and were left with others who simply were not ready for such a case. Rodney Reed was found guilty and sentenced to death. He’s been on death row ever since.

Reed has maintained his innocence, and now there is evidence that could prove it. First off, the DNA that was presented to incriminate him is no longer applicable, because the science has advanced and no longer supports the original theory.  According to Bryce Benjet, who is currently working on the case for The Innocence Project, the forensic pathologist, Roberto Bayardo, who did the autopsy, told the jury that this small amount of sperm could not have been there for more than 20 hours — 24 hours after they were found, which would put Rodney at the crime scene.

However, forensics now say that that number is 72. Roberto Bayardo has  retracted his entire testimony and said that the evidence does, in fact, suggest that there was consensual sex between Rodney and Stacey the day before, which is exactly what Rodney has said all along.

And that’s not all. A belt was found at the crime site, which was ripped in half and assumed to be the murder weapon. Back when the crime took place, forensics were not yet able to test murder weapons for DNA. Now they can. And yet, this weapon has not been tested. BUT WHY.

Well, like we said, Jimmy Fennell was a local policeman, and IDK if you’ve heard, but cops are known to protect their own. It can’t be said officially, but if there is a way to test a murder weapon for DNA evidence, and the black man on death row is begging the courts to allow it, but they are refusing, and the other suspect is a white ex-cop…yeah, you do the math. I’m no Olivia Benson, but seems like the police force doesn’t want the weapon to be tested because they’re not certain their fellow cop’s DNA won’t be on it.

So who exactly is this Jimmy Fennell guy? SO FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK:  He’s a former cop who, after this case closed, ended up in prison for kidnapping and raping a woman.

OH, INTERESTING.

And, while he was in jail, he allegedly confessed to a fellow inmate that he killed Stacey Stites. And according to Reed’s attorneys, they have a sworn affidavit from this inmate that they would also like to enter into evidence. OH, OKAY. Did you think that was all? Nah. Apparently, Fennell was a raging racist (shocker) who had threatened to kill Stacey Stites before the murder occurred. In a short documentary film called A Plea for Justice (Yoooo, Netlfix, u up?) Alicia Slater, a friend and former coworker of Stacey Stites, claims that when she asked Stacey if she was excited to get married to Jimmy Fennell, she said “not really” and told her about an affair she was having with a black man, ANDDDDD expressed fear over what Fennell would do if he ever found out about said affair.

There are even more bonkers details about this case that clearly point to Fennell as the murderer, like a history of violence that came up in the case that landed him in jail, alleged witness intimidation by the local police force, inconsistency in Fennell’s alibi, as well as proof that his timeline doesn’t add up, cops in the original case who were later found to be dirty cops and convicted of further crimes, and more. But I simply do not have the word count for it all.

This sure seems like “reasonable doubt” to us, which should demand another trial and at the very least, take a man for whom there is even an ounce of doubt is guilty of murder off death row.

I’m waiting on the Netflix doc for this one, but in the meantime, you can sign the petition to stop Rodney Reed’s execution, which is, again, scheduled for November 20th, 2019 (that’s like, so soon) here.

Oh, also it was an all-white jury that convicted Rodney Reed, okay byeeeeeeee!

Images:  CBS (1), Twitter (1), Giphy (2)

 

Kim Kardashian Is Selling Her Old Stuff On eBay, But Why?

It’s been over a decade since the Kardashians entered our collective consciousness, and at this point, we’re no strangers to the Kardashian business empire. With Kris Jenner at the momagerial helm, the Kardashians have started dozens of business ventures, raking in billions of dollars and becoming some of the most famous people in the world. Kim Kardashian alone has lines of makeup, perfume, shapewear, and sunglasses, among other things. Forbes estimates that Kim’s net worth is around $370 million. Basically, she has more money than anyone needs, and she could never work again if she didn’t want to. So naturally, I was intrigued when Kim posted on her Instagram story this weekend that her latest eBay auction was live. If you’re thinking “wait, Kim Kardashian sells her stuff on eBay?”, then you’re not alone, because I was confused too. But like the dedicated Kardashian follower that I am, I swiped the f*ck up right away, and what I found sent me down an entire rabbit hole.

Kim Kardashian has used eBay for a long time, and the site says her account was launched on October 11, 2002. But before we even get to the types of items that were being sold, let’s talk about something a little more pressing: her username, kimsaprincess. At first, this might seem like some forgotten AIM screen name from the 2000s, and based on the fact that her eBay account dates back t0 2002, that’s probably not far off.

But I had heard that name before. A quick Google brought me back to an article I wrote in March of this year, when Cardi B received backlash for applying to trademark “Okurr.” In doing some digging about celebrity trademark applications, I found that all of Kim Kardashian’s trademarks were filed under the company name “KIMSAPRINCESS, INC.” It was funny then, and it’s still funny now. It seems strange that Kim never started a new eBay account once she got famous, but who has time to keep track of one more password? I, for one, am very glad that kimsaprincess still exists in 2019.

But aside from the iconic circa 2002 username, why does this eBay account actually exist? In the description for the account, Kim clarifies that there’s a philanthropic side to her eBay page. She says, “A percentage of the proceeds from all my auctions benefit the Buried Alive Project.” The Buried Alive Project is an organization dedicated to reforming the criminal justice system, particularly the practice of giving life sentences without parole in nonviolent, drug-related cases. It’s an important cause, and one that fits in perfectly with the legal work that Kim Kardashian has thrown herself into this year.

But I’m no fool, and I’ve learned not to take anything the Kardashians do at face value, whether it’s photoshopping a picture, or giving money to charity. The phrase “a percentage of the proceeds” feels intentionally vague, and I wanted to find out more. Kim Kardashian first did a public auction on eBay in May of this year, and numerous reports at the time stated that Kim would be donating 10 percent of proceeds to the Buried Alive Project. 10 percent is better than nothing, sure, but I’m pretty unimpressed. Based on that estimated net worth we talked about before ($370 million, in case you forgot), why is Kim keeping 90% of the money from these sales for herself?

I totally get the idea of selling or consigning your clothes and accessories if you don’t want or need them anymore, and obviously normal people make money from this all the time. But Kim Kardashian isn’t a normal person. If Kim is going to charge $4,000 for a Birkin that she’s used for an unspecified period of time (her eBay page is oddly light on details about item condition), she should probably just let it go and take the loss. She could literally afford to buy like a million more of them, so it feels kind of skeezy to set the donation amount so low.

In May, Kim sold over 170 items on her eBay page, and then a bunch more this weekend. It feels pretty strange to scroll through photos of clothes that Kim has worn, and some of the photos are kind of hilarious. For example, these Balenciaga velvet boots that are also pants, which A) sound v uncomfortable and difficult to get into, and B) look kind of like a saggy diaper in this photo. But considering that these retail for around $3,000 (seriously), kimsaprincess is really offering them at a bargain price.

Kim posted about her latest eBay auction just a day ago, but all the items have already sold. Apparently there are people out there who can just drop $4,000 on a handbag, not that I’m jealous or anything. Now, there’s only one item left on her eBay page, and it’s a strange outlier when compared to the designer shoes and dress she usually sells. If anyone is in the market for a $25 wig, Kim Kardashian is your girl:

I’m truly not sure how this ended up on her eBay page, and I checked like three times to make sure I didn’t somehow end up on a different scammy page claiming to be Kim. Nope, it’s the real thing! Kim still has nine of these babies left, so grab one while you still can, I guess.

But if you’re sad that you missed Kim’s eBay auction, there’s another place on the internet where you can also buy her used crap. Just last month, Kris Jenner announced the launch of Kardashian Kloset, a dedicated shopping site where the family sells their designer clothes and accessories. The site has dedicated collections from Kris, Khloé, Kylie, and Kim, with a Kourtney collection coming soon. I’m not sure how Kim decides what to put on her eBay page and what goes to Kardashian Kloset, but there’s one very important distinction between the two: Kardashian Kloset makes absolutely no mention of money going to charity.

Look, people can do whatever they want with their money, but the Kardashians do not need any more money as long as they live, so this whole thing just feels icky. The family selling dozens of items for hundreds or thousands of dollars, and just laughing all the way to the bank. While this money is a drop in the bucket for them, they have fans who are probably maxing out their credit cards to get a handbag that Kylie used once. The family isn’t responsible for anyone else’s actions, but it sort of feels like they’re preying on their fans.

But honestly, the money situation might not even be the most egregious thing about Kardashian Kloset. More than anything, I am haunted, seriously haunted, by the choice of mannequins for the listings on the site:

 

Every single piece of clothing on the site is photographed on these mannequins, and it’s upsetting. I know I criticized kimsaprincess for the saggy photos of clothes on hangers, but literally anything would be better than this nightmare fuel. Also, unrelated, but Kris Jenner has an unbelievable number of gowns like this that look the exact same. What can I say, the woman is consistent. Three days from now, her dress from Jennifer Lawrence’s wedding will probably pop up on here.

So what’s the takeaway from all of this? Whatever your feelings are about famous people selling their stuff online, it seems like 10 percent of the money going to charity really isn’t too much to ask. I understand that it’s exciting for fans to have the chance to own these pieces, but the Kardashian family just doesn’t need this as a source of income. That being said, I guess you should shop on Kim’s eBay, rather than Kardashian Kloset, because at least some of the money is going to a good cause. Or just like, don’t. It’s just stuff, and Kim probably never even wore half of these things.

Images: kimsaprincess (2) / eBay; Kardashian Kloset

A Timeline Of Kim Kardashian’s Face Through The Years

Kim Kardashian has now been in our lives for a very, very long time. We’ve seen her adapt from an Armenian princess who cleaned celebrity closets to the Illuminati cyborg clone we know and love. Kim’s changed her style a lot over the years, but somehow not as often as she’s changed her face. We literally could do a whole series on each of the Kardashian/Jenner clan and their ever-changing faces, but for now we’ll focus on Kim. (Although my favorite Kardashian is Khloé, because she’s sassy.) And remember, if it weren’t for Kim having sex on camera and Kris Jenner being a marketing genius, none of these people would have careers. Let’s take a look at how much has changed since Kim first came into the limelight.

2006

Ah, 2006 Kim. She looks so different here, it’s insane. This is actually even before KUWTK, when she was simply holding Paris’s handbags and cleaning her closet. The good old days, if you will. Who would have thought Kim would turn into who she is now?

2007

This is the year KUWTK started. Kim decided that the real essential to her look would be very dark glitter eyeshadow. But the nude MAC Lipglass stays. This is also when Kim discovered fillers.

2008

Kim figures out how to give herself a forehead! This is actually how I remember Kim in general: like, she’s cute, dating Reggie Bush I think, but very much still looks like a naturally pretty Armenian girl. This is before the white-washing begins.

2009

2008 Kim to 2009 Kim isn’t even the same person??? Like, what exactly has happened here? I want to say she had a nose job, but her nose looks the same. Her skin is way lighter, so I don’t know if this is like a skin-bleaching regimen or she just learned to use sunscreen like the rest of us. Her lips definitely have a bit more filler, but it’s nothing compared to what’s coming up.

2010

This is the year that every woman thought they could be Angelina Jolie with enough injections. It doesn’t work that way. I know this because this is exactly what my mom also looked like that year: puffy and her face doesn’t move correctly. Yikes.

2011

Ok, THIS is the year of the nose job (it looks way thinner) and when Kim really, really needed to lay off the fillers and botox. Look at those eyebrows! She’s an inch away from cartoon movie villain. Maybe it’s just the spidery bottom lashes, but she looks a bit scary.

2012

Oh good, this is the year that Kim learned to blend. These must be the Kanye years. It also seems like she laid off some of the fillers (except for her lips, for sure).

2013

Kim lightens her hair and gets a better makeup artist. I actually still really love this look. I don’t know if it’s just the softer eye makeup and the lighter hair, but she’s looking very, very different to me from the last pic. Is her nose the same? Her skin even looks way lighter to me too? How is this the same woman??

2014

LOL remember how I said Kim looked way lighter in the last photo? Kim has now eschewed her Armenian heritage completely. Her nose looks even thinner, but I’ll guess it’s a contour. Did we do contours in 2014? We must have, because her face looks way thinner and more chiseled too. Or I guess that could be fillers? She’s gotten very thick, Muppets-y eyelashes from 2007 on as well. IDK.

2015

Kim’s lashes and lips keep growing. She explores vampy looks. She lays off the cheek and brow filler (highly recommend) but adds more to the lips. I am rapidly losing interest in this. Is anyone still reading this?

2016

Kim decided that while Kylie was building her billion dollar empire on having huge lips, Kim would be the queen of zero lips. Not a great look, Kimmie. Also, her forehead is a different color than the rest of her face. She looks very, very pale. Also, her eyeshadow is from The Lion King. That is all.

2017

Kim gets a tan and is a blonde. I hate the roots on this wig. I don’t mind roots showing with intention, but at least blend a little. Her eyebrows are super thick for this look. Her nose and cheeks look super different as well? Like, the nose is way thinner? Is this another nose job or a contour? I can’t even tell with these people. The cheeks are so big and sharp they could cut glass.

2018

Kim’s lips are huuuuuge compared to 2017. Maybe she had just gotten them done. I do like when Kim decided to go more natural with less makeup and dark, casual waves. But is it considered more natural when it’s 100 pounds of foundation and lighter makeup? Or more natural when she’s walking around with a gigantic mane of fake hair? IDK?

2019

And here we are, our current Kim K. She looks a bit… puffy to me. It’s v similar to 2010 with all the fillers. But what’s really crazy is that this woman now has completely generic features compared to her 2006 counterpart. I mean:

Do these people even know each other? They don’t really even look related. And if you want to see a GIF of Kim’s faces over the years, here it is:

Which Kim is your favorite? Do you think her face has changed a lot? What do you think about celebrities that white wash themselves once they’re famous? LMK!

Images: Getty Images

Kanye West Got In Trouble In Wyoming For The Dumbest Reason

In case you haven’t noticed, Kanye West is like, obsessed with Wyoming. Last year, he spent months there recording with artists like Kid Cudi and Pusha T, and he and Kim Kardashian recently bought a 4,500 acre ranch there. It has the lowest population of all 50 states, which might be why he likes it so much—less people to argue with. But he is getting in trouble with the actual state of Wyoming, and it’s for the dumbest reason.

Over the weekend, Kim Kardashian posted a video of Kanye speeding across the prairie in an ATV. Honestly, I didn’t even know there were places in the US that looked like this—it looks like something straight out of The Lion King. In the video, there are several antelope running in front of them, which I also didn’t know were a thing in the US. It’s crazy that things exist outside of cities! You can hear Kim saying that Kanye is scaring the antelope, and it does kind of look like they’re being chased.

And that’s where the issue arose. Apparently, it’s not chill to run down wild animals in your ATV, and the Wyoming Game & Fish Department told TMZ, “state laws prohibit this type of animal harassment…The department was made aware of Kim’s. video and paid a visit to the manager of Kanye’s new ranch to make sure everyone is aware of the rules pertaining to wildlife.”

“PAID A VISIT.” HAHAHAHA. Imagine being the Wyoming employee whose job it is to go knock on Kim and Kanye’s front door. Do you bring a muffin basket? Do you wear your cutest pair of biker shorts? If that were me, I’d literally be sh*tting my pants. Also, imagine being the “manager” of Kanye’s new ranch. That’s like the Wyoming equivalent of Kris Jenner, and I need to meet this person. Basically, I’m just fascinated by everything about Wyoming, and I need to know more.

According to TMZ, a source close to the couple said that “Kim and Kanye were simply cruising along when the animals came running by,” and “came to a slow soon after the vid.” Yeah okay, I don’t think Kanye was literally tying to kill an antelope or anything, but I’m going to reserve judgment until one of the antelope comes forward to tell its side of the story. It’s only fair.

I’m gonna need the Keeping Up With The Kardashians crew to get their asses to Wyoming ASAP, because if they miss any more Kimye on the prairie shenanigans, I’m gonna be upset. I can’t wait for the episode when the entire Kardashian Krew visits them in the middle of nowhere and complains about there being dirt on their Louboutins. It’s what we deserve.

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Wyoming Nights

A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

For now, there hasn’t been any formal complaint filed in the case of West v. The Antelope & The State of Wyoming, so there’s not any real investigation happening. But if there was, he could be fined up to $435. I bet he’s super scared!

Images: Shutterstock; Giphy; kimkardashian / Instagram

Kim Kardashian Wants To Be A Lawyer. What, Like It’s Hard?

You know when you wake up one morning and think, “Wow, I’m one of the richest, most famous women in America…time to become a lawyer!” Oh sorry, is that not relatable? Well, this is apparently what happened to Kim Kardashian-West, because she is currently in the midst of a four year apprenticeship to become a lawyer. So basically, the next season of KUWTK is going to be boring as f*ck.

California is one of the few states where you do not have to go to law school in order to take the bar exam, so Kim won’t be attending Harvard Law, which is kinda too bad because contrary to my previous comments that would actually make an amaze Keeping Up With the Kardashians/Legally Blonde crossover ep. Keeping Up With the Legally Thic? Someone write that down.

Anyway, Kim’s newfound passion for prison reform has inspired her to get her law degree and attempt to pass the bar exam. As you may recall, Kim played a major role in convincing Trump to grant clemency to Alice Marie Johnson, who was serving a long sentence for a nonviolent drug crime. Looks like Kim found a passion is this case and wants to take things to the next level. Let’s hope she continues to use her fame and riches forces for good like she did with the case of Alice Marie Johnson.

Could this all be a big publicity stunt? Lol, this is a Kardashian we’re talking about, so yes, obviously. But at least it’s a publicity stunt that helps people? Kim told Vogue that she plans to take the bar in summer of 2022, so we’ll just have to wait and see how this all pans out. Here’s to hoping that when I inevitably get arrested one day I am able to yell, “I wanna speak to my lawyer…Kim Kardashian-West!”

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A Ranking Of Kim Kardashian’s Exes

Hey friends, it’s a big day. Today, October 21st, is the birthday of my personal idol and savior, Kim Kardashian. Or, more accurately, Kimberly Noel Kardashian-West. Mama KiKi is 38 years old today, and it seems like things have never been better. She’s rich AF, she has three beautiful children, and she’s still the hottest person on the planet (don’t @ me). The only thing that’s wrong? Oh yeah, her husband has lost his godd*mn mind. Things have been rough in Kanye-land these past few months, and people have even been wondering if Kim would leave him over his pro-Trump views. I doubt this will happen, but now seems like a good time to revisit some of Kim’s past relationships. I present, without a shred of scientific evidence, a ranking of Kim Kardashian’s exes.

5. Damon Thomas

It’s easy to forget about Kim Kardashian’s first marriage, because nobody GAF about Kim when she was married to Damon. But the story here is pretty sketchy. First of all, Damon is 10 years older than Kim, and they eloped when she was just 19. Okay, ew. They were married in 2000, and filed for divorce in 2003. They’ve kept quiet about the marriage, but their public divorce papers are really bleak. Apparently, Damon was super controlling, pushing Kim to get plastic surgery and spend less time with her family. Kim was also reportedly a victim of domestic violence, which is really sad. Thank God Kimmy got out of there when she did.

4. Ray J

Ah yes, Ray J. To be honest, I almost forgot about this relationship, even though it’s really what started the whole Kardashian empire. Ray J really ain’t sh*t, but it’s hard to be worse than the abusive husband. When the infamous sex tape came out, Kim filed a lawsuit about it, which makes it seem like Ray J was probably the one who leaked it. This is obviously not cool, and Kim reportedly settled the lawsuit for $5 million. Good job Kim, get those coins.

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B L O O D L O V E @rayjnprincess @princesslove @melodylovenorwood Photo by @shannonlaurine Styled by @hollylarry_

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3. Nick Lachey

Get ready for a throwback. Way back in 2006, Nick Lachey briefly dated Kim, right after he split up with Jessica Simpson. At the time, Kim was just a stylist, and the People article about them dating is hilarious. In the headline, Kim is just referred to as Nick’s “new gal,” which truly shows how much the world has changed since 2006. Kim, you’ve come so far. I’ve always liked Nick, even if this relationship wasn’t anything important.

2. Kris Humphries

Everyone can probably agree that the 72-day marriage was not Kim’s finest moment. It’s hard to say if anyone was really at fault here, but obviously this relationship was not ever meant to be something serious. I was never impressed with Kris, considering that he looks and acts like a caveman, and their relationship was a little too perfectly designed for the KUWTK cameras. He doesn’t seem like a bad guy necessarily, but I don’t really have any idea what he’s up to these days, nor do I care.

1. Reggie Bush

Let me be real, I kinda miss Reggie? He and Kim were together for years, and their relationship was a central part of the early seasons of Keeping Up. At the time, he was always really busy with his football career in New Orleans, and things didn’t work out. They split for the last time in 2010, and he subsequently married another Armenian, dancer Lilit Avagyan. What can I say, the guy has a type. He seems happy these days, but his years with Kim will always be a golden age in my mind.

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Morticia

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Kim Kardashian has definitely been spotted out with some other randos throughout the years, but I tried to hit all the important spots. Do you think Kanye will be an ex in the future, or will Kimye stick it out forever? There’s no way to know, but for now, I just hope Kim has a nice birthday.

Images: Shutterstock; @rayj / Instagram; @lilitslife / Instagram