If you’re familiar with our Photoshop Fail series, or really just if you ever go on Instagram, you’re probably familiar with the time-honored Kardashian tradition of Facetuning the sh*t out of all their pictures. From slimming their waists to stretching their legs, the Kardashian-Jenners have used every editing trick in the book to convince us that they look like completely different people. And out of this whole over-smoothed family, Khloé Kardashian is the Facetune warrior at the forefront of face-changing technology.
The problem is, Khloé clearly doesn’t know where to stop when it comes to editing her photos. Over the last six months of quarantine and social distancing, we’ve all found new ways to keep our minds occupied, and lucky for us, Khloé has provided our brains with a fun logic puzzle: struggling to recognize her in every single photo she posts. This year, she’s taken the photo editing to a whole new level, so much so that when this photo popped up on my explore page last week, I actually did a double take before realizing who it was.
Yes friends, that is Khloé Kardashian, from the shoot for her new collaboration with Ipsy. I don’t know what kind of editing software they used here, but it looks like she went through some bizarre algorithm that’s supposed to make you look like Beyoncé and Ariana Grande at the same time. Who is this woman, and how did we get here?? Let’s take a walk down memory lane—or at least back to May of this year.
When Khloé posted this set of photos, the internet reaction was intense, with many people proclaiming that Khloé had gotten a “new face” in quarantine, and others pointing out anomalies like the mysteriously missing necklace chain, her eyes being too large (and uneven), her massive, extremely white teeth, and her signature beauty mark not being visible.
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I always suspected that there was more editing going on here than plastic surgery, and the other shoe dropped in August, when Khloé was shown in a KUWTK confessional interview from the same day. Same outfit, same hair and makeup, but her face looks almost completely different. So, for all the guesses about her quarantine procedures, it turns out Khloé just edited the f*ck out of her photos, as usual. Did she not realize we were all going to see a video that would expose the editing?
But while her photo from May was one of the more viral instances of Khloé’s photo editing addiction, it’s far from the only face she’s introduced us to on the ‘Gram. Last September, she posted this photo that honestly makes me physically uncomfortable to look at. Not only is her skin way too smooth, but her eyes are a telltale sign of too much Facetune. No one’s eyes look like that. The whites are way too white, and the irises look like they’re glowing from the inside. Idk why people insist on doing this, because it looks unnatural AF.
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In February of this year, Khloé switched things up again with this overly edited shot featuring her in a denim bodysuit and bob haircut. Her makeup looks flawless, which is probably mostly real, but KoKo’s face is just not that symmetrical, and her jaw is not that sharp. We all have eyes!
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This example from August is an interesting one, because it’s a pic of Khloé with True. Thankfully, Khloé didn’t Facetune her toddler, but she was up to all her usual tricks when it came to her own appearance. It’s a grainy selfie, but she definitely still smoothed her face and enlarged her eyes. But more importantly than the technical breakdown, she just doesn’t look like herself. That’s the problem with Khloé’s Facetune usage—it’s one thing if you edit all your pictures to look like the same version of yourself. But something is wrong when I have to double check every single time that it’s actually Khloé.
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And just last weekend, Khloé kept us guessing once more, with these photos featuring her in latex pants and a printed corset. She looks amazing, except for the fact that her face has been remixed yet again. She looks extra tan like in her Ipsy photo shoot, but gone are the high cheekbones and eye shape that made her look like a completely different person. In this post, she actually included videos from the shoot, which would normally be a Facetune giveaway, but there’s clearly a heavy filter over the video, so Khloé may actually be getting smarter about her tactics.
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Man this heat wave is intense!! Isn’t it October??? Lex, This ones for you 😉
The wild thing about all this is that at the end of the day, I don’t even think Khloé Kardashian has had much plastic surgery done. I’m sure she’s played around with fillers, and maybe some light procedures here and there, but for all the fuss about her getting a “new face” every couple of months, it really all comes down to editing. The issue is, we all see Khloé on TV and in photos that haven’t gone through her editing process, so she’s not actually fooling anyone! But still, I’m excited to see what new and interesting editing tactics she can come up with next.
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Images: Vivien Killilea/Getty Images for Abyss By Abby; khloekardashian, Ipsy / Instagram
While most people have been obsessing over Kylie Jenner’s breakup with Travis Scott, I personally have been focusing on Khloé Kardashian. That is mostly because Khloé has once again gone dark on IG and disabled all comments after posting a photo of herself where she looks virtually unrecognizable. In other news, the sky is blue! The photo in question is a sultry selfie that could be Khloé but also could be a random VSCO girl she found on the internet to pass off as herself and thought we wouldn’t notice. Well guess what, Khloé? WE F*CKING NOTICE. Fans are saying the photo is an egregious use of FaceTune, and while I’m inclined to agree (seriously, her photo editing skills are a crime against humanity), I’m starting to wonder if this selfie, along with countless others, isn’t just a terrible filter or Khloé projecting the fun-house mirror self-image she keeps in her mind unto the masses via a sh*t ton of FaceTune. Maybe Khloé Kardashian really did get an entirely new face.
I know what you’re thinking:
florals for spring Kardashians getting plastic surgery? Groundbreaking. But the thing is, Khloé has adamantly denied having any work done over the years. Back in April, Khloé took to Instagram to be petty AF when responding to fans who commented that perhaps she had gone a bit overboard with recent plastic surgery. I mean, her exact response went something like: “lol, oh man… but sure whatever you want to believe,” which is actually the exact wording I use when my sister confronts me about stealing her shirt and I am definitely wearing said shirt as she puts me on blast over the phone.
Look, I’m of the mind that anyone living within a 50 mile radius of LA has probably had some plastic surgery done, the Kardashians included. And can we really blame them? If I lived in a city where the most skin you were allowed to cover in public was 12 cubic inches then I would also like to look permanently airbrushed at all times. But what do I know? I’m just a 27-year-old woman who spends her free time presenting elaborate powerpoint presentations to my dog on Kardashian conspiracy theories.
ME TO MY DOG AS I WRITE THIS ARTICLE:
But I guess I’m not the only one with this theory about the Kardashians because according to Dr. Manish Shah, a board certified plastic surgeon in Denver, Colorado, Khloé Kardashian has definitely had some work done. “Khloé Kardashian has certainly undergone some major physical changes over the years,” Dr. Shah said. And while some of these changes can be attributed to weight loss (she is killing it with her workout regimen and she does have the
receipts Insta stories to prove it) and normal maturation (aka losing her “baby fat”) the rest definitely involves some cosmetic enhancements.
We asked him to look at a few of Khloé’s most recent Instagram posts and weigh in on if he thought these are just the result of a very warped understanding of photo editing or the work of a skilled plastic surgeon. Here’s what he had to say:
On Her Rumored Nose Job
Look, I love KoKo, I really do, but the nose that’s been showing up on her face in her most recent Insta posts look less like the one she was born with and more like the one He Who Must Not Be Named debuted after his resurrection. I’m sorry, but it’s true!! It’s been rumored for years that Khloé might have gotten a nose job, and just last year Khloé herself even admitted that she’s always wanted one, but that she was “too scared” to go through with it. Her stance has always been that she’s just really good at contouring but, like, I’ve never been able to contour my face so good that I could successfully enter myself into Witness Protection and not even have to change my name. Dr. Shah agrees. “It’s clear that she has had rhinoplasty to give her a much more contoured nose,” he said. “Her original nose had a much wider tip and bridge. This nose is sleek.” And it does look sleeker. So sleek that I have to believe there’s more being done to that face than just going to town with a bombass highlighter.
On If She Has Lip Fillers
“Although Khloé never had thin lips, it seems as though some filler has been used to sculpt them in such a way as to make her face as proportional as possible,” Dr. Shah said. He also thinks she’s had some fillers added to her cheeks to give them more shape and definition, which would make sense considering Khloé used to have a rounder face and now her face has more angles than an isosceles triangle. These seemingly new face angles can also be attributed to some work she might have had done on her jawline. “Before, her jawline was very heavy, and seemed to weigh her face down. Now, it is very balanced, delicate and feminine,” Dr. Shah said. “This could be the result of liposuction of the jawline, in tandem with weight loss, and perhaps some artful fillers to give the jaw the desired shape.”
On Her Other Enhancements
Like any good girl from Calabasas, Khloé has also probably dabbled with Botox. “Her forehead is completely smooth,” Dr. Shah said. “That would indicate Botox. Her eyebrows are also in a higher position which could also indicate that they have been elevated by strategically placed Botox.” Dr. Shah thinks she may have also undergone a skin tightening treatment like radiofrequency (a technique that uses radio frequency energy to heat tissue and stimulate collagen production in order to reduce the appearance of fine lines or loose skin). Either way, Khloé looks absolutely unreal these days (no, seriously, it’s absolutely not real) but if it’s making Khloé feel good as hell, then who am I to judge?
So there you have it! Definitive proof that Khloé Kardashian has had some plastic surgery. Sort of. For those of you who are shocked by this turn of events, I think you should also know that the Easter Bunny isn’t real either. It’s just your mom buying discounted CVS candy and whatever else was featured at the checkout aisle at 2am the night before. Kisses!!
Images: @khloekardashian /Instagram (3); Giphy (1)
Let’s be real—Khloé Kardashian has had kind of a rough year. Her baby daddy cheated on her many times, most notably with one of her best friends, she’s now raising a daughter on her own, and we’ve accused her of Photoshopping her photos many, many times. Okay, she deserves the last one, but whatever. Unlike most people, who deal with their feelings by overeating, seeing a therapist, or just having a good cry, Khloé likes to express herself through one of my favorite bygone forms of communication: subtweets and emo Instagram stories.
Khloé’s Instagram and Snapchat stories are a mix of adorable family photos, questionably edited thirst traps, and text posts screenshotted from god knows where. Thankfully, all of Khloé’s stories have been preserved by @khloesnapchats on Instagram, because someone has to do the Lord’s work. Today is Khloé’s 35th birthday (I feel old), so let’s raise a glass to some of her most iconically emo posts.
Let’s start, of course, with a classic that KoKo posted in the immediate aftermath of the Jordyn Woods scandal. Obviously, Khloé’s world, along with her relationship with Tristan, was crashing down, so it’s understandable that she was really upset. I might not have gone with the Taylor Swift snake tactic, but to each their own.
Idk if this is an ancient Chinese proverb or something, but the message is clear. Back in the day, my favorite subtweets were always the ones that were 100% obvious who they were directed at. Like, okay Shayna, we all know that your “cryptic” tweet about relationships is about the deadbeat father of your child, it’s not that hard to figure out.
Here’s another one of my obvious faves:
Hmmmm what could this one possibly be referring to? Silly me, it’s probably about Scott. Idk if Tristan Thompson is actually watching these stories or not, but Khloé knows exactly what she’s doing here. Also, I love that the background and formatting of this looks like something that my stepmom would have shared on Facebook in 2011. Great aesthetic choices all around.
But while I love an obvious subtweet moment, it’s also a pleasure when Khloé Kardashian gets a little deeper with her messaging. Take, for example, this little gem that KoKo posted earlier this month. Honestly, her Instagram story is a damn self help book.
I love the way the millennial pink pairs with the message that growth can only happen from intense emotional pain. So fun!! I can just imagine Khloé sitting in her mansion, searching “revenge quotes” on Pinterest. Seems like a healthy pastime.
Here’s another lovely bit of word salad, which I’m not positive I understand:
I’m not sure if Khloé is advocating staying in a shitty relationship just because the person likes you, but “real is rare” really has a nice ring to it. Khloé Kardashian is definitely the kind of person who posts something like this and then feels like she’s really shown the haters who’s boss. Which like, she’s way richer than me, so maybe that’s the truth.
There’s nothing KoKo likes better than a good zinger, like this one about the fragility of men’s egos:
She’s really not wrong.
At the beginning of this article, my intention was to break down what all of these posts could be about, but that seems a little less fun now, because I’m realizing that they’re all. About. Tristan. Like, I’m not saying that Khloé shouldn’t be upset about the disintegration of her relationship with the father of her child, but I feel like it would benefit her to move on a little bit. I’ve made my love of subtweets clear, but it can only make her feel so good to post sh*t like this:
But at the end of the day, it’s Khloé Kardashian’s birthday, and I’m not here to tell her how she should feel. We all deal with trauma in our own way, and Khloé’s preferred method is indirect clapbacks on social media. Cheers! Hopefully 35 for her is a year of finding happiness, whether that’s in a new relationship or just with her daughter and all her millions of dollars. HBD KoKo!
Images: Shutterstock; khloesnapchats (6) / Instagram