Even if you don’t use Facebook as much as you did a few years ago, there’s no denying that most of us are still pretty addicted to it. I mean, how else am I supposed to see what my high school ex’s gross current girlfriend is up to? The Facebook News Feed always has some great
updates from friends and family memes, but sometimes it’s tough to sift through things you don’t want to see. Thankfully, Facebook’s newest feature, Keyword Snooze, will make it easier to avoid content you don’t want to see, whether it’s Westworld spoilers or another status from your gun-loving Uncle Rick.
Keyword Snooze is here, and it sounds almost as tempting as the snooze button on my morning alarm. Hopefully it won’t make me late for work like that snooze button, but I’m really good at finding new and different reasons to be late. Keyword Snooze lets you pick out certain words and phrases that you want to be blocked from your News Feed for 30 days, so it’s the perfect amount of time to catch up on a show that you don’t want spoiled. And if everyone you fucking know is getting engaged, you can Keyword Snooze that shit so you don’t have to see the proposal pic, the staged engagement photos, the engagement party, the #cantwaittomarrythisman… BRB, I have a few Keyword Snooze tags I need to set.
Facebook also lets you Snooze specific people, which is basically like a more savage version of the Keyword Snooze. A full Snooze is basically just a convenient way to block an annoying AF family member without making things awkward at the next big holiday gathering. Like sorry Aunt Janie, but I don’t need to see seven statuses a month about how “libtards” are ruining this country, thanks but no fucking thanks. Snooze and Keyword Snooze are basically my dream tools, because I’m incredibly petty but I don’t want to block someone, but then not be able to stalk them later to see how much better I am. Isn’t social media great?
So yeah, Keyword Snooze is still brand new so we’ll see how well it actually works, but I could definitely see this coming in handy in the near future. It looks pretty easy to use—basically you just find a post you don’t like (not hard), hit the “options” button, select “snooze keywords from this post”, and then snooze whatever annoying keywords you don’t want to see, like for instance #cantwaittomarrythisman (can you tell I hate that hashtag??).
Look, this is Trump’s America during Bachelorette season AND wedding season—I’m sure you can find plenty of shit to Keyword Snooze.
So have fun out there Snoozing people’s annoying statuses, or just go back to scrolling Instagram like you were before. Either way, all this shit is owned by the same people. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯