If you didn’t already think time was a social construct, the last six months have probably changed your mind. The movie you said you watched last weekend? That was two months ago. And the tweet you thought you saw last week? It was posted today. Since we’re all online literally all day and have nothing better to do than run a new meme into the ground hours after it’s created, new trends come and go faster than ever before. While the banana bread and sourdough baking phase is probably seared so permanently into your memory that you’ll be telling your grandkids about it when they ask about 2020, there are probably a few trends and moments that have already been erased.
The Carrot Challenge
Approximately two days into quarantine, everyone was apparently already so bored that they resorted to an Instagram challenge where they tagged their friends to draw a carrot on their story. It is truly remarkable to look back at this moment in time and realize how naïve we were that we could have possibly thought that was the worst it was going to get.
This feels like something from an entirely different time, back when there was still hope (aka mid March). Thanks to one of the first TikTok trends to pop up in quarantine, people everywhere were using the 20 minutes that they’d usually spend commuting to the office to whisk coffee into a froth. Given that I haven’t heard anything about this in a few months, it seems like people have now realized that time is better spent sleeping in.
this quarantine is really testing the limits of what photos make the cut for a throwback post on instagram
— Betches (@betchesluvthis) May 8, 2020
Another long-forgotten trend is the “Until Tomorrow” era, a time when you couldn’t open Instagram without seeing a feed full of embarrassing photos, bad selfies, and baby pictures (that would be taken down the next day to avoid total humiliation). Personally I think taking your photo down is a weak move, since true Instagram baddies have had embarrassing photos up since 2010 and never took them down no matter how bad (and over-filtered) they were.
“First Photo” Challenge
As I’m sure all the other single people quarantining alone would agree, this challenge felt like a personal attack. Seriously, couples posting their first pics together? Like, did I ask for every other Insta story to remind me that I’ll be riding out a pandemic alone and getting dressed up for FaceTime dates for the foreseeable future?
Remember that week (or was it a month? Who knows) where you got a notification every five minutes that someone was going live on Instagram? Including the girls from high school “running their own businesses” showing you how to use their essential oils? My thoughts and prayers go out to everyone who accidentally joined someone’s live where there were only two other people watching. Leaving one of those is almost as uncomfortable as the split second of eye-contact you make with your boss every time you exit a Zoom meeting.
“See 10, do 10?” Yeah, I’m good thanks. I haven’t done a push-up since I was forced to for the fitness test in elementary school, and I won’t be picking those back up because someone tagged me in an Instagram story.
The memory of Tiger King feels like a fever dream. Like, we were really so desperate for entertainment at that point that we just ate that sh*t up and said “NEXT, PLEASE.” It’s kind of incredible that we got desensitized to the absurdity of every single event that happened in that series so quickly. But given how f*cked up everything has become since then, it was good preparation for coping with the rest of the year.
Zoom Happy Hours
if you're still scheduling 14 zoom happy hours every weekend you can chill, we all just want to sleep
— Betches (@betchesluvthis) April 24, 2020
Realizing that having a Zoom happy hour every night of the week does not make up for real-life interaction was a breakthrough that took longer than it should have. Playing drinking games at home is fun when you have somewhere to go afterward, not when you’ll just be sitting in your childhood bedroom, totally wasted, after you shut your laptop.
The “One New Thing A Day” Phase
I’ve been thinking a lot about the people who started quarantine by saying “I’ll be making one new cocktail a day!” or “Every day I’m going to make one new piece of art!” Where’d they go? Last I heard from them it was day 14 I think. Are they okay?
Instagram challenges and TikTok trends will come and go, but you know what will never go out of style? Wearing a f*cking mask.
Images: Mollie Sivaram / Unsplash; bigkidproblems / Instagram; betchesluvthis / Twitter
A job interview is your one opportunity to get a real understanding of what your future place of work will be like. Maybe you peek around the corner while you’re walking to the interview room, checking to see if people at the office look like they are functioning members of society, or at the very least, if there are free snacks in the kitchen.
Because this only gives you like, two seconds to scout out where you could be spending
literally all your time 9-5, you should probably ask some questions during your interview. At the very least, maybe you can figure out if you’re going to get gray hairs from the stress of working at this salt mine start-up. Or if you’ll be BFFs with your co-workers going to SoulCycle during lunch. Let’s hope for the latter.
Half the time during an interview, questions come at the end. You’ve already spent the last hour answering things like, “tell me about yourself” aka “what the f*ck have you done with your life” and “why do you want to work here” aka “what kind of answers can you come up with, besides the fact that you need the money for rent?” Still, mustering up some sort of energy to show interest will show Susan from HR that you’re the super boss betch we both know you are. And even if you don’t care to find out about the company culture (weird) you like, have to ask questions at the end because you’ll look bad if you have nothing to ask. Here Are the top five questions to ask during an interview. And for more career advice, order our third book, When’s Happy Hour? How To Work Hard So You Can Hardly Work, out now.
1. What Is This Position’s Day-To-Day Like?
This is one of the best questions to ask during an interview to give you a picture of what this job will actually be like. Everyone prefers a different working style. Some love to be social, on the phone all day selling to customers. Others prefer to have their favorite podcast on while diving all analytically into a spreadsheet. Either way, we are modern women knowing what we want. Although some jobs may have a bit of both, understanding what you’re actually going to be doing all day will help you avoid wanting to gauge your eyes out with the pink pen you bought from Paper Source.
2. Who Is Your Ideal Candidate For The Role?
You know that moment at sample sale where you find a f*cking expensive purse at half price? That’s what this question is to you. Gold. Literal gold. Here’s why: this question gives you the opportunity to understand exactly what the hiring manager is looking for in a role. You can then respond with something like, “I love that you mentioned x, y and z capabilities because I feel like my skills really align due to blah blah blah”. This question basically gives you the opportunity to say you are perfect for the job, while using the same language the interviewer is using.
If you only have time to ask one question during an interview, honestly, ask this one. It won’t let you down.
3. What Are The Main Challenges For Someone In This Role And This Industry?
I’m basically just giving you questions to ask during an interview to understand what you will f*cking hate about your job. JK, we’re supposed to *want* to be challenged right?! Rise up to the top and sh*t?!
Understanding what hardships you will face in your job (even if it’s just remembering other people’s complicated af Starbucks orders) will help you decide if this role is even right for you. I know you are desperate to buy those new winter booties (me too), but interviewing should be a two-way street! It’s not all about the money—you really want to think if you’ll be happy in this role, or if you’ll be job hunting in three months because you hate your life.
4. What Is Your Management Style Like?
Have you ever heard the quote, “people don’t leave jobs, they leave managers”? It’s something I wholeheartedly believe. You could be in your dream job, but if you don’t jive with your manager, you will feel more trapped than Kendall Jenner at Fyre Festival. Whether a manager is micro, macro, or just psycho, this question should give you the opportunity to see if whether or not you’re going to be a corporate slave who’s literally never been out of work in time for happy hour.
5. Do You Have Any Reservations With Me Moving Forward In The Process?
TBH, I’m actually a crazy person and usually leave a takeaway during the job interview. At the very least, ask this question to understand any concerns the interviewer has about moving forward. This ALSO gives you an opportunity to get feedback and know how long you’ll have to wait to see if you got the gig (which I’m sure you did, you baller, you).
If your interviewer does have reservations, take this time to politely object and share that you’d love to learn about any skills you don’t already possess. You know, personal growth and sh*t.
Finally, you should ask about the next steps in the process, this way you’re not harassing the recruiter every week when you haven’t heard back. This will also make you sound eager to move forward, but like, in a good way.
Questions give you the chance to listen and reply back with more information on why you will rock the f*ck out of this job. Answer thoughtfully while listening carefully and you’ll slay your interview so hard, the interviewer won’t even know what hit them. Now who’s ready for happy hour?! Tequila shots on me.
For more career advice, order our book When’s Happy Hour?, out now!
Images: Shutterstock; Giphy (2)
So, you wake up one day and realize you’re not in college anymore and off daddy’s bankroll—now what? You actually have to start your life and be a functioning member of society. That’s f*cking terrifying. Jumping into the work world can seem super intimidating… because it is. But you’re a badass betch—you just need to get your sh*t together. To help you, we had Ryan Serhant chat with us on our When’s Happy Hour podcast. Here are his top tricks for being successful even when you don’t know sh*t. And for more advice on how to be successful, pre-order our third book, When’s Happy Hour?, out October 23rd.
Okay so that sounds really cheesy and something you’d find on a freshman dorm wall, but like, this actually works in the context of selling products or yourself. Ryan notes that a lot of people like to wear the “salesman (or woman, it’s 2018) mask”, but that legit never works. Try and actually make a human connection by being your who you actually are (deep). Introduce yourself to the person, ask how they’re doing, and compliment them (cause who doesn’t like a compliment). Ryan always says, “No one likes to be sold, but everybody loves to go shopping with a friend.” When was the last time you bought something from that creepy guy who stalked you around the shelves of Nordstrom’s? Never. Be friendly and normal-ish, even if it kills you.
Ryan is stunning, so he hardly ever feels insecure—but would you know when he was? Even if you wake up in the morning feeling like hot garbage, you can’t let anyone know that. “Some people are just good at not showing —and those are the most attractive people because they don’t give a sh*t,” Ryan explains. Another sexy factor? Being smart. Ryan tells us, “Knowledge is the sexiest thing about anybody.” Let me backtrack, though—make sure you’re knowledgeable about your industry. Like, it’s not going to help if you know a sh*t ton about how to roll a joint when you’re working for an investment banking firm.
Do Your Research
Being smart also doesn’t come from just sitting on your ass, drinking wine, and petting your dog (I wish). You have to actually put an effort in. Ryan says that’s what can really get you ahead in your career: “you just have to do the work, which most people don’t want to do.” People in the industry for 10 years longer than you rely on their experience, which you clearly don’t have, so you have to work twice as f*cking hard to show them up. Research everything you could possibly need to know about the product you’re selling or place you’re interviewing for. You never want to be stuck on a question or have to think about it. Your ability to be smart AF and whip out the facts faster than you whip out rosé on a Friday will make people trust you.
Learn To Network
Okay just seeing the word “network” makes me slightly vomit in my mouth. But you kind of have to suck it up and do it. Ryan assures us, though, it’s not as scary as you think. His favorite method for reaching out to people is through social media (duh). “If there’s a client or developer I want to meet, I don’t just go through email. I follow them on Twitter or DM them through Instagram, or see what they’re doing on Facebook,” Ryan says. Once you’ve found someone you’re interested in learning from, send them a nice message and keep it professional. Tell them you’re a fan of their work, pat the ego. Offer to buy them coffee to ask them a few questions. They might be rich, but who doesn’t love free sh*t? Point is: kiss their ass and prove you’re worth their time, bringing us to our next point…
Always Offer Something Of Value
If you’re meeting with a potential client or boss or asking for a raise, make sure you have something to offer. Yeah, you can say you work hard, but that’s like, what you’re actually supposed to do. You’re not meant to pass out on a Tuesday at your desk, Jennifer. Tell them how great you are at what you do and share your experiences, but keep it to strictly work experiences. A huge pet peeve of Ryan’s is when someone tries to get their way with a sob story. Nobody f*cking cares. Negotiating by making it about yourself on diminishes the value of your work.
For more tips on how to f*cking kill it in the work world, listen to our When’s Happy Hour podcast below!
And pre-order our book, conveniently also titled When’s Happy Hour. For more of Ryan, check out his new show Sell It Like Serhant.
Want more honest career advice other than things you should never put on your resume? Pre-order our third book, When’s Happy Hour? out October 23rd!
While you’re climbing up the ladder to boss betchdom, at some point you’ll probably have to apply for a job. Unless you’re planning on pulling an Elle Woods and sharing a
borderline pornographic classy bikini pic of yourself to get noticed, you’ll have to create a badass resume. The worst feeling, (yes, worse than finding out Colton is the new Bachelor #teampeter4ever), is applying for a job online, only to get a rejection letter 24 hours later.
Us betches *should* be good at resumes. I mean, we’re really good at
bragging talking about our accomplishments, so shouldn’t we be good at putting it all on paper? Not always. If you want to avoid this rejection that vaguely reminds you of all of your middle school years, I got you. I’ve compiled all the things you should never put on your resume. I see a crack in that glass ceiling already.
1. An Objective
As much as you want to f*cking yell your lifelong career goals (a corner office, a Rachel Green approved hot assistant, millions of Instagram followers), adding an objective statement to your resume will not do you any good. It’s not only as outdated as your pink RAZR flip phone (RIP), it also can corner you into a career path completely irrelevant to the job your applying for.
The best thing you can do within your resume is SHOW how your past experience will relate to a future role, specifically the role you are applying to. We’d recommend including numbers, results and specific examples of your past success. That will be the best example of why you should be chosen for a job.
2. Your Age Or GPA
Although you’re obsessively taking collagen and sneaking off to Botox appointments during lunch, your work is one place where you don’t want to seem young. I mean, it’s great—flattering even—if during happy hour the bartender needs to check your ID. But on your resume, you DON’T want someone wondering if their future employee is even legal.
As depressing as this is going to sound to all you college students unless you’re in some sort of academic career, no one gives a sh*t about your grades after college. So you can skip class today and start drinking like you wanted to anyway.
Instead, fill your resume with work experience and something an employer can relate to, not an arbitrary number that could have been given out because you liked to wink at your dreamy TA. At least, that was my strategy for getting good grades.
3. Irrelevant Work Experience
…If I had a penny for every f*cking time someone told me to say “relevant”…I’d literally be Kim K. But we’re not in the Kardashian clan (just obsessively watching them) which means we have to be really good at staying *relevant*, and here’s why.
When a recruiter or hiring manager is reading your resume, you want them to be able to picture you in the role. This means leaving off your high school babysitting jobs (although I’m sure those kids were a ton of work). Keep your resume experience related to whatever job you’re applying to. If you really want to be the overachieving betch I know you are, use buzzwords from the job description online and insert them into your resume. You’ll be so much more relevant (trying not to vom, but it’s TRUE).
If this is your first job or you’re switching industries, no problem. Find times in the experience you do have (like internships, school projects) where you did work most relatable to the job you are applying for. Worst case, show that you can be a proactive leader—capable of having at least some sort of responsibility and not just keeping your Postmates app active so you can order Taco Bell.
This is the time where I tell you to go over your resume with a fine-tooth comb. Send it to your sugar daddy, your real daddy, your baby daddy…whoever, and catch all those pesky little spelling errors. No one is ever going to trust you to write an email on their behalf, let alone handle any sort of responsibility, if you have written mistakes in your resume. This is supposed to be your *good* first impression.
Believe me, this is coming from the girl who literally almost didn’t graduate college because she couldn’t pass a grammar test (true story), and somehow I was able to find tools to post this article mistake-free (have you ever heard of the internet?!), so I’m pretty sure you can figure out how to do this too.
5. A Second Page
Unless you’re a f*cking CEO, make your resume a clean single page. No one has time to read that much about you—sorry not sorry—you’re not *that* special. You literally might be the future Kanye of our generation, but your future employer doesn’t know that yet.
This means putting the most recent, impressive experience on your resume. Think of it like the thirst trap pictures you post of yourself on Instagram rather than the ones your Aunt Judy tagged of you on Facebook. Instead of focusing on just putting a sh*t ton of experience on your resume, focus on what you did in those experiences. Did you drive any sort of success in the role? Did you create something new? Are there numbers to back it up?! You’ll seem like a way more impressive betch if you include recent experience where you made an impact. Rather than a ton of random experience that doesn’t showcase your skills.
6. Your Salary Requirement
Even though you permanently imagine a rose gold pedestal underneath your feet at all times, don’t make this clear in your resume. In reality, we’re all basically begging for a job so we can afford another $25 cocktail at the trendiest spot. I have no doubt that at some point you’ll be able to demand millions, but today is not that day. Keep the salary discussions to in person and you’ll be good to go.
I can’t wait to see the big things you do with your new and improved resume. I’m pretty sure you’ll have employers literally sucking your d*ck, calling you nonstop to come interview with them. Just promise me you’ll put the name “boss betch” outside your corner office one day. Oh, and send me a personal thank you note.
Don’t forget to pre-order our THIRD book, When’s Happy Hour? now! It’s all the real career advice you won’t get from like, your guidance counselor.
I don’t know about you, but this heat wave is seriously fucking me up. After spending all winter becoming one with my couch, I was really ready for another four months on my couch to get back out there this summer. Instead, I’m finding myself yearning for the days when lying under a blanket didn’t feel like entering a sweat lodge. SO: even though we all get a pass on going outside this week, summer should be your most social season—and dating is no exception. Sunlight makes people happy, happy hours make people drunk, and drunk, happy people have more fun on dates. It’s basic math. Of course, not all summer dates are created equal. So while you’re fielding texts from Hinge matches, keep in mind that many invitations are still worth ignoring. Here’s what these date locations say about your date’s intentions.
Their Local Coffee Shop
In non-summer months, this has potential to be a fine option if you’re on antibiotics. It’s easy to cut short, requires minimal dressing up, and is overall a low-cost alternative to meeting for drinks. And going to the guy’s usual local spot can give you a sense of his overall vibe, though the implication that he’s hoping you’ll go home with him obviously stands.
During the summer though, this invite is all kinds of sus. If they’re trying to meet you at 2pm on a Saturday down the block from their apartment, they likely haven’t left their apartment in six weeks and will be rolling out of bed, wiping Cheeto crumbs off their shirt, and contemplating cancelling five times before they finally walk down the block. Oh, and they’ll probably try to steer the “date” back to their place to continue whatever TV show they were binging within 30 minutes of meeting you. With all the outdoor options and day-drinking venues summer has to offer, if the best they can do is a non-alcoholic beverage in their zip code, they either don’t give a shit about this date at all, have no social life to speak of, or both.
Picnic In The Park
Whether or not this is a red flag is kind of subjective. If you’re a fan of watching ants climb all over your food while dodging Frisbees, enjoy! (Yeah I hate picnics. Sue me.) The plus side of a picnic invitation is that it’s (meant to be) romantic, so the person who suggests this is definitely making an effort. The downside is that they require a ton of work to pull off effectively. So in Scenario A, your date shows up with a small suitcase worth of supplies (coolers, something to sit on so you don’t get grass stains, etc). While sweet, it also makes it painfully evident how much effort they put in and could be a turn-off early on. It also makes it impossible to continue the date afterward because they’re carrying around 10 pounds of picnic supplies.
In Scenario B, your date brings two 99 cent cans of Arizona iced teas and nothing else, you’re both covered in sweat and grass stains within 10 minutes, he gets embarrassed and tries to act like you’re too high maintenance to cover up that he planned a shitty-ass date. Ultimately, inviting you to a picnic means they’ve thought about this date way too much (and have probably done this exact date with their ex) or way too little. You can appreciate the gesture, but I do not recommend going on this date.
^The last time someone actually enjoyed a picnic.
Rooftop Bar With Their Friends
This is also kind of a mixed bag, but for different reasons. If they invite you to this a few days in advance, it’s ideal. It likely resembles the weekend plans you would have made for yourself anyway, and it means they want you to meet their friends. Win-win. If they invite you to this while they’re already there, it’s a very different story. This means they got drunk and horny, and are too awkward to actually meet someone at the bar full of equally drunk singles. Instead, they started going through their phone and messaging their last week of matches. While the commitment to not meeting people is admirable, you’re better than this. Being available on-demand for whenever they’re done with the social part of their night and just want to get laid is never a good look.*
*If you’ve been on a few dates already, this could be a cute “had a few drinks and started thinking about you” type text. But keep an eye on whether they actually introduce you to their friends when you show up, or if they just try to hustle you home.
Weeknight Dinner Reservation
Like the coffee date, this is normal/fine other parts of the year. But IMO, scheduling an 8pm dinner on a Wednesday is a little formal for a summer date. Has he never heard of happy hour? And is he just expecting you to waste prime drinking hours just to exchange information about your siblings and hometowns over cloth napkins? This date option implies that they’re highly traditional, operate by a strict schedule, and are probably not that much fun. This holds especially true if the restaurant they choose also offers a happy hour menu and they purposely choose not to do it. Who hurt you????
Their House In The Hamptons
This date is the easiest to decode. If they invite you to their house in the Hamptons, MARRY THEM. Seriously. Lock that shit down before the next heat wave rolls through.
Ultimately, dating in the summer is easier than dating in the winter. But because we can’t have nice things, that doesn’t mean some red flags don’t apply. Summer is the time to be your most fun self, taking advantage of long summer nights and half-off drinks. If their best self doesn’t crave margaritas after 12pm from June-September, think carefully whether this is someone you’re interested in dating. And maybe give your number to the people you see out at your favorite summer bars instead. At least you know they have good taste.
Images: Giphy (5); Jelleke Vanooteghem / Unsplash
Summer is coming, and with beach days and pool parties come sweat, humidity, and sunburn. Unless you want to look haggard af and not be cute enough to get into the rooftop pool bars (is this a thing everywhere?), you need an arsenal of beauty products on hand at all times. You should be focusing on pounding margs on a weekday that you called in sick to work, not how to hide your very obvi pit stains in the 110 degree weather. Not to mention, nothing—and I mean nothing—makes me more miserable than when I am too hot. If I am overheated and hungry, there is a good chance someone will die. Stay cool and chic no matter what the sun does to you with these summer beauty products.
1. SPF and Cooling Setting Spray
Get a makeup setting spray to stash in your purse (they even come in mini versions) to keep your makeup from melting down to your cheekbones in the worst of humidity and sweating. Make sure it has SPF, so you can reapply sunscreen without fucking up your makeup, and you won’t get the oh-so-sexy sunglasses burn halfway through happy hour. Bonus points if it’s also cooling and smells good to cover up the smell you get when you’re outside for long periods of time that I can only refer to as “recess”. You fucking know exactly what I’m talking about. This one from Supergoop! is my fav. It smells like rosemary and mint, keeps your cat eye on point, and is SPF 50. Btw, I hope you’re not still paying full price for shit at Sephora right? You can find a mini version of this pretty often as a points reward, so it’s technically free.
SUPERGOOP! Defense Refresh Setting Mist Broad Spectrum SPF 50
2. Mini Deodorant
I don’t care if it’s summer or not, always, always carry mini deodorant—and perfume, for that matter—in your purse in case of emergency. I can’t think of a single thing that will make me blind-rage-hate you faster than having to smell your B.O. because something happened—like, idk, it’s hot out—and you are sweating. Please spare us the grossness by taking fucking showers before hanging out with me, and also, bringing backup. This mini deodorant is natural and smells like vanilla, so it won’t give you cancer and will cover your scent.
LAVANILA The Healthy Deodorant Mini
3. Waterproof Mascara
Is anything sexier than raccoon eyes from your mascara dripping down your face? Fuck yes, and it’s literally everything else in the world. Spare yourself the nasty mascara goop thing that happens when you’re sweating or excessively oily by investing in a good waterproof mascara. This Dior one is the best, mostly because it isn’t flaky like many other waterproof formulas and goes on pretty much exactly like the regular, except it’s bulletproof and impossible to get off. But like, in a good way. A good waterproof mascara will take you from your 9-5 to happy hour at the beach to getting hammered and jumping in the ocean to accidentally killing a guy and hiding the body, without a single under eye crease. Idk, I don’t know your life.
DIOR Diorshow Waterproof Mascara
4. SPF Lip Balm
Your lip skin is super delicate and can be burnt just like any part of your body. Especially in the heat where you’re sweating, dehydrated, and probs not drinking enough water, you want to load up on the lip balm. Prevent your lips from burning, which fucking hurts and makes them peel and crack and look repulsive, with a thick af lip balm with SPF. This Jack Black one lasts forever and is mint flavored so it’s soothing and will disguise your margarita breath. But like, also bring Listerine strips or breath mints, you heathen.
JACK BLACK Intense Therapy Lip Balm SPF 25
5. Sea Salt Spray
My rule when it comes to dealing with humidity is to embrace the frizz instead of piling on so much oil product that you look like a drowned rat. A sea salt spray creates texture and gives you chic Serena Van Der Woodsen beach waves with little to no effort. Also, it’s way easier than trying to straighten your hair and the humidity giving you a fucking crease halfway through the day that you can’t fix. This set from Sephora has a few different ones to try so you can find what works best with your hair.
SEPHORA FAVORITES Instant Texture Dry Styling Spray Collection
6. Evian Spray
This is extra, but if you’re bougie af, it’s really a have-to-have. This mini Evian spray is sooooo refreshing and keeps your skin hydrated throughout the day. Especially if you’re outside for a while—think walking anywhere, sports games, beach days, theme parks, etc. It’s great to have on hand to cool you down quickly before the sweat ruins your blowout.
EVIAN Brumisateur® Natural Mineral Water Facial Spray
Images: Emily Goodhart / Unsplash; Sephora (6)
Betches may receive a portion of revenue if you click a link in this article and buy a product or service. The links are independently placed and do not influence editorial content.
Spring is a turning point of mental vitality. Your inner Instagram model emerges, you start craving fruitier alcohol, rompers, photos of yourself in a bikini, and of course, rooftop bars. Seasons are changing and you’re growing into a more mature woman. Part of this is realizing that going to ratchet warehouse parties in Bushwick is getting old. And getting wasted in dark, one-story bars is just not your aesthetic anymore. You decide it’s time to move your drunken nights from Brother Jimmy’s to a more sophisticated environment.
Well, call me Christopher Columbus (or maybe like, a less problematic explorer) because I have discovered the perfect place to get classy shit-faced and fulfill your spiritual journey. Enter Bar Hugo: an upscale rooftop situation 20 stories above who you used to be.
Bar Hugo is one of the few rooftop bars with super Insta-worthy views of NYC and the Hudson River. There’s really nothing better than a city view while you’re sipping your drink *in a real glass* to amp up your sophistication level. Plus their decor is sleek and stylish. It’s like, the ideal drink-in-the-air, sunset, cityscape, Boomerang-cheers background you could ask for. Everything about it screams, “I’m a grown AF classy bitch”. So basically the perfect place to get your Insta lit. And go ahead, use that quote as your caption too.
What’s obviously THE most exciting thing about Bar Hugo is their extra long happy hour (5pm-9pm), with beer for $5, wine for $7 and well mixed drinks for $8. I mean, talk about a steal. It’s basically free. So you really can get classy shit-faced.
But here’s how you actually get free booze. If you reserve a table (15+) for a birthday celebration, you get a FREE Hugo Bowl. Which is literally a giant sparkling margarita. It’s made with award-winning tequila brand, Código, freshly squeezed lime juice, triple sec and a bottle of YES! Prosecco. WTF, right? If that doesn’t say come get classy shit-faced, I don’t know what does.
Written By Zoey Miller
In partnership with Bar Hugo
Images courtesy of Bar Hugo
If we know how to do one thing, it’s happy hour. We also know a thing or two about prepping to go from the office to happy hour, and lucky for you betches we’ve rounded up the best alcohol-infused beauty products to get you ready for your next one. The best part? The use of these products won’t cause you an agonizing hangover the next morning, and are in fact perfect even when your plans don’t involve alcohol (so, almost never).
1. OUAI Rosé Hair & Body Oil
The Kardashian’s OG hair stylist Jen Atkin created this moisturizing rosé-inspired oil that you can use daily, all over. It definitely gives new meaning to “rosé all day”. The oil smells like rosé and bergamot (aka absolute heaven), and absorbs super fast so it illuminates both your hair and skin without making either too greasy or shiny.
2. Bröö Craft Beer Moisturizing Shampoo
If throwing back cheap beers with your coworkers is your idea of a good happy hour, then reach for Bröö’s Craft Beer Moisturizing Shampoo. It’s actually infused with freshly hopped craft beer. As crazy as it sounds, the malted barley in beer is actually full of vitamin V, proteins, and minerals to make your hair shiny and strong. Looks like the frat bros in college were on to something with all of those beer showers at football tailgates.
3. Yes To Shower Cocktail Revitalizing Body Wash
If you’re a liquor gal who prefers a shower cocktail over a shower beer, Yes to’s body wash cocktail actually detoxifies your skin without intoxicating the rest of you. The boozy body wash is packed with lemon, ginger, and epsom salt to cleanse your skin and leave you smelling super sweet.
4. Melon Daiquiri 3-in-1 Shampoo, Shower Gel, & Bubble Bath
For the days where you wish you were drunk on a beach somewhere (which, let’s be real, is probs everyday) then there’s Philosophy’s Melon Daiquiri 3-in-1 Shampoo, Shower Gel and Bubble Bath. At least you can smell like a frozen daiquiri (minus the alcohol), even if you can’t be drinking one on the beach. The shower gel has hints of melon, watermelon, and lime juice to make your skin and hair feel soft and smell fruity, in the best way possible.
5. TonyMoly I’m Real Red Wine Sheet Mask
We’ve all heard about the health benefits of drinking red wine: it’s an antioxidant, it promotes healthy cholesterol levels, it prevents coronary heart disease, etc. Thanks to TonyMoly’s red wine sheet mask, we’ve learned that red wine is good for your skin, too. The sheet mask uses red wine extract to purify and tighten your skin, and reduce the appearance of your pores in about 20 minutes. Who would’ve thought that during all those years spent slapping/chugging bags of Franzia and ending up with horrendous hangovers, you could’ve been using that wine to take care of your pores?
6. Demeter Gin and Tonic Fragrance
Now you can smell like your fav summer cocktail, which, if that sounds like it’d be horrible then just think of it as like a hair of the dog situation. But we swear, this perfume actually does smell good—it’s like a crisp, fresh scent with a citrusy twist. Just spritz it on when you’re super fucking hungover before you head to brunch, and you’ll feel better faster than you can say “Can I get a bloody, please?”
7. Buxom Full-On Lip Cream in Blushing Margarita
When you’re ready to go from office professional to thirsty Thursday thot, swipe on Buxom’s Full-On Lip Cream in Blushing Margarita. That hot guy across the bar will 100% fall drunk in love with your pout. What’s more, the full coverage liquid lipstick will stay on even if you get drunk enough to end the night with an intense PDA-filled makeout sesh.