Even though the winged eyeliner look may be on its way out (deal with it—it had its moment), that doesn’t mean liquid eyeliner is a thing of the past. Nothing will give a betch quite so sexy of an eye than a thick, dark liquid liner accentuating her already stellar mascara/fake lash skills. But getting that line just right and NOT having it resemble a preschool art project is a task in and of itself. Luckily, there are a few liquid eyeliners out there that even a dumbass non-makeup-wearing fugly slut can figure out. What would you do without us?

1. Stila Stay All Day Waterproof Liquid Eye Liner

The super fine point and dark pigment makes for an idiot-proof eyeliner pen. Plus, it’s waterproof, smudge-proof, and stays all motherfucking day without cracking or ending up on the top of your lid.

2. Soap & Glory Supercat Eyeliner

Super easy to apply, intense color, and the ability to do fine or thick lines make this a great buy for anyone who is better at rolling out of bed and putting on sweatpants than they are at putting on any semblance of makeup.

3. Eyeko Skinny Liquid Eyeliner

If you want to SEE your eyes a lil better without drawing on an Adele-like cat line (enough already), this is your shit. It also won’t dry out after five or six uses, so it’s worth the nearly $20 price tag. And it’s a fav of betchy betch Alexa Chung, so we’ll take it.

4. L’Oréal Paris Super Liner Perfect Slim Intense

Gotta love L’Oréal and their arsenal of easy-to-use and CHEAP beauty products that are actually decent quality. This liner is fab for beginners looking to do a cat eye (we assume for Halloween) or just add a bit of definition.

5. NYX The Curve Eyeliner

Do you suck at holding an actually liquid liner, resulting in a smattering of shitty curved lines and dots? This shit is literally shaped for your sausage fingers, allowing you to create a smooth and precise application.

6. Max Factor Masterpiece Glide & Define Liquid Eyeliner

If you’re a diehard fan of regular eyeliner and haven’t jumped on the liquid bandwagon just yet, this is for you. It’s easy to apply and won’t smudge all over your face. 

I may or may not have talked a little bit about my ongoing battle with the woman who works the checkout counter at Sephora. Let’s call her Sheila for the sake of this article. The root of my vendetta against Sheila probably has something to do with the ridiculous amount of money I spend on eyeliner. Because let’s face it, I would be nothing without my eyeliner. Mostly because it enhances the Bitch in my Resting Bitch Face, but also because it serves as a sort of last defense against the psychopaths commuting from Brooklyn to the city. I sincerely believe my on-point eyeliner is the only reason why tourists do not ask me stupid questions like “will this train get me to Brooklyn” when they’re standing on the Manhattan-bound side and it fucking says it on the sign right in front of them, or when children don’t try and start some shit with me for stealing sitting in the open subway seat. So yeah let’s talk about eyeliners. Drugstores actually have some really good shit in there—and for a price that doesn’t make me want to question my priorities more than my mother already does. So here are seven eyeliners you can buy at any drugstore that won’t break the bank (take that, SHEILA):

The Best Eyeliner For Cat Eye

Trying to perfect the cat eye technique is a bigger mind fuck than listening to a fuckboy try and evade the question of “what are we?”

And, like a fuckboy, my cat eye technique only does what I want it to do every day that is not Friday or Saturday. Like, some days I look like a very, very distant relative of the Hadids and other days I look like Jenny Humphrey after she became a drug dealer and it’s really a toss-up every morning. That being said, Physicians Formula Felt-Tip Eye Marker is going to be your go-to for all things cat eye. This fine-tipped marker goes on super soft instead of super pigmented, which makes it perfect for attaining those bedroom eye goals. 

The Best Eyeliner For Color Range

CoverGirl, aka a brand The CW is low-key keeping in business by shamelessly plugging the shit out of their products, has the best eyeliners for color range. We recommend using the CoverGirl Perfect Point Plus, which comes in more color selections than Kylie Jenner’s wig room. Our three top picks are charcoal (perfect for taking your look from office professional to happy hour hoe), and if you’re feeling more adventurous, hunter green and midnight. 

The Best Eyeliner For Smokey Eye

Like the cat eye, the smokey eye takes actual patience and work, which is the last fucking thing I want to do when I’m drinking alone in my room getting ready to go out. Like, I can barely drink wine while trying to take a decent filtered AF picture for my Snap story so my ex and the three fuckboys on my rotation will know exactly what they’re missing, and you expect me to also be good at making sultry eyes too?? That’s a hard no. But the Rimmel Exaggerate Eye Definer makes a smokey eye v v easy. Not only is it a retractable pen, but it also comes with its own smudging tool and sharpener so it’s like three things for the price of one. Praise Be. 

The Best Liquid Eyeliner

WARNING: do not attempt to use liquid eyeliner after half a bottle of wine a casual night in watching beauty YouTube videos. You will look like this, and I of course know nothing about this from personal experience:

Using liquid eyeliner is an art form that I’m convinced should count as an accepted skill on your professional resume should you be one of the few that can pull this off. And Maybelline’s Line Stiletto liquid eyeliner is the best one in the game. It glides on easy and gives razor sharp lines with zero dragging. Plus it can stay on throughout a nuclear bomb night out with your friends.

The Best Eyeliner Endorsed By Celebs

I had to include this category because celebs are doing this new thing where they pretend they’re peasants just like us and visit CVS’s for beauty products and not just for opportunities to be spotted by the paparazzi being “real” and “normal.” Lol, K. But I also love them for this because I will buy any and all beauty products that celebs pretend like their assistants don’t buy for them. That being said, Reese Witherspoon’s makeup artist revealed that Reese would be nothing without L’Oréal Infallible Lacquer Liner (my words, not hers) and I squealed like a Belieber because apparently I only need to spend less than $10 to look like Elle Woods and that is a dream come true right there.

The Best Waterproof Eyeliner

Obviously I had to include this category because I’ve noticed this strange phenomenon where on any given weekend night after 2am, creatures start to prowl the streets of Manhattan looking for shitty pizza and their dignity. Ya know, the ones that look like this:

That’s where Rimmel Scandaleyes Waterproof Kohl Liner comes in. Use this product if you don’t want to turn into an (iconic) internet meme. This eyeliner is the best of both worlds because it gives you a creamy formula while also staying on through a night of vodka sodas, shitty street pizza, and a search for your missing dignity.

The Best Pencil Eyeliner

I will never understand the type of person that uses pencil eyeliners. Is it just me or do they seem sort of archaic? Like some sort of medieval tool Cersei would use to torture one of her offspring with? I mean, we live in a world where people can literally order alcohol to be delivered to their homes without moving from the couch, we don’t need to be stabbing sharpened pieces of wood at our eyes anymore for the sake of beauty. But I guess some of you masochists like this sort of thing so I’m including it. YOU’RE WELCOME. If you’re into being tortured, L’Oréal Voluminous Smoldering Liner is going to be your weapon beauty product of choice. It’s perfect for smudgy “I woke up like this” vibes.

We all know that feeling. When it’s 8am and you’re already late and probs gonna have to take the late train with every other psychopath commuter living in New York City and you realize it’s the end of the line for, like, every beauty product you own so you have to pull an Alicia Keys and tell everyone at work that your no makeup look is a political statement and not an act of karma for sleeping with that fuckboy last weekend? Oh, that was just my morning? K. But seriously, buying beauty products is the fucking worst. It’s time-consuming, emotionally draining, and if I have to see that sales lady at Sephora give me one more smug look at the checkout counter while I mentally calculate how much money I just spent, I will lose my goddamn mind. I did not sign up for this shit.  But lucky for us that’s why drugstores were invented because someone somewhere realized that this betch literally needs someone to take her credit card away from her. Seriously. I cannot be trusted. So whether you’re a betch on a budget or just don’t want to give the check out lady at Sephora the satisfaction here are the 8 best drugstore beauty products that won’t have you breaking the bank.

1. CoverGirl Lashblast Mascara

Tyra Banks has been repping this product for the last 12 million seasons of America’s Next Top Model, which means it has the potential to make you look like a D-list model on a CW reality show, which is all I can really ask for in this life. #Blessings. Plus I trust any and all products endorsed by a woman who told me to “make hoe fashion.” 

2. Revlon Colorstay Eyeliner

If you’re anything like me, then you know you’re nothing without your eyeliner. It’s the key element to my RBF game and also in discouraging people from asking me for directions on the subway. And while I want my eyeliner to look good I also want it to be easy enough for a toddler to use because tbh my tolerance for learning new things is really fucking low. Like, right down there with my standards for men (just trying to make you proud, mom!). So thank God for Revlon because this eyeliner is perfect for lazy betches like myself. Not only does it look good on every eye shape but it’s also long-lasting.  

3. L’Oreal Paris Infallible Eye Shadow in Amber Rush

If you’re one of those who wakes up every morning and whispers to your reflection “WTF am I doing with eye makeup RN” then this eye shadow is about to become a staple in your morning makeup routine. It’s a soft, blendable eye shadow that leaves a major impact with minimal effort. Plus this rose gold shade is V popular right now and looks high-end AF even though it’s barely $10. And they say you can’t have it all.

4. NYX Cosmetics Soft Matte Lip Cream in Copenhagen

Supposedly it’s spring and my mother people are trying to tell me that it’s time to retire my dark vampy lip color in favor of lighter, more neutral shades; to which I’d just like to say:

As if this much pretty is designated to one fucking season. BYE. And there’s no lipstick I love more than Nyx Soft Matte Lip Cream. First of all, it costs less than a shot of (bottom shelf) vodka so you know that’s a fucking steal. And second of all, this shit could outlast an apocalypse. Seriously. It could outlast me getting drunk on my couch after work watching morons make love connections fuck up on Are You The One: Second Chances or me tossing back vodka sodas like my life depends on it at the free corporate happy hour. So blessed. So moved. So grateful. Can’t believe this is my life.

5. Jordana Glow N’ Go

Finding the perfect highlighter is like trying to find a boyfriend on a dating app, which is to say, good fucking luck. But unlike on a first date when someone thinks that asking you to “split the bill” will actually get them laid (see, girls? Prince Charming really is only one swipe away!), being cheap when buying a highlighter can actually pay off. At under $5, Jordana Glow N’ Go is creamy, long-lasting, and subtle enough to make people think maybe you’re born with it.

6. Neutrogena Hydro Boost Hydrating Concealer

Normally, I’m not crazy about concealer sticks but this is the creamiest, most-natural looking concealer I’ve used. It may or may not also be the only reason why people at work think I “stay home” and “act responsible” after 5pm because this shit is key to hiding hangovers from the attendance Nazis in HR. It’s the hydrating core that erases those four vodka sodas from the night before because no one, especially not that snitch Sharon, needs to know your fucking business.

7. L’Oreal Paris Hair Expert Extraordinary Clay Dry Shampoo

I’ve said it before, but dry shampoo save lives and L’Oreal Paris’ new clay dry shampoo is next fucking level. It uses clay to help absorb excess oil and is the reason I get up in the morning. Literally. It helps me to know that I can put off showering another day for a few extra minutes of sleep. It’s really the little things.

8. Essie Gel Couture Top Coat

Ugh. As if I needed one more reason to give Essie all my money, they just released a gel couture top coat and I am all about it. It gives your nails some extra shine while also extending the life of your at-home (probably shitty) manicure. But like, if you’re actually good at nails then this product is about to save you tons of money and from any awkward AF small talk with your nail technician. 

Read: The 5 Best Long-Lasting Lipsticks