If you’ve listened to Dirty John or Dr. Death, then you have an idea of what Wondery’s podcasts offer. They’re grisly, salacious looks into crimes you never knew existed, and honestly my morning commute has never been better. This week, Wondery dropped their newest podcast: Over My Dead Body. It tells the story of Dan and Wendi, “two good-looking attorneys” with “a bad breakup, a worse divorce, and a murder case involving a menagerie of high-priced lawyers and unexpected co-conspirators.” So basically, the details of how a power couple fell apart, plus a murder twist. That’s literally all of my favorite things.
So, what’s the crime being investigated here? If you’re the kind of person who hates having an appropriate amount of context spoilers, then I’d recommend you stop reading here.
— Jamie- Uglee Truth Podcast (@theugleetruth) February 14, 2019
Still with me? Good. In 2014, Dan Markel (the husband) was found dead in his Tallahassee home: shot in the head. According to Refinery29, Wendi Adelson’s (the wife’s) family was “immediately suspected of hiring someone to complete the crime.” To be fair, if I had a bad divorce from someone I would want my family to at least OFFER to send a hitman. (JK! My family’s not rich enough to pull that off.) The podcast starts with the story of Dan and Wendy’s relationship (and subsequent divorce), then goes into the details of Dan’s death and the investigation that followed.
Given how the trial in this case concludes, the story becomes less about their relationship, and more about the dynamics of race and privilege involved in the trial. Despite the Adelson family being immediate suspects, and further connections being found between the family and the suspected hitman, no family members were ultimately charged with any crimes. Instead, only people of color were arrested in connection to the crime. Given that the Adelsons are a wealthy, white family, Over My Dead Body explores how the family’s privilege may have played a role in who was ultimately charged for this crime. I mean, yeah, if it’s between wealthy Floridians staging a hit on their ex-son-in-law and a random break-in, I am 100% going with the former. People from Florida are, as a rule, insane. In-laws are also generally insane. It just adds up.
I listened to the first episode this morning, and what struck me most (other than how f*cking addictive it was) was how easy it was to forget that the story led up to a murder. Episode one starts with Dan’s upbringing, then how he met Wendi, and what their wedding was like. They also interview friends who knew them as a couple. It tells you, from Dan’s perspective, about the divorce. And as much as I love hearing the gory details of a murder, I have to say I find autopsies of relationships equally interesting—and this one sounds like a real mess. Also, and this may just be because I’m a messy b*tch, I live for seeing any two people who are described as “the perfect couple” be torn down. Especially when they try really hard to convince people they are, in fact, a perfect couple.
If you binge the first few episodes of ‘Over My Dead Body’ (can’t blame you) and are hungry for more true crime content, here’s a list of other relationships with famously violent ends. Enjoy.
I mentioned ‘Dirty John’ earlier, but if you’re not lucky enough to have listened yet, then here’s what you’re missing. ‘Dirty John’ is the story of Debra Newell, a wealthy, middle-aged interior designer, and John Meehan, the criminal and con man who seduces her. In classic Wondery fashion, the story starts with the dynamics of the relationship: the intense emotions, the broken trust, what it looked like from the outside. But as tensions build, the focus shifts from how to spot and catch a con man—and more to how you survive him. (If you’re more of a visual learner, there’s now a Bravo series on this too.)
Lorena Bobbitt famously became known as the woman who cut off her husband’s penis. While this crime was thrown around as a zany joke for most of the ‘90s, details of the crime—and the relationship leading up to it—are far from funny. I’ll let you discover the rest on your own (preferably by watching Jordan Peele’s new Amazon series about it), but suffice it to say that women don’t typically go around cutting off genitalia without due cause.
On May 8, 2013, Jodi Arias was convicted of first-degree murder for the death of ex-boyfriend Travis Alexander. Alexander and Arias met in 2006, and began a long-distance relationship in 2007. Over their 18-month, off-and-on relationship, Arias moved twice to be closer to Alexander. Meanwhile, Alexander’s friends consistently disliked Arias and felt her behavior was “worrying.” Naturally, when these same friends found Alexander covered in stab wounds with a gunshot to the head, they pointed the police in Arias’ direction. Arias pled “not guilty” to initial charges, but claimed she committed the murder was self-defense two years later, and alleged that she was a victim of domestic violence. While the Jodi Arias story doesn’t have a TV show (so sad), there is a Lifetime movie that I am very excited to watch.
Basically, if you like hearing people talk sh*t about other peoples’ relationships along with your regular dose of true crime, any one of these stories will be right up your alley. Do yourself a favor and start Over My Dead Body today, then drop your number in the comments so I can text you all my insane theories as I come up with them. Thanks!
The February slump is upon us, which means we have nothing better to do then succumb to Netflix’s latest additions: murder, musicals, and virgins. I’m not sure why February took such a dark turn Netflix-wise, but I mean maybe that’s just reflexive of the state of our world, you feel me? Anyways, without further ado, here are this month’s latest and greatest additions to Netflix.
In one of Netflix’s latest TV endeavors, Natasha Lyonne plays a woman named Nadia who legit can’t stop dying. On the evening that she’s made to be the guest of honor at a party in New York City, she dies – and then wakes up again. She does this a few times on repeat before wondering what the f*ck is going on. The comedy series co-created by Lyonne herself and Amy Poehler is sure to have you laughing for all the wrong reasons. So what, you’re a terrible person? We all are these days.
So apparently men who stalk and murder women are in this season! Originally a podcast (where all great true crime stories start), this real-life story follows Debra Newell, an interior designer looking for a man after four (yes four) failed marriages. She finds John Meehan, an anaesthesiologist with an overly promising online dating profile. He turns out to like, a sociopath. What exactly he does, though, you’ll have to watch and find out. But I’m just saying, this sh*t better be worth Connie Britton killing herself off Nashville and simultaneously ruining the entire concept of the show.
The year is 2093 and Kompass Kardashian rules planet Earth. Not actually, but like would you be surprised? A bunch of nerds board a ship called, you guessed it, the Nightflyer to go try and talk to aliens. How arrogant of them to think aliens want to hear from us. Well, they find out pretty f*cking quickly that they don’t. This is basically that episode of Black Mirror when they’re in the spaceship video game, but instead of them living happily ever after fighting off aliens, they all get brutally murdered.
ReMastered: The Two Killings of Sam Cooke
Clearly Netflix is picking up on the fact that we’re all grossly obsessed with true crime stories (hey did you know we have a true crime podcast? Cause like, you should). Sam Cooke was a soul singer who also had immense socio-political power during the Civil Rights movement. A woman named Bertha Franklin murdered him in a motel, but to this day, the story doesn’t seem to add up. His family and fans have pushed to investigate whether or not his murder was in fact politically motivated due to his rise in influence. Get ready to fall down the rabbit hole with this one. Start your engines, and may the best theory win!
Adapted from a comic book series, this Netflix Original takes the idea of superhero family just about as far from The Incredibles as humanly possible. 43 women give birth having not been pregnant like, the minute before (can you spell nightmare?). Only six of them survive and end up becoming the children of a sketchy old man who trained them to unlock their given superpowers. The show takes place 17 years after the adoption, when the man is murdered. The Umbrella Academy siblings must then reform to save the world. And you thought your family was f*cked up.
If watching Zac Efron take Troy Bolton to ’60s Baltimore isn’t reason enough to watch this iconic film, I will give you a second: Nikki Blonsky. Her fans (often referred to as “Blonskinators” or collectively as “Blonskyland”) worship the should-have-been it girl of 2007 on Twitter and Instagram. This bitch will never let you f*cking forget that she was Tracy Turnblad in Hairspray with Amanda Bynes and Queen Latifah. I can’t decide what’s better: her singing “Good Morning Baltimore” in her half-lit bedroom on Instagram live, or that legitimately not one of her co-stars follow her back, but she’ll still post congratulatory posts for Amanda Bynes getting her sh*t back together. Oh, and the music is really good.
How could you not love a movie that promotes healthy masculinity, shows a lead male pursuing a non-stereotypical career, and supports the LGBTQ community? *Steps off soapbox* Billy Elliot is a pre-teen going through the dilemma of being an un-athletic boy. After getting the sh*t beat out of him in a boxing ring, he stumbles upon a ballet class and finds himself really enjoying the opportunity to dance. The film follows Billy as he tries to convince legit everyone that boys can dance too (even though people are super ignorant and homophobic towards him – please tell me what’s changed). I won’t spoil it for you, but what I will say is that after watching this movie you’re going to be dying to see the musical adaptation.
The 40-Year-Old Virgin
Also known as Colton Underwood. Although slightly depressing in concept, this Steve Carell movie actually reminds you that he’s someone who does comedy – cause like, have you seen his latest sh*t? It’s dark. AF. Anyways, in this movie, Carell plays a lonely electronics salesman named Andy. Andy really loves action figures and video games, but his friends just want him to get f*cking laid already (side note: WHERE WERE THESE FRIENDS AT 30??). They eventually find him Trish, and the rest is history.
A large percentage of the male population would consider watching American Pie their sexual awakening. So that’s the type of movie you’re getting here. My ex-boyfriend used to actually quiz me on the order of every American Pie sequel and saga (hence, ex). In a quest to all lose their virginities (do we have a theme here this month?), five friends attempt to court girls grossly out of their league. This movie involves a lot of nudity, so not really one to watch on an airplane or at your Grandma’s house. Also, this was released in 1999 and the biggest ~scandal~ in it is a webcam link going on an all-school email. Twenty years later and we have to deal with revenge porn all over the internet. God I hate 2019.
I don’t know whom the f*ck was on crack when they thought of this movie title, but like that’s the least of our worries here. To explain the inexplicable, a woman named Josephine finds an old man dead in her apartment complex and therefore decides to go through his stuff (logic is so far out the window). She finds his artwork and decides to show it to her artsy friends Morf and Rhodora to get their opinions. The two fall in love with the work and see its market value, obvs deciding they want to make big bucks off this dead guy. Pretty soon though, sh*t hits the fan when the artwork starts to murder people. Yea, you read that right. Although it’s listed as a supernatural horror film, this movie also has a strange comedic commentary on the absurdity of the art world and money attached to it. How fun?
Images: Shutterstock, Giphy (6)
If you didn’t listen to the Dirty John podcast already, you are majorly missing out. It’s a reenactment from a very true and horrific dating story that happened in Newport Beach, CA. The story is a swift kick in the face to everyone who online dates, as you just never know what kind of psychos you’re going to meet. Also, I’m actually originally from Newport, and it is a super boring, super safe area. The fact that this happened there means no one is truly safe.
Anyway, the Dirty John podcast was so good that Bravo has picked it up for a limited series TV show that premieres on November 25th. Dirty John is about this sad, handwritten book middle-aged woman who meets her ~*~dream man~*~, and because men are trash, he’s not as he seems. Her daughters try to rally to destroy her relationship, but like, with good reason. I’m trying super hard not to give anything away. If you haven’t listened to the podcast already, just wait it out. The true story is so terrifying that I highly doubt they even needed to embellish anything in the show.
Plus it stars Connie Britton, Eric Bana, and a bunch of other people that I should probably know because they’re super famous but I don’t, so sorry. The point is, the acting will be amazing and probably more nightmare-inducing than just hearing the voices on the podcast. Also, as much as the trailer gives away, the ending is completely unexpected.
Sidenote: LOVE how they cast Tara’s sexy baby voice perfectly.
Watch the trailer now, and be prepared to shut down Hinge for a couple months after this show due to PTSD.