7 Things You Need To Stop Doing If You Have Curly Hair

Those of us who have been blessed with curly hair know how much of a rollercoaster ride our relationship with our curls can be. One day you love your hair and fully embrace your curls, and the next, they cause you to have a mental breakdown and you consider going full 2007 Britney. No shame, because we’ve all been there.

You’ve probably spent a ton of time, effort, and, above all, money trying to figure out the precise number and order of products that will get your hair to look perfect every time (even though we all know that’s pretty much impossible, because your hair basically has a mind of its own). While the actual routine will vary from person to person, there are some things that we should all steer clear of. So, here are some curly hair don’ts from the experts. 

1. Don’t Complicate Your Routine 

 

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Accurate. 😂 #curlyhair #curlygirl #curlygirlmethod #curlyhairmemes #curlyhairstyles #curlyhairroutine #curlyhairdontcare #curly

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Jessica Fitzpatrick, texture specialist at Beyond Texture Salon in Brooklyn, New York, wishes you would stop overcomplicating sh*t, and by sh*t, I mean your hair care routine. “I’m finding my clients are striving for this perfection in their routine when they are lacking consistency,” she says. Fitzpatrick says, “We tend to overcomplicate our product choices with all the YouTube tutorials and curl type hype when we haven’t established a status quo first.” Simple and consistent is the key here. I know it’s hard, but give your products some time to work before you abandon them and start anew with the next big thing on Instagram. According to Curls Understood, you may not see immediate results when using a product, and it’s best to give it about three months. If you aren’t in love with it by then, say thank you, next, and try something new.

2. Don’t Use Product With Toxic Ingredients  

 

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😂 Yup! #curlymemes #curlygirlmethod #curlhairproblems #curlygirl

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We’ve all had to kick toxic people out of our lives, so consider throwing away hair products that contain toxic and harmful ingredients in them. Curl specialist Candace Witherspoon suggests that any product that has sulfates, parabens, silicones, propylene glycol, ethanol alcohol, and added fragrances need to go. Sticking to more natural and clean hair products is the best way to keep your hair healthy. 

Dhiran Mistry, stylist at David Mallett Salon in New York City, agrees with Witherspoon and suggests you keep away from products with those ingredients in them. He says that silicones will repel moisture from your hair, sulfates will pull out your hair’s natural oil, and alcohol will cause excess drying. AKA, all things that will make your curls look and feel unhealthy. 

3. Don’t Use Chemical Processes 

A step in accepting your curls and finding other ways to manage them is to throw away any chemical processes you’ve ever used (keratin treatments, relaxers, etc.). According to Fitzpatrick, chemical processes lead to two terrible events: hair loss and thinning. “Chemical relaxers cause hair loss from the mid-shaft (breakage) and hair loss from the root (thinning),” she tells us, adding that these treatments can also lead to the recession of the hair line. Yes, receding hairlines aren’t just for creepy men on dating apps. Stay away!

4. Don’t Forget To Moisturize

As we approach the cooler months, Fitzpatrick wants you to be sure you’re assessing your moisture needs often, saying, “We tend to be in drier environments during this time of year.” She suggests using a deep conditioner more often and opting towards more cream-based stylers. She also suggests sleeping next to a humidifier, which will help provide extra moisture in your environment. And while we all love our oils and butter products, avoid using them. She tells us that, while they make your hair feel wonderful, they don’t improve the condition of the curls. They create the illusion of healthy hair and moisture, while in reality, they just sit on your curls and provide zero benefit.

5. Don’t Skip Out On Haircuts

I get it—no one likes getting a haircut. You go to get a *trim* and end up leaving with a curly bob. Like, have you ever cried after a haircut, or are you lying? Fitzpatrick suggests that in order to avoid this nightmare, it’s important to find a stylist that you communicate well with. No more sitting there scared sh*tless to speak up when everything is going wrong. She says, “Treat your first appointment with your stylist kind of as a first date.” Don’t hold back; tell them your deal breakers and expectations in this new relationship.

The list of benefits of getting your curls trimmed is long, but some continuously put off getting it done. Pandemic concerns aside, Fitzpatrick wants you to know that getting a trim will help encourage growth and longevity. Knowing this and being patient when it comes to seeing results will prevent future avoidance of getting a haircut in the future. 

6. Don’t Sleep On A Cotton Pillow 

pillow

Your life will change after sleeping on a silk or satin pillow. Not only will it help protect your curls while you toss and turn, it’ll change the appearance of your hair in the morning. No more unwanted frizz and untamable hair—it’s truly a miracle. Naturally Curly says that the friction between your hair and your normal cotton pillow case can leave your hair dry and brittle. Sleeping on a silk or satin pillow, though, will add an extra smooth layer that will allow your hair to maintain its moisture. 

7. Don’t Use Heat

IDK who needs to hear this, but heat is damaging to your hair. Having straight hair once in a while can provide a break from taming our curls daily, but doing it frequently is literally killing your curls. Using heat constantly will take away your hair’s natural shape and bounce. “Daily use of any hot iron on curly hair will eventually damage curly hair. Steer clear of them!” Mistry tells us. 

Yes, I’m talking to you, the one who never gives their hair a break. Every once in a while is fine, but this isn’t middle school anymore and you shouldn’t be flat-ironing your hair within an inch of its life every single day. Give those curls a break.

Images: Radu Florin / Unsplash; @curlyhair_memes (2) / Instagram

3 Black Female CEOs On Why We Need More Black Women In The Beauty Space

Before the social justice uprising that has taken place this year, could you name three Black-owned beauty brands off the top of your head? With little accessibility to brands that represent a range of darker skin tones and different hair textures, Black people are often left with limited options to achieve their desired looks. If we have learned anything this year, it is that representation matters. It should go without saying that Black consumers deserve to be acknowledged in the beauty industry. In honor of National Black Business month, we’re turning our attention to three Black women CEOs who have taken the step to catering to Black women’s needs and are making space for more melanin in the beauty industry.

Wilma Mae of DRK Beauty

 

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Perfectionism is exhausting! It can manifest itself in the way you view yourself, your work, or your ability to achieve your goals. There is far more joy found in embracing what you have and going for it anyway. Tap the link in bio to read @cherylchiew’s latest piece on unlearning perfectionism and how it taught her to see herself as good enough. We hope you are inspired to do the same. What are you letting go off as we move into a new month? Let us know below! #ThisIsDRKBeauty ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ #Photo @laurenloncar ⠀⠀⠀ #Model @faithjaggernauth ⠀ #Makeup @deannamelluso ⠀⠀⠀ #Hair @mark.alan.hair ⠀⠀⠀⠀ #Stylist @tarzinichols⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ #flawsandall #acceptance #innerbeauty #truebeauty #positivity #affirmations #perfectionism #strongwomen

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“DRK Beauty is a digital community that supports and empowers women of color in all their diversity. Through curated content, programming, and community initiatives, DRK Beauty aims to truly empower those who identify as women of color and fix the flawed relationships between brands and women of color.

DRK Beauty Healing is one of our first community initiatives in response to COVID-19 and the BLM movement. When we first launched DRK Beauty Healing on May 15th of this year—before George Floyd’s murder—we had only conceived the idea two weeks earlier as a response to the impending mental health fallout from COVID-19. Having never worked in the therapeutic space, our first step was to speak to therapists. We had back-to-back Zoom calls five days a week for the first month. We also spoke to mental health associations such as Mental Health America to learn more about the space and researched other initiatives in our community. We effectively educated ourselves as quickly as we could.

What we discovered is that there are precious few clinicians of color in the U.S. (Black/African psychologists make up only 5% of the total in the U.S.) and the free initiatives that are out there required prospective clients to fill out online forms and share their data and then wait to be approved to receive the free therapy. This added yet another barrier to entry, not to speak of the cultural stigma of therapy in the Black community. In addition, when you are depressed, traumatized, and/or paralyzed with anxiety, you don’t have the mental bandwidth to fill out forms and wait for an answer. You need the help now! We felt that the need was urgent and we wanted to make the process as seamless as possible. Also, we wanted to make sure that we didn’t breach any privacy rules. So my developers built an online directory and within two weeks we launched with a few hundred hours of therapy donated by clinicians we had spoken to. We asked them to share with their clinicians as well. So they continued to donate hours and within a month of launch, we had 1,000 hours of free therapy to give away. We’ve now raised over 2,000 hours of free therapy and we are now one of the leading platforms for free therapy for women of color in America, covering 27 states with approximately 100 clinicians.”

Brittney Ogike of BeautyBeez

 

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@vickyunfiltered did not come to play with us!😍 She is rocking @sensationnel_hair Rule Breaker Lace Wig sold both in-store @beautybeezstore and online BEAUTYBEEZ.com 🥰 • • • • • • • • • #melaninmagic #kinkycurlyhair #4ahair #sensationnelhair #melaninpoppin #4chair #teamsensationnel #naturalhair #sensationnel #protectivestyles #bsshair #3chair #lacefrontwig #blackgirlmagic #naturalhairjourney #naturalhairdaily #naturalhaircommunity #rulebreaker #bighair #kinkycurly #blackhair #curlyhair #naturalista #melanin

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“BEAUTYBEEZ was created to fill a gap in the retail industry. What many people outside of the African-American community do not realize is that ethnic hair care and beauty products are traditionally sold in small local retailers called beauty supply stores. Every Black woman has memories—both fond and unpleasant—of going to the local beauty supply store with our mothers and shopping for those nostalgic “Black girl hair” products. It was a space specifically for us! The larger retailers didn’t (and still don’t) carry these items. Due to various laws and regulations over the past several decades, ownership in ethnic beauty largely transferred to the Korean-American community. Traditionally, they own the stores, the products, the hair manufacturing, and the distribution. And, unfortunately, people of color are oftentimes discriminated against in all areas—most notably in the beauty supply stores. We are followed, harassed, and left to fend for ourselves.

BEAUTYBEEZ is a modern beauty retailer prioritizing beauty for women of color. I founded the brand after my own dissatisfaction shopping for beauty. As an entrepreneur creating success in a field where I’m the minority, I’ve had to be resilient, resourceful, and stand out. There were several challenges that came my way, and I faced them head on. I took the time to equip myself with the knowledge and skills necessary to thrive in an industry that capitalizes off of me. I used my experience as a consumer and infused it in all aspects of BEAUTYBEEZ—from the products and services we offer to the customer experience. My identity and experiences as a Black consumer have single-handedly been the most effective attribute I’ve brought to the business and enabled me to thrive in an industry that is dominated by people who do not look like me. 

BEAUTYBEEZ provides an inclusive beauty experience where women of color can shop, explore, and play in a world full of beauty. The brand was created because nothing like it exists and we wanted to be a complete departure from the typical beauty supply. Our mission is to celebrate Black beauty in every way possible—a curated collection of hair care, skin care, and beauty products; selling inclusive beauty brands; promoting minority owned brands; hiring diversity in our team members; tailored services for our unique needs; and most importantly, the creation of a community reflective of our brand’s values and ideals. We’ve been able to successfully create this space because we possess a passion for and knowledge of our consumers and their needs—an approach many of our predecessors have neglected.”

Jamila Powell, Owner & Founder, Maggie Rose Salon

 

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It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood!

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When I first entered the beauty industry, I didn’t really have a clear understanding of all of the nuances and disparity that existed. I am a salon owner and do not do hair. I was primarily interested in the salon being a second stream of income. I started the salon geared towards extension work, and then transitioned into curly textured hair. As the business grew, so did my desire to become more known in the industry and be recognized as a salon of curl experts. That is when I discovered that salons and stylists of color are put in a box and not given the opportunity to shine on an international platform. Even more surprising, most salons that are recognized for specializing in curls are not Black-owned.

I initially tried to reach out to many of the well-known industry publications, but the feedback was pretty much non-existent. Typically, a handful of stylists of color are chosen to be representatives in the hair world, but new talent is not sought-after. I decided with the access we have to the internet and social media, I would create a lane for myself. I have created a global following for Maggie Rose, along with an educational platform called Texture University, and am in the process of launching a hair system for curls called Naturally Drenched. It has been a journey, but I have realized it is better to create your own platform versus depending on others.”

Images: Cottonbro / Pexels; thisisdrkbeauty, beautybeezstore, maggierosesalon / Instagram

The Best Black Friday And Cyber Monday Deals On Beauty

Like many millennials with jobs, my beauty look is pretty consistent day-to-day, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have 82 tinted moisturizers, 41 mascaras, and about a million different facial mists. I like to mix it up, what can I say? If you, too, are an out-and-proud beauty junkie, welcome. It is my personal belief that the best time to buy beauty products is around Thanksgiving, because not only is everything cheap af, but everything is sold in sets. Yes. Please. Give me a million eyeshadows that have just slightly different undertones. Honestly, I love this holiday so much because we spend the whole day being grateful for all of the sh*t we have, but only until midnight when we’ll fight each other to the f*cking death at Target to get that 30% off KitchenAid mixer. #America, right? So if you fully embrace this holiday as a day of gluttony, scoop up these beauty deals before your friends do. 

Ulta

Obviously, I have to start with the DSW of beauty because it just has so much stuff to basically give away this holiday season. Because they have about a thousand different sales going on during Thanksgiving weekend, I’m just going to name the few brands I’d personally recommend. Let’s start with 25% off Macadamia Professional hair masques. If you’ve ever been in a drugstore, you’ve seen this brand’s hair products. I have been using the Deep Repair Masque since high school, and it’s never disappointed me. It’s meant for people with damaged hair, but as a bitch with proudly virgin hair (hold applause), I love it because it takes my hair to the next level in softness. If you think delayed gratification is stupid, you’ll love this masque because you’ll feel its effects immediately. 

Macadamia Professional Nourishing Repair Masque

Next is the BECCA Volcano Goddess Eyeshadow Palette, which is 40% off, aka it’s $27, aka it’s free. Honestly, I don’t really wear eyeshadow because I don’t know how to put it on without looking like a toddler in drag, but the colors in this palette are pretty wearable. So if you stan an eyeshadow moment, this palette is for you. 

BECCA Volcano Goddess Eyeshadow Palette

And lastly, Ulta is offering 25% off a Chi 1-inch Ceramic Hairstyling Iron. I don’t have the time or the skills to give myself Serena-van-der-Woodsen-circa-season-one waves, so I don’t even try. However, every now and then after sleeping on wet hair for no reason at all, I wake up with a really unfortunate situation on my head, and this little hero can fix it within 10 minutes. I don’t usually curl my whole head, but a few chunks of hair throughout gives me that tousled look that I’m really feeling these days. I know what you’re thinking: wtf are you talking about, this is a hair straightener? To you, I say the most natural-looking waves come from flat irons! Twist your hair around the iron and gently pull the iron down the twist. I’m telling you, it’s never failed me. 

Chi 1 inch straightener

Chi Original 1” Ceramic Hairstyling Iron

Glow Recipe

Not going to lie, I discovered Glow Recipe at Urban Outfitters, and have been obsessed ever since. The relatively new brand is offering 20% off every single product on their website, so if you haven’t already added a slew of skin care to your cart, you’re behind, girl. Anyway, if you are the kind of person who can be seduced into buying something simply because the packaging is irresistible, get ready to purchase literally every damn Glow Recipe product. I have the Watermelon Glow Sleeping Mask and am truly obsessed—mostly because it serves as a skin savior and decor on my dresser. Cute appearance aside, the mask itself is actually really good. It’s really moisturizing, but has a gel-like quality to it, so it doesn’t leave you feeling greasy and oily when you wake up. That ain’t cute. 

Glow Recipe Watermelon Glow Sleeping Mask

Tatcha

This Japanese skin care brand is in pretty much every natural or ethical beauty store in the world and from November 28 through December, you can “play for a chance to get either 20% off your $100 purchase, 15% off your $75 purchase, or two free gifts with orders of $50 or more.” All of their products are cute and purple, but one of their products is truly better than the rest. I’m talking about the Luminous Dewy Skin Mist. Before you judge me for spending more than I’d like to admit on what you’d call water, hear me out. It’s made with botanical oils and humectants, which are responsible for the dew, and tbh it smells so damn good that I literally smile when I spray it, and I don’t even smile at puppies walking by.

Tatcha Luminous Dewy Skin Mist

Also, I recently learned that your moisturizer absorbs way better when your skin is moist (get over it) than when it’s bone dry. Think about it this way: your skin is like a sponge, and sponges don’t work until they’re damp, right? Another cult favorite from this brand is the Dewy Skin Cream, which I haven’t had the pleasure of trying because I am low on funds, but maybe I’ll hit the jackpot on their annoying Thanksgiving game and be able to afford it! 

Kevyn Aucoin

Get ready for the most niche Black Friday sale literally ever: Get 25% off your order and receive a free Exotique Diamond Eye Gloss in “Galaxy” when you spend $75 on November 29. Like, really? Only on November 29? Honestly, I’m sure I’ll get an email on November 30 that says, “We’re so nice and extending our sale!” The only reason I’m down for this annoyingly specific sale is because I’m so in love with my Neo Blush and feel like she needs friends. I’ve been dying to try the Sensual Skin Enhancer Concealer because it’s a really thick cream (as opposed to a solid, like most concealers are) and comes in a cute little pot. Also, I feel like if I have this, I could just dab it where I need it (because it’s thicc af and does its job) and not have to wear foundation or tinted moisturizer. 

Kevyn Aucoin Neo Blush

Stila

Stila is offering 35% off site-wide plus free shipping on all orders of $50 or more from November 29 through December 1 with the promo code BF35. I own one product from Stila that has truly defined my going out look to a T, and it is the Stay All Day Waterproof Liquid Eye Liner. Executing the perfect cat eye is hard, but Stila’s liner is actually really easy to use because it’s just a long tapered pen. So all you have to do is angle it as you draw, so the line gets thinner, and that’s pretty much it. Easy peazy. Anyway, Stila also has a pretty legit price point for a mid-level brand, so I fully support this sale. Another product I had and loved until I broke it by accident was the Aqua Glow Serum Foundation, because it was pretty full coverage but had the consistency of water, so it didn’t feel heavy or caked. 

Stila Stay All Day Waterproof Liquid Eyeliner

Drybar

I am more in love with my six-year-old Buttercup hair dryer than I am with the guy I’m seeing. Seriously. I have a lot of thick hair, so making sure it dries without going rogue is very important to me, and that’s why I have the Drybar one, the famous Josh Harry one, and, don’t judge me, the Dyson Supersonic. Drybar is shining down on thee and giving you 20% off all products, tools, and kits from November 21 through December 1. The Buttercup was the cheapest and oldest of the three I have, but it’s my OG and I use it every damn day. It weighs like, a pound, is pretty quiet, and does an excellent job. Generally, expensive hair dryers are better than drugstore ones because they use more power than they do heat, so they are less damaging to your hair. Cheaper hairdryers work in the opposite way, using more heat than watts, so you’re essentially frying your hair for longer. I also have the Drybar heat protectant, which smells so good that I leave it on my hands for as long as I can before the New York City subway system forces me to wash them. Luckily, the smell lingers in my hair for the entire day. By the way, Harry Josh is also having a Dermstore sale for 30% all of his products with the promo code DSGIFT from November 28 through December 2. His hair dryer is def cuter than the Buttercup, so if that matters to you, you can get it for a little less this holiday season!

Drybar Buttercup Blow-Dryer

L’Occitane

L’Occitane (pronounced “lox- ee- tahn”—you’re welcome) is giving us 20% off all full-size items with promo code CYBER from December 1 through 4, because they know no one is dragging their hungover asses to a store to buy their favorite hand cream. Speaking of which, I didn’t realize this brand sold anything besides hand cream until my grandmother gave me a beautifully packaged perfume (technically an eau de toilette) that smells so good that I spray it on my pillow before I go to sleep. It’s the Verbena scent, which is generally pretty clean with a hint of green tea. No complaints. 

L’Occitane Verbena Eau de Toilette

Images: Ulta; Glow Recipe; Tatcha; Kevyn Acoin; Stila; Drybar’ L’Occitane; Eco Warrior Princess / Unsplash

Betches may receive a portion of revenue if you click a link and purchase a product or service. The links are independently placed and do not influence editorial content.

How To Get Frizz-Free Curls This Summer Even When It’s 100% Humidity

People with straight hair think they have it rough this time of year and I’m not sorry, but curly hair is really the worst of all time in the summer. On a good day (which I can’t even remember when that was), big bouncy curls are what make me feel like a talentless celeb, whether it’s because I dared to let my natural hair show or I worked my magic with a curling wand. However, when bittersweet August rolls around, my so-called curls literally spiral out of control—sort of like, IDK, my fucking life? They frizz before I can even leave my bathroom and if I don’t have time to straighten my hair when I’m already “late” for meeting my friends out, I look like Mia Thermopolis before the glow-up. Yeah, it’s that bad. Since I rarely ever have time to straighten my mop and I ran out of excuses to bail on going out, here’s the solution to non-frizzy curls so you don’t have Monica hair from here on out.

You’ll thank me when this isn’t you:

Monica Hair Friends

1. Use Curl-Enhancing Shampoo And Conditioner

The dictator of how good your hair day will be starts in the shower. You want to find a curl-enhancing shampoo and conditioner duo like Briogeo Curl Charisma Rice Amino Avocado Hydrating Shampoo and Shea Curl Defining Conditioner. The formula is everything you could want for your curls and more because it not only defines your curls 10x more (duh), but it locks out frizz-causing enemies and provides tooooons of body without making your hair heavy af.

Briogeo Shampoo And Conditioner

2. Detangle And Brush Your Hair While In The Shower

Not after you get out because this is what like, separates your curls and causes them to frizz out like a Chia Pet. Find a detangling brush made for thicker, coarser hair types like Tangle Teezer Thick And Curly Detangling Brush. Its bristles keep your curls intact and prevents cuticle damage so half of your hair doesn’t fall out or nearly break the brush like this:

Curly Hair

3. Deep Condition At Least Once A Week

By the time Wednesday rolls around, you look as good as your hair: lifeless. For an extra pick-me-up and hydration bonus mid-week, try to use a leave-in conditioner such as Living Proof Curl Leave-In Conditioner that offers the best frizz control ever and keeps a hold on your voluminous curls all throughout happy hour and bar hopping.

Them: Your hair looks so good today.
Me: Ugh omg stop, my hair’s totally all over the place.
Also Me:

Beyonce Hair Flip

4. Add Oil After Drying

When you’re done drying your hair by *lightly* dabbing with a towel (not rubbing, for god’s sake) or using a blow dryer with a diffuser, seal in your hair’s natural oils by applying a light oil like Bumble And Bumble Bb. Curl (Style) Anti-Humidity Gel-Oil. This blocks out the humidity and provides a fab natural-looking shine. Plus, if you’re day drinking under the sun, UV inhibitors will prevent your curls from drying out so you won’t look electrocuted.

BB Curl Style

5. Finish With A Defining Cream

When you’re done perfecting your look, add a cream like the Drybar Velvet Hammer Hydrating Control Cream to hold your style so annoying-ass fly-aways don’t kill your vibe and get in the way of your drink and your two-step. This cream will prevent frizz all night long as you make your way through sweaty nightclubs so your hair still looks as smooth and radiant as ever. It will add an amazing gloss and intense definition for extra perky ringlets. Can I, um, put this on my chest, too? Asking for a friend.

Drybar Velvet Hammer Finishing Cream

Read: The Drug Store Shampoos That Are Secretly Ruining Your Hair
 
Perms Are Making A Comeback, And Our Mothers Could Not Be More Thrilled

You know when you’re having a really great morning, you look good and you feel good, and then you read something really fucked up like margaritas are giving you skin rashes and you lose your will to live? Well, you may want to rethink getting out of bed this morning because this just in: perms are making a comeback. Anddd the hits just keep on coming.

Apparently perms are making a comeback and this must be stopped before my mother tags me in a very smug Facebook post. This is not a drill, people. Places like InStyle magazine, Marie Claire, and Women’s Health magazine have confirmed the story, but then again they also confirm stories like “Welcome to the Dollhouse: A Conversation With A Human Barbie” so can they really be trusted? I’ll leave that up to you. BUT if my worst nightmare is coming true and the ‘80s are coming back one beauty trend at a time, then here’s what you need to know about it:

1. Carrie Bradshaw’s Hair Isn’t Making A Comeback, Thank God

You can kind of breathe easy because the type of perm that’s making a comeback is not the over-volumized, tight curls, horrifying bangs type that we know and abhor. THANK GOD. But rather, the natural bend-in-the-hair type of perm, made famous by human praying mantises Victoria’s Secret models. Tbh it kinda makes me feel a little superior that Victoria’s Secret models might be walking around with permed hair (even if they look good AF doing it). Like, you may get the great body and date famous, beautiful people and have the metabolism of an anorexic 14-year-old girl and… I’m not sure where I was going with this but suddenly I have the urge to drink my feelings.

*opens bottle of wine*

2. It’s All About The Air Dried, I-Just-Emerged-From-A-Fucking-Lagoon Look

Which is a step away from the super styled curling iron waves that we know and love. Hmm is that why barrel curls were replaced on Nick’s season of The Bachelor with I’m-too-busy-getting-wasted-by-the-pool-to-finish-my-hair-before-the-rose-ceremony curls? Were those bitches actually ahead of the style curve or were they just, like, drunk and lazy? Food for thought.

Lol nah. Any girl who wears a leopard print headband isn’t ahead of anything other than the guy she’s flipping off on the New Jersey turnpike.

Read: The Worst Fashion & Beauty Choices On The Bachelor
 

3. It All Depends On The Size Of The Rod

As is true with all things in life, how much I judge you your perm depends on the size of the rod. No, seriously. You can’t make this shit up. Using smaller rods will get you looking like a bridesmaid at your mother’s wedding somebody just put Baby in the corner, while larger rods give you that beachy wave perfection. Either way you should def consult with your hair stylist (Hi, Susi) to see how big of a rod you should use.

4. If Your Hair Color Isn’t Natural Then You’re In For A Fucking Problem

Unless you’re one of those girls who are in my burn book don’t color their hair, then you’re in for a real fucking problem. Overly highlighted hair doesn’t hold perms the same way natural hair does. This is especially true if you’re one of my sorority sisters bleaching your hair, because bleach-highlighted strands have a different consistency than the strands that aren’t highlighted, and this can seriously fuck with your curls. But because there is a God and She is obsessed with Flashdance rn, there are thio-free treatments (aka treatments that use a different chemical to break the bonds in hair) available for people who dye their hair and/or want a less damaging treatment.

Fuck, now I kind of want a perm. No one show my mother this, lest I eat shit in the family group chat. But seriously, I’m off to go reevaluate my life since apparently hell has frozen over.