How about them 2020 weddings, huh? Thanks to the Virus That Must Not Be Named, celebrations of all kinds look different this year. With state regulations and new reports coming out each day about hotspots and sick celebs, it’s clear COVID is not only here to stay, but it’s here to f*ck with your big day for a long time as well. Because for couples getting married during a global pandemic, pre-wedding stress is at an all-time high.
Not only do engaged folks have to budget for things like gloves, makes, and hand sanitizer, but chances are they’ve had to postpone their events (multiple times, in some cases) and the end results don’t look anything like the celebration we all dreamed off since watching Bride Wars when we were in middle school. There are a lot of aspects that majorly suck, but one of the biggest is the fact that some of your closest friends or family might not get to be there on the big day.
Whether they’re high risk, morally opposed to big gatherings during a pandemic, or can’t risk catching anything due to work or their general love of being alive and not ill, odds are there will be a few VIPs who have to change their RSVPs from “hell yessss” to “uh, actually. No.” As someone who’s recently faced a lot of “you’re the worst” backlash after RSVPing “no” to every wedding in 2020 (with plenty advance notice, mind you—I’m not going texting the bride the day before saying I can’t make it), here’s how to deal when your guests decide that your big day just isn’t worth it rn.
Remember: There’s A Literal Pandemic Happening
Not to state to obvious here, but like, the whole coronavirus thing is still a big deal. As bars, restaurants, and sex clubs open back up, you have to remember: It’s not because we’re any safer. It’s because places need to make money. Your friends who are diligent about avoiding crowds, keeping their distance, and staying home when possible aren’t being dramatic. They just like, you know, want to stay alive and want to keep their friends and family alive and healthy. While it might seem like a personal affront for them not to risk their safety to watch you marry some guy you drunkenly met at a college bar, it’s not. It’s a literal matter of not wanting to catch or spread a potentially deadly disease. Keep that in mind before giving them the cold shoulder after they give you the news.
Keep Your Cool
Yes, your guests choosing not to go to your wedding is upsetting. But the thing is, they’re not wrong here. Having an event—any event of any size—is a risk right now. Your guests wanting to stay home aren’t in the wrong here. While people always have the option to RSVP “no” to weddings, the whole virus excuse is a really good one—and the fact that they’re courteous enough to (hopefully) politely tell you they can’t attend without lecturing you about safety practices is a win. Remember: They could send you pages of data about why having a wedding rn is risky, so consider yourself spared.
So, instead of bitching out your friends who don’t feel comfortable attending, trying to remain calm. Tell them you’re bummed but understand (assuming you understand, of course) and take some time to mourn. It’s a really hard time to be getting married, but creating strife in your relationships won’t make things any easier. Be kind and compassionate and chances are they’ll still send you a gift.
Offer Virtual Options
I know Zoom weddings seem sooooooo summer 2020, but not only are they still a thing, but they’re a great option for guests who don’t feel comfortable celebrating in person. Make sure to set up virtual links so anyone who doesn’t feel great about being in crowds can still be a part of the big day. No, it’s not ideal, but as someone whose maid of honor couldn’t be at her wedding pre-COVID due to pregnancy complications, the event can still be just as special. Make cardboard cutouts of your non-attending VIPs. Set up multiple Skype stations that guests can access so they can see different parts of the party. FaceTime any besties who can’t make it as you’re getting ready. This way you can still feel the love, and your guests can feel included from home.
Keep Your Priorities Straight
I know I’ve said this before, but if you’ve scrolled through Instagram, chances are you’ve seen people living their lives like a virus isn’t still running rampant through America. Yes, weddings are about dresses and flowers and attention, but mostly they’re supposed to be about marrying the person you love. Well, that and getting a KitchenAid mixer, of course. The point is, it sucks that this once-in-a-lifetime event is happening during a pandemic, but you still get to get married (something generations of people in interracial or same-sex relationships didn’t have the option of doing), you still have friends (unless you’re a total monster to everyone who says they can’t attend), and you’ll still get to rock that overpriced diamond band. If you can make it out of this with your relationships intact and your romantic bond strong, you’ll be able to get through anything.
Plan An Event Post-COVID
It won’t be the same as having the giant wedding you originally planned, but let’s be real: The world is going to look different after this. No one is used to going into an office anymore and we haven’t worn real pants in forever so like, yeah. That ship has sailed. With so many couples having to downsize their weddings, vow renewals or post-wedding parties are 100% going to be a thing in a year or two (just like how babymoons became something to do). If you shun everyone who didn’t come to your covid wedding now, you won’t have nearly the guest list you’d like when there’s a vaccine and you can have another party.
The point is: Yes, this sucks, but your friends aren’t bad people for not coming to your wedding rn. Don’t be a d*ck and hopefully, we can all go back to grinding on the dance floor to “Get Low” while our grandparents watch in horror someday soon.
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Image: Analise Benevides on Unsplash; betchesbrides / Instagram
We know you probably never want to hear the words “coronavirus,” “quarantine,” and “unprecedented times” again, but unfortunately The Rona is still among us. Corona brides across the world are lost when it comes to what to do now that their wedding has been postponed or canceled. The days of saying “I do” in front of friends and family and taking shots with your bridesmaids at the open bar seem so distant, but we’re hopeful that the investment towards celebrating this new chapter in your life is worth the wait. For those of you that have officially made the decision to share your vows with your S.O. in 2021, you’re probably wondering WTF to do with all of your plans now? Don’t freak out, because we’ve gone ahead and asked the experts to share their thoughts on what couples can be doing in the meantime to ensure that all t’s are crossed and i’s are dotted before the big day.
Get Organized
Yes, you probably had everything planned out perfectly, right down to your personalized stationery before the virus happened, but now that your plans have changed, there’s some tricky re-thinking to do. “It goes without saying that trying to navigate the postponement of a wedding is mind-boggling, and it can be hard to know where to start, or better yet, figure out an organized way to keep track of your progress and your remaining to-dos,” says Lisa Bowser, Founder of Brite Lite, a company that makes LED neon signs. “Lists on lists on lists can be quite boring to look at, yes?” Um, yes! Bowser recommends the acrylic dry-erase Goals Calendar to eliminate your wedding stress. Bonus: you can still use it in your home after your wedding planning process is (finally) over.
Read Your Contracts
I know we’re all programmed to click “accept terms and conditions” without a second thought, but with circumstances constantly changing as our world adapts to the virus, it’s essential that you and your future spouse have your contingency plans up-to-date. As AJ Williams, Founder and Creative Director at Boston-based event planning company AJ Events, recommends, “When reading your contracts, make sure you have your planner and vendors develop a rescheduling contract or addendum, and to change the Force Majeure to include pandemics and decreased capacity due to government mandates.” This way, you won’t have to scramble to make things work any more than you’ve already had to.
See What Safety Precautions Your Vendors Are Taking
When you do end up walking down the aisle, you want to be sure all possible measures are put in place to ensure that your guests stay happy and healthy. AJ Williams reports that for all future events, his company “will require cleaning/sanitation measures from our vendors and venues working on our events and add sanitation efforts plus add supplies at attendee check-in to protect the safety of our work environment and your attendees while allowing us to continue to service our clients.” He adds, “We have created branded plexi walls on our bar and catering stations, adorable customized face masks with your favorite quote or funny message or emoji icon to include your signature style. Get creative while keeping safe.” So make sure you check with your vendors to see how they’re adapting to these (my brain: don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it) unprecedented times.
Enjoy Your Engagement
Though you’ve (understandably) been mentally designing your reception place cards since the moment you got a ring on your finger, take this unique opportunity to sit back, relax, and enjoy this extra time of being engaged to the love of your life. Of course, says Taylor Waxman of L.A.-based event design and production company KED & Co., “Changing your wedding date can be emotionally draining. Managing your friends and family travel plans, rescheduling your vendors to make sure everyone is available on the same day and overall reimagining a new date in a new year—you’ve been through it.”
When adjusting your wedding planning timeline, though, staying sane is essential. “Don’t over plan,” advises Waxman. “It’s very easy to focus on your wedding during this time, but our biggest advice is: don’t. Once you have your vendors and location rescheduled and all guests are alerted of the new date, take a step back to enjoy your engagement. Spend quality time with your partner, schedule outdoor picnics or Zoom dinners with family and friends, take this time to reconnect and appreciate what is around you.”
Make The Process Fun
Now that you’ve got some extra time to plan things out, you and your partner can hone in on achieving the wedding of your dreams. Sarah Kuhlberg, Creative Director at Colette’s Catering and Events, suggests that you “Cast aside what might be typical wedding traditions, and do what YOU really, truly want for your wedding. Explore bright colors, beautiful seasonal menus, wine flown in from your favorite winery, book a unique outdoor venue, mix and match your linen pattern choices, custom built backdrops from local artists, neon signage, etc. Now you have the time to really customize!”
While it’s easy to get overwhelmed with pressing health concerns on top of your color scheme choices, “Making the difficult decision to postpone your wedding should be the hardest part. Once you’ve done that, try to make the rest of the process fun,” advises Matt Ramirez, Senior VP of Marketing at Generation Tux. “Look at new wedding trends, new seasonal colors, and opportunities to update your wedding plans! Everyone in the wedding industry knows this is a tough time for couples, and we’re here to work with you. Take this time with your husband to design the look of your wedding suit or tux again, order some free swatches, and get a free home try-on delivered to the groom.”
If you want to get creative without overloading your plate, Taylor Waxman suggests designing your own thank you notes online, finding custom postage for your wedding invitations, registering for gifts, working on your wedding website, finalizing your guest list, and choosing meaningful songs to be played during your ceremony. She also suggested pulling inspiration images (as if you needed an excuse to add to the wedding Pinterest board you’ve had since college.). “Focus on your style and look, try not to go too deep in detail,” she recommends. “Keep this light and fun.”
Can’t Wait? Go For It!
As Nike says, “Just Do It.” If you and your S.O. are itching to get married ASAP, Sarah Kuhlberg suggests having a mini wedding and eloping in your backyard, and then scheduling a reception for a year later so you can celebrate your first anniversary with friends and family. Don’t be afraid to think outside of the box and feel free to “Create your dream celebration and know that this new wedding style is something we are all getting used to.”
Images: Natasha Fernandez / Pexels; Britelitetribe.com; @betchesbrides / Instagram
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First comes love, then comes coronavirus, then comes the influx of Zoom weddings in 2020. If you’re a human existing on Planet Earth rn, congrats! Life majorly sucks. Jobs, lives, and financial stability are being ripped out from underneath us, and we can’t even have nice things like happy hours or big open bar weddings to alleviate some of that sadness. As more and more couples have had to ditch their original plans and scale wayyy back on their Pinterest-inspired nuptials, technological ceremonies are officially on the rise.
While hosting a virtual affair is one thing, attending a Zoom wedding is a whole other situation. Granted, this is a very new concept so the kinks are still being sorted out, but just like with a traditional in-person ceremony, ensuring you’re not being a d*ck at a streamed wedding is just as important. “Much like an in-person wedding, look to the wedding invite for clues—even if it’s an email invite or a quick text with a Zoom link,” advises Lauren Kay, executive editor of The Knot. That will give you an insight into how to move forward without making your pals more upset than they already are.
But to break it down further, we’re covering what to wear, whether or not to send a gift, and what you should (and shouldn’t do) to be the best Zoom wedding guest possible. Because honestly, if we can’t give our friends their dream weddings, the literal least we can do is not be total pieces of sh*t at their on-screen celebrations.
Do You Give A Gift?
One of the most upsetting parts of this whole “changing your plans” thing (IMO) is the lack of gifts. I love gifts. Everyone loves gifts. So, if events are being canceled or scaled back, there’s a chance gifts are as well, and for some engaged couples, they’re really counting on that blender/bar cart/contribution to their cash fund. Basically, if they’re scaling back and only having a small ceremony/celebration, send them a gift as usual, whether or not you’re actually attending their event.
If they’re having a minimony now and a party later, consider splitting your gift amount in half and giving them something for both occasions, if you can afford it. “I’d recommend giving something now and something later,” advises Kay. Some of the best options for a gift amid the pandemic are things off of their registry that they can use, like board games or a cocktail set so they can practice their mixology skills (or drink their sorrows) at home. “A ‘now’ gift softens the blow of a postponement/virtual ceremony ever so slightly, and what better time to learn a new skill?” notes Kay.
What TF Do You Wear?
By now, most of us are so used to showing up ugly on video chats, we don’t even think twice about our appearance. Greasy hair, stained pajamas, and pimple cream dotting our faces is the new WFH uniform. While it might seem silly to dress up just to stay home and watch a glitchy ceremony on your laptop screen, the effort you put in will go a long way for the couple. “Check the couple’s wedding website to see if they mention anything about a preferred dress code,” suggests Kay. “When in doubt, air on the celebratory side. Dress as you might have for the postponed celebration—even if it’s only from the waist up.”
Dress to impress, because if all else fails, you’ll at least get to see if you still remember how to put makeup on and can pop off an Instagram where you look somewhat like the former self who used to get dressed and do fun things. If not for love, do it for the likes.
What’s The Tech Etiquette?
“You’re tuning in to celebrate the couple, so keep the focus on them,” reminds Kay. Even though you’re sitting at home and not at a fancy venue, it doesn’t mean all etiquette is out the window. Mute your mic, speak only if asked/when it’s appropriate, respect any requests to avoid photography, and choose a background that fits the theme but isn’t in-your-face. No matter how much the couple likes The Office, this isn’t the time to whip out a picture of Michael Scott. “Find a simple background (think: no distractions) with good lighting so your excitement can be seen by the newlyweds,” suggests Kay.
What Else Do I Need To Know?
“Virtual weddings are still fairly new, so there aren’t any hard and fast rules. That being said, be a good guest—much like you’d be in person,” says Kay. Which is pretty self-explanatory, but just in case you think virtual weddings are an excuse to be an asshole, here’s your official notice: they’re not. “Log on at the designated time and follow any requests of the couple (think: attire, “bring something to toast with us,” etc.). Be attentive and respectful, making your congratulations known to the couple at the appropriate time,” she advises.
While it might seem like this new take on weddings means you get to be less present (or give fewer presents), give your friends the same courtesy they gave you when they shelled out thousands just to hook up with some drunk groomsmen when it was your turn.
Once upon a time, the most challenging decisions a bride had to make were who would be a bridesmaid, who would walk her down the aisle, and how to get out of inviting her annoying college roommate who always dresses way too provocatively at events. Granted, none of that was easy and even back in the pre-coronavirus days, the wedding stress was out of control. Now, however, brides are faced with new hurdles after already going through the previous ones, the biggest of which is whether or not to have a virtual wedding, and how to go about doing it.
Since no one can go anywhere or be near each other, those 100+ people weddings are obviously out, but a virtual wedding isn’t necessarily cut and dry either. For a legal marriage, you need the essentials (license, officiant, exchange of promises, signatures, and sometimes witnesses). If you’re considering tying the knot on-screen, however, you might be confused about how to go about making that happen.
Since more and more couples are opting for virtual nuptials, we’re breaking down the hows, the whys, and the whats you need to have a legal and memorial Zoom wedding. “Everyone deserves to be excited and celebrate this most important milestone,” says Caroline Colavita, the director of e-commerce for Adrianna Papell. “You’ll want to feel like The Bride, not just another Zoom happy hour attendee.” From the legalities to the psychology behind ceremonies, here’s how to make your Zoom wedding feel just as, if not even more special than the in-person one you originally planned.
What/Who Do You Need
Wedding 101: Every state is different surrounding the rules and regulations of marriage. As any bride will tell you, part of the process is digging deep and figuring out what, exactly, you need to be legally wed in your state (or in the state you’re getting married in) because making it simple is not part of the process. Still, most places adhere to the basics. According to Martha Stewart Weddings, “A legal ceremony includes a signed, state-issued marriage license and ‘an exchange of promises.'”
In order to make that happen, you need to obtain a marriage license, have an officiant conduct the ceremony, exchange promises (this is usually where the “I do” portion of the ceremony comes in, but this could also be exchanging of rings or doing a handfasting), and getting the necessary signatures on your license before mailing it in. In some states, this means you need to have a couple of in-person witnesses there as well to sign your license and confirm that both parties actually like, want to get married. You know, the whole signed, sealed, delivered? That’s basically the essence of what’s got to go down to make your marriage legal, whether it’s virtual or in-person.
Where You Can Do This Virtually
The hurdle couples are currently having to face is that with courthouses and other state facilities closed, obtaining a marriage license and/or having a ceremony with a legal officiant can be difficult, if not impossible. Some states, like New York, are changing the rules to allow couples to have legally binding virtual weddings, in light of the pandemic. On April 25, New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo issued an executive order which allows New Yorkers to not only obtain marriage licenses remotely, but also allows clerks to perform ceremonies via video calls.
In addition to New York, couples in Colorado are now able to apply for marriage licenses online, and couples in Ohio’s Cuyahoga County can obtain their licenses via video call in special circumstances. Some states have select drive-in hours for obtaining licenses or having a ceremony conducted by a clerk. Call your local office for your location-specific info.
If you managed to obtain your license before the world ended (and it’s still “good”—some last only days and some last months), you can have a willing family member or friend become ordained online through the Universal Life Church or the American Marriage Ministries. This will give them the authority to legally marry you in a non-denominational ceremony. That said, depending on your state’s regulations, your officiant and/or witnesses may need to be in person. (Just please, adhere to the six feet apart rule!) Call your local clerk office or visit their website for your county’s regulations.
A Commitment Ceremony
If your state has a freeze on marriage licenses or their doors are closed (and obtaining one virtually à la New York isn’t an option), that doesn’t mean you can’t have a ceremony to celebrate the big day. Just like your birthday month, when you’re a bride, you get to have as many GD celebrations as you want. That’s just like, the rules of marriage. If you can’t get the license but want to still make a commitment on your original planned date, have a ceremony anyway.
Without a license, you can have a commitment ceremony that feels just as magical, just be careful with how you word it. “A commitment ceremony, while lovely, is not legally binding and has no requirements. It is important that the couple or the officiant not use language to imply a legal marriage is occurring, as this can be construed as fraud,” Diane Smith-Hoban, executive director of the non-denominational officiant group Journeys of the Heart explained to Martha Stewart Weddings.
The only difference between the two ceremonies is that a commitment ceremony isn’t legally binding. But if that’s the day you want, have a ceremony and then sign the paperwork once you’re able. Just because it’s not at the same time, it doesn’t make it any less official. There are tons of tips online about how to have a commitment ceremony, but basically, you just can’t use language that says “you’re married.” Bonus? You don’t need an officiant or anything particular to make it work—it can be entirely your own.
How To Make It Special
So, you’re having a virtual commitment ceremony, whether legally binding or not. THIS IS EXCITING, and don’t let anyone tell you any differently. “We are living during a key point in history and one of the most important moments of your adult life,” says Louisa Rechter and Alessandra Perez-Rubio, the Founders of Mestiza New York. “You will want to document every moment, tell your grandchildren about what happened that day, and pull out the dress you wore as a cherished family heirloom! It will be incredibly special and memorable.”
Utilizing rituals and wedding traditions, such as dances, music, dressing up, and dining, will literally help your mind understand you’re starting a new stage of your life.
Dress The Part: Whether you wear ~the~ dress or order something new, this is the time to get full-on glam. “Do a try-on session with your mom and/or maid of honor. Get their input just as you would at your local bridal salon,” suggests Colavita. Don’t be afraid to wear a non-traditional gown—this is about YOU feeling bridal. While Amazon has delayed shipping for non-essential items, other retailers, such as Rent The Runway, Adrianna Papell, and Mestiza are still fulfilling orders in a timely manner so you can get a gorgeous look in time for your Zoom ceremony.
Set The Stage: Pull out those Christmas lights, order some flowers from a local nursery, have some mimosas while getting ready, and light allllll of the candles. Just because your wedding is different than you originally planned, it doesn’t make it any less special. In fact, considering you’re facing the GLOBAL F*CKING PANDEMIC together and making the best of it, that kind of makes this even more special if you ask me. You’re like, very brave and very pretty. So, live it up! Decorate your space, put on those false lashes, play that perfectly curated prelude music.
Keep The Traditions: Always dreamed of having your dad walk you down the aisle, having your first dance with your hubby, or cutting the cake together? There’s no reason you can’t do all of those long-loved (or hated) traditions. Hell, being at home means you can be even more creative and do exactly what you want. Have a cardboard cutout of your dad made so he can walk down the hallway with you. Sew some dog bones on a garter and toss it to you’re pups after your S.O. removes it. Have a literal cake fight in your backyard. Do it all and do it exactly how you want because the only people that matter are you two.
Document The Experience: Zoom weddings are all the rage right now, so don’t hold back from documenting your day/prep just as you would with an in-person ceremony. Have a hashtag, have a bachelorette party, and spam your feeds with photos just as you would have originally. “Get a selfie stick with a tripod and timer so your significant other can capture the evening. You will want special photos to look back on,” advises Colavita. Just because the celebrations might look a little different, it doesn’t make them any less Insta-worthy.
Soak It Up: I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: This is still your day. This is still your wedding. This is still your marriage. Get dressed up, decorate your space, and have a staycation honeymoon right after. It might feel silly, but go over-the-top making your day feel memorable from home. Someday when you look back, you’ll remember how you started your love story during a very dark time in our history, and honestly? I can’t really think of anything more romantic than that.
Images: Eliza Szablinska / Unsplash; Giphy (3)
There’s no way around it: Coronavirus is f*cking things up. Between healthcare, the economy, and mental wellbeing, this sh*t is, as Kelly Kapoor would say, “B-A-N-A-N-A-S.” In addition to all of the terrible things everyday folks are dealing with, couples who had spring and summer (and maybe fall?) weddings planned are having to change the biggest day of their lives. While it’s heartening to see couples making the best out of a god-awful situation with virtual weddings and proposals, it’s okay to admit that for 2020 brides, this majorly blows.
While weddings and showers are huge parts of the “getting married” celebrations, one of the most anticipated events brides are having to postpone or cancel is their bachelorette parties. With travel restrictions and social distancing in place, getting 15 of your best friends together for a weekend of drinking and debauchery seems like something from a distant world. While it might not be ideal, having a virtual bachelorette party is a great solution to an otherwise dumpster fire of a situation. As someone who recently attended one (and had the hangover to prove it), I’m here to break down the whys and hows of having a virtual bachelorette party that doesn’t suck as much as it sounds like it will.
The Perks Of A Virtual Bachelorette Party
I have to admit: There are actual, real-life, non-coronavirus perks to having a virtual bachelorette party. In addition to saving yourself and your friends so much money, you’ll basically have a meeting where everyone is nice to you and gets you drunk. You don’t have to clean up, you don’t have to coordinate travel and meals and the wants of 12 different people, and you won’t deal with the strain of someone bailing last minute, causing you to pick up their part of the Airbnb and hate them forever.
With a virtual bachelorette party, you can invite more friends to hang out in a low-pressure environment, all while still keeping the important aspects of a bachelorette party intact: getting drunk, playing games, and embarrassing the bride. Here’s how to do it in a way that’ll make you say, “Wait, did I actually just have fun on a video chat?”
1. Theme
While the usual “put a whole bunch of penis stuff on every surface of the hotel room” won’t really work here, you can still make the event feel special. Have the MOH and/or bridesmaids pull together a small budget for the party and use that money toward creating a theme. Send the bride and the virtual guests streamers, signs, photo props, wigs—anything simple that can be hung up and seen from others’ screens. In addition to tangible items, ask all of the guests to pick a virtual background of either an embarrassing picture of the bride or her favorite destination to make it seem like everyone’s really all together.
2. Outfits
One of the best ways to get into the party spirit is to dress up. Just because you’re not physically going anywhere, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t use this as a chance for a bomb Instagram like you would any other bachelorette. Most of the time, the attire goes along with the location, such as cowboy boots in Nashville or sarongs in someplace sunny. Now, however, the sheer act of putting on makeup and a new dress is enough to get excited about. While Amazon has delayed shipping for non-essential items, other wedding-famous retailers, such as Rent The Runway and Adrianna Papell are still fulfilling orders in a timely manner.
“We feel that honoring the bride and bridal party in such a special time in the bride’s life is important,” says Adrianna Papell Director of e-commerce, Caroline Colavita. “Just because we can’t physically be together right now doesn’t mean the bride and her guests don’t deserve to wear something special.” It’s the reason couples are having formal date nights at home and those getting married are still donning their wedding day attire: Getting dressed up makes you feel good. Whether you wear the cocktail gown that’s been sitting in your closet for months or order something new (#StimulateTheEconomy), this is a great excuse to change out of your pajamas for once and see if you still remember how to contour.
3. Favors
Whether it’s personalized koozies to remember the virtual bachelorette party, wine glasses with everyone’s name on them, or just a sh*t-ton of penis straws, favors are a great way to thank the (virtual) guests for coming and make the party feel a little more special and a little more like an in-person bachelorette. In addition to favors for the guests, use part of the budget for a gift to the bride from everyone. Buy her the wedding day robe she’s been eying, an at-home spa kit, or hell, maybe a new vibrator. Whatever it is, just gift her something to make her feel pampered and loved in spite of the circumstances.
4. Alcohol
While the theme and the outfits and the people are important, let’s be real: alcohol is the most important component of any bachelorette party, but especially a virtual one. With everyone in their own homes, utilizing drinking games is an easy way to loosen everyone up and get guests chatting. Drop off some alcohol at the bride’s house (leave it at the door, duh) or have some delivered for her event. Whether you incorporate shot glasses, funnels, or chambongs is up to you, but waking up the next day just as hungover as you would at any other bachelorette party is the goal (except now you don’t have to worry about passing out at the bar or going home with a rando), so drink responsibly and appropriately. And by that, I mean do the bride proud and at least brown out.
5. Games
Games, though sometimes mocked, are crucial to any in-person or virtual bachelorette party. Not only do they help break the ice, but they’re a great way to get guests drinking, laughing, and making the bride feel special. Below are a few tried-and-true games that work just as great virtually as they do in person.
Drink Every Time You Say: Whether it’s “bride,” “wedding,” or “coronavirus,” this simple game is a must for literally any social situation. Granted, once you get drunk enough you’ll forget you’re playing, but whatever. It just really kicks things off. Pick a word (or words) and if anyone says it, they have to drink. Call each other out and watch as your friends go from sober to “I’M HAVING THE BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE” like that!
Guess The Panties: Have each guest order a pair of underwear for the bride (ensure they choose the “gift” option so their names aren’t on the packaging). At the party, the bride will pull each pair out and guess who she thinks purchased them for her. If she gets it right, the buyer has to take a drink. If she gets it wrong, she has to take a drink and keep guessing until she gets it correct.
Name The Ex: Before the party, have the bride write down the most scandalous things she’s done with all of her exes (along with the names of who she did them with). Shoot for 10-15 (or at least one for each guest). At the party, read an act to each guest and have her guess which ex she thinks was involved. If she gets it right, the bride drinks, if she gets it wrong, she drinks.
Porn or Polish: One of the most classic bachelorette party games can be played virtually. Have the MOH download the questions and the answers and ask the group one at a time. Each guest has to type whether she thinks the option is the name of a porn film or the name of a nail polish. Once everyone’s answers are submitted, the MOH will tell the answer and will assign everyone who got it wrong to take a drink.
Ask The Groom: Have the MOH email the groom a list of questions to secretly answer. At the party, have the bride guess his answers to the questions. If she gets it right, she gets to tell someone to drink. If she gets it wrong, however, she has to drink.
6. Social That Sh*t
Just because you’re not getting blacked out on Bourbon Street or chugging on the Vegas strip, it doesn’t make your event any less important. Utilize a hashtag just as you would with any other bachelorette to make social media bystanders feel left out included and make sure to have your husband/boyfriend/partner/self-timer take some bomb photos of you in your outfit. Take screenshots of the virtual group, take selfies chugging, and share the love in your stories. With so few events to look forward to, go as extra as humanly possible—trust us, you’ve earned it. With a little bit of flexibility and a whole lot of vodka, your virtual bachelorette party will truly be the night you’ll never remember, just as you always hoped.
Images: Sergii Sobolevskyi / Shutterstock.com; Giphy (2); Rachel Varina
