Stop Blaming Your Relationship Problems On Astrology

“Why do all you girls put your sign in your dating profile?” I was on a date (yes, success!) and we veered into the category of “other people on the apps.” I made fun of all the pictures of dudes with fish, and the number of men seeking “ethically” non-monogamous relationships. My date wanted to know why the women he saw on the apps cared so much about his astrological sign. He thinks it’s full B.S., even less meaningful than a Meyers-Briggs or Enneagram delineation. 

Ok, Does Anyone *Really* Date Based On Astrology?

It might seem like nobody is actually dating based on their zodiac sign and it’s all for the memes—Teen Vogue ran an article saying astrology doesn’t matter—and yet, next down on the Google search, was a piece from the same outlet on who one should date based on astrological signs. Still need more proof to know you’re not the only one filtering out Scorpios? Bumble says their star sign filter is their most used qualifier. MTV says one third of the young people (Gen Z) use astrology to determine their compatibility with a date.  

I took to the internet to ask who believes the fault is in our stars when it comes to love. I got a wide range of responses. Maud Waterman, a Los Angeles based filmmaker, instead of bread baking or TikTok content creation, used her free time during the pandemic to study astrology. She says, “I’m definitely a believer! If you had asked about a year and a half ago I would have been a skeptic, but I did an unfathomable amount of studying (yeah, I’ve got textbooks) over quarantine and I now use astrology in my daily life.” I heard from several astrologers who operate in person, on the internet, or even on TV. I heard from an aura photographer (which I guess is a thing), crystal specialists, and psychics. What color is your aura, do you think? I hope mine’s purple.

I heard from skeptics who think, like my date, that it’s all a bunch of hocus pocus, and people like Michelle Davies—a life coach and editor of The Best Ever Guide to Life—who used to believe in astrology until it started negatively affecting her relationship. She says, “It’s because I was looking at our relationship dynamics through the lens of astrology, disregarding that certain things can be worked at through free will and effort.” Now she can think of astrology as a suggestion, but not a mandate. 

I won’t name names, but some people have been dumped for their obsession with astrology, and there are people who swear by it anyway and would rather die (or stay single) than date an Aries. I interviewed two experts for further information on the psychology behind astrology and how it relates to the psychology of love: Clarissa Silva, Behavioral Scientist/Relationship Coach, who can be called a skeptic; and Maria Shaw, psychic astrologer and reality star, who has done readings on the eighth season of 90 Day Fiancé. 

Ask The Experts

Even if you’re the most diehard horoscope checker, Silva says, “Astrological signs are labels, not dating deal breakers.” She adds, “Determining actual compatibility is far more complex.” I agree that it makes sense that one little piece of the personality puzzle is not enough to seal your fate, even if they are a Scorpio. 

Shaw agrees. She says that, even if a reading shows that two people are not meant to be together, she would never tell someone what to do in their relationship. She also believes that you can’t simply look at someone’s sun sign to know compatibility. You need to do their full “star chart,” which entails using accurate info about the time, place, and day you were born. This gives a full picture of one’s past lives, present personality, and future path. 

But What If You’re Dating A Skeptic… Or A Sagittarius?

Can you still use astrology to inform your decisions about the relationship if the other person thinks it’s woo-woo nonsense? Shaw says, “Use the astrology as a tool for yourself. Don’t push your opinions to get them to believe.” That said, you can still arm yourself with all the information, should you so choose: “Knowledge is power,” she says. If you simply can’t go on a second date without the full astrological picture, Shaw advises, “Get their birth information, find out about them, and decide if you want to go forward on this. You want to know where this thing is gonna lead.”  She does emphasize getting consent from the person before charting their stars, but says it’s okay to use the information to inform yourself on whether or not you want to stay in a relationship—much like any other information you might find out in your routine pre-date social media stalking.

Silva, on the other hand, warns that this kind of judgment “can result in meaningless or erroneous predictions on compatibility.” She elaborates, “Astrology provides a layer of the complexity of personality but can’t make predictions on compatibility and long term happiness.” She says you can use astrology “as an entertainment source or a source of providing hope or direction for those that seek out this as guidance,” but that astrology is quite literally fake news: “a pseudoscience because it hasn’t passed the rigor of scientific inquiry to qualify as evidence-based.” Believers are going to say that something as intuitive as astrology cannot be studied by science, but many skeptics are going to insist on peer-reviewed evidence before committing to a life led by the stars. 

Shaw has patience with the idea of skeptics. She says people who are getting wrong information are either not looking at the full picture or are getting information from a suboptimal source. Some websites copy info from other sources or from looking at only the sun sign instead of the sun, rising, and moon signs, not to mention the planetary alignment at the time of your birth. Still, when I summed this up on my next date with the skeptic, his eyes rolled so hard they got stuck that way and he had to go to the doctor (not fact). 

Does Astrology Matter?

So, here’s why people use star charts to guide them in their relationships: either they truly believe in it, or they find it fun. None of us knows what we’re doing, so any guidance that gives us the answers we seek is going to be welcome. Just like I really shouldn’t be dating Slytherins anymore, someone might take a personality profile of a Taurus and use it as a reason to say, “Thank you, next.” Conversely, maybe a Ravenclaw with a Hufflepuff rising like myself can read an Aquarius’ profile and swoon, while knowing his sign won’t guarantee he isn’t a dick whistle. 

As for me, I’m an astrology agnostic. I can’t know whether or not my tendency to multitask and chat is due to my being a Gemini or some other mix of nature and nurture. But isn’t it fun to dream? As we ended our call, Shaw said that, according to the planets, “We’re coming into a romantic period. We’re going to see people getting back to being romantic and wooing people. People want to fall in love and be in love.” Aw.

A skeptic might say that we’re getting into a romantic period because we’ve been locked in our houses in our sweatpants all winter. But either way, isn’t it nice to imagine that, as the plague recedes, there are people out there, maybe a soul mate or, as Shaw put it, “a past life connection,” ready to “walk your path?” Whether it is written in the stars or not, as we head into a potentially disease-free summer, full of starry nights and warm breezes, I wish you love, or, at least, some fun with a handsome Pisces. 

Image: Lucas Ottone / Stocksy.com

Are Kourtney Kardashian & Scott Disick Astrologically Compatible?

Another day, another excuse to watch Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Say what you will about the show and the family, but I simply can’t get enough. It’s nearly impossible for me to pick a favorite Kardashian family member, but I do have a soft spot for a few of them. Kris Jenner is probably my number-one, although, I’m not gonna lie, Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick are right up there with the momager herself. Actually, scratch that. Penelope wins. Hands down. Needless to say, this is what happens when Aries and Gemini become one – they make the most adorable children. Besides, I can’t be the only one who still has hope for Kourtney and Scott, right?

On that note, and in celebration of Kourtney’s 40th birthday, let’s take a closer look at Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick’s astrological compatibility, shall we? For starters, Kourt is an Aries powerhouse, and Scott is a mischievous Gemini. That in itself speaks volumes, considering the astrological elements fire and air are both masculine, and in harmony with one another. So, if this on-again-off-again couple’s sizzling chemistry has driven you crazy over the years, it’s no coincidence. We all feel it. However, that’s just scratching the surface, considering we’re only looking at their sun signs. It gets deeper.

Capricorn Moon vs. Sagittarius Moon

On the dark side, Scott and Kourt have a number of differences, starting with their sense of security. According to Astrotheme, Kourt was born with her moon in pragmatic Capricorn, which means she comes across as cold and heartless, when in reality, she is simply repressing her emotions as a form of self-discipline. Capricorn is determined, traditional, and realistic, as the sign of the mystical goat will climb the mountain willingly, and without stopping.

Scott, however, was born with an adventurous moon in Sagittarius, as per Astrotheme. To top it off, his moon is conjunct Jupiter, Sagittarius’ ruler, which only intensifies his lust for life, and need to venture into unknown territory. See, Sagittarius is spontaneous, undaunted, and overly-optimistic. In other words, this energy couldn’t be more enthusiastic if it tried, hence Scott’s hysterical party monster moments on KUWTK. Kourtney, on the other hand, won’t have any of that!

Sofia Richie & Scott Disick

Now, not to take the focus off our birthday girl Kourt, but if we actually consider the astrological facts, Sofia Richie is ten times more compatible with Scott, and for so many reasons. For starters, Geminis love what they can’t have, and I don’t doubt that Scott secretly digs the age difference between him and Sofia…but there’s more. Sofia was born with a Sagittarius ascendant, which just so happens to compliment Scott’s rambunctious moon-Jupiter conjunction. As a matter of fact, Scott’s moon conjuncts Sofia’s ascendant, which means they’re not only emotionally compatible, they’re also extremely in tune with each other’s needs.

Something else that caught my attention is that Sofia’s moon in harmony-loving Libra trines Scott’s sun-Mars conjunction in Gemini. This is some powerful synastry, and I’ll tell you why. In astrology, the moon is considered feminine, and the sun masculine, which would mean Sofia’s intuition naturally compliments Scott’s ego and spirit. Also, whenever there’s a moon-Mars synastry aspect, there is sexual compatibility, and for these two it’s double trouble: Sofia’s Mars in Leo trines Scott’s moon in Sagittarius, and Scott’s Mars in Gemini trines Sofia’s moon in Libra. Sounds utterly complex, I know, but I think their current relationship status speaks for itself, don’t you think?

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What more can a guy ask for. THREE’S COMPANY

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So while Scott and Kourtney have some pretty solid astrological compatibility, I wouldn’t expect them to get back together anytime soon, if ever. According to the stars, Scott and Sofia have a strong bond, and I’m not sure it would be wise for Kourtney to get in the middle of that. Either way, she’s looking amazing at 40, so she’s clearly got some good karma going.

Images: Giphy (2); @letthelordbewithyou / Instagram

What Chris Pratt & Katherine Schwarzenegger’s Astrology Means For Their Engagement

I hear wedding bells, betches. Chris Pratt and Katherine Schwarzenegger are engaged, and well, you’d think Chris would have waited until the ink dried on his divorce papers, but I guess celebrities are not just like us. (I’m kidding! Even Chris’ ex-wife is thrilled about his impending nuptials, which is totally normal and not at all a façade for the media.) Anywho, according to the Daily Mail, the couple decided to tie the knot after just seven months of dating. And I can’t even get guys to admit we’re together after seven months of dating. Cool.

This, of course, leaves me no choice but to analyze Chris Pratt and Katherine Schwarzenegger’s astrological compatibility before they walk down the aisle. BTW, have I mentioned Christopher is 10 years older than his fiancée? (I am such a fan of this age gap!) Anyway, when I first looked at their compatibility, the first thing I thought was, holy sh*t balls! The sexual chemistry between these two is EVERYTHING, and I’ll tell you why.

Katherine Schwarzenegger

For starters, don’t let Schwarzenegger’s salt-of-the-earth vibes fool you. Dare I say, the 29-year-old author is an undercover sex kitten, and a force to be reckoned with. Born with the sun in adventurous Sagittarius, Schwarzenegger is spontaneous, freedom-loving, and a lover of the unknown. To top it off, she was born with Mars (sex drive), Pluto (power), and Lilith (our shadow side) in Scorpio. *Insert shocked emoji here.* FYI: The energy of Scorpio is intensely passionate, deeply emotional, and TOTALLY vengeful—kind of like all your Scorpio friends.

Femme Fatale much? The bride-to-be is a highly passionate woman with a smoldering intensity. On another note, however, her gracious ruling planet Jupiter (luck and expansion) was sitting directly over her moon in sensitive Cancer (emotions and sense of nurture) at her time of birth. I know, WTF does this even mean? Well, for starters, our girl is emotional AF, eerily intuitive, and a true Mommy’s girl. Funny enough, a source told PEOPLE that Maria Shriver (Schwarzenegger’s mother) helped set her up with Pratt. Kudos to Mom.

Chris Pratt

The Guardians of the Galaxy actor was born with his sun (ego) and Venus (seduction style and type of woman he’s attracted to) in the curious sign Gemini, which also happens to be Sagittarius’ complete opposite. However, this is actually a good thing, as both of these zodiac signs complement each other, and work via the same astrological axis. (Chances are, he fusses over the meticulous details, and she focuses on the bigger picture.) Pratt’s sun and Venus are hovering over his eighth house of sex and regeneration, which means transformation is a prominent theme in his life, both personally and in regards to his relationships.

The 39-year-old actor also has a Moon-Mars conjunction in Taurus (which means the moon and Mars were sitting VERY close at his time of birth) in his seventh house of relationships and acquaintances, which tells me he can be ridiculously stubborn, and confrontational when crossed. Put it this way: the moon represents his emotions, and Mars ignites the fire. Meaning, his emotions can be explosive, and fuel rather easily. On a brighter note, Pratt’s sensuality is strong, and he thrives when he can indulge in the pleasures of life alongside his SO.

Are They Compatible?

Now, astrology is infinite, and there’s a whole other level to each of their birth charts. However, one thing’s for sure, and it’s that these two are INTENSE AF, so you can already imagine what happens when you combine both energies, considering that their personalities are innately polarizing and ruthlessly set in their ways. It’s my way or the highway for Pratt and Schwarzenegger, and I highly doubt either of them would ever compromise. (That’s not a good thing.)

Furthermore, and say what you will, but it’s safe to say Pratt is completely infatuated with his bride-to-be. While this is something you typically expect in a serious relationship, there’s a dark side to it as well.

For instance, Schwarzenegger’s Mars (sex drive), Pluto (power), and Lilith (taboo side) are sitting right over Pratt’s Ascendant (sense of self) and Uranus (inner rebel) in smoldering Scorpio. In astrology, Mars ignites the fire, and it’s also Scorpio’s traditional planetary ruler, which means this energy is working at its FULL potential. Meaning, it’s red, hot, and horny AF.

This could bring intense passion, but it could also consist of ego trips and dark manipulation tactics. Also, and not to keep making this about sex (it’s all Christopher’s fault), but Schwarzenegger’s energy sort of sparked a sexual revolution for Pratt, liberating him in an extreme and profound way.

Sadly, we don’t have Schwarzenegger’s time of birth, so I couldn’t tell you their astrological synastry more in-depth. However, I think by now you have a better idea of their vibe as a couple. It’s Fifty Shades of Pratt, all day.

Images: Giphy (3)

Are Justin Bieber And Hailey Baldwin Astrologically Compatible?

Am I the only one who can’t seem to process the fact that Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin are in fact husband and wife? Is this some sort of sick joke? OK, cat’s out of the bag, betches. I am obviously a ride-or-die Jelena fan, and well, some of us are still hoping this wedding falls under the fake news of 2018 bucket. (I can’t be alone here.) However, from the looks of it, the Bieber-Baldwin newlywed PDA is just as real as it is obnoxious. OK, I’m done being a Debbie Downer. Let’s cut to the chase, and talk about the astro compatibility of these two love birds, because believe it or not, it’s a vibe.

For starters, let’s get one thing straight, and it’s that we can’t judge a book by its cover. As you know, Justin Bieber was born under the dreamy sign of Pisces, and Hailey Baldwin has her sun in the sign of the adventurous archer. Right off the bat, we know that these signs aren’t compatible, considering water (Pisces) and fire (Sagittarius) don’t typically mesh well by nature. That’s not all we should be taking into consideration, but sadly, we don’t have Baldwin’s time of birth. (Not to worry, betches. We’ve got Bieber’s birth time on deck, as per astrotheme, and I’ll get into that in a minute.)

Jupiter’s Children

In the meantime, let’s go over the basics. Pisces and Sagittarius are both mutable signs, which means Bieber and Baldwin do in fact have some similarities, in the sense that they’re both adaptable, changeable, and prefer going with the flow. However, keep in mind, looking to see if two sun signs are compatible is merely scratching the surface. Nevertheless, the newlyweds are both ruled by expansive Jupiter, and this caught my attention from the very beginning. Lucky Jupiter rules Sagittarius, and it’s also Pisces’ traditional ruler in astrology.

Since we don’t have Baldwin’s birth time, I have to point out that the 22-year-old model was born on the very first day (and degree) of Sagittarius. TBH, she very well might have been born on the last degree of Scorpio, considering the sun changed signs on her birthday. Either way, she’s still a Scorpio-Sagittarius cusp, and FYI the Biebs has a sh*t ton of Scorpionic influence in his chart. Although, going back to these two being children of oh-so-gracious Jupiter, there’s really nothing this celebrity couple wouldn’t do together. Their contagious optimism is constantly flowing, and their larger-than-life personalities clearly thrive off the PDA.

The Dark Side Of The Biebs

Word. Now let’s talk about the Biebs for a second, because this Pisces is a lot more complex than you think. For starters, he was born with a smoldering Scorpio rising, AKA ascendant, conjunct his Pluto and North Node in Scorpio. Holy sh*t and a half. Intense is an understatement, betch. FYI: Pluto rules Scorpio, so having this sexy Voldemort planet sitting directly over his Ascendant, only magnifies its power. There’s more. His Pluto is also sitting alongside his North Node, which represents his “spiritual path,” in this lifetime. One thing’s for sure: themes related to power, transformation, sexuality, sacrifice, karma, and universal compassion are prominent themes in Justin Bieber’s life.

The Biebs has definitely gone through some intense rebirths, and TBH, marrying Hailey Baldwin still feels like a Scorpio rising fixation (or perhaps revenge?), but again, that’s just the vibe I get. On another note, Bieber most definitely benefits from Hailey’s Sagittarius-like qualities, considering Pisces’ energy naturally struggles with taking initiative, and getting things done. In other words, Baldwin’s fiery energy most definitely compliments Bieber’s ambiguous waters. Also, as per astrotheme, Hailey’s sun conjuncts her Pluto in Sagittarius, which means she, too, has an air of Plutonian mystery to her, which obviously drives Bieber wild.

Besides, who are we kidding? Hailey Baldwin is hot AF.

Pisces Sun Vs. Virgo Mars

Bieber’s sun in Pisces is directly opposed Baldwin’s Mars in Virgo, which can definitely cause some friction in the relationship. The sun is proud and Mars asserts itself; meanwhile, both of these planets are at odds. Now, this could also ignite a surge of passion, but those red-hot feels could also spark disagreements within the relationship.

Moreover, these two have something extra cosmic, in regards to their compatibility, and it’s called a Moon-Venus conjunction. Baldwin has her Venus in its home sign Libra, and the Biebs has his moon in the same sign. FYI: Venus thrives in the sign of Libra, as it is its sign of rulership, and the planet of love, beauty, and relationships. The moon, however, represents our emotions and sense of nurture, so can you imagine the deliciousness of Moon-Venus in Libra? TBH, I dare to say that this aspect is what ultimately sealed the deal. Aside from their Jupiterian love story, of course. Thanks to this, these two have no issue showing affection towards one another, let alone connecting on an emotional level.

Are Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin compatible?

You could be the judge of that.

Images: Giphy (3)