7 B.S. Wedding Traditions You Can Totally Skip

When it comes to 2020 weddings, there are no rules. As a fellow bride-to-be, I’ve realized there are a lot of wedding traditions I’m not into. While you may feel guilty about not doing everything your mom did at her wedding, just think, there were probably some traditions her mother did that she boycotted (it’s a vicious cycle, you see?). For example, my grandma told me it used to be tradition that the bride changed out of her dress at the end of the night and put on a suit to go off on her honeymoon. Sounds miz, right? I’m assuming all I’ll want to do is change into sweats and PTFO. My mom sure as hell didn’t do that, and I bet yours didn’t either, so don’t feel guilty about skipping one of these seven wedding traditions that should prob be retired any way. 

Gender-Specific Wedding Parties

Look, it’s 2020. Gender fluid, gender neutral, whatever you want to call it, we can all agree that the gender lines are blurring, and therefore, there’s no reason to be a stickler about your best friend from college standing on the groom’s “side” because of the gender he was assigned at birth. Mix it up and go half boys and half girls, have your brother stand on your side, etc. Nobody’s going to be sitting at the ceremony whispering, “oh my God I can’t believe she has a GUY standing on HER side,” and if they do, they’re a f*cking idiot and shouldn’t be invited in the first place. Plus, women’s pantsuits are so in right now, so if you’re a woman in the groom’s wedding party, just channel your inner Ariana Madix circa Tom and Katie’s wedding and own that sh*t. 

Your Parents Giving You Away

This may have been a thing back in the 1800s when literal 14-year-olds got married because they were going to die by age 30, but now that you’re a grown-ass adult, there’s no need for mommy or daddy to “give you away”. The whole idea of them handing off ownership to your spouse is pretty objectifying, IMO. Not to mention, not every person has a great relationship with their parents, and this wedding tradition can just put extra pressure on an already tense dynamic. If you want to skip this one but still compromise, you can have them walk in front of you, or at the beginning of the procession with the groom’s family if they’re salty about you walking solo. 

Gift Exchange

IDK who invented the idea that couples need to give each other gifts before the wedding ceremony, but isn’t like, your marriage enough of a gift? Yes, I know that sounds cheesy, but when it comes to saving money, I will use all the cliches I can to get me out of buying a really expensive watch for my fiancé (sorry, babe!). Writing a personal note should be gift enough, since you prob just spent your life savings on this massive party. I am officially launching my campaign to end pre-wedding gift exchanges between couples. WHO’S WITH ME?! I’ll take this all the way to Congress if I have to. 

Wearing a Veil

I know this is one I’ll catch a lot of heat for, and I’m ready for it. When I discovered the historical meaning behind why brides wear veils, I was appalled. Basically, wearing a veil was intended to keep the groom from seeing the bride until she got up to the altar so he wouldn’t see her and run for the hills. Wow, that is so thoughtful of the inventors of the veil to hide the bride’s face until it’s too late in case the groom didn’t like her looks. A more modern-day reason to pass on a veil is the cost. Do you really want to spend $800 on a piece of tulle? I’m sure most of you reading this think I’m a veil-hater and are probably still going to wear one, but I’m just here to tell you that if you’re on the fence and the notion of “tradition” is preventing you from doing you, I’m here to tell you that it’s perfectly okay if you don’t wear one.

Evening Weddings

I’d venture to guess that the majority of weddings take place at night (mine will be), but if you’re not into the idea of a nighttime party, why not start it earlier in the day? My cousin is having a brunch reception that goes all day and I’m not going to lie, I am STOKED. The idea of eating brunch food, getting wasted, and being in bed by 7pm sounds like heaven on earth. Is that an over exaggeration? Probably, but let’s face it, I can’t stay up all night anymore and so the idea of getting the party started early, and ending it early, sounds lovely. Plus, all-you-can-eat brunch food? Hmm, maybe I should change my start time to 11am.

Bouquet/Garter Toss

The only thing worse than being seated at the singles’ table is the dreaded bouquet and garter toss. As if a guy literally crawling up his wife’s dress in front of his entire family isn’t mortifying enough, think of all the single guests at your wedding you’ll humiliate when you toss a bunch of flowers at their faces. Also, someone could get SERIOUSLY injured. At my friend’s wedding last year she hiked the football bouquet like an NFL Pro-Bowler and almost took out half of her single guests. I mean, respect, but drunk people don’t have the best reflexes, so that could have been a massacre. 

Wedding Cake

My fiancé doesn’t like frosting (I know, he’s literally a serial killer) and I don’t want an icing-free cake at our wedding, so we’re not having one at all. We’re doing a donut wall instead because I’m #basicandproud, and that way people can bring their dessert on the dance floor. We also realized that at the last four weddings we’ve gone to, we didn’t eat the cake. It’s my personal goal to make sure every guest feels sickly full at the end of the night and they can’t get there with a small slice of cake, so bring on the dessert bar! If you want a cake just for the photo opp, your caterer might be able to whip up something small so you can at least have the picture. 

The new wedding rules are that there are no rules, so don’t be afraid to do you. As long as you have good booze and awesome music, everyone will have a good time. 

Images: IVASH Studio / Shutterstock; betchesluvthis, betchesbrides, jayacancook / Twitter

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The Biggest Wedding Dress Trends You’ll See Next Year, According To An Expert

Assuming you haven’t been living in a cave for the last month, you are likely aware that fall is in full effect, and the new wedding season has been formally kicked off by The Biebers’ second exchange of vows (because apparently one wedding isn’t enough). While no one expects non-celebrity brides to deliver extravagance at the level that celeb weddings often do, living in the age of Instagram means competition abounds in the world of weddings (even for us common folk). And though I am still not over the fact that Hailey put “Till death do us part” on her actual wedding veil,  her dress is hardly the only source for gown inspo. That’s why we spoke to Azazie designer Peter Hale Cooney to get the scoop on all the wedding dress trends coming soon to an aisle near you. 

Perhaps it is best to start with what trends are officially ~out~. Peter predicts that we will be saying goodbye to “frivolous and over the top accoutrements on dresses.” This, of course, means that the tired popular trend of “crystal and bead encrusted” dresses is going into hibernation. Thinking feathers? Think again. Basically, any attempt to recreate Beyoncé’s iconic Met Gala 2012 dress should be stopped in its tracks. Put the feathers and the jewels down (you too, Kim). 

This does not, however, mean an end to glamour. Peter assures us, “I think we’re going to see the return of romantic dressing.” This could mean a range of styles including everything from “voluminous silhouettes to pared down, simplistic dress.” You can even hold onto the sexier vibe that brides with conservative parents on Say Yes To The Dress butt heads over, with “nods to lingerie” in your gown of choice. Hoe, but make it bridal.

Cooney also predicts plenty of “diaphanous fabrics” (I looked it up, and it means light and translucent) and “lovely lace fabrics.” Lace, in particular, is a point of emphasis in the romantic aesthetic of future wedding dresses. “Nothing says romance more than a fine lace,” Cooney adds.

Perhaps the trend I am most looking forward to seeing on my Insta feed is the return of 60s and 70s styles. Maybe it’s all the Mad Men I’ve been binging getting to my head, but a Megan Draper ensemble on a wedding aisle sounds pretty dreamy to me (even if she is the most annoying character in the show). Cooney predicts the era will manifest in details like “easy breezy shapes, long sleeves,” and “slightly rebellious ensembles.” 

 

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This view is so much better with you! 🌄👰🤵❤️⁠ Link in bio to shop our Stevie bridal gown! 😍 ⁠ Photographer: @alexmari_⁠ ⁠ #brides #bridesrings #bridesproposals#bridetobe #engaged #engagement#engagementring #wedding #weddings#weddinginspiration #weddinginspo#weddingday #weddingplanning#weddingdress #bridesmag#realwedding #ido #love #justsaidyes#weddingphotography #weddingideas#girls #girlgang #squad #squadgoals#bff #bridesmaids #bridalparty⁠

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To the brides out there who stick their noses up at tradition, you’re in for a treat, because color may be an unconventional trend that is becoming, well, conventional. According to Peter, “color has been making its way into bridal collections for many seasons now. I think soft pastel shades incorporated into dresses are absolutely stunning.” 

As for bridesmaids, another increasingly popular shift away from tradition is mixing and matching dresses. “In this day of body positivity I know brides want all the members of their party to feel as comfortable as they do beautiful. This means different dresses for different figures.” As a matter of fact, dresses may not even be a necessity anymore. Cooney boasted about all of the bridal party jumpsuits Azazie is getting ready to drop, gushing that he “love this development for bridal parties.”

 

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All smiles for these beauty Dusty Sage bridesmaids! ☺️✨ Link in bio to shop!⁠ ⁠ Styles from left to right: Summer, Hazel, Jael⁠ dress color: dusty sage⁠ groom & best man skinny tie: dusty sage⁠ photographer: @orangephotographie⁠ Bride: @summit.and.sage ⁠ Groom: @chris.ryan.111⁠ Bridesmaids: @kensydin @samanthasidun @emmie.sidun ⁠ Bestman: @knj_55⁠

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All trends and traditions aside though, Peter believes first and foremost that a ceremony should be designed around the bride and groom’s own tastes. “I’m in the school of thought that there is no rule book when it comes to your big day. From venue, to ceremony, to style of dresses worn. Stick to the vision you have that reflects you and your partner best and it is sure to be an unforgettable day.”

Images: Izabelle Acheson / Unsplash; azazie / Instagram; Azazie.com

12 White Outfit Options For Your Bridal Shower

Working in retail, I’m constantly bombarded by frantic brides amidst their seemingly never-ending search for that ~perfect~ bridal shower dress. It’s a tough journey to embark on, but I selflessly join them because nothing is more satisfying than seeing that twinkle in her eye and giant grin across her face when she finally does find her dream bridal shower dress, and I was the one who helped her do so. Okay, maybe it’s not that selfless after all now that I’m saying it out loud. But anyway, finding the perfect bridal shower dress is no easy feat. These stressed out brides-to-be are consistently the pickiest and hardest to please customers that I encounter. They have this idealized picture in their head of the perfect outfit, and refuse to settle for anything less. And of course, my job in all of this is ensuring they don’t have to settle.

All that being said, in order to help relieve those of you on the aforementioned treacherous journey and, more importantly, relieve your poor mother who has been to every store in the tri-state area with you, I’m here to share my wisdom regarding bridal shower outfits. You know, so you don’t have to get to the point where you’re that 30-year-old grown-ass woman yelling at her mother in the fitting rooms. Oh, trust me, it happens…and it happens way more often than you would probably think. Check out these bridal shower dress options.

Classic White Mini Dress

Trudy Embroidered Floral Dress, $198

BEC&BRIDGE Ze’bre Sleeve Dress, $370

Amanda Uprichard Topanga Mini Dress, $216

Now, your bridal shower ensemble should reflect the same mood/vibe of your future wedding, while also remaining seasonally appropriate. If you read my previous article on rehearsal dinner recommendations, it’s basically the same spiel. You’ve got to stick to a theme and embrace it. Plus, think about how much better your Insta grid will look if all your wedding event photos are consistent, just saying. Anyway, you really can’t go wrong with a classic and cute white mini dress. To quote big-time magazine editor Jenna Rink, it’s the epitome of “thirty, flirty, and thriving.” And, before you freak out on me, even if you’re not actually 30 yet you still get my point. It’s that cute, I-got-my-sh*t-together vibe that we all strive for in life, and you, in particular, strive to emulate at your bridal shower.

White Jumpsuit

BB Dakota Just One Look Jumpsuit, $84.99

Gabri Jumpsuit, $335

Reformation Fay Jumpsuit, $198

Honestly, who doesn’t love a great jumpsuit? It’s an easy outfit option that you can actually function in. Of course, I’ve never actually been to a bridal shower, so not exactly sure how much mobility they require, but it’s always nice to not be constricted in a form fitting body-con. Plus, you can easily re-wear a jumpsuit. Knowing that you can actually rewear the jumpsuit post-shower should help you justify the purchase.

White Maxi/Midi Dress

Reformation Butterfly Dress $278

Astrid Dress, $538

Cinq a Sept Dakota Dress, $395

If you’re going for a more conservative look, I suggest opting for a midi or maxi dress. Yes, it’s kind of an extra option, but you wouldn’t want to offend your judge-y grandmother with a shorty-short romper, so just go with that as your excuse for being extra. You’re not extra, you’re just respecting your elders! But, if you would rather wear a romper, see below…

White Romper

Amanda Uprichard Gimlet Romper, $216

NBD Warren Romper, $94

Alice + Olivia Sicily Halter Neck Romper, $285

The romper is the more casual sister to the jumpsuit. It makes for a complete and easy outfit that also, ideally, has the added benefit of pockets. You’ll need those pockets to store your Xanax and travel-size vodka bottles for when your mother-in-law starts driving you mad or for when you go into a full mental breakdown over all this wedding planning. At least you can chill knowing your bridal shower dress is taken care of.

At the very least, I hope I gave you some guidance in regards to your potential bridal shower dress or outfit. At the end of the day, you want to pick whatever you feel the best in and something that gives you undeniable confidence, even without liquid courage. Ideally, you’ll only be having this party once, so get yourself a great outfit and have the time of your life, complete with mimosa in hand.

Images: gbarkz / Unsplash; Anthropologie; Revolve (5); South Moon Under (2); Free People (4); Nordstrom; Reformation (2)
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Where To Shop All Of Aleen’s #Drexico Bachelorette Styles

If you’re a true Betches devotee, you already know that CEO Aleen Kuperman celebrated her bachelorette in style down in Tulum, Mexico over Cinco de Mayo weekend. From day 1, Aleen was serving looks that will inspire any bride-to-be when it comes to packing for her own bachelorette. We’re taking you day by day and night by night of each and every outfit, from sandals to earrings and everything in between, so you know exactly where to buy her favorite pieces. And don’t forget to check out her hashtag #Drexico for a full look at the weekend.

Day 1:

 

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For the first day Aleen rocked a bikini top and bottom by L*Space accented by a knitted sarong by Lovers + Friends. Schutz slide sandals, and Quay sunglasses from FashionPass. Not pictured is her wooden/wicker bag, that can be found here.

When it came to the night time, Aleen kept up with the bridal theme with a white crop top by Amuse Society, a sparkly skort by Tularosa, tan slip on heels by Aldo, and of course, a tequila soda.

Day 2:

 

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Aleen ditched white for neon green for day two and has officially made neon bridal a thing. And her neon bathing suit by ZAFUL only costs $20. To cover up she went for a white button crop top by Privacy Please, cut off shorts by AGOLDE, and white Steven Slides.

For the night time activities, Aleen lit it up in a silver sparkly crop tank by Frasier Sterling, white cut off AGOLDE shorts, and PVC sandals by ZARA.

Day 3:

By day 3 Aleen was straight living in a PilyQ bikini top and L*Space bikini bottom. Honestly, at this point she was sick of putting outfits together, so skipping a coverup and shoes was a great way to keep things simple.

She did rally into the night and brought back festive white attire with a crop top, floral mini skirt, and the sandals from the night before.

If you were loving all of Aleen’s looks, now you know exactly where to get them. Hangover sold separately, obviously.

5 Bachelorette Party Outfits For The Bride-To-Be Under $100

Being a bride (or soon-to-be bride) is the one time in your life when it is socially acceptable to demand attention pretty much at all times for a constant year and a half. So you might as well milk this brief chapter of your life for all it’s worth. All eyes are going to be on you anyway, so you might as well look hot af for every party in your honor leading up to it! You should be looking your best for your engagement party, bridal party, and, of course, bachelorette party. Go out with a f*cking bang! (But like, not a literal bang. You want to have a weekend of fun while looking hot, not throw away the entire wedding over a sloppy tequila-induced one-night stand in Vegas. Just like, keep it PG with some tacky male strippers, okay?) So with that said, I found a bunch of bachelorette party outfits for the bride-to-be. (You could totally get away with wearing them for other occasions, too.) These different outfit options are totally affordable, and will guarantee that you look your absolute hottest for your last big party sans wedding ring.

1. Strappy Jumpsuit

superdown Kathleen Strappy Jumpsuit, $88

Anyone who has ever tried to go shopping for white jeans knows how unforgiving of a color white can often be. But, given that it’s pretty much the law to wear white in all your parties leading up to your wedding day, you’re going to need to figure out how to wear it the right way. This strappy jumpsuit is the perfect piece for your bachelorette weekend because it’s sexy, but in a classy mature way. Like, it’s not innocent enough looking that all your friends will forget about your hoe college days, but at least enough for them to forget that one time you flashed a frat guy for a Natty Lite.

2. Mini Dress

superdown Shannan Mini Dress, $66

This dress screams bride-to-be in the least tacky way possible. It will let everyone know that you’re the bride-to-be without you having to wear one of those overdone cliché sashes. This dress is cute, stylish, and subtly sexy. Like, if you weren’t acting like a drunk slob kabob, people might actually think you just got back from a classy brunch or something. When like, in reality, you’ve actually been on a weekend bender of cheap bottomless mimosas. Like, who knew???

3. Tailored Romper

Lavish Alice Tailored Wrapover Romper, $61

This is the ideal outfit for the last night of your bachelorette weekend when the booze-induced bloating starts to rear its ugly head. The romper itself is polished and classy, and the wrap aspect will hide your bloat from all the rosé you’ve been drinking. It’s also so stylish and chic on its own that it requires minimal styling effort on your part. And, given how insanely hungover you’ll probs be at this point in the weekend, you’ll be extremely grateful to have it. Just throw on some heels and a statement earring, and pull your hair back in a sleek low pony and you’ll instantly look Stassi Schroeder-adjacent.

4. Matching Set

Nasty Gal Settle The Score Crop Top And Pants Set, $60

An all-white matching set is a great alternative to having to wear a dress all weekend. First off, you’ll actually be able to dance in it, so you could even do some Kyle Richards’ signature splits on the dance floor. Ya know, without worrying about your underwear hanging out. Not to mention, this set is adorbs for not only hitting “da club” but also for those aforementioned boozy brunches. The crop top and high-waisted pants combo highlights everyone’s tiniest part, so you’re guaranteed to look hot…even if you do decide to opt for the french toast once your inhibitions are gone from all those mimosas. I mean, you haven’t had carbs in weeks, I don’t blame you!

5. Classic White Dress

superdown Vika Deep V Dress, $68

 I’m deciding right here and now to make CWD a thing, just like LBD is a thing. Anyway, this silhouette is cute and a little sexy without being over-the-top (like those brides on Say Yes To The Dress who get see-through corset dresses). And the best part is, this dress doesn’t scream “brunch” or “club” or “Nashville” or any particular place or occasion, necessarily—you can wear it pretty much anywhere and still fit in. Which means, unlike the hideous bridesmaid dresses you likely chose, you might actually be able to wear this again, without even having to shorten it!

Honestly, these bride-to-be ~lewks~ are so affordable that you might as well just purchase them all and your bachelorette weekend wardrobe will be all set. And, considering you will probably get cranberry vodka spilled all over them, it’s nice to know that they were inexpensive as they spend the rest of their days hanging in your closet.

Images: Zoriana Stakhniv / Unsplash; Revolve (3); Asos; NastyGal
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