Who says steamy romance is just for the summer? This week, with Venus in fiery Leo and Mars linking up with its celestial partner in Aries, you can expect things to get hot. And don’t think it’s just limited to romance: this powerful trine has the ability to ignite just about every aspect of your life. Just so long as you don’t let all the attention go to your head.

Aries

You’ve never been afraid to speak your mind, Aries, so no need to start now. With Venus and Mars working together, now is the time for you to let someone special know how you really feel. That way you can finally get to the fun part of the relationship (aka them coming over and logging you in on all their parents’ fancy TV channels).

Taurus

Coupled-up bulls might feel the urge to change up the routine this week. Sure, you and your beloved have been spending every waking moment together, but how much of that is real quality time? Plan something nice to do together that’s not walking to the same little park you’ve been walking to every single day.

Gemini

Time to get your flirt on, Gemini! This week Venus and Mars are coming together to tell you to go for it. Send that risky text. Slide into that person’s DMs. And post your thirst traps with abandon. You can always delete the evidence at a later time.

Cancer

This week will bring some major clarity, in a good way, to one of your relationships. If things have seemed murky and you can’t quite remember what it is you like about this person, by the end of the week you should remember exactly what it is. (And yes, it’s okay if the answer is abs.)

Leo

With Venus in your sign and Mars in fellow fire sign Aries, you’re going to be what we in the biz call “a little extra” this week. You’re ordering Postmates with abandon. You’re wearing your most glam looks (even with nowhere to go), and you are absolutely going off in the group chat. Sorry to anyone who can’t handle it.

Virgo

The creative energy is flowing thanks to Venus and Mars this week, so what are you gonna do about it? If you’ve been feeling stuck in an aspect of your life, don’t be surprised if you find a burst of inspiration this week. You’ll be living your Carrie Bradshaw dreams in no time.

Libra

An old flame might try to pop back into your life this week, Libra. Mars in retrograde means that someone from your past could decide to attempt a repeat appearance, should you let them. Will you give in to temptation? Maybe. Will you text every detail to the group chat as it happens? Absolutely.

Scorpio

Cut your partner some slack this week, Scorpio, as Mars may have you itching for a fight. Yes, the way they texted “k” instead of “k!” was objectively rude, but as a wise woman once said, “Kim, there are people who are dying.” Spare yourself the drama.

Sagittarius

Time to put your money where your mouth is when it comes to your relationships, Sagittarius. Have you been being the best partner/friend/child/sibling/coworker you can be? Chances are, there’s someone in your life you’ve been slacking on. Pay them a little extra attention this week before you end up the next entry in their burn book.

Capricorn

This week you may be feeling the urge to get closer to someone in your life, with Venus and Mars pushing you toward close-knit domestic feelings. Just make sure you don’t try to manufacture the closeness with someone who doesn’t deserve to see you at your wifey-est. That’s for VIPs only.

Aquarius

This week has you looking on the bright side of life, Aquarius, no matter what the news and/or your sh*tty ex throws your way. You’re feeling good, and nobody can bring you down. In fact, you’re actually feeling *good* about the future of things. And they said in 2020 it couldn’t be done…

Pisces

A truth you’ve been trying to outrun will finally catch up with you this week, Pisces. Don’t let yourself compromise your core values just to avoid an awkward situation. Momentary awkwardness is better than actually agreeing to do another virtual escape room with your college dorm mates.

Images: Giphy (12)

Holy sh*t, it’s September, or, in quarantine-speak, March 398749836th. If you haven’t been paying attention to the news or have successfully sequestered yourself so much that you legit don’t know what day it is, COVID-19 is still rampant, America is still racist af, Europe is handling literally everything better, and there’s an election for the very soul of our nation in about two months.

Maybe the stars can help guide us? I mean, it is Labor Day weekend, the unofficial start of fall and Basic Bitch Season. It’s the least they can do.

Virgo

Kick the unofficial end of summer off right with some r&r. Mercury is saying BYE BITCH to Virgo on Saturday, so you may feel extra moody, but we recommend sleeping through it and doing some of your fav activities to make yourself feel better. Sunday is perf for a tiny hike or stroll near the water, so make sure to schedule some time for that. What else are you doing?

Libra

It’s all about you this weekend, Libra. Lean into all things communication and being a part of the world by enjoying the outdoors with a friend or two plus your S.O. Nature may help you say things you have on your mind but haven’t found a good way to express in awhile. Like, how your friend not sending you memes during the workday is hurting your friendship, or how your S.O. pretends he doesn’t know where the Tupperware goes when he empties the dishwasher and it’s getting old.

Scorpio

Pay attention to your health this weekend, Scorpio. You’ve been kinda neglecting it since quarantine started, which we respect. But, maybe it’s time to go ahead and head outdoors for a walk, or to have a lunch that doesn’t consist purely of Cheetos (even if you mix it up with a few varieties of Cheeto). The time spent exercising or not eating garbage will also give you clarity on your career on Saturday night and into Sunday. Figure out if you’re like, actually happy. If not, it may be time to start exploring a change.

Sagittarius

It’s uh, not gonna be a chill weekend on the romantic front, Sagittarius. Expect any arguments that were simmering below the surface to come to a head on Saturday. It honestly may be a good thing, considering you’ve wanted to get some sh*t off your chest for awhile now. Sunday will offer a bit of calm, so focus on yourself, what makes you happy, and THEN you can think about how other people may be affected. It’s called being an adult, duh.

Capricorn

Move forward calmly this weekend, Capricorn. Saturday is perfect for snuggling in at home, tackling a short and easy project (i.e. not trying to redo plumbing, hang shiplap, or read work emails) like finishing a book, trying a new cooking technique (are we still baking banana bread, guys?), or finally washing the sheets on your bed (ew). Use Sunday to tackle a more work-oriented endeavor, even if it’s a project your boss hasn’t officially asked for yet.

Aquarius

It’s all about relationships this weekend, Aquarius. Whether you haven’t talked to your dad in a while, or need to meet up with a sibling for brunch, or just need to sleep in Saturday with your S.O., use Saturday to focus on the most important people in your life. Even though being selfish is kinda fun, this weekend needs to be dedicated to the people who help keep you on track. So, no, it isn’t a good weekend to book your five-hour hair coloring appointment. Your roots aren’t that bad yet; it can wait.

Pisces

Use your voice this weekend, Pisces. With all the easily accessible activism going on in the world, it’s a great opportunity to use your power for a great cause. Go out to a protest, volunteer at a non-profit that could use the help right now, or find organizations registering people to vote and get them up to speed.

Aries

Try not to be so impulsive this weekend, Aries. The planets are aligning on Friday night and Saturday to make sh*t like blowing money online, doing non-social distanced activities, and saying things you shouldn’t top of mind. Ignore the urge and think through your actions. By Saturday night and Sunday, you’ll feel more centered and able to actually think through that $400 silk dress purchase you were about to confirm. Spoiler alert: it was never a good idea and it won’t work on you anyway.

Taurus

It’s cool if you feel like your head’s about to explode this weekend, Taurus. It’s totally just the planets f*cking with you. Doing something creative may take the pressure off a bit, so throw yourself into something artsy, like rearranging flowers or making a picture with glitter and dried macaroni. Get ready Sunday to feel antsy. We suggest moving furniture around to freshen things up… or just to piss yourself off when you have to move it all back.

Gemini

Meet up with some friends to liven up the long weekend, Gemini. Book a brewery patio and catch up on drinking too much, gossip, and eating crappy fried food. It’s the only way to pay tribute to the unofficial end of summer and to guarantee your jeans won’t fit you at the end of the day. Being outdoors in general will boost your mood on Sunday, too, so keep things on point with a morning jog… or just have a mimosa on your balcony.

Cancer

The planets may have you feeling all doom and gloom this weekend, Cancer. Don’t give in to that sh*t. Instead, boost your confidence and mood by tackling a project you know you can accomplish, like making your favorite dinner from scratch, answering two work emails without being an asshole, or not chugging an entire bottle of wine in one sitting.

Leo

Get ready to feeeeel yourself, Leo. This weekend, the planets and stars will align to help you see how hot, smart, and accomplished you are. You’ll be feeling confident af all weekend. Use your good mood on Saturday to do something you love with someone you love. Head out on a short road trip somewhere beautiful for a picnic or some sexy time outdoors. Sunday is for sleeping in, cancelling plans, and sitting in a bathtub with wine for longer than you should.

Images: Giphy (12)

Welcome to the Thunderdome quarantine, week two, where the rules are made up and nothing matters. If nothing else, this social isolation is really making me question the amount of loungewear I own. I always thought it was too much, but who’s laughing now? I came prepared for this sh*t.

Speaking of prepared, it’s time to check your weekend horoscope, so you can find out what kind of fun adventures the planets have in store for us this week. Will quarantine be extended into June? Will you find your soulmate from the safety of your couch? Will Mark ever come out and say that Jessica was pretending to love him the whole time? Here we go.

Aries

Time to get some sh*t in order, Aries. Friday is a great time to wake up before noon and examine how much you spent “supporting” local restaurants with takeout this week. I see your flex, and it’s fine, but you also shouldn’t eat into your savings (or that third pizza of the week) in the name of saving the hospitality industry. Now is the perfect time to make a budget and stick to it, no matter how much cooking for yourself sucks. Saturday and Sunday are also prime opportunities to make a pros and cons list regarding your professional career and examine whether you’re really happy or just checking boxes.

Taurus

Get ready for the waterworks, Taurus, because this weekend is about to get f*cking emotional. If you weren’t already feeling anxious thanks to the global pandemic, on Saturday the moon is going to have you feeling extra empathetic, so you’re more likely to break down after hearing about the sad state of affairs in the world right now. Bummer, bro.

Gemini

Get ready for some weird dreams this weekend, Gemini, which should help pass the time while you aren’t staring out a window, drinking, or binge-watching Netflix. We recommend a lot of napping on Saturday and then writing in your dream journal after chugging your quarantini. These are the end times, lol.

Cancer

The moon wants you to socialize with friends this weekend, Cancer. Since the government had to put a stop to all that gallivanting around, we recommend a group FaceTime on Friday where you all see how many episodes of Tiger King you can watch together before someone blacks out. Saturday is for cleaning your apartment, which is super necessary now that you’re there all the f*cking time. Take it easy on Sunday by sleeping late, making yourself a huge pancake breakfast, then taking another nap.

Leo

The moon in Taurus wants you to take care of some outstanding tasks, Leo. Go ahead and clean out that junk drawer, finish painting that wall, or finally write those thank-you notes. Saturday presents a chance for a domestic blowup between you and your SO (probably over the fact that he’s worn the same sweatpants for six days straight and they smell awful), but try to keep a cool head and approach the confrontation with logic. Sunday you’ll crave some friendship time, so steal your boyfriend’s XBox and make all your friends play Call of Duty with you.

Virgo

The planets want you to experience adventure this weekend, Virgo, so I guess it’s time to try a new walking route with your dog in the company of absolutely zero additional people. Social distancing for the win, amirite? You’re going to feel extra creative, too, so it’s actually a great time to paint, draw, or write a sad poem about the #Quarantimes on Instagram. Sunday is for feeling anxious, but push that sh*t off by rewatching Spongebob on Amazon Prime… or whatever helps you cope.

Libra

Time to get sexy and weird, Libra. Honestly, if you’re experiencing quarantine with your SO, this weekend is a great opportunity to stay in bed and try all the weird sh*t you’ve always been to nervous to do. Anal? Handcuffs? Toys you can’t pronounce the name of? All that and more should be on your to-do list. Sunday you need to order some takeout and have some fun, so we recommend a game of hide-and-seek with your cat.

Scorpio

Feel the love this weekend, Scorpio. If you’re in a committed relationship, Friday is a great chance to wine and dine (at home) with your SO while wearing loungewear and talking about some deep sh*t. Take things a step further on Saturday and play naked Twister, or just try to get through a Netflix marathon without arguing. Sunday is for snuggles, per usual. If you’re single and none of this applies, pour yourself another glass of wine and get matching.

Sagittarius

Take care of YOU this weekend, Sagittarius. Honestly, we’re all a little freaked out and anxious, so if you find yourself needing some extra space and time this weekend, it’s fine. Take a long bath. Cook or bake something complicated to take your mind off everything bad that’s going on, or just completely unplug and stop watching the news. On Sunday you can rejoin the world, spend some (Face)time with your loved ones, and try to get yourself in a more positive headspace.

Capricorn

The moon wants you to broaden your horizons, Capricorn, so it’s a stellar time to take an online class. Whether you decide to pay top dollar for Master Class or just sit in on your little cousin’s fourth grade algebra, the time is now (and this weekend) to learn some skills. Sunday is all about self-care, so tell yourself that yes, it is okay to eat a sleeve of Oreos if it’ll help you cope.

Aquarius

You know what would be totally fun for you this weekend, Aquarius? A dinner party! Too bad COVID-19 has ruined literally everything. You can try to get around it on Friday night by hosting a virtual potluck with your friends via FaceTime and forcing everyone to eat their takeout on camera. After that embarrassment, use Saturday to vacuum, clean baseboards, and try to distract yourself from the current state of, well, everything.

Pisces

The universe says it’s a great time to go on a trip out of town, but we say absolutely not. Maybe plan a wine tour around your house/apartment, or explore the new environment of your yard. Sorry, but we all have to do our part to flatten the curve. Sunday will be all about focusing on home and family, so call your mom, make sure she isn’t leaving the house, then dust everything in your room in her honor.

Images: bruce mars / Unsplash; Giphy (12)

Our first week of serious social distancing is coming to a close, and I assume most of you have already eaten all of your pantry supplies and have moved on to rationing toilet paper in your homes. You’ll be okay, just don’t post anything problematic on social media. These are the times we live in, and with the Boomer Remover flu in full swing, it’s a great time to look to the stars and planets for wtf is going on.

Pisces

You’re obviously sleeping later these days because working from home is a big vibe rn, Pisces. The good news is that your dreams are a great insight into, like, life, so try and pay attention to them. The moon and Neptune are going to push your creativity and emotions to the surface on Saturday, so prepare to cry while watching Bob Ross paint happy little clouds. Sunday is all about relaxing, so be sure to practice some social isolation and sleep all day.

Aries

It’s all about friendship this weekend, Aries, which is kind of sad considering none of us are allowed to leave the house. Look at it as an opportunity to do a group FaceTime with your besties and all watch Love Is Blind: The Reunion together. I’m sure it’s a trainwreck. Saturday and Sunday are best for quiet nature time, which, last I checked, is still cool during the quarantine times.

Taurus

The moon wants you to take a pulse on your job and coworkers this weekend, Taurus, which is hilarious considering you’re all on day five of sweatpants and pretending to do that project your boss wanted last week. You’re going to want to see your friends on Saturday and Sunday, so maybe draw a picture of your besties with some glitter and macaroni to keep yourself company.

Gemini

It’s a great weekend to write something, pick up your guitar that you forgot how to play, or carve a sculpture out of empty toilet paper rolls, Gemini. After signing off of your last video conference on Friday, indulge in your creative side and pick up something artistic. It’ll serve as a great distraction while the president gives another update on the apocalypse.

Cancer

It’s all about intimacy and romance this weekend, Cancer, which works out, since you’re stuck inside with your SO. Sure, you may be getting sick of seeing each other in bathrobes and loungewear, so treat Friday as an opportunity to order take out, wear your nice lounge pants, and get weird after hours. On Saturday, take a walk together while staying away from other human beings.

Leo

Time to have some real talk, Leo. Since you’re trapped inside, it’s a great chance to sit your SO down and talk about all the things you normally try to ignore. The moon in Pisces is making your whole mindset focus on connection, so this isn’t just going to be a “discussion” about leaving dirty dishes in the sink. If you’re single, send some thought-out and thoughtful messages on your dating app of choice. Maybe you can connect with someone over your mutual love of COVID-19 memes.

Virgo

Check in on yourself, Virgo. This whole global pandemic thing has hit you hard, and it’s important to practice some self-care even if you have been taking it easy the last four days. Order some takeout to support a local business, draw a hot bath, and pour yourself a nice glass of wine. Heck, break out that clay face mask you’ve been too afraid to try. Sunday is for mental self-care, so call your mom and tell her to remind you how amazing you are.

Libra

Apparently, the planets want you to have fun this weekend, Libra. That seems ironically cruel, but we’ll go with it. Maybe fun for you this weekend looks like a Schitt’s Creek-athon with one to two other friends (no groups larger than nine, fam) or a romp in the bedroom solo using that weird vibrator you’ve been too nervous to try. Whatever you do, lean in to the fun aspect to try and forget the craziness going on around you. Kisses.

Scorpio

Spend a night in with your immediate family, if it’s possible (see: allowed). Getting some face time with your parents, siblings, and SO will boost your spirits – something we can all use after this f*cking insane week. Consider a mini dinner party with takeout or an easy meal for a few people. Saturday is for cleaning up and tidying your apartment, which you’ve conveniently put off even while being home all week.

Sagittarius

You’re wanting that deeeeep connection, Sagittarius, and what better weekend to seek it out than one in which you’re trapped inside? The stars and planets are pushing for a romantic getaway, but we’d suggest snuggling up with bae and watching reruns of Parts Unknown. It’s like you’re there, guys!

Capricorn

It’s a good weekend to examine your finances, Capricorn, which feels like a trap considering that I don’t even know what a 401k is, but I know I lost about half of it within the last two weeks. Anyway, since you’re sequestered in your apartment, why not get your tax sh*t together and do that? Being an adult sucks. After you spend a day crying over numbers, relax and watch someone mindless as a reward. We recommend reruns of Spongebob.

Aquarius

It’s okay to be anxious and need some time alone, Aquarius. In these scary times, make sure you’re taking time for yourself a la powering off your phone, not watching the news, and just spending quiet moments with someone that doesn’t totally piss you off. Baths with fragrances are fine, baths wine and a sleeve of Oreos are better.

Images: Giphy (12)

Spring forward, kids. We’re all super excited to lose an hour of sleep and life this weekend, so get ready to embrace the shortest weekend ever. Whether the planets want you to focus on your relationship (see: trying not to complain about his inability to empty the dishwasher), enjoy the outdoors (ugh), or re-examine your career (someone pay me to do nothing), there’s no time like the present for jumping on this sh*t.

Pisces

Commit to taking better care of yourself starting this weekend, Pisces. That could mean letting yourself have the pizza once in awhile, going to that f*cking hot spin class, or just making sure you wash your hair every three days. On Sunday, the moon is highlighting all things romance, so if you’re wifed up, head out for drinks and something sweet, like a brownie sundae at Applebee’s. If you’re single, set aside an hour for swiping through Ship with a glass of wine in hand.

Aries

Time to get creative, Aries. Take one of those wine and painting classes with your girlfriends, or just break into that ceramics class at the art center up the block. Even if your artistic abilities are around the third grade level, just have some f*cking fun. Sunday you may feel pulled between your own creative pursuits and the needs of someone else (like your SO and his inability to meal prep for himself), but it’s okay to try and split time between the two.

Taurus

Be a domestic goddess, Taurus. Spend the weekend doing all the nest sh*t that you normally put off, like Windexing the bathroom mirrors and steam cleaning your kitchen floor. Once that’s all spick and span, have some friends over for a fancy dinner party. Or, like, just order pizza and point out to the delivery guy that you cleaned and require validation.

Gemini

It’s a great time to learn some sh*t, Gemini. Sign up for an online course in anthropology, or, if that’s a total waste of time, try to pick up those Duolingo French lessons again, mon petit cochon. It’s also a great time to get creative with your side hustles, so don’t be afraid to pick back up your Tumblr. I’m sure everyone is stoked to read it again.

Cancer

Look at your finances, Cancer. Maybe avoid checking your 401(k) or stock options, since the Coronavirus has that sh*t on a steady decline. Instead, review your savings and credit cards and make sure you’re saving and not putting yourself in a debt hole. If you’re being responsible, feel free to book a spa appointment for Sunday. You earned it, champ.

Leo

Time to soak up your own awesomeness, Leo. Whether it means getting together with your most positive, complimentary friends, communing with nature, or calling your mom and asking her to remind you how great she thinks you are, this weekend is all about recognizing that you’re, like, really swell. Spend Saturday celebrating with sweatpants and Taco Bell. Sunday is for online shopping and hitting “buy” on that totally frivolous purchase you’ve been putting off.

Virgo

Do nothing, Virgo. Seriously, some weekends are best for staying in, ordering Postmates, perusing celebrity Instas, and not putting on makeup. This is one of those times. After all that r&r on Saturday, it’s totally fine to head out with your SO on Sunday for a much-needed date night. If you’re single, call a sibling and catch up or take your mom out to dinner. She loves to hang out with you.

Libra

Friday and Saturday will be all about socializing, Libra, and you def need it after the week you’ve had. Grab drinks and catch up on gossip with your besties at a new spot in town. You may run into someone interesting, too. Come Sunday, the moon in Virgo will be pushing you to leave everyone on read while you re-calibrate and prepare for the week ahead.

Scorpio

It’s a good time to think about your work-life balance, or lack thereof, Scorpio. Do some sittin’ and thinkin’ about how happy your 9 to 5 actually makes you when you come home on Friday. If all signs point to “not f*cking happy”, spend Saturday finessing your resume and sending it around to some new options. On Sunday, you’ll want to socialize, so meet up with friends and talk through the whole job and career debacle. You may be surprised what they have to say.

Sagittarius

Get out of your comfort zone this weekend, Sagittarius. You don’t have to sign up for skydiving or agree to an orgy with your SO; it can be as simple as forcing yourself to go to that abstract art gallery with your bestie who’s into that sh*t. On Sunday, check your work email early or start on that project you know your boss is going to ask about. Having a leg up will actually help you out this week.

Capricorn

It’s all about connecting on a sexy level this weekend, Capricorn. If you have a partner, spend Friday night getting to know them on a truly intimate level. You don’t have to break out any whips or butt plugs, unless you’re into that—just try to communicate without giggling when it comes to their wants. If you aren’t paired up, don’t be afraid to put yourself out there. Go on that date or say hi to that weirdo across the bar. It may end up better than you think.

Aquarius

Time for a weekend getaway with your partner or a best friend, Aquarius. Self-care is awesome, but this is a great weekend to put someone else first and try to enjoy the things they enjoy. So, if that means watching college baseball or hiking or pretending to understand the stock market, f*cking suck it up this weekend. Sunday provides a great opportunity to grow your relationship and take it to the next level, so try not to be a d*ck.

Images: Giphy (12)

Happy Leap Year, bitches! Once every four years, we get to experience the true magic of February 29th, and this year the planets and stars are totally determined to see you have a good f*cking time.

Whether you’re going to seriously sit down and do your taxes like an adult, blow $500 on a “me” day complete with a spa package, pedicure, bottomless mimosa brunch, and hours’ worth of regret later, or just sit at home and watch all seven seasons of The Great British Baking Show, tis the weekend to listen to the universe and make the most of your days off.

Pisces

Explore the world around you, Pisces. It’s a great weekend to head out on your own and give some things a good, hard think. Is there someone in your life that’s majorly f*cking with your self-esteem or “me” time? Your boss doesn’t count. Mercury retrograde will actually help you see clearly as to which friends and family members are helping you grow and which are holding you back, so dedicate some mind space to that mess this weekend.

Aries

The moon wants you to spend all your money, Aries. That may seem kind of hilarious, but if you don’t want to blackout and spend your life savings on a “f*ck it, let’s just go” moment and book an all-expenses-paid vacay to Fiji, we suggest only bringing one credit card out with you Friday night. Saturday, you’ll need to fight the urge to shop online for sh*t you don’t need, which will be especially difficult since you’ll be extra sensitive and looking for some retail therapy.

Taurus

The moon in your sign means this is a weekend dedicated to YOU, Taurus. Grab your betches on Friday night and drink all the drinks that you thought you couldn’t anymore. Spend Saturday picking up the pieces and reminiscing about how you all used to be, like, really cool. Sunday is perfect for trying something a bit outside your comfort zone, so download Bumble and send a bunch of oddly poetic messages to see who bites. I mean, it can’t hurt.

Gemini

You’re going to be caught up in your own head all weekend, Gemini. It isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but know that after work on Friday, the best way to unwind will be to pop open a bottle of rosé and write about your feelings in your Notes app. Saturday is a great time to try out that yoga class you’ve been putting off, since meditation will actually help put your mind at ease.

Cancer

The moon is highlighting your friends in their time of need this weekend, Cancer, so, unfortunately, you won’t have much time for yourself. Focus on lifting the spirits of a bestie who’s having a hard time and try to get her out of her funk with an interesting dinner, hike, or lazy Saturday lounging and watching Disney+. Sunday, after that’s dealt with, you may want to turn attention to your own romantic relationships, which have been feeling a bit ignored lately.

Leo

Listen to your gut this weekend, Leo, especially as it relates to your career. If you’ve been feeling like work is sucking the life out of you more than normal, use Saturday to peruse the job boards and update your resume. It doesn’t need to be pink and scented to get attention, but it also probs won’t hurt.

Virgo

Our favorite planet to make fun of, Uranus, is peer pressuring you to go outside your comfort zone this weekend, Virgo. It’s a great opportunity to try something new with your partner, like communicating how you actually feel; or just going to a new restaurant. If you’re single, the planets are aligning in such a way as to spark meaningful relationships, so don’t shut yourself inside all weekend.

Libra

It’s all about intimacy this weekend, Libra. If you aren’t paired up, the potential for a long-lost love making contact is high this weekend. Whether that’s via drunk text or heartfelt letter, we can’t say, but be open to it so long as he wasn’t a giant douche the first time around. If you are paired up, focus on self-care with your partner. A trip to a day spa or a quiet afternoon hike and picnic are a great way to relax and unwind before Monday ruins everything again.

Scorpio

Time to fight it out, Scorpio. Unfortunately, this weekend will bring to light all the little bullsh*t issues you’ve had with your besties, your mom, and your SO. The planets want you to be upfront on Saturday and talk through all that sh*t. It’ll be difficult, but maybe you can all celebrate with alcohol afterwards. Sunday, you can slink away and entertain yourself with arts and crafts or that DIY project you’ve been putting off.

Sagittarius

It’s all about home, Sagittarius. After work on Friday, come home and put away the pile of clothes on “the chair” in your room. Vacuum your bathroom and dust a bookshelf, too, to round out the cleaning extravaganza. On Saturday, there may be a weird development with a family member, but try to just go with the flow and relax. So what if your mom wants to come to stay with you for a week? I’m sure it’ll be fine.

Capricorn

Take a risk this weekend, Capricorn. Grab a friend and try something new on Friday night, like not making regrettable decisions because of the drinks you chugged! After brunch on Saturday, take some time to focus on things you’ve wanted to do but haven’t had time for, like meal planning or reading a book.

Aquarius

The moon in Taurus is highlighting crazy developments in the home sector this weekend, Aquarius. While that probably doesn’t mean you’re magically pregnant or going to win the lottery, there may be some drama around the corner with a close friend or loved one. Crazy sh*t aside, use Saturday to get your taxes together so you can actually be early this year. This is what adulthood feels like.

Images: Giphy (12)

Valentine’s Day is over, winter is on its way out, and spring is on the horizon. It’s almost time for us all to collectively freak out about our summer bodies, frequent the gym for a few weeks, then give up and accept ourselves for the way we are, while shrieking “any body in a bikini is a bikini body!” Ah, the circle of life. All that sh*t aside, the stars and planets are pushing all of us to bask in our self-confidence and share the happy vibes, so hopefully your weekend will be full of mimosas and sexy times instead of stained sweats and leftover takeout. Read on to see what the stars have in store for you.

Pisces

Alone time is the name of the game this weekend, Pisces. Turn inward and do some meditation or jot down your feelings in a journal as soon as you get off work Friday and all day Saturday. By Sunday, the new moon will have you feeling fresh af and you’ll be ready to join the waking world once more. Meet up with friends for an afternoon alcoholic bev to take the edge off the Sunday scaries.

Aries

Head out to dinner with your besties on Friday night, Aries. After this week, a little bit of time to unwind over deep fried sticks of cheese is exactly what you need. Sh*t, if you’re really feeling it, have an adults-only sleepover with your besties into Saturday. Wake up, drink all the mimosas, and just relax with the betches that get you. Sunday will bring a need for you time, so get all the fun out before then.

Taurus

You got your mind on your money this weekend, Taurus. Or, rather, on your career and its ability to support your lifestyle. Do some tough thinking this weekend about your job and whether it’s the right choice for you in the long run. Come Sunday, you’ll be craving one-on-one time with someone who really gets you, be it a best friend or your SO, so be sure and make time for something other than delivery and Netflix.

Gemini

Time to try something new, Gemini. Use this weekend to get out and explore your own backyard (not like, literally) and visit some restaurants, galleries, hiking trails—whatever—within 30 minutes of your abode. It’ll do you good to familiarize yourself with what’s directly around you instead of venturing far out for everything all the time. Sunday, you’ll want to stick close to home and get a head start on work emails before Monday. It’s going to be a sh*tty week, LOL.

Cancer

Time to buckle up and get ready for tax season, Cancer. It’s a great weekend to review the trust fund you wish you had, your v sad checking account, and the credit card debt you racked up when you were abroad. Spend Saturday covered in your W2s and receipts so that Sunday can be a time of alcohol and magic!

Leo

It’s all about partnership this weekend, Leo. The stars and planets want you to forge (or strengthen) genuine connections between you and your SO or you and a new mate on Friday and Saturday night, so plan to get out and have actual conversations with other human beings. It isn’t all for nothing, either, since Sunday you’ll be feeling sassy and ready to sleep in with your partner—trying out weird sex positions. Good for you, sweetie.

Virgo

It’s all about what makes you happy this weekend, Virgo. Spend Friday night and Saturday making pro and con lists about the things in life that you love versus what you want to see change. If your SO isn’t on the con side, spend Sunday letting them know how much you love and appreciate them, what they do that makes you happy, and how when they leave you the last piece of pizza it makes you love them a little more.

Libra

Get creative with how you spend your weekend, Libra. Instead of the usual brunch and binge-watching, try to get out and do something different. Whether it’s a picnic in the freezing February weather, embarrassing yourself on a hike, or making time to visit your in-laws without having a panic attack, you need to go outside your comfort zone. Sunday will be all about self-care and you time, so you have that to look forward to.

Scorpio

Clean your f*cking house, Scorpio. Spending time dusting and vacuuming may seem like a horrible way to spend a Saturday, but you can do it while soaking up time with your SO or immediate family, too. Plus, you’ll feel more able to indulge in some creative pursuits come Sunday if there aren’t clothes, laundry, and dirty dishes everywhere.

Sagittarius

It’s a great weekend to take that pottery class you’ve been too nervous to get involved with, Sagittarius. The stars are aligning to highlight the most creative-leaning parts of you, so getting involved in something artsy fartsy will bode well this Saturday. By Sunday, you’ll be itching to take care of some home clean up, so don’t feel weird about canceling plans so you can reorganize your bathroom drawers.

Capricorn

You’ll be hyper-focused on stuff this weekend, Capricorn, meaning your material possessions, of which, yeah, you have a lot. Spend Saturday de-cluttering and organizing into piles of consign, donate, and omg-please-trash. Getting rid of those jeans that haven’t fit you for roughly six years is hard but necessary. By Sunday, you’ll feel emotionally lighter and should reward yourself with some boozy cocktails.

Aquarius

Spread the love this weekend, Aquarius, and by that we mean share your good vibes—don’t like, go home with a diff stranger every night. Or do, we’re not judging. Reach out to that friend that always feels a little down on her luck and is kind of a drag. Your attitude will make her feel lighter and happier. Sunday you can save all the good vibes for yourself, though, and indulge in some Taco Bell and Bachelor reruns.

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