If you’re anything like me, you probably think of sex toys as something to be used in the privacy of your own home, either alone or with your partner. But that’s beginning to change as high-tech start-ups reconceptualize the way we think about sex toys, especially when these companies are run by women. One notable manifestation of this trend are sex toys that double as wearable accessories. With these, gone are the days where your only option for a vibrator was a veiny phallus molded from the dong of a washed-up porn star (though if that’s your thing, do you). Read on for a list of sex toys you can take with you anywhere.
1. Secrets 5 Function Remote Control Vibrating Black Lace Thong
While it may look like your typical lace thong, this baby has a hidden pocket that fits a mini vibrator. What’s more, it’s also remote control operable up to a range of 10 meters, so you can cede control to someone else if that’s your kink. According to the product description, “you won’t have to choose between turning up to work or climaxing, popping to the post office or climaxing, or going to a wedding or climaxing.” The wedding example is a bit of a weird flex, but these undies could come in handy for one of those work meetings that could have been an email.
2. Amelia Nipple Clamp Chandelier Earrings
These earrings are not necessarily for the faint of nip heart. Though they may look like your typical architectural jewelry, they’re modeled after the alligator nipple clamp, a staple in the BDSM world. The great thing about clamps is that they can be adjusted to suit your tolerance, whether it’s a simple desire to increase sensation or to heighten pleasure with some pain. Considering that the nipples are a major erogenous zone for many people, these earrings are a creative option that will both get you off and completely fool your more vanilla co-workers.
3. Crave Vesper Vibrator Necklace
If you’re toying (see what I did there?) with the idea of purchasing a wearable sex toy, this is the one I would start with. The Vesper necklace is perhaps the most well-known and popular wearable sex toy on this list, and it’s easy to see why. Its sleek design and three power settings make it both a beautiful piece of jewelry and a powerful vibrator. And there’s just something indulgent about wearing a literal vibrator out in the open: as one reviewer put it, “It’s like wearing a secret around my neck and in public!”
4. Cleo Bangle Handcuffs
If the nipple clamps weren’t for you but you’re game for some light BDSM, these bangles are a great option. They’re dainty, yellow gold and engraved, making for a beautiful pair of bracelets on their own. But after a long day of enduring passive-aggressive emails from Karen in Accounting, you can meet up with your partner outside of the office (or in the office if you’re having an affair with a coworker, I don’t know your life) and use these “surprisingly strong” handcuffs for a little bit of fun.
5. Palma Vibrator Ring
Rounding out the list is a ring with 5-star reviews that doubles as a vibrator. What appears on the surface as a chic cocktail ring is actually a multispeed waterproof vibrator with customizable modes that let you control the vibrations with your own hand movements. Although it may seem small, reviewers agree that this sucker “packs a punch.” I guess my ex was right and size doesn’t really matter after all.
The growing prominence of wearable sex toys on the market is exciting. By allowing people, especially women, to literally wear their sexuality on their sleeve (or neck, or ear, or finger), wearable sex toys subverts the societal notion that sex is something shameful that needs to be kept hidden. That’s a vibe (OK, I’ll stop) that we can all get into.
Images: Marvin Meyer / Unsplash; Giphy (1)
Contrary to popular belief (primarily held by insecure men), sex toys aren’t designed to be anybody’s competition. In fact, it’s quite the opposite—they’re great for solo play, spicing things up with your partner, AND boosting your chances of cumming with them. What?! Yup. Sex toys are for EVERYONE, especially couples. They’re basically little angels that have cum down from the heavens in all shapes and sizes to bless us with powerful orgasms. Because I’m an angel in my own way, I’ve compiled a list of the best sex toys to use with your partner, including vibrators, wearables, plugs, restraints, and fun accessories too.
Sweet Vibrations tuLips
Sweet Vibrations’ tuLips is a clitoral vibrator that’s cleverly named after the mystical, magical clitoris. Whereas a lot of clit vibes stimulate just the tip, the tuLips is designed to stimulate the ENTIRE clitoris that’s hiding beneath the surface and wants just as much love. This cute and colorful vibrator is small and quiet, but it’s actually a beast with 10 settings and five intensities. Vulva owners, you need this—trust me, a fellow vulva owner.
Satisfyer Multifun 2
I’ve been a Satisfyer fan ever since I tried the Power Flower vibrator that personally introduced me to God, and all of their other toys are just as amazing, including this one. The Multifun 2 is perfect for all couples and body parts. Use it on nipples, on a penis, or angled into the G-spot. Did I mention you can create up to 100 sensation combinations with this bad boy? Yeah… the Multifun is, like, soOo fun!
Satisfyer’s Ring supports hard dicks and pleased clits. All you gotta do is stretch it over a penis or dildo and vibe until you O. If you’d rather use this ring as a hand-held vibrator, you can do that too. Whatever you’re into. I keep rhyming. Sorry. Long story short, this ring “for men” can be (and should be) used by anyone and everyone.
Wild Flower Enby
The Enby by Wild Flower is a genderless vibrator that looks like a bike seat, except it’s way more pleasurable to sit on. What’s super cool about the Enby is you can use it in so many different ways. Enjoy dry humping? Rub away. Want to use it with a harness? Go ahead. Would you rather fold it and massage your partner with it? Have fun. Wild Flower’s website says it best: “Its flexible shape leaves room for users to pick their own sexual adventure. No matter your identity, Enby has something for you.”
Dame Eva II
Eva is small and powerful as f*ck. It’s a hands-free couples’ vibrator that comfortably tucks between the labia and vibrates the clitoris in three different strengths. Vulva owners can wear it during penetration for added pleasure. When I received mine and turned it on for the first time, the third setting shook my entire hand. It was intense. So was the orgasm. Oh, and Dame Products is suing the MTA for its sexist, unequal ad approvals that favor male ED products and reject companies that cater to women’s sexual wellness, so that’s all the more reason to support Dame and its phenomenal catalogue of toys. #DerailSexism
Club Vibe 3.OH Hero
“The great thing about the butt is that it’s an EOO, an equal opportunity orifice, aka no matter your gender, you can enjoy a bit o’ booty play,” said Babeland’s awesome Brand Manager Lisa Finn. Do we love her? We love her. This slim and powerful remote, app, and sound-controlled anal plug is perfect for teasing and pleasing. And it’s not called “Club Vibe” for nothing. When you turn on Club mode, it picks up nearby sounds (yes, including moans) and turns them into vibrations. How f*cking cool is that?!
Satisfyer Plugs are perfect for beginners interested in anal training. This training kit includes three differently shaped plugs, each with increasing diameters. Satisfyer’s Director of Education Megwyn White says that these can be inserted as a form of foreplay to enhance pleasure or used during penetrative sex to intensify sensations. Remember to lube up your butt plugs, friends! Speaking of lube, this flawlessly brings us to the next two items on the list…
Babeland’s Lisa Finn also told me, “Whenever our staff gets asked what the best product in the store is, we almost always have the same answer: lube! Lube is the best inexpensive sex toy you can own. It makes everything slicker and cuts down on any bad friction for a more comfortable and intimate experience. BabeLube Natural is vegan, cruelty-free, paraben-free, glycerin-free, and is compatible with all kinds of toys, condoms, and barriers.” Enough said. Actually, wait, let me add that the ingredients are also mostly organic, including aloe, hibiscus, flax, and green tea. K, now enough said.
CocoLube is a unisex coconut-based lube made up of coconut-derived oils that smells delicious, is long-lasting, toy-safe, non-toxic, and all that other good stuff. It’s also free of the not-so-good stuff, like parabens, petrochemicals, and preservatives. You can either use it as a massage oil or as a sex lube, or both.
LELO Tiani 2
The Tiani 2 is one of LELO’s best-selling couples toys, and that’s not just because it’s so sleek and sexy. This wearable toy is worn internally by women during sex and controlled with a small remote that can be manually turned up or down or automatically changed via SenseMotion™ technology. What’s SenseMotion™, you ask? Oh, it’s just LELO’s casual technology that’s responsive to you or your partner’s body movements and adjusts the vibration pulsations accordingly. This is some V high-tech stuff, my friends.
When my Crescendo came in the mail, I spent wayyy too much time bending it into wayyy too many shapes. Mystery Vibe’s Crescendo is a flexible vibrator that adapts to you and your partner’s unique bodies and needs (like, it literally bends). Its curvy structure allows you to ride it, insert it, lay on it, or do whatever the f*ck else you want with it. The possibilities are endless. This toy also syncs with an app for fun remote lovin’.
Let’s face it. Handcuffs are all fun and games until someone loses the key then you and your partner have to figure out a way to carefully break them without breaking anyone’s wrists. No? No one else? Okay, anyway… Unbound’s Cuffies are restraints made from strong, body-safe silicone so you can keep the kink without the keys. CEO and co-founder of Unbound Polly Rodriguez says these are great introductory handcuffs. Want to get into BDSM? Getchu some cuffies.
Tracey Cox Supersex Beginner’s Bondage Kit
Not a fan of handcuffs? How about a bondage kit? This one is velvety and sexy and attaches to bed frames or table legs or whatever you want to be tied to (or tie someone else to). I like Lovehoney’s product description more than anything I can cleverly come up with, so here’s what it says: “Whether you want your lover’s body bound and at the mercy of your whims, or you just want their hands tied so they can’t hog the remote, the Tracey Cox Bondage Kit is for you.”
Liberator Heart Wedge
This adorable heart-shaped pillow is equal parts lovely and orgasm-inducing. Sure, it can go incognito and look like a random pillow on your bed, but its strategic incline is designed to promote deeper penetration, easy G and P-spot access, and oral sex without the neck cramps. It’s basically the stealthiest, cutest piece of bedroom decor ever.
This wearable finger vibrator by Unbound looks like a badass ring, but it’s so much more than that. The Palma is so versatile that you can casually wear it out to dinner then use it on your partner during the drive home. You’re basically investing in a multi-functional gold or silver piece of beautiful jewelry.
Last but certainly not least on this list is MysteryVibe’s Tenuto. This vibrator is one of the very first high-quality wearables for people with penises, with motors that strategically stimulate the penis, balls, AND perineum ANDDD the clitoris during PiV sex. The Tenuto is flexible for all body types and can be used as a cock ring, a nipple stimulator, or a personal massager.
So, yeah, to those who believe sex toys are your competition and not your friend, what were you saying? Humor me and try any of these toys and I bet you’ll change your big, fat “NO” into a bigger, louder “OH.”
Also, this article is not sponsored by any of the toy brands mentioned in this article… but if any of these companies want to sponsor me, please slide into my DMs just like you effortlessly slid into my….. heart. K, bye.
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