5 Low-Rise Jeans That Won’t Make You Look Like A ‘Laguna Beach’ Reject

Apparently low-rise jeans are making a comeback, which is the least surprising news ever if you really think about it. Every couple of years, the jean style you swore you’d never wear again sneaks back into your closet, kind of like when you hang out with your ex but you’re definitely not together again. We all promised to ditch low-rise jeans and their horrible short zippers when we discovered the slimming capabilities of super high rise denim, but obviously that trend wasn’t going to last forever. I’m not saying you should get rid of your high-waisted jeans, and I’m definitely not saying you should pull out your old boot cut True Religions with bedazzled butt pockets. I’m just trying to prepare you for a painless transition from one denim trend to the next. Here are a few pairs of low-rise jeans that won’t make you look like a Laguna Beach walk-on that never got a more detailed on-screen name credit than “Brody’s friend.”

1. The Legging Step Hem Ankle Skinny Jeans, AG Jeans

These AG jeans are basically as close to a denim legging as you can get without wearing literal Pajama Jeans. These may be low-rise, but they also have a step hem and a distressed wash, so they’re way more 2017 than 2007.

2. MOTO Winter Bleach Lucas Jeans, Topshop

These are kind of like mom jeans, but they’re low-rise, which helps prevent serious mom butt. They also have a slouchy fit but don’t have holes, so you can pull off a relaxed look without every old dude you see in a day asking how much you paid for jeans with holes in them.

3. Boyfriend Low Ripped Jeans, H&M

On the off chance that you do want every old dude you see in a day to ask how much you paid for jeans with holes in them, this is a pretty good pair. Plus, they’re just from H&M, so if you accidentally rip through the knee hole with your foot, it’s not the total end of the world.

4. Harper Low-Rise Super Skinny Jeans, Abercrombie & Fitch

Before you stop reading and close this article out because I just suggested you buy jeans from Abercrombie, hear me out. Do you still drink the cheap vodka you blacked out off of in college? Yes, of course you do. You just don’t take photos of the bottle anymore. This is kind of the same scenario. A&F finally stopped putting their signature pocket stitching on most of their jeans, so you can still wear their super comfortable, actually affordable denim without rocking an infamous Abercrombie butt.

5. Low-Rise Skinny Fit Jean, Tommy Hilfiger

As long as you don’t wear these with like, a pink polo with a popped collar and oversized fake pearls, you should be fine. Gigi Hadid is desperately trying to make Tommy Hilfiger a thing again, so you might as well join in on that movement.

7 Must-Have Festival Accessories

Attending a music festival at least once in your life is about as mandatory as leaving your motherland at least once. You just have to do it because as a wise Wiz Khalifa once said, we are young, wild, and free. Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if you considered getting that as a tattoo. Drinking in excess, deafening music, and eating overpriced food are a betch’s top three fave things. So, when you put them all together on a remote island in NYC for a Coachella knockoff or in the middle of Chicago, us basic bitches everywhere are going to unite. This means we’re naturally stressing over what the fuck we’re going to wear because festival attire requires a combo of hippie Vanessa Hudgens and chill Kendall Jenner. We’re not showing up looking like rave sluts in pink fishnets and cheap thongs (God, no. Make it stop). Nor are we going to Forever21 and grabbing the most plain high waisted shorts and crop tank. Nailing the boho chic aesthetic requires versatile staples, slightly confusing detailing, and bold accessories that won’t get you accused of cultural appropriation. Whether you’re going to Lollapalooza this weekend or prepping for Outside Lands, here are boho chic essentials for an outfit to make your friends envy your trendy ways.

1. Free People Gia Cream Lace Bodysuit

It’s going to get hot and sweaty real quick so an ivory bodysuit is the perf go-to for an instant sexual free-spirited look. In addition to the lace detailing on this one, the front has two brass bars that gives off a boho twist. With the last month of summer upon us, your tan will look so much better in all of your Snapchats.

2. GRLFND Cindy High-Rise Shorts

Well, no shit. Obvs plan on wearing ripped high-waisted shorts because you just like, have to for a festival. These are a little cheeky but they provide enough coverage so you’re not mooning every person who dances behind you. Ain’t nobody want to see that shit anyway.

3. Kristin Cavallari Tori Knotted Wraparound Sandal

With hippie trends during festival season come complicated strappy shoes that take up the time you should spend pregaming instead. These are cute af so you’ll have to suck it up. You’ll want a flat shoe that’s comfortable to last all day in, especially since you’ll be standing and dancing for hours. This style comes in three neutral colors, but a caramel shade is ideal for summery western vibez.

4. Whistles Astrid Embossed Leather Crossbody

Boho chic pieces come in vivid colors and mixed patterns so if you mix and match too much at once, you’ll just look like you got ready while you were blackout (which you may very well have been, but you don’t want anyone to know that necessarily). Keeping neutral tones together is what really keeps it Insta-worthy, so before you make your posse take a picture of you on your good side, match your shoes and bag for a balanced look. Find a cross body that’s big enough for at least your phone, sunglasses, possibly a flask small water bottle, and then some.

5. Celeste Charm Lariat Necklace Set

Any plunging neckline needs bling to fill up the space and bring more unnecessary attention to your cleavage because you worked hard to make it look good. Find minimalist charms like this set for a unique delicate style even if you could care less about the fucking solar system.

6. Free People Gold Spiral Metal Upper Armband

Straight from Free People’s festival shop (which is like, straight fire BTW), this arm cuff is the perf addition for a fashion-forward accessory that makes you look both v artsy and trendy. The armbands are adjustable so you can totally use it to your advantage and make your arms look toned AF or hide embarrassing farmer tans. IDK if our ancestors from Woodstock would be necessarily proud, but I feel like the Queen of Coachella aka Vanessa would be, which comes pretty close.

7. Quay Australia The Playa Sunglasses

I’m not a fan of Gigi’s mustard sunglasses and honestly, not everyone looks good in Ozzy Osbourne’s circle sunnies, so I give the holographic frame a solid 10/10 for must-have festival shades. The trippy rose gold will hide your drunk eyes and def look fab on every basic betch who already has everything in the pink metal. Since the frames are kinda trippy, you’ll probs entertain that one person in the crowd who clearly took way too many drugs for their own good. “Omg duuude, those are sick. Can I try them on?!” Let’s not but, say we did?

Read: The Best Flasks For Sneaking Alcohol In Public
 
The Fall Accessory Trends You Need To Stock Up On Now

Well, it’s officially August which means we’re headed into the dog days of summer—a time when we cram as much day drinking and rooftop bar hopping as possible into the next 4 weeks. Once September hits, we become recluses that live our best lives on the couch and Instagram eat everything that comes in pumpkin. We’ll immediately put away the sandals and bring out our over-the-knee boots, and fold away our shorts in hopes that last year’s skinny jeans still fit even though we drank our weight in alcohol and didn’t go to a gym once this summer. The good part is that a season’s beginning = new trends aka more shopping, so you’ll handle change the only way you know how: retail therapy, obviously. Whether you’re prepping for weekly blackouts at frat parties or planning to be productive (for once) at work, shop these transitional accessories to take your mind from summertime sadness to Uggs, pumpkin spice, and everything BWG (basic white girl, DUH).

1. 8 Other Reasons Athena Earrings

Expensive white gold hoops were summer’s thing this year (it was so sad) but now that summer is almost over, that shit is (thankfully) being put to a halt. Fall will be about big bold earrings that take up the entire side of your face so opt for a dainty long pair that takes away the attention from your double chin facial imperfections and can be worn down or dressed up to impress.

2. Burberry Printed Silk-Twill Scarf

Burberry and scarves are two things a betch will never leave her house without next season. Since it’ll be too warm for cashmere, find a lightweight silk scarf to dress up your blazer with. This one features color block triangles with neutral tones and the bright pop of red we’ll be seeing 24/7 soon. If choking yourself wearing scarves isn’t your thing, use it as a headband because boho chic isn’t over yet, or tie it on your bag, I guess. A for effort!!!

3. Anthropologie Braided Metallics Necklace

Since colder temps hit the east coast like a fucking brick wall, you probs won’t be that try-hard who’s still wearing plunging bodysuits come September. Unless you’re trying to call into work sick already, that is. Chokers were fun and all but similar to how much basic bitches love “Closer”, it’s overplayed and I’m sick of seeing them. Swap out shorter styles for long pendant-like necklaces that will go perf with any fall dress or plain button up shirt.

4. Vita Fede Ultra Mini Titan Crystal Band Ring

You can still collect stackable rings and look super trendy by wearing multiples, but go for a style that’s both semi-elegant and edgy. I like this one because when I’m dealing with one of my bouts of homicidal urges, I can just look at the pointy edges and contemplate the many ways I could inflict bodily harm on my enemies using just the ring on my finger. Just me?

5. Burberry Medium Lavenby Reversible Calfskin Leather Tote

Fall is the best excuse for a new bag to hold all your shit and hide the flask you may need to get you through the day. This large neutral tote has enough room for your laptop, meaningless papers, and everything else you carry with you at all times, but without sideswiping everyone you walk by. It’ll go with any outfit and put you in the all-work-no-play mood you wish you could maintain for more than like, two consecutive minutes.

6. Aldo Aressa Light Brown Women’s Open-Toe Heels

You won’t have to hide your v cute pedicure immediately with booties that easily transition your look from summer to autumn vibes. I’m honestly obsessed with these because they’re both block heel and open toe like my fave summer heels I ruined stumbling around every weekend. You can never have too many booties, IDC what anyone says. I need them in every color, so this pair is perfect for pairing with the T-shirt dress you’re not ready to give up or dark jeans come darker nights.

How To Actually Clean Your Makeup Brushes So Your Skin Doesn’t Hate You

Makeup comes as second nature to a betch. We eat, sleep, and breathe it with our fave beauty vloggers and celebs. We put a new face on everyday using only the best of the best and yet, they say we’re not artistic. My face isn’t in the MoMA so, let’s be real. Who’s the one that really doesn’t know what great art is? Puh-lease. We spend forever and a day in Sephora (or on their website, same shit) looking for the next Urban Decay palette and figuring out which brush will make our contour look 10x better. A million brushes and dollars spent later seems a little ridiculous—there’s no need to keep buying new brushes. Here’s food for thought, when was the last time you actually washed a single brush? I get it, like, we already have to wash our comforter, barely worn jeans, and now, our fucking makeup brushes, too. Life is so hard. Then, we wonder WTF we’re not doing right that we keep breaking out. I’m assuming weekly alcohol binges and cheat days don’t necessarily help but, neither does bacteria build up. Vom. Do yourself a favor and grab your brushes right now, because you def needed to clean them like, yesterday. You gon’ learn today, betch.

How Often You Have To Do This Shit?

The answer may surprise you (or not): pretty fucking often. Foundation, concealer, contour, blah, blah, blah, all those facial brushes need to be washed at least once a week. So, yeaaah, you’ve been fucking up big time for awhile now. It’s okay, though. It’s never too late to start treating your face with the respect it deserves. Doing this will get rid of oil, bacteria, and nasty shit you don’t want to blend on your face.

For brushes you use around your eyes, that’s a bit more flexible, so you can wash those about twice a month. All others should be fine if you wash them at least once a month. IDK, if this sounds like too much already, just do this shit while drinking alone, Netflix-binging, or something.

How To Wash

There are a few different methods you can use to wash your brushes. The cheapest and most convenient is using lukewarm water and unscented soap. Whoa, like, who would’ve guessed. You’ll want to gently massage the bristles and put a very small amount of soap in-between. Wash thoroughly, or until you stop seeing all that shit seeping out of them, because trust me, you’ll see it. After, gently press the bristles with a towel. Reshape and let them air dry while they hang over a sink or counter. This is probs best done on a Sunday night, just before heading into bed so you have fresh brushes to work with for the following week.

1. Sephora Collection, The Cleanse: Daily Brush Cleaner. If for whatever reason soap and water require too much effort (hi), luckily our heaven on earth, aka Sephora, has several cleaners to make you feel less like a peasant. This oil-free cleaning spray in particular can be sprayed on whatever brush you want to clean so you can reuse it as much as possible. Made with fruits and other healthy shit I don’t feel like listing, the spray will condition and protect the bristles from wear and tear. Since it dries super quick, you can do this before you start your makeup for a clean slate.

2. Sephoa Collection, Dry Clean Instant Dry Brush Cleaner Spray. I quote, “like a dry shampoo for your brushes,” this thing is basically a life-saver because we all know what dry shampoo does for our own hair. This spray doesn’t require water so, you honestly don’t have to get up off the couch to use this. Just apply directly and watch it dry instantly. Since it literally takes seconds, feel free to use it daily instead of weekly. Seriously, you don’t really have an excuse anymore for not washing your damn brushes.

3. Sephora Collection, Polish Up Silicone Brush Cleansing Pad. For synthetic brushes, you’ll want something that really scrubs in areas your hands can’t manage. Here’s where this cute AF pink glove-thing comes in the picture. It’s a cleansing pad that fits in the palm of your hand—probs as close to baseball as you’ll ever get—so while your brushes are wet with soap, scrub gently to get all the gross shit off. Just rinse off when you’re finished (fucking duh), reshape the bristles to its original stance, and let them air dry off of a flat surface.

If You’re Brush Stops Looking Like A Brush:

If at some point in the near future your makeup bristles no longer like a brush but instead like drunk Barbie’s hair here:

All the washing in the world won’t help. It’s probs a sign that you should throw that shit out ASAP and get a new brush. Except this time, try washing and taking care of it, you know? You hardly need to exert energy get off the couch in order to save money, have your contour stay on #fleek, and look hotter than ever. I mean, what other incentive do you really need?
 

How To Remove Every Kind Of Makeup Stain From All Your Stuff

It’s not an average day for me unless I wake up to some sort of self-inflicted sabotage that’s ruining my life and my room décor. Usually it’s from makeup stains on my pillows, bedding, or the only shirt I’ve ever paid more than $30 for after a happy hour gone wrong very right or a night spent avoiding human interaction re-watching Riverdale and getting so distracted by the onslaught of red heads on my screen that I forget to take my face makeup off. Either way the next morning I always have to take a good, hard look at my life choices destructive personality, ignore that moment of self-reflection, and figure out how the fuck to get rid of all these makeup stains. I’m assuming that you too are a garbage human so here’s how to get rid of every makeup stain that ruins your shit. You’re welcome.

Lipstick Stains

My aesthetic for my room is all white everything because apparently I enjoy torturing myself. As someone who is dead inside, I also only wear vampy lip colors, which is a problem because I’m constantly fucking up my white sheets when I’m blackout. Lol it’s so fun to watch myself unravel in the mornings. ANYWAY, if you’ve got a lipstick stain I’m here to save you from wanting to jump out the second story window of your shitty apartment every time you wake up to purple lip stains and cuddling a half eaten bag of chips. First, spritz the stain with hairspray and let it sit for 10ish minutes. I know, it sounds a little batshit, but it works. Next, dab the spot with a sponge and throw it into the wash. If your sheets/shirt/pillow case need to be dry-cleaned then first of all, slow clap because you’ve made it in life, but also you should use tape of some sort to remove the stain. Try that or prayer.

Foundation Stains

Tbh I don’t wear a ton of foundation but when I do it 100 percent ends up on every surface in my apartment. Even places that don’t make sense like my bedroom wall or the faux-fur rug I thought would make my apartment look less like I live on a peasant’s salary and more like I live a Carrie Bradshaw lifestyle (Writer’s Note: It did not). The first thing you should do when dealing with foundation stains is to not freak out and call your mother because she will most likely not focus on the issue at hand and instead ask you some v personal questions like why you were too drunk to remove your face makeup on a Wednesday in the first place. As if that’s the real issue here. Next, treat foundation fuck ups spills with a clarifying product like shaving cream or shampoo because both of these toiletries have cleaning agents that need to break through the stain before you throw it in the wash. Unless it’s your bedroom wall, then I would just recommend playing dumb with your landlord.

Glitter

If you wear glitter so much in your life that you need this tutorial then first of all I’d just like to say, BLESS. Here’s to hoping all that molly hasn’t rotted your brain yet. But if you’re going to dress like an adult toddler, I guess I can give you some advice for how not to sabotage your living space with the glitter bomb that is your personal style and taste. If the glitter is a part of your outfit (i.e. a dress, skirt, or any other drug-induced music festival type attire) you should spray down the whole outfit with hair spray immediately. It will dull the shine of your outfit but it will also save your apartment floors from looking like a rental space for Forever21. If the glitter is incorporated in your makeup somehow—again, BLESS—use masking tape or a lint roller to remove the sparkles from your sheets, clothing, pillow cases, etc.

Self-Tanner Stains

‘Tis the season to pretend like you enjoy leaving your couch by dousing yourself in enough self-tanner to not be shunned by your friend group. And because of this, everything I own is slowly turning orange through my best efforts to please my Instagram followers friends. Ugh. So buckle up because removing this shit ain’t gonna be fun. First rinse the affected area under cold water. Then wet a sponge with any type of dish detergent to work the spot from the outside in. This will (hopefully) cut the oil in the tanning oil enough for the stain to come out. Other things that might work on the stain are hydrogen peroxide (but make sure to spot-check first in case the fabric’s color won’t lift and you screw yourself even more) or glycerin but only use that like the Bumble Bro you drunk Snapchat—when you’re desperate.

Waterproof Makeup Stains

Waterproof makeup stains are literal sabotage and also the reason I drink. Well, not so much the reason as the aftermath, but that’s neither here nor there. For long-lasting makeup formulations, you should blot the stain with makeup remover and pray to Jesus and the lady who writes your monthly horoscope that this shit comes out. Make sure that the formula you’re using is oil-free, though, or else you’re in for an even bigger shit show.

Deodorant Stains

Deodorant stains have been ruining my life since 2002 and are also the reason my boss doesn’t like to make eye contact with me at the 9am staff meeting. This how-to is going to be especially relevant to those whose wardrobe consists of all black at all times (Hi). If you find yourself with white lines all over your body and you can’t pass it off as “Dylan’s Candy mess” or table décor (you’re fooling no one, Kimberly) then your saving grace is going to be a pair of tights or a dryer sheet. Rub the fabric against the deodorant mark and it’ll almost immediately come out off of the clothing. Blessings.

Read: How Often You Should Wash Your Sheets, Towels & Other Shit You Never Clean
 
5 Lightweight Summer Backpacks That Won’t Cause Back Sweat

Complaining about the weather is totally one of our favorite pastimes, until shit gets real and we’re actually like, sweaty or something. God forbid. There’s really nothing worse than sweating, and unless you’re paying $300 a month for a workout class that makes you sweat, you should obviously avoid perspiring at all costs. Seriously, it’s disgusting.

While antiperspirants and deodorants take care of common problem areas like your underarms, sweltering NYC heat encourages another kind of sweat to rear its ugly head—back sweat. Not only does back sweat make your morning commute that much more unpleasant (and I’m already in a bad mood when I have to wake up before noon), it also leads to bacne (I don’t even like looking at that word) and really puts a damper on all those slutty backless dresses and swimsuits you want to wear. The cute and unnecessarily expensive leather/suede backpack you haul around could, unfortunately, be contributing to the issue since leather isn’t a particularly breathable or moisture-wicking material. So, here are a few backpacks we’ve found in summer-appropriate materials, just in case the one you use for work is making you sweat like any one of us in church.

1. Rebecca Minkoff Julian Nylon Backpack

This isn’t like, a regular backpack. It’s a cool backpack. The absolute angels at Rebecca Minkoff took the Julian leather backpack and made it lightweight for summer. Dreams do come true.

2. Baggu Canvas Backpack

This cotton canvas backpack looks like it belongs on the floor of a minimalist Tumblr bedroom, but you’re probably going to just fill it with shit like chopsticks you’ll forget about and crumpled up receipts. It also has a laptop sleeve, which you’ll probably leave something important in and find two weeks later.

3. Marc Jacobs Biker Nylon Backpack

If it didn’t sound like a bad line from an Old Navy commercial, I’d tell you that this Marc Jacobs backpack is fashionable and functional. Backpacks are typically kind of nerdy, but this one is Marc Jacobs so it’s actually sorta edgy (which isn’t easily achieved by nylon bags, but whatever).

4. Herschel Retreat Backpack

Herschel is kind of like, the Vans of the backpack world. Pretty much everyone has one now, and they’re kind of making us all look like hipster dudes from Brooklyn. But they’re functional, not ugly and can probably fit a bottle of wine, so why not?

5. Kate Spade Watson Lane Large Hartley Backpack

I know we like, just said that Kate Spade isn’t cool anymore because of the whole Coach thing, but I’ve pretty much already talked shit about every other designer that you preppy betches probably love, so I’ll let you have this one thing, as long as you don’t get carried away. This nylon backpack is actually so cute and black and white stripes go with everything (just ask Kris Jenner).

The Summer Beauty Products You Need To Add To Your Makeup Bag Now

Now that Pretty Little Liars is officially over (right, Marlene King? Because I can’t take one more sets of fucking twins) there’s not much I have to live for these days. Like, do you expect me to stop wasting my youth watching 30-year-old high schoolers get psychologically tortured by a deranged Regina George wannabe and, like, actually live my life? That’s asking a lot of me. But I’m doing this new thing where I try to work on my personal growth so I guess it’s time to obsess over something else in life. Like makeup. And slowly going into credit card debt. Lol this will be fun. So here are eight beauty products that just launched and will help you live your best Instagram life this summer. You’re welcome.

1. Urban Decay Naked Heat

Urban Decay just dropped a new version of its cult-favorite basic bitch-endorsed Naked Palette, and it is the reason my rent check was late last month because priorities. The new launch includes 12 warm red-toned shades that I was SURE would make me look hideous but in fact make me look flawless like a very unknown celeb on a good beauty day.

2. Drybar Detox Whipped Dry Shampoo Foam

This product is the key to making you look less hungover at work like you don’t drink on days that end in Y. It’s a mousse, which I’m always skeptical about because usually when I wear mousse products I look less like an Herbal Essences model and more like I have dandruff. But this stuff is the real deal because it absorbs oil and doesn’t leave behind any of that powdery shit. I guess we really can have it all. Plus it gives off Drybar’s signature Blanc scent, so instead of your hair smelling like bars and fuckboys it’ll smell more like vanilla and cupcakes.

3. Milk Makeup Blur Spray

This product might be the best thing to happen to me since Seamless fucked up my order that one time and gave me extra egg rolls. Seriously, that was the gift that kept on giving. Anyway, the Milk Makeup Blur Spray is a setting spray that acts like an Instagram filter in that it makes you look like a better, more airbrushed version of yourself. Furthermore, it gives your complexion a soft-focus finish so no one will be able to see the “real” you underneath all the makeup. Blessings.

4. KKW Beauty Contour Kit

So earlier this month Kim Kardashian West broke the internet with something other than soft-core porn a super classy nude photo shoot. Shocking, I know. Kimmy launched the KKW contour kits, which I will be buying for a number of reasons but mostly because of the pure shade that went into launching a makeup line that’s in direct competition with her younger—and most fame thirsty—sister. Never change, Kim. Other than being an avid supporter of shade throwers, I’ve also always wanted to look like a Kardashian but since the only thing I have on call is the Domino’s guy and not a reputable plastic surgeon I guess I’ll have to settle for this shit. Sighs. This product has been sold out since like, the minute it launched but I’m sure you could sell a liver on the black market or something in exchange for one. Though, if it’s a liver, I might be out. Unless they want one that’s been extensively partially used 3-5 days a week for the last six years? Anyways, best of luck to you!

5. Coconut Melting Tanning Balm

If you, like me, are horrified by your summer body because you a) do not remember what sunlight looks like as it’s been your personal life’s mission to rewatch all one million seven seasons of PLL in preparation for the finale or b) have used winter as an excuse to let yourself go in all aspects of the word, then this shit is about to save your life. It looks and smells just like a standard solidified coconut oil, but when you apply it to your skin, it makes you look glowy AF while also hydrating your skin. Similar to my Bumble profile, it will give off the illusion that you’re fun and outgoing and actually leave your house to do things outside by giving you super natural-looking tan skin. Tbh there’s not much more I can ask for in this life.

6. OUAI Rose Hair & Body Oil

Jen Atkin, a coveted member of the Kardashians’ beauty slaves team, just released this restorative hair product that’s about to be an essential part of your summer beach beauty plan. It’s silicone-free and includes oils that help multitask, like absinthium oil to help hydrate your hair, rose hip oil to heal scars and redness, and shea oil to moisturize dull, dry hair. Plus it smells like a fucking dream. Seriously, it’s advertised to smell like “you own a yacht” which is a literal dream of mine.

^a deleted scene from my dream

7. Too Faced Hangover Rx 3-in-1 Replenishing Primer and Setting Spray

We’ve talked about this one before, but that’s because it saves lives makes you look less hungover on Mondays. This product just came out in June and like its primer predecessor, it’s loaded with coconut water and antibiotics to add hydration and nourishment to your dehydrated af complexion. Praise. Plus it smells like a coconut dream, which will come in handy when you’re trying to disguise the fact that your downed vodka sodas like water last night and drunk called your ex.

8. Bare Minerals Statement Matte Liquid Lip Color in Fire

I know this summer is all about the nudes—lip color and otherwise—but if you’re looking for a pop of color, this product is about to be your go-to. The color itself is your classic red with an orange twist. Tbh if you told me last month that I Elle Woods would be supportive of an orange-colored beauty product I’d say you were seriously disturbed, but now I’ve changed my stance because this color is actually chic AF. And because it’s super pigmented you don’t have to layer it on for the color payoff, THANK GOD.

5 Summery Bralettes You Can Wear As Shirts Because Boob Sweat Is The Worst

Despite the sweltering heat, summer is def the best season because it’s the one time a year a girl can dress up like a total slut and no other girls can say anything else about it. Is it really summer if you don’t see a group of basic betches like myself at like, some music festival on Randall’s Island in short-ass shorts with their ass cheeks hanging out? Um, fucking no. Not only does summer coincide with every girl looking like clones of Vanessa Hudgens at Coachella, but add in a progressive feminist movement à la #FreeTheNipple and the concept of not wearing a bra is basically as forced upon us as an irrational unicorn obsession.

If freeing the nip is all the rage, then you may as well join ‘em because I know the first thing you do when you get home (after drinking wine out of the bottle), is toss your bra onto the nearest surface. With summer fashion requiring so much boobage, the last thing you need is horrible boob sweat. Like, no fucking thank you. But even if you skip the bra, you don’t have to flash the whole city and feel as though you’re lactating with the replacement that is a versatile bralette. Here are 5 comfortable, sexy styles to wear this summer because slutty is in fashion rn no one likes wearing bras and boob sweat is fucking gross.

1. Hanky Panky Signature Lace Padded Bralette

Black lace bralettes are literally a must-have, regardless of the time of year. It’s black (fucking duh) so it not only fits in with the rest of your entire wardrobe, but if you’re into the mesh/see-through everything trend, this is perfect to use for (minimal) coverage. Since it’s wireless and v comfortable, you can layer this under an oversized crop top if you know you’ll be showing some major side boob.

2. Only Hearts Eco Lace Bralette

This neutral style fits like your fave bandeau—except without the whole falling down, having-to-pull-it-up-every-five-seconds thing. Wear this under a trendy T-shirt dress for a casual daytime look. To really look like you know WTF you’re doing, pair with dark jeans under a longline jacket in hopes your street style game is half as good as Kendall Jenner’s.

3. Pour Moi Amour Convertible Bralette C-G Cup

If you’re like me and feel as though you could have a nip slip at any moment with a tiny piece of fabric, this one is designed to keep your boobs in check regardless of their size. With size options that go all the way up to G, you can layer this bralette with or without straps and still slay the dance floor—or so tequila makes you believe.

4. Les Coquines Bette Bralette

With a style as lightweight as this, you’ll have a refreshing breeze every time you wear it so you can at least feel assured that you won’t get a sweat stain in the middle of your chest. Wear this bralette under a plunging bodysuit or jumper for an equal balance of pretty and hoe (which incidentally is my Tinder bio).

5. Ann Summers Wynne Bralette

This probably looks like that high-neck bralette you got at Victoria’s Secret and that’s because it basically is but like, this one is so much better. Unlike some rough shit that scratches you every time you fucking move, this sheer lace feels comfortable and secure enough to lounge all day in. Wear alone as a shirt with denim cut-offs or wear under a denim jacket to your next music fest.