This year has been nothing short of Earth-shattering, and with good reason. The transits we experienced this year—most notably, Saturn (structure), Pluto (transformation) and Jupiter (expansion) consistently causing contention in Capricorn—were meant to shake us to our very core. Some might say this is uncomfortable. Others might say this is insane. And still, others might say, “give me a f*cking break already.” All of those people are me and my Gemini personalities.
But here’s some good news (cue John Krasinski direct-to-camera look). We’re moving into the Age of Aquarius! Saturn and Jupiter, huge ruling planets for us here on Earth, enter into Aquarius within days of each other this month—making way for their Great Conjunction on the winter solstice, Dec 21st. This massive energy will shift us into the concepts of innovation, connectivity, and welfare for the global community.
TL;DR: 2021 will be nothing short of revolutionary. Read on to see which area of your life will be destined for growth. Make sure to check both your Sun and your Rising signs* for the utmost accuracy.
*Your Sun sign is your fundamental identity. It points to your general personality, approach to life, interests, and how you shine.
*Your Rising sign (or Ascendant) represents how you show up and the direction in which you move through the world. This sign was on the horizon at the time of your birth and therefore sets up your entire chart (which is why accurate birth time is important). It’s arguably a more predictive way to determine what you’ll encounter and how you’ll meet it.
Aries
Your freedom will come from having absolutely zero limitations on how you’re connecting with the world. This could look like having a much larger purpose to influence great change. I sincerely doubt you’ve been waiting to get in the game, but this year will give you agency to take it global. This could look like getting involved through a non-profit or taking up more space on social media to advocate for something you’re passionate about. We’re all waiting to see what you’re going to start (no pressure).
Taurus
If 2020 taught you anything, it’s that you can navigate insecurity. You’ve also learned that life is a two-way street, meaning you don’t have to do everything yourself. Recognize where you’ve gotten through de-stabilizing times with a little help from your friends. Next year gives you a great opportunity to take calculated risks to advance your career. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. We’re all rooting for you.
Gemini
Exploration and communication of the themes that have come to light in the last year will be your goal in 2021. What ultimate truths have you learned? How can you integrate these into your life philosophy? How can you help others understand? The way you communicate these will be uniquely yours, Gemini. Our advice is to make these truths snackable and lighthearted, even if the subject matter is anything but. It’s show and tell time!
Cancer
You’ve certainly had time to be intimate with yourself in 2020. How many sex toys did you buy? Be honest. But in true Cancerian fashion, you likely were more concerned with finding intimacy in a partnership. This year will encourage you to focus on yourself in order to experience true breakthroughs. And no, I’m not just talking about orgasms, but I’m not not talking about orgasms.
Leo
You’ll experience serious potential for love and partnership next year, Leo. If you’re single, make sure you’re intentionally manifesting your “perfect” partner. And simply saying “I’m manifesting a partner” will not cut it. Visualize the feeling of being with someone, take note, and then ask the universe for some help on the delivery. If you’re in a committed relationship, you’ll experience power-couple vibes. Hello, Bey and Jay.
Virgo
Personal revolution is happening for Virgos in the house of your rulership (6th house) which means you’re receiving double-down energy. This would be the year to feel completely supported in focusing on your health and routines, getting your edge through the use of technology. Oh, and domestic matters will be your bitch, too. So hey, if you’ve been thinking about buying a Peloton, this is your sign. (No, they didn’t pay me to say that.)
Libra
F*ck the establishment, Libra! 2021 has you feeling all sorts of brave, playful and yes, maybe a little rebellious. Will this shock the people around you, since you of all people like to color inside the lines? Sure. Does that really matter? Not in the least. Give yourself permission to take the spotlight, or at least the ring light, and do what makes you happy.
Scorpio
Mastering family life and maternal instincts will be on your radar next year, Scorpio. This could look like establishing the house rules for everyone in your domain or simply establishing how you’d like your own chosen family to run. Remember that the very nature of family means it’s more of a democracy than a dictatorship, so try your best to be firm, yet accommodating on the issues you could care less about, like where you put the TV. You can’t make every hill the one you’re willing to die on.
Sagittarius
You normally travel the world for inspiration, but this year you’ll be called to learn from your immediate environment, your neighborhood, or simply your closest friends and family. Your new approach will have a well-spring of creative ideas percolating for you all year, and you’ll want to talk to your newfound teachers about them. Take that airplane out of your Instagram bio once and for all, and make an impact in your neighborhood instead, Sagittarius.
Capricorn
Listen closely, because this one is def going to be music to your ears, Capricorn. Next year holds major earning potential for you. (I can literally hear a collective YES!) All the work you’ve put into your craft will certainly pay off next year, so enjoy watching the stacks rise. That said, try bringing something back into the fold that you scrapped this year for lack of time or expertise. You’ll have more resources to revive it this year.
Aquarius
It’s your time, Aquarius. You’re THE most equipped for this new age we’re entering, so don’t be surprised if you feel the intrinsic need to step out and lead this revolution. Everyone is catching up to your line of thinking, but we do actually need you to be constantly innovating and moving the needle forward. Your gut will rarely be wrong—just go with it and don’t second-guess it.
Pisces
Bless my Pisces, always ready to be everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Next year will have you fully embracing who you are, the magical mystery tour that is life. Walk into the unknown the same way most of us walk into Target: willfully blissful and leaving with so much more than we intended to. (Also, not sponsored.)
Images: Kwangmoozaa / Shutterstock; Giphy (12)
Who says steamy romance is just for the summer? This week, with Venus in fiery Leo and Mars linking up with its celestial partner in Aries, you can expect things to get hot. And don’t think it’s just limited to romance: this powerful trine has the ability to ignite just about every aspect of your life. Just so long as you don’t let all the attention go to your head.
Aries
You’ve never been afraid to speak your mind, Aries, so no need to start now. With Venus and Mars working together, now is the time for you to let someone special know how you really feel. That way you can finally get to the fun part of the relationship (aka them coming over and logging you in on all their parents’ fancy TV channels).
Taurus
Coupled-up bulls might feel the urge to change up the routine this week. Sure, you and your beloved have been spending every waking moment together, but how much of that is real quality time? Plan something nice to do together that’s not walking to the same little park you’ve been walking to every single day.
Gemini
Time to get your flirt on, Gemini! This week Venus and Mars are coming together to tell you to go for it. Send that risky text. Slide into that person’s DMs. And post your thirst traps with abandon. You can always delete the evidence at a later time.
Cancer
This week will bring some major clarity, in a good way, to one of your relationships. If things have seemed murky and you can’t quite remember what it is you like about this person, by the end of the week you should remember exactly what it is. (And yes, it’s okay if the answer is abs.)
Leo
With Venus in your sign and Mars in fellow fire sign Aries, you’re going to be what we in the biz call “a little extra” this week. You’re ordering Postmates with abandon. You’re wearing your most glam looks (even with nowhere to go), and you are absolutely going off in the group chat. Sorry to anyone who can’t handle it.
Virgo
The creative energy is flowing thanks to Venus and Mars this week, so what are you gonna do about it? If you’ve been feeling stuck in an aspect of your life, don’t be surprised if you find a burst of inspiration this week. You’ll be living your Carrie Bradshaw dreams in no time.
Libra
An old flame might try to pop back into your life this week, Libra. Mars in retrograde means that someone from your past could decide to attempt a repeat appearance, should you let them. Will you give in to temptation? Maybe. Will you text every detail to the group chat as it happens? Absolutely.
Scorpio
Cut your partner some slack this week, Scorpio, as Mars may have you itching for a fight. Yes, the way they texted “k” instead of “k!” was objectively rude, but as a wise woman once said, “Kim, there are people who are dying.” Spare yourself the drama.
Sagittarius
Time to put your money where your mouth is when it comes to your relationships, Sagittarius. Have you been being the best partner/friend/child/sibling/coworker you can be? Chances are, there’s someone in your life you’ve been slacking on. Pay them a little extra attention this week before you end up the next entry in their burn book.
Capricorn
This week you may be feeling the urge to get closer to someone in your life, with Venus and Mars pushing you toward close-knit domestic feelings. Just make sure you don’t try to manufacture the closeness with someone who doesn’t deserve to see you at your wifey-est. That’s for VIPs only.
Aquarius
This week has you looking on the bright side of life, Aquarius, no matter what the news and/or your sh*tty ex throws your way. You’re feeling good, and nobody can bring you down. In fact, you’re actually feeling *good* about the future of things. And they said in 2020 it couldn’t be done…
Pisces
A truth you’ve been trying to outrun will finally catch up with you this week, Pisces. Don’t let yourself compromise your core values just to avoid an awkward situation. Momentary awkwardness is better than actually agreeing to do another virtual escape room with your college dorm mates.
Images: Giphy (12)
It may be hard to believe given the fact that you’re probably just now surfacing from a food- and alcohol-induced coma, but there’s magic in the air this weekend. The Sun and Jupiter both enter Capricorn today, a union that only takes place once every 12 years, which means that for the next two days, anything could happen. Yes, maybe even getting off your parent’s couch and eating a vegetable, but let’s not get too crazy.
Aries
This weekend is brining good news, Aries. Let’s just say that some long-awaited things will finally be coming to fruition, and it’s all down to your hard work and borderline obsessive dedication. Whatever, the ends justify the means, right? This could be a small-scale achievement or something that’s been a long time in the making, so make sure you celebrate accordingly!
Taurus
This weekend is the perfect time to pursue any passions or adventures that you’ve been holding yourself back from, Taurus. You’ll find yourself not only acutely motivated to get after them, but suddenly with the means of doing so as well. Don’t waste this opportunity! It’s time to, dare I say, take the bull by the horns (I know, I’m sorry).
Gemini
This is a weekend for bold moves, Gemini. You’ve had something to say for a while now and have been uncharacteristically quiet about it. Well guess what? NOT ANYMORE. Arm yourself with your favorite form of liquid courage and then make your voice heard. It’s the holidays, so you don’t need to worry about the ramifications until next week.
Cancer
The union of Jupiter and the Sun is going to give you that extra boost of courage to start making moves, Cancer. If there are things being left unsaid, or relationships that could use a little definition, this is the weekend for getting after it. Your typical aversion to change will be nowhere in sight for the next two days, so don’t be afraid to go big.
Leo
If there’s anything about your life that you’ve been unsatisfied with, Leo, this is the weekend for tackling it. For the next few days you’re going to find yourself dedicated to making changes, be they personal, environmental, or physical, and there’s a good chance they’ll actually stick. Don’t be afraid to take a good look at your life (almost impossible to do this time of year, I know) and figure out which parts of it you’re unhappy with. Does this almost sound like a New Year’s resolution? Well, yeah. But just less cliche.
Virgo
It’s time to start repping yourself, Virgo. You’ve been working hard—on your career, on your relationships, on yourself—and it’s time that people started recognizing it. You don’t need some big occasion to showcase how great you are, just get out there and let the people know what you’ve been up to. Recognition is an important step in the process, and well-deserved at this point.
Libra
This weekend you’ll find yourself wanting to connect with family and friends. Don’t fight it! That’s literally what the holidays are for! Don’t feel guilty shirking social responsibilities in lieu of kicking back with the people you care about, and likely don’t get to see as often. There’s nothing quite so soothing as looking like a total bum on your parents’ couch, watching movies and eating food that your normal self wouldn’t be caught dead even looking at. Soak it all in! This doesn’t happen all that often.
Scorpio
Your weekend forecast shows 100% chance of functional communication, Scorpio. Maybe not the outlook you were hoping for, but one that is very much needed. Spend the next couple days getting things off your chest, that way you can go into the new year with a clear conscious and substantially less baggage. It may not always be the easiest route, but it’s the one that will have you feeling better in the long run.
Sagittarius
You hear that, Sagittarius? It’s the sweet dulcet tones of you spending a bunch of money this weekend. Those post-Christmas sales won’t know what hit them. You’ve done a great job of being financially responsible this year (for the most part), so what better way to celebrate than getting out there and spending all that holiday cash? Don’t feel guilty—you deserve a treat now and then, too.
Capricorn
Get ready, Capricorn, because this weekend you’re going to go against all your instincts and do the one thing you truly hate doing: take a risk. We promise, it’s going to be okay. The Sun and Jupiter moving into Capricorn is going to have you feeling like luck is on your side, and it’s time to finally make those bold moves you’ve been secretly plotting for months. You’ve thought about it, dreamt about it, spent an outrageous amount of time strategizing around it, which just leaves one thing left: doing it.
Aquarius
This weekend is about you, Aquarius. That’s it. The only things you need to concern yourself with the next 72 hours is what you want, what you need, and what position you’re most comfortable in pursuing those two things. The new year and all the stress that comes with it is right around the corner, so hold onto this last bit of 2019 and use it to rest before real life kicks back in.
Pisces
The Sun and Jupiter entering Capricorn has fostered the perfect environment to get the gang back together. You’re feeling social, you’re feeling nostalgic, and you’re feeling like maybe getting day drunk—so call up your friends and make it happen! Being an adult means that these kind of reunions don’t get to happen as often as we’d like, so take advantage of the downtime and relive your college years—you know, when you just hung out on a couch with your friends all day and worried about literally nothing. Ah, youth.
Images: Giphy (12)
Venus enters Aquarius today, which means the weekend just got a lot more exciting. From social butterflies to sleepy homebodies, everyone is about to kick things up a couple notches. Prepare yourself for the madness by checking out our weekend horoscopes.
Aries
Venus entering Aquarius this weekend means one thing, Aries: your social calendar is about to pop off. For the next few days you’ll find that you suddenly have limitless energy for entertaining and given the time of year, it didn’t come a minute too soon. Take advantage of this boon and be sure to light up the room at every event you attend. Going home for the holidays inevitably means running into people from your past (both good and bad), so you might as well make it worth their while.
Taurus
There’s good news on the horizon, Taurus. All your hard work is about to pay off in a big way, but under one condition: that you keep at it. It can be tempting to abandon work for a seemingly limitless supply of Christmas cookies and mulled wine, but you’ve got to stay strong. Months of patience will finally lead to what you’ve been waiting for, so avoid the peppermint schnapps until you’ve achieved what you set out to do. After that, though? All bets are off.
Gemini
Spontaneity is in the air this weekend, Gemini. Venus entering Aquarius is going to inspire you to drop everything in the pursuit of a grand adventure. And you know what? Maybe it’s worth pursuing. You’ve had a hard year and have more than earned the right to blow off a little steam. This weekend, consider shirking responsibility and doing whatever your heart desires. What are the holidays for if not a little indulgence?
Cancer
Love is in the air, Cancer! Or at least, the newfound patience and desire to work for it is. Venus entering Aquarius means that you’re going to suddenly find yourself ready to settle down, or take an existing relationship to the next level. Don’t fight it! Let yourself be swept up in the madness and see where it takes you. After all, ‘tis the season to be merry—and if that means hooking up with your high school crush, so be it.
Leo
You may find yourself feeling extra needy this weekend, Leo. Don’t worry, that’s just Venus settling into Aquarius and stirring up some formerly stifled emotions. Let yourself lean on those close to you, and don’t be ashamed to admit that you might be in need of some extra TLC. Even you are allowed to let your guard down every once in a while.
Virgo
You’re getting your groove back this weekend, Virgo. You may have found yourself feeling entirely unmotivated lately and chalked it up to pre-holiday procrastination. Well now that Venus has entered Aquarius, you’re back in business. Take advantage of this sudden onslaught of productivity by finishing all those projects you’d been putting off. Two weeks off will be all the sweeter knowing you’re coming back to a clean to-do list.
Libra
Time to put away the groutfit and break out the party dress, Libra. This weekend marks the beginning of your return to society, something you’ve been desperately avoiding these past few weeks. There’s no better time to make an entrance than during peak holiday season. Treat yourself to a little extra glam and then hit the town. It’s time to close out 2019 in style.
Scorpio
There’s nothing wrong with taking a break, Scorpio. The holiday season has already worn you out, so this weekend is the perfect time to recharge before diving back into the swing of things. Invite your friends over for a chill night on the couch or, better yet, turn off your phone and get in some quality you time. The world will survive without you for two days, but you may not last through one more Christmas party without a break.
Sagittarius
If you’re looking for a sign to let loose this weekend, consider this it, Sagittarius. Just because your birthday season is coming to a close, it doesn’t mean that it’s time to dive back into bed. You’ve still got energy to expend! So dust off those party shoes for one last hurrah, and make sure to leave a bottle of water by your bed. You can sleep when you’re dead, right?
Capricorn
It’s going to feel like life is pulling you in two direction this weekend, Capricorn. While it may feel easy to succumb to one or the other, we highly recommend you opt for a little balance. Your all-or-nothing personality may reject this notion, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try it. What is the holiday season about, if not compromise?
Aquarius
You’re no stranger to being the center of attention, Aquarius. In fact, it’s a position you inhabit with glee. This weekend will be no different—if anything, it’ll be even more over-the-top than usual. We urge you to be sure to take care of yourself while you’re out entertaining the entire town, because you of all people know how exhausting the limelight can be. You don’t have to dim your light, but do be sure to recharge it.
Pisces
You know what you’ve earned, Pisces? Some peace and quiet. After what feels like a lifetime of entertaining, organizing, and just general socializing, it’s time to take a break. Use this weekend to kick off your self-imposed exile. Your Netflix queue is overflowing, your bed is calling, and that takeout isn’t going to order itself. Feel free to go fully off the grid without any guilt, and then consider returning to the real world come Monday. Or, you know, don’t.
Images: Giphy
They say summer is the best season to fall in love, but I beg to differ. See, what most people don’t realize is, the weather is a major game-changer. It can truly make or break your sizzling love affair. One thing’s for sure: When the temperature drops, our panties follow mother nature’s lead. It’s inevitable. Cupid always makes a cryptic cameo once the fall and winter roll around, which is why this time of year is often referred to as “cuffing season.” People aren’t just looking to just get it in during cuffing season. On the contrary, they are looking to get cuffed… in every sense of the word. Do yourself a favor and test your luck during the next cold front.
So what will cuffing season bring for you? Thotumn, a real relationship, all of the above? These are your cuffing season horoscopes:
Aries
Taurus
Gemini
Cancer
Leo
Don’t air out your dirty laundry just yet, Leo. Try to keep some things to yourself—especially while texting your crush. Seriously, you’re going to have to put those jealous claws away before you scare them off. Sit tight, though. The real fun will begin once Sagittarius season (November 22) rolls around. That is, if you put your ego away, of course.
Virgo
Bask in the pleasures of life, Virgo. Single and ready to mingle? You’ll be craving the finer things and indulging in your comfort for the majority of October. And while there’s absolutely nothing wrong with a mental health day, it’s important that you put your picture-perfect checklist away before you let something good go to waste. After all, there’s no such thing as perfect, you know.
Libra
You’re in love with love, Libra. Your birthday season will be swirling with romance, and you’ll be feeling as irresistible as ever. Then again, when are you not adorably charming? Let your crush wine and dine you this season, especially once November rolls around. The sun will be shaking up your pleasure-seeking second house of money, and if you’re not splurging at the mall, you might as well let someone worship you.
Scorpio
Trick or treat, Scorpio. Cuffing season has your name written all over it, because who are we kidding? You know a thing or two about those autumn and winter nights. Lana Del Rey song or not…mid-October and November will be sizzling with passion, and your crush(es) won’t able to resist your sultry poker face. Quit playing games with their hearts, Scorpio. Karma is a messy bitch who lives for drama.
Sagittarius
Don’t be afraid to take the unconventional route, Sagittarius. Your social life will be lit in October, so decide whether or not you want to keep people “friend-zoned,” or if you think they deserve that holiday hall pass. As cliche as this sounds, having a friend with benefits is very likely during this time. The good news is, you’ll most likely keep it a secret, given November’s rather cryptic astrology transits.
Capricorn
Try taking a walk on the wild side, Capricorn. Trust me when I tell you, being uptight is not a good look for you. Just so you know, it’s not that there aren’t any opportunities for love this season, it’s that you’re usually too pragmatic to realize what’s right in front of you. I’m totally serious, too. Besides, with the sun beaming through your shady 12th house of secrets towards the end of November, no one will have to know. What do I mean by that, exactly? Go and get your secret love affair on, Capricorn. You’ll thank me later.
Aquarius
Is there TSA Pre for the mile-high club, Aquarius? OK, I’m kidding. Aside from charming your superiors to death this cuffing season, you could also be traveling for business more than usual during this time. What’s it going to be? Business or pleasure? Venturing into unknown territory is inevitable towards the beginning of October, so try to make it a good time. However, don’t do anything too crazy, because once November rolls around, you’ll be back in the spotlight.
Pisces
Despite your innate desire for intimacy and soul-to-soul connection, you’re also very guarded… even with your more serious partners. What are you afraid of, Pisces? I’m not saying you’re doomed this season, I am simply advising that you go with the flow. Although, one thing’s for sure: November will be an adventure. With the sun beaming through your expansive ninth house of travel, you might decide to take an impromptu vacation and perhaps meet someone along the way.
Images: Unsplash; Giphy (12)
No matter how long it’s been since you’ve had an actual back to school, the back to school energy is in the air, and it’s time to get your sh*t together. Is it any wonder that this very special time of year falls directly in the middle of Virgo season? The stars work in mysterious ways… Here’s what you need to know this week so you can get things on track, whether it’s in the classroom, the boardroom, or the bedroom.
Aries
Last week’s Virgo wellness energy is continuing into this week as you stay focused on health and self-care. I’m talkin’ green smoothies. I’m talkin’ superfoods. I’m talkin’ HIIT classes that make you feel like you want to vomit, or die, or vomit and then die. No pain, no gain Aries! But it’ll all be worth it when you can finally open a jar of pickles without asking for assistance.
Taurus
Focus up, Taurus! You’ve been getting distracted by shiny objects lately (understandable), but it’s time to cultivate some appreciation for the sh*t that’s right in front of you. What are you thankful for right now? By taking a little time this week to appreciate what you have, you’ll be more refreshed and ready for all the amazing things to come!
Gemini
Put on your fluffiest robe and slip on your house shoes, because this week is all about the comforts of home, Gemini! The stars are giving you permission to cancel every last plan you thought you had this week and trade them in for seven consecutive nights of couch potato-ing. And after a full summer of being a social butterfly, you f*cking need it. Don’t be afraid to hibernate! Your fans—I mean friends—will still be there when you return.
Cancer
You’re still floating around like the social butterfly you are this week, Cancer, and channels of communication are open. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself going deep in the group chat, or missing half the party because you got caught up talking about the meaning of life. Human interaction in fueling you right now, so take it where you can get it. Just remember, your server doesn’t actually want to hear your life story. They’re just a person working for tips.
Leo
Summer is (basically) over, Leo, and it’s time to get serious. Specifically, it’s time to get serious about money. Gone are the days when you spend your entire paycheck on last minute beach trips. The holidays will be here sooner than you think, and IOUs are not acceptable presents. Start saving now and wow everyone with your gift giving abilities come December. (And who loves wow-ing everyone more than a Leo??)
Virgo
Finally! It’s your season, and for exactly one month people will care about having their sh*t together as much as you do. Okay so, nobody actually cares about having their sh*t together as much as you do, but they’re trying and you appreciate it. Okay, no you don’t, but still…it’s not a bad thing. Don’t be surprised if you have a lot of people hitting you up for advice this week, hoping to steal some of that Virgo glow for themselves. Just remember, you can’t fix everyone. Don’t even try.
Libra
You’re a hurricane of creativity right now Libra, so don’t let it go to waste! Now is the perfect time to sign up for a local drink-and-draw class, or to bust out the ol’ adult coloring book and start coloring in those lines—or don’t color in the lines. I don’t want to stifle you. Just be sure to find a healthy outlet for your creativity so it doesn’t burst out in the form of increasingly creative new insults for your ex.
Scorpio
Connect with your inner Billie Eilish this week and let your freak flag fly, Scorpio! You’re not in the mood for anything mundane or “normal,” so it’s time to hit up your weirdest friend (you know, the one who moved to a cannabis commune and changed her name to ‘Star Fruit’) and embrace the odd! I’m not saying you have to go full Midsommar, but a little Halloween-in-August energy never hurt anybody.
Sagittarius
Goooooooooooals! You’re all about them this week, Sagittarius. Don’t be surprised if career advancements and opportunities find you. The stars are aligned for some major money moves this week, so keep an eye out for opportunities in unexpected places and get ready to shine. Even if you’re not feeling particularly motivated yourself, put on your best boss b*tch face and fake it ‘til you make it. You’ll be happy that you did.
Capricorn
Fun fact, Capricorn: in Greek mythology, Capricorn was represented by Pan, aka the “horny sea goat” of the zodiac. And you’re uh…embracing that ancestry this week. Yep. That’s right. It’s sexy time. The work that you put in to shake up your love life last week is coming (literally) to fruition this week, so maybe keep those nights open. Actually, you might wanna keep your mornings open too. Just saying…
Aquarius
Keep an eye out for romantic connections in unexpected places this week, Aquarius. Maybe it’s time for a recalibration of your standards? Not saying you need to start dating someone who still lives with their mom and thinks cargo shorts are fancy, but maybe you don’t have to swipe left on anyone under 6’7. There are plenty of 6’5-ers out there who are also deserving of love. (And you can always make them wear lifts if necessary).
Pisces
You’re another sign that’s feeling the urge to flirt this week, Pisces, and your best bet may be someone outside your typical type. Worse case scenario: you have a subpar hook up with someone you weren’t really sure you’d like that much anyway. Best case scenario: turns out your mailman was the love of your life all along. Who knew?!?!
Images: Giphy (12)
Welcome to Virgo season—do you have your day planner ready? Virgo is a sign that is known for very much having its sh*t together, meaning this month is the perfect time to clean up the (literal) hot mess that has been your summer. Harness some of that old back-to-school energy and get your life in order for fall. And yes, buying a new fall wardrobe totally counts as “harnessing back-to-school energy.” Your bank account might hate you, but whatever. You’re welcome.
Aries
You’re finally ready to get back on the wellness train, Aries, so you’d better get caught up on the latest Diet Starts Tomorrow podcast (shameless plug). As the balls-to-the-wall Leo Season energy starts to give way to significantly more responsible Virgo, you’re finding yourself with the motivation to actually make it to that 6am yoga class, or to stay through the stretching at SoulCycle. Beyoncé thighs, here you come!
Taurus
Looks like you’re the responsible one. Again. This week you may find lots of friends, coworkers, and random ass people at the bar are relying on you for very basic sh*t. Annoying, I know, but at least it goes to show that the world sees you as someone who actually has it together. If only they knew the truth…
Gemini
Cuffing season starts now, Gemini, as Virgo season has you looking to stop f*cking around and just settle down already. You’re over playing the field, and ready for some lay-around-in-bed-all-day-watching-Office-reruns type of love. Aka the best type of love there is. Go out there and find it!
Cancer
Virgo season has transformed you from a social caterpillar into a social butterfly this week, Cancer, so make sure to take advantage of it. No event is too far. No happy hour too stressful. For one week, you are 100% that bitch who stays out late on a Tuesday and somehow keeps the party going ’til Friday. Don’t waste this opportunity to go hard as f*ck before summer ends, and please preemptively stock up on Pedialyte for Sunday.
Leo
Hate to tell you this Leo, but your season is coming to a close. I know, I know, every season is Leo season when you’re a Leo, but it’s Virgo’s time to shine. Use this as an opportunity to chill tf out for a sec, and to relax and recharge after a whole month of non-stop limelight. Basically, use this as an excuse to book yourself a massage.
Virgo
Welcome to your season, Virgo! Starting this Wednesday, everybody is going to want a piece of that Virgo glow. As you know, being popular is v fun, but it’s also v exhausting, so be sure you’re not burning the candle at both ends trying to give the masses what they want. Your fans—I mean friends—will love you no matter what.
Libra
You might want to send out a preliminary “I’m sorry” text right now, because for the next week you’re going to be that person who can’t stop talking about their dreams. Sorry, but it is how it is. Virgo season is supercharging your dream realm, and it’s going to be hard to keep all the crazy sh*t your brain is feeding you every night straight. Maybe invest in a dream journal?
Scorpio
What is that strange feeling, Scorpio? Is it…? Could it be…? You being opent to trying new things!?!? I thought I’d never see the day! The new season has you looking for new horizons, and for the first time in a while you’re ready to shake up the routine. Try that weird underwater kickboxing thing you saw on ClassPass. Hit up a new bar. Swipe right on someone with a f*ckton of gym selfies…actually don’t do that last one. Too risky.
Sagittarius
Virgo season is making you want to get sh*t done in your love life, Sag, whether you’re single or not. If you are single, take a look at your standards. Are you setting the bar too low in certain places? Too high in others? Plenty of people have made an Andriod-iPhone relationship work. Just sayin’. If you’re in a relationship, now is a really good time to start working on something with your partner, whether it be a business venture, project around the house, or just some cute ass cupcakes you saw on Pinterest that will inevitably turn out terrifying when you try to make them.
Capricorn
You’re looking to shake things up in your love life, Capricorn, and per usual, the only person you can rely on is yourself. Try making a date outside your usual bars/restaurants, or plan a last-minute romantic vacation before you don’t have summer Fridays to keep you sane anymore. Nobody has ever regretted a last minute beach trip.
Aquarius
Virgo season has you ready to go deep, Aquarius, so don’t be surprised if you temporarily become that chick at the bar asking everyone what they think happens after you die. You’re just in a mood. Honor your inner philosopher this week by starting a new book, watching an interesting documentary, or just doing something for yourself that feels spiritual. It’ll help stop you from hitting a vape pen and asking everyone if they believe in the Matrix later.
Pisces
You’re feeling veeery coupley this week Pisces, so be aware of getting too clingy with your partner. Sending an “I miss you!” text is cute once per day, not once per hour. Try to make plans for some quality time later in the week, so you’ll get the attention you crave without breaking into anyone’s apartment.
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It’s the motherf*cking weekend, and it’s time to submit to the stars and planets for whatever those jerks have in store for us! Whether you’re destined for love, fights with your mom, or attempts at reorganizing your closet by color and season again (literally impossible), here’s what you can expect from your horoscopes this weekend.
Leo
Everyone wants a piece of you, Leo. Someone on Friday finds you especially hot, so feel free to throw inhibitions to the wind and f*cking go for it. By Saturday, you’ll have completely switched gears and you’ll have finances and careers on the brain. Think about what you really want, then talk to daddy’s investor friends and see what they think.
Virgo
You and your SO are feeling uber connected this weekend, so go with it. Tackle something that proved difficult in the past on Saturday—like donating old sh*t or reorganizing your shared space. Come Sunday, the efforts will prove to have been really enlightening and uplifting. Plus, you’ll actually have room to have people over. Remember—the memories of you college-age “Live, Laugh, Love” sign can live on in your heart, but not so much on your bathroom wall.
Libra
You’re like, such a good person, Libra. You’ve spent the last few weeks being a kind caregiver, and this weekend it’ll pay off for you. So, yes, keep listening to your BFF go on about her tragic dating life while pounding rosé with her. Or tell your boss all of her ideas are like, so inspiring—even if they kinda aren’t. Continue connecting through Sunday, when a joint hiking trip or yoga class could lead to something super beneficial for you (other than great muscle definition).
Scorpio
You’re intriguing af, Scorpio, so embrace it this weekend—especially if you’re single. And with the week having been intense as it was, try to take Friday and Saturday as a chance to slam a few brewskis and chill tf out. Take Sunday to reset a bit, as you’ll feel kinda drained, and Monday always sucks enough on its own.
Sagittarius
Time to organize your sh*t, Sagittarius. You’ve had a super inspiring month so far, and focusing on re-organizing your closet, kitchen, and whatever else you’ve ignored at home this weekend will only continue the awesome trend. Be like Marie Kondo, and “love mess.” Also, communication is key this weekend, so whether you’re arguing with your SO about where to go to dinner on Friday night or debating sending a mean email in time for work on Monday, remember to be clear in your messaging.
Capricorn
Rinse and repeat, Capricorn. You’ve been kind of, er, intense in the romance department lately, so it may be a good opportunity to take the weekend and reset. There isn’t anything wrong with you; the planets are just, like, f*cking your emotions up. Heading to see a decent band play on Friday or Saturday night can help drown out the many, many voices in your head.
Aquarius
Get your sh*t together, Aquarius. You’ve been crazy intensely focused on those around you, and it’s time to flip the script this weekend. What do you want? Reassess both your emotional and financial needs and create a personal care plan, fam. It’s time to adult. On the subject of adulting, the full moon in your sign will have your sexy time skills TOP f*cking NOTCH, so grab a partner and f*cking go to town. I mean, there’s really nothing else to do, right?
Pisces
We’re on a f*cking rollercoaster, Pisces, and it isn’t all bad. Get ready for up and down emotions and romance Friday through Sunday. But you can totally get through it unscathed if you lean on friends and family for support. Plus, by Sunday, with a little kindness you’ll be able to inspire love and devotion payable to you. Foot rubs, massages, multi-course Mexican dinners, and more can be on the docket if you’re focused, nice, and patient with the people around you.
Aries
Become a picture of health, Aries, and it’ll pay off. This weekend, take a sec to focus on aligning your chakras or whatever, and less time on chugging mimosas and slamming tacos (shhhh, hush—there’s always next weekend for that). Hit up the gym, go for a run, or actually just try to like, go outside at some point. Plus, by focusing on your own mental and physical health Friday and Saturday, you’ll be ready to lend an emotionally helping hand to a friend going through some sh*t on Sunday.
Taurus
Everything is so f*cking awesome this weekend that it’s likely to scare you, Taurus. But don’t get weird about it. This new view on everything being amazing will help lift up others around you that may be kind of in the dumps. Plus, Uranus and the full moon this past Thursday lined some sh*t up to make for a social and fortunate weekend, so get out and do something like brunch with betches or a group outing.
Gemini
Friends and gifts make for a fruitful weekend, Gemini. A coworker or close confidante could be gifting you with information that’ll come in handy at work on Monday, or in your after-work social circles. Don’t go overboard with your new knowledge, and remember: Spider-Man always told us that with great power comes great responsibility. The full moon in Aquarius will make social situations super fun Friday through Sunday, so don’t cancel plans. You could meet someone, like, actually worth your time.
Cancer
Follow your gut, Cancer, especially on Saturday. It could lead you to fun, romantic, and weird-but-chill times. Your SO may be extra antsy to achieve his or her own goals this weekend, so it could be a stellar opportunity to bring up that house project they haven’t finished yet. Remember to try and be a guiding force and not a naggy, mean one. K? If you’re single, treat yourself to a spa weekend then head out on the town. Uranus is making you look like an extra amazing snack on Friday and Saturday, so f*cking own it.
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