Mondays always suck, unless it’s the day after literally any award show. There’s truly nothing better than sitting at your desk, pretending to work as you scroll through Instagram and judge the shit out of all the red carpet looks. As you’ve probably seen if you follow any celebrities on any form of social media, last night was the American Music Awards. Let’s give compliments like a drunk girl in a bathroom then talk shit about the worst dressed, shall we?
Okay, all extra celebrities, please take notice. Demi’s look is like, the perfect example of the perfect music award show red carpet look. The dress is super flattering, the hair and makeup is incred, and overall it kind of has an edgy vibe but is still a classic look. Well done, Lovato.
Honestly, Selena has kinda been on my nerves recently for literally no reason whatsoever, so this is difficult for me to say, but I’m obsessed with this look. Usually a drastic post-breakup hair change is a bad move, but when you’re rich AF and can get back into a relationship with Justin Bieber like, a week later, the rules don’t apply. I love this new (old?) Selena.
Gaga wasn’t even technically at the red carpet at the AMAs—she was at the Washington D.C. stop of her tour—and she still looked better than everyone else. She rocked an Alaïa to honor the recently passed designer (RIP) and channeled some major Madonna vibes. Into it.
Pretty sure Ciara’s sole purpose in life is to just be hotter than the rest of the human population. This dress is so dope. Plus, her hair and makeup is perfect but still looks natural.
TBH, Kehlani’s dress is kind of eh, but I’m considering her one of the best simply because she can pull off a low ponytail without looking like a founding father.
I have no idea who you are, but I hate your dress. Sorry. It’s very Miranda Hobbes and the boots kind of look like a serial killer made them out of human skin à la Silence of the Lambs.
I’m putting Demi down for best dressed and worst dressed, because not even the most flawless styling could balance out this dress. She looks like a walking lava lamp. This is potentially one of my least favorite dresses in history.
Even P!nk looks pissed to be wearing this dress. It kind of looks like a fancy loofah that came with the Bath and Body Works gift set your dad’s new girlfriend bought you for Christmas after your parents’ divorce.
I’m confused as to what is happening here. This dress probably had good intentions (even if it’s made out of a fabric I would have worn to a friend’s bat mitzvah in 2004), but then it decided to allow Bebe’s boobs to try to run away from each other. Also, just looking at the cut of the dress paired with the shoes stresses me out, because I keep picturing Bebe falling over and having to do the worm instead of walk.
I mean, if the end goal here was to channel Lydia Deetz from Beetlejuice, then this look is killer. But like, I’m assuming that wasn’t the point. This year, Comme des Garçons has kinda scammed everyone into thinking that it’s fashionable to wear heaps of fluffy red fabric, but this look obviously isn’t working.
The American Music Awards are pretty pointless. It’s unclear who actually decides the winners of these awards, and most of the performances just feel like overdone publicity stunts. Enter, Selena Gomez.
We were low-key excited to see what Selena did on Sunday night, as it was her first TV performance in over a year, and her first public appearance since ditching The Weeknd and getting back with Justin Bieber. And it was fuckin’ weird.
First of all, she’s blonde now. We don’t necessarily hate it, but we’re not sure if it’s actually an improvement? Idk, not everyone needs to be blonde. But really, her hair color was the least questionable thing about her performance.
She performed “Wolves,” her new song featuring Marshmello, who wears a giant robot head à la Deadmau5, and he was banging on some drums off to the side, which obviously added a lot to the performance. Selena was wearing a white nightgown, and her hair looked like she just took a shower, but with bacon grease instead of water.
She starts out on the ground in front of an old car with the headlights on, so we’re thinking she maybe got like hit by the car and then is dead now? Or something? Then all these girls who look like they escaped from the 1800s come running in, and they dance around her and lift her in the air, and there’s really just a lot going on.
The biggest issue with the performance was that Selena was definitely lip synching, which is pretty rough. Like, even if you’re still recovering from your kidney surgery or whatever, you couldn’t at least sing along to the backing track? Selena’s never been known for her powerhouse vocals, but usually you can actually hear her trying.
The other really weird thing was that usually Selena ends her performances with a smile and a “thank you,” a fact I definitely know by researching it and not off the top of my head because I’ve seen all her live performances. Anyway, this time she just gave a dejected look and a half-hearted “thank you”, kind of like you do when an ugly guy calls you cute.
So what the hell is going on? Is Selena regretting all her choices, like going back to her fuckboy ex? Did she like, forget about the performance until 30 minutes before? Is the old Selena dead and we’re now ushering in a new, darker Selena? We’ll have to wait and see what the next few months look like for her, because Sunday night kicked things off to a really confusing start.