Starbucks Is Marketing To Betches In Training

According to some crack reporting by Cosmo (surprising, I know), Starbucks is releasing a new S'mores flavored frappuccino, so now you can pretend to go camping while drinking 4000 calories only without the fun of any of those calories coming from alcohol. If you're post-pubescent and ordering this drink then you should probably pull your life together and head to the gym. Per the official statement circulated by Starbucks:

Inspired by the nostalgic summer experience of roasting S’mores, this layered Frappuccino starts with marshmallow-infused whipped cream and milk chocolate sauce; adds a creamy blend of graham, coffee, milk, and ice; and is finished off with more mashmallowy whipped cream and a graham cracker crumble.

How tf do you “infuse” whipped cream with marshmallow? No idea. The new flavor is a part of Starbucks' “Happy Hour” where you can try any Frappuccino for half price on May 1-10 from 3-5. So basically this is for every betch-in-training trying to show off to her friends that she likes coffee (read: sugar, milk, and a half cup of coffee) even though she's only 11 years old. You're gonna look, like, SO COOL when you show up to JV field hockey practice with one of these cups in your hand, trust.


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