Remember when we we were embarrassed to read 50 Shades of Grey in public? Or when we thought Fifty Shades of Grey actually turned us on—ok fine, maybe it still does. Well, it’s been six years since the poorly written Twilight fan fiction opened our eyes to the world of BDSM, and while we are still suffering the consequences of the extremely poor movie casting (have you ever seen two people hate each other on camera more that Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan?), we can all be at least a little thankful to the series for forcing us to embrace the existence of sexual fetishes.
I’m no Anastasia Steele—if I were to rank my level of sexual experimentation on a Ben & Jerry’s scale of Vanilla to Spectacular Speculoos Core, I’d be a solid half pint of Peanut Butter Cup. So while submissive fantasies might not be my thing, I totally respect the fact that they might be yours. And you know what—you definitely aren’t alone. Almost everyone has some sort of fetish, and we should all start talking about them more. Because life (and sex) is better with choices. So if you are still feeling self conscious, here are a list of fetishes that are totally common to enjoy.
Why should you keep your performance to yourself? You are fucking good at fucking—show it off. Maybe that means sex in a public place, or maybe you’re Kim Kardashian in the sheets and you just want to press record. Either way, own it, girl—you look good on camera. (Just, you know, make sure you trust the guy and you store any incriminating photos or videos in a double-encrypted app/storage system.)
There is nothing weak about wanting to be told what to do in the bedroom, and there is definitely nothing weak about a man who wants to be dominated. Most days I get tired of making decisions by lunch (do I want a sandwich or sushi…ugh life is hard), so getting strict instructions that will lead to an orgasm and then sleep sounds like a great way to end the day.
It’s like throwing your car keys into a fish bowl, but modern and less creepy ’cause it’s not your parents. You take the betrayal out of sleeping with someone else and there’s no more cheating—just a hot sexual experience for both you and your partner…and some other lucky people.
There is a reason everyone associates handcuffs with sexual fantasy, and it’s not because anyone has any desire to be arrested. Also, if you haven’t heard of Shibari you should check that shit out—it’s like being a sex trapeze artist (double fantasy, amiright?). TBH, I often don’t know what to do with my hands during sex, so tying me up would be super helpful.