Hey Upper East Siders. Gossip Girl may have ended over four years ago (okay we’re fucking old), but Penn Badgley will always be Lonely Boy in our eyes. Dan may have married Serena in the finale, but this weekend he got married in real life. That’s right, Lonely Boy has finally found love. After Blake Lively dumped him and ended up marrying Ryan Reynolds, we feared there was no hope for him, but it seems like everything worked out okay.
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Penn’s wife is the sister of Jessa from Girls, and her name is Domino Kirke. Yes, Domino. Like, Domino, as in the weird stupid game or the shitty pizza place. We’re still very puzzled about how this is a real name, but we swear to god we’re not making it up. She basically looks exactly like her sister Jemima who plays Jessa, which means she obviously wore a casual short wedding dress because she’s too hip to give a fuck, to an annoying extent.
Apparently they got married in a courthouse in Brooklyn, which is like honestly painfully fitting because Dan could never truly hang in the Upper East Side. He would’ve hated a big wedding, so this is the best gift he could possibly receive. No word on whether Serena, Blair, Chuck, or Nate were in attendance, but we have a feeling they didn’t make the minimal invite list. Little Jenny wasn’t there either, probably because she was too busy putting on liquid eyeliner or disappointing her father.
So, Upper East Siders, will Lonely Boy and Little Domino be a match made in heaven? Perhaps. Only time will tell, but we’ll be there the second anything starts to go wrong. That’s all for now. xoxo, Gossip Girl.