In the off chance that you do allow yourself to eat pasta – probably to avoid passing out at the gym again – you want it to be as healthy as fucking possible. However, you also don’t want that shit to be tasteless and boring. You also probably don’t want to deal with truly making any kind of sauce, but, obv, want it to look appealing. WHAT’S A BETCH TO DO?
A betch is to make a “sauce” out of shit that takes no cooking or effort. Also, this pasta reminds us of spring. Do you remember spring? It's that magical time when the sun returns to us and we are no longer forced to wear all things concealing the wrist or ankle for fear of their freezing upon contact with the outside.
- 1 small leek, cleaned of grit (they’re like, dirty)
- Extra virgin olive oil
- Kosher salt and black pepper
- 8 oz fresh fettuccine (yes, use the fucking fresh pasta)
- 2 cups fresh spinach, torn
- 1/2 cup ricotta cheese – you can use the half fat kind, but that is the opposite of the Meditteranean diet
- 1 tsps red wine vinegar
- Crushed red pepper
Heat a grill pan to medium and brush the leek with oil, seasoning with like a pinch of salt and a pinch of pepper. Grill until tender, 5-6 minutes per side. Transfer to a cutting board and cut into bite-size pieces. If you don’t want to fucking grill, then just sauté in a hot skillet until you get some char marks. Also, don’t smoke yourself out of your apartment.
Cook the fettuccine according to package directions or how I fucking told you to back in that fresh pasta post. Reserve ½ cup of the cooking water – then drain the fettuccini and return it to the pot.
Add the leeks, spinach, vinegar, ¼ cup (THAT’S HALF) of the reserved cooking water, about ½ tsp of salt, and a few grinds of fresh cracked black pepper to the fettuccine and toss to combine. Add the rest of the cooking liquid ONLY if the pasta seems dry. Serve topped with the ricotta and the red pepper. Serves two, so, like, you’ll either have leftovers or a very satisfied signif. other who will probs totally give you a massage and buy you more wine.