You are the most beautiful waste of my time I have ever encountered.
You are a perfect fantasy world, one where I can aggregate all of my hopes and my dreams with just a few clicks. I know that a board is not real life, but somehow I really don’t care.
Pinterest, you let me be exactly who I want to be. Dressed in the chicest clothes, living in an apartment decorated with the most stunningly designed furniture, and planning the most perfect and over-the-top wedding – even if I’m, ahem, currently “just talking” to a few different suitors.
You exist as a window into the most beautiful and perfectly curated version of my future and I love you for that. It will look like that someday, right? Right? RIGHT?
I just need to address one little issue with you while we’re having this heart-to-heart.
What the fuck is up with all of your dessert recipes? Are you not aware that I would cease to fit into all of the clothes (and probably shoes) you display if I was to bend the daily fucking cravings you so inconsiderately trigger? Get some kind of filter option for your feed, you idiot. What is this? A center for nicegirls?
Don’t worry babe, I still love you. Nobody’s perfect, even if their life on Pinterest might be.
But seriously, my apartment would be so much uglier without your “coffee table-styling” tips, my kale intake would be so much more boring without your recipes, and I totally would not know how to do a side braid in my hair. For these all-important life skills, you’ll always be in my heart.
Keep doing you, Pinterest.