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Kim Kardashian's CBD Baby Shower Is Too Much

In case you’d forgotten, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are expecting another baby. A lot has happened since the initial announcement of baby number four, but somewhere in the world, their surrogate is getting close to delivering. There’s another boy on the way soon, and over the weekend, Kim had a baby shower for all her famous friends. Unlike recent Kardashian party themes like Avengers and Giant Inflatable of Stormi’s HeadKim decided to go with more of a chill vibe, but of course it was still extra AF. And by that, I mean that she had a CBD and meditation-themed baby shower. Ugh.

In keeping with the Kanye’s recent church vibes and Kim’s outfits that look like the world’s bougiest yoga clothes, Kim focused the whole shower around ~wellness~, whatever that means. From the photos, it looked like they were all on a driveway in the middle of a forest, but it was probably just the backyard of one of Kim’s mansions. With everyone’s yoga mats arranged around some bizarre-looking metal bowls, this really looks like a rich person’s MLM party. It’s like if that sad girl from your high school who’s shilling essential oils was rich.

The main theme of the day was CBD, and guests got to make their own CBD-infused body oils, bath salts, and flower arrangements. Until this moment, I didn’t realize that CBD flower arrangements were a thing, but truly nothing surprises me anymore. CBD is used for tons of products, and people believe all kinds of ridiculous things about CBD and its properties. In addition to the DIY portion of the afternoon, guest also enjoyed a “sound bath” while relaxing on yoga mats. I’m not going to bother Googling what a sound bath is, because I don’t need to be angry about anything today.

The guests also guessed the new baby’s name on a whiteboard, which is really the only thing normal that happened at this baby shower. There was one suggestion that Kim liked enough to put on her Instagram: Harut. It’s Armenian for “He Has Risen,” which seems like the exact kind of name that Kim and Kanye would pick for their child. He’s not even born yet, and the Jesus comparisons are already rolling in!

Guests at the baby shower included Kourtney Kardashian, Larsa Pippen, and Chrissy Teigen. I’d like to think that Chrissy was rolling her eyes throughout the sound bath, but she probably took home a CBD flower arrangement so she didn’t look rude. We still don’t know exactly when Kim Kardashian’s new baby is due, but the due date probably isn’t far off. I’ll be anxiously waiting to see if Kim goes with Harut, or something else equally pretentious.

Images: @larsapippen, @kimkardashian (2) / Instagram

Dylan Hafer
Dylan Hafer has watched over 1000 episodes of Real Housewives because he has his priorities in order. Follow him on Instagram @dylanhafer and Twitter @thedylanhafer for all the memes you could ever want.