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5 Ways To Kill Sugar Cravings In Time For Valentine's Day

Cutting back on sugar is one of those healthy promises we make every New Year’s but never actually keep. We didn’t make it through Dry January, we haven’t been getting enough sleep to be properly functioning human beings, and we still eat all the fucking sugar.

With Valentine’s Day approaching and the inevitable sugar rush that comes along with it, let’s all vow to lay off the sweets before your doorman starts showering you with Hersey’s Kisses every time you walk through the door. We did some research to get started and we want to share what we found. Here are some tips to help kill your sugar cravings:

1. Have A Real Breakfast

We have some news for you: Iced coffee is not breakfast. Half of a Kind Bar is not breakfast. A stick of gum and a Diet Snapple is not breakfast. It’s been proven time and time again that by eating a filling breakfast of protein, fats, and fiber, you’ll be less likely to have sugar cravings throughout the day.  Plus, by starting your day off feeling satisfied, you’ll be less likely to get ravinous at around 3pm and devour the entire jar of Peanut M&M’s sitting on your coworker Debra’s desk.

2. Eat Fermented Foods

Most people don’t realize your gut health has a huge effect on your sugar cravings. By eating fermented foods with good bacteria like kefir, sauerkraut, kimchi, and pickles, the live cultures will help manage any imbalances in your gut and will reduce sugar cravings. People might look at you like you’re a freak and/or Snooki, but if snacking on kimchi keeps us skinny, we’ll start buying this shit in bulk.

3. Skip The Splenda

…and all other artificial sweeteners. It’s pretty enticing to just dump a shit ton of Splenda in everything that tastes bland and healthy, but it turns out there’s a huge downside to calorie-free sweeteners: They make you crave the real shit. There’s a reason you want to inhale a 12-pack of Krispy Kreme donuts after chugging a Diet Coke, and it’s not just because you lack self-control. It’s because you’re drinking 12 ounces of fake sugar that makes you want real sugar. Start cutting down on sweeteners and you’ll crave them less and less over time.

4. Take L-Glutamine Supplements

Betches and L-Glutamine supplements are a better match than Chrissy Teigen and John Legend. These pills complete us, and we’re not getting paid by some supplement company to preach for them like a sketchy Skinny Tea Instagram ad. L-Glutamine has amazing health benefits for your body, and the two main ones are fighting sugar cravings and controlling your gut health and metabolism. Just don’t start posting “It works!” Facebook statuses. 

5. Go The Fuck To Sleep

It seems like sleep is pretty much the answer to all of our problems, and it’s not just because we prefer to nap than to deal with real life shit. It’s been scientifically proven that getting more sleep allows your body to crave healthier foods, while getting less sleep makes your body crave fattening, sugary snacks. Do you think Gwyneth Paltrow gets that glowing skin from binge-watching Stranger Things until 4am? No. And it’s probably not from putting rocks up her vagina either, but that’s a different story. The point is, make sleep a priority (as if we have to tell you twice). It’s called beauty rest for a reason.