Green Tea Cocktails: For the Betch Who Blacks Outs After Yoga

It’s super hard sometimes being healthy – especially when it comes to making the right choice in draaaanks. Like, we know that beer is fattening, bloaty, and for beer pong only (unless you’re a crunchy hipster betch sippin’ on IPAs gag), so most of us are forced to order martinis or vodka sodas when out and about.

If you’re at home hosting a bitchin party, however, OR presented with the opportunity to play bartender, you can let your creative (alcoholic) juices flow. We give you the green tea cocktail.

For anyone who doesn’t know (and honestly you SHOULD know), green tea is super great for speeding up your metabolism and making you skinny. Add in some alcohol and you have the makings of a pretty solid night.


  • ½ cup strong green tea – make with like, 2-3 bags instead of one. You want it to ACTUALLY taste like something
  • ¼ cup gin – I’d go the Tanqueray route if I were you
  • 1 tbsp honey or agave nectar … you can also make a ginger simple syrup by boiling 1 cup of water with 1 cup of sugar and a peeled 2-inch piece of fresh ginger until everything is combined
  • Juice of 1 lime – yes it needs to be fucking fresh
  • Champagne – if you don’t have this on hand I just can’t with you

In a tall glass, combine the green tea, gin, lime juice, and agave nectar/honey/simple syrup. Stir everything to combine. Pour the mixture into two champagne glasses and top off with champagne and a sprig of fresh mint if you want. Serve. Look how classy you are. You don’t eat your calories – you drink them.


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