Betchy NY Governor Cuomo Wants You To Get Legally Wasted In Movie Theaters

Everyone on the entire planet knows New York is betchy af as far as states go. Besides NYC being a betch’s playground, earlier this year a brunch bill was passed so we could start drinking as soon as we wake up on Sundays and last week they passed legislation that makes sure New Yorkers have access to copay-less birth control, and now Governor Cuomo is at it again. Apparently, New York’s badass governor is asking the State Liquor Authority (yo, you hiring?) to give all of the state’s movie theaters the ability to serve beer and wine. Because who wants to go see La La Land sober? Fucking nobody.

It's Not Fun To Be Sober

The idea comes from the fact that movie theater sales are down from shit like online streaming and OnDemand because nobody wants to pay 15 fucking dollars to watch a damn movie in public. Cuomo knows us all too well and thinks we’ll start going back to the movies if there’s booze involved. Or maybe he’s just sick of having to sneak a flask into the theater, seeing as that’s probs frowned upon when you’re the governor of v important state. Idk. Either way, we’re all pulling for this shit to go through because everything is better with a drink.