The Best Expensive Beauty Serums And Their Cheap Alternatives

Everytime I go into the wide interwebs, some other beauty blogger is telling me to smear oil or a fancy serum on my face. Look, I already have a strict skin care regimen and am v afraid of breaking out, so the idea of patting on literal oil is a lil frightening.

However, I will admit that there are quite a few serums and oils out there that totally work. The problem is that they’re weighing in at more than I care to afford (esp. when I need to spend money on important shit like Zara’s new Fall collection, mmkay?). We’ve rounded up the pricey shit that people like Gwyneth Paltrow slides on her face (I assume when she isn’t steaming her snatch) and the cheaper alternatives that, SHOCKER, work just as well.

Pricey Shiiiiit: Rodin Olio Lusso

Described as “rich and deluxe,” this serum made from what I assume are nearly extinct plants and animals will make you feel extra if you use it. It helps with dry skin and wrinkles, so you can look 25 for another few years. The scariest part of this shit is that a TEENY TINY BOTTLE will set you back $170. This better fix my dry skin, help me drop 20 pounds, and cook dinner for me, too.

Rodin Olio Lusso

For Your Cheap Ass: Botanics Hydration Burst with Clary Sage Light Serum

If you need a serum to get your dry, crusty skin to snap back into action, this shit it for you. It’s better for sensitive skin, too, than some of the heavier alternatives. The best part is the price tag—pick this shit up at Target for under $15.

Botanics Hydration Burst with Clary Sage Light Serum

Pricey Shiiiiit: de Mamiel Winter Facial Oil

For the low low price of $114, you can experience this “exquisite seasonal oil”—available four times a year—you know, for all the seaaaasons. The winter one has tons of essential oils, fruit and plant extracts, and all kinds of shit to “renew your spirit.” Like I said before, for that fucking price, it better come with a fur coat made of something exotic and extinct.

de Mamiel Winter Facial Oil

For Your Cheap Ass: Clinique Acne Solutions Acne + Line Correcting Serum

See, when you aren’t dishing out big bucks, you get products that straight-up call you out for having a few zits. Rude. However, at only about $45, I’ll take that side of shame with my serum. This shit is oil free, but the serum made from salicylic acid and other awesome pimple-popping meds helps to not just battle your face’s bumps, but also wrinkles. Win.

Clinique Acne Solutions Acne + Line Correcting Serum

Pricey Shiiiiit: Kypris Beauty Elixir I-1000 Roses

Described as “magic” for dull, tired, and dry skin, this shit has the “essential oil of 1000 organic and biodynamic Bulgarian roses.” I had no idea literally anything in Bulgaria was that valuable. Relax, I’m kidding. So with the expensive flowers also comes black raspberry and pomegranate seed extracts, antioxidants, and LOTS of vitamin C—which we all know is crack for your skin. This luxurious shit is the most expensive on our list at $225.

KYPRIS Beauty Elixir 1000 Roses

For Your Cheap Ass: John Masters Organics Vitamin C Anti-Aging Face Serum

If you’re familiar with John Masters, you know he makes a mean sea salt spray for your hair (yaaaaas!). The natural beauty carries into this serum, which, with its tons of vitamin C and nourishing antioxidants, helps chill out the wrinkles that may be starting AND add some brightness. For $26, I’ll take what I can get.