Chimichurri, For All Your Meaty Needs

Having a basic knowledge of toppings and sauces may seem useless – especially for a betch who only throws back vodka sodas and eats cucumbers with the occasional cube of cheese.

But like if you’re looking to impress company or just can’t stomach one more goddamn dried out piece of steak/chicken/tofu, you should have a basic knowledge of a basic sauce to make your meal not so basic. See what I did there?

Unlike your butter-based or cream-of-fat sauces, a chimichurri serves as a delicious vehicle for tons of herbs and spices without packing on the calories. Pretty much, chimichurri is a betch’s best friend. If you don’t know what chimichurri is, bless. It’s basically a green sauce used for grilled meat and contains parsley or cilantro, garlic, oil, oregano, and vinegar. Chimichurri is to Argentina what pesto is to Italy. Boom.


  • 1 cup firmly packed fresh flat-leaf parsley
  • 4 garlic cloves
  • 2 tbsps fresh oregano (yes, fresh)
  • ½ cup extra virgin olive oil
  • 2 tbsp red wine vinegar
  • 1 tsp sea salt or kosher salt
  • ¼ tsp freshly cracked black pepper
  • ¼ tsp red pepper flakes

Get out your mini food processor and process the parsley, garlic, and oregano. Remove from the processor and stir in the remaining ingredients. Fucking done. Use as a marinade or on grilled meat.

You can also sub in fresh cilantro for the parsley (or go half and half parsley and cilantro) – just depends on your preference. Kthxbai!


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