Even thinking about acne makes me break out, but someone’s gotta be the lifesaver and tell us WTF is causing this shit and how to get rid of it for once and for all. Naturally, that person will be me *hair flips dramatically.* I hate acne just as much as… literally every person on Earth who’s ever gotten a pimple. It’s literally the worst buzzkill if you’re really feelin’ yourself on Snapchat and it’s also like, the biggest turnoff for anyone, ever. Most of us have been personally victimized by a fugly zit (or several) at some point, and you’d think that shit would stop after high school but you’d be wrong. So, so very wrong. It’s bad enough to get red bumps on your face but then there’s chestne and bacne that we have to fucking worry about, too. Surprisingly, where your acne appears on your body says a lot about your unhealthy lifestyle and what’s triggering those breakouts. So, here’s what those triggers probs are and how to avoid them. I promise, I won’t make your face smell like a foot.
If You Have Acne On Your Hairline…
You Should Chill With Wearing Hats And Using Dry Shampoo
Any acne here is more often than not connected to your hair or your head (duh)—what goes into your hair, what you put on your head…etc. Avoid hairspray, oil-based products, and any shampoo or conditioner that contains sulfates. Unfortunately, our BFF dry shampoo can sometimes harm our hair if we depend on it too much (and we do). By prolonging your next hair wash, you’re adding to the oily buildup, which in turn clogs pores, makes you break out, the whole nine yards. Keep your hair wash schedule frequent and consistent. Do you think you’re cute wearing that baseball cap or workout headband? You’ll want to think twice about putting it on if you can’t remember the last time you washed it. It has a shit ton of nasty af sweat, basically suffocates your hairline, and hellooo, hat hair!!! If you insist, make sure to wash hair accessories frequently or like, just wash your hair ASAP.
^^^No, we fucking CARE.
If You Have Acne In Your T-Zone…
Blame It On Where You Live
I’m looking at you, New Yorkers and Californians. Living in the world’s best cities is great and all, but not only does it rob you of every penny to your name, it also wreaks havoc on your face. All that traffic, literal garbage, and *gags* public transportation smoke is fucking disgusting. The smallest of dirt, gas, or pollution particles flock to your T-Zone as soon as you step outside. Your basic face wash isn’t going to do the trick, so you’ll need a cleansing sponge like the Boscia Konjac Cleansing Sponge With Complexion Clearing Clay to get the filth off in areas your hands can’t. Keep in mind scorching summers and dry winters play a factor, too. For those of you down south, keep away from oil-based cleansers (fucking obviously) and for those who suffer from arctic temps, use a v hydrating cleanser such as the Olehenriksen The Clean Truth Foaming Cleanser which retains moisture and cleanses your pores at the same damn time.
If You Have Acne On Your Cheeks…
You Don’t Clean Things That Touch Your Face 24/7 As Often As You Should
Tsk, tsk. Things that touch your face constantly, even if you don’t realize it, are fucking up your skin big time. This includes your phone, so like, all those times you answer the phone with a full contour on but forget to wipe the screen. Putting this shit back on your face over and over again 1) sounds gross, and it is, and 2) makes you breakout like cray cray so, uh, wipe off your phone screen every time. In case you didn’t know, you kinda have to wash your makeup brushes pretty fucking often, too. If you don’t, you’re essentially putting dirt, oil, and sooo much bacteria back on your face. Repeatedly. I literally already went over how to actually clean your makeup brushes so your skin doesn’t hate you, so here you go.
If You Have Acne On Your Jawline or Chin…
You’re Probs Stressed The F Out Or Drinking Too Much Cranberry Juice Cocktail
Surprise, surprise. Stress causes acne. I can’t tell you to just stop being stressed because life doesn’t really work that way and tbh, we’re all gonna be stressed af until the day we die. What I can say is, try being ~zen~ by meditating more often, putting that yoga mat to use, and just namaste, betch. Whatever you do, do not touch those pesky zits staring back at you. It’s a trap, I tell you. If your weekly diet consists of pasta, vodka cranberries, and iced coffees served light and sweet (god pls grant me the courage to change my ways), these sugary carbonated devils foods will attack your mouth area. Eliminate at least one calorie-loaded food you eat on a regular basis to unclog your pores and prevent oil. A bunch of red bumps around your mouth isn’t a good look, GF.
If You Have Acne On Your Chest…
Stop Putting Makeup On Your Boobs And Wash Your Sports Bra
This tends to be frequent in the warmer months, thanks to the combo of humidity and tight clothing. Whether you’re laying out tanning or day drinking in a deep V-neck bodysuit, make sure to use a super lightweight sunscreen like Shiseido Urban Environment UV Protection Cream Broad Spectrum SPF 40 For Face/Body so you stay protected and moisturized without aggravating sensitive skin. Also, avoid clogging your pores with layers of makeup on your chest, even if you have a small breakout. You’ll actually make it worse, so just don’t do it, promise? If you do this thing called like, cardio, wearing a sports bra alone clogs your pores and produces bacteria on your chest. When you’re done with your workout, make sure to shower immediately to get all that shit off and throw your bra in the hamper for a wash. And then actually wash it.
If You Have Acne On Your Back…
Your Bag Sucks And You Should Wash Your Bed Sheets
Bacne is the literal fucking worst. It really is your typical selfish, back-stabbing, slut-face, hoe bag of a thing that exists and no, there is not much more to it. Like most triggers (take a hint), wearing tight clothing or something that constantly rubs your back causes skin irritation which—ding, ding, ding!!!—causes acne. This includes lame backpacks or heavy shoulder straps. For starters, we actually found lightweight backpacks that won’t cause back sweat. Although it’s nearly impossible unless you’re a yogi, washing your back will help a lot. Find a nice person exfoliating brush like the Ecotools Bristle Back Brush to help you reach hard-to-get places. Laying back in a pile of oil and dirt will obvs defeat the purpose of that, though so, be sure that you’re washing your bed sheets regularly to avoid contact with buildup on your back.
