This week’s Betches of the Week are people you feel like are your best friends, only you’ve never actually met them before. I could do my cute little “No, it’s not ____, it’s _____” thing, but this time around I’m going to leave the humor to the BOTW: it’s the cast of Trainwreck.
In case you haven’t been on the grid for the past few weeks, Trainwreck is Universal Studio’s new movie starring Amy Schumer, the HBIC, and a whole slew of betchy co-stars who we’ll get to in just a sec.
Despite what you’re thinking, Trainwreck was not actually written about your life by a hidden camera crew spying on you for the past six months (confusing, I know) but like, it might as well have been. Brief rundown: Trainwreck is about Amy (played by Amy Schumer, total spoil alert) who is basically your BSCB: she’s like, never heard of #8 not fucking bros, blacks out on the reg, you know the usual. But when Amy meets sports doctor Aaron Conners (played by Bill Hader) when she is assigned to profile him, she just might change her slutty ways.
Trainwreck is going to be your fave movie of the summer, especially if dinosaurs and animation really aren’t your thing. A rundown of the betch-studded cast includes:
Amy Schumer: Former Betch of the Week and your spirit animal, Amy Schumer is hilarious, brilliant, and has literally built a career on calling SAB’s out on their bullshit.
Bill Hader: He plays Amy’s love interest in Trainwreck (spoiler alert), but you probably know him as your favorite New York club promoter, Stefon.
Lebron James: Lebron plays himself in this movie and there’s literally nothing betchier than getting paid to go about your regular business, on film.
Tilda Swinton: You probably know her as the White Witch from the Narnia movies, who basically played the physical manifestation of your cold, unfeeling heart. She plays Amy’s boss in Trainwreck so I expect nothing short of Miranda Priestly 2.0.
Go see Trainwreck to watch these betches on-screen, plus surprise cameos!