A Strongly Worded Letter To Promposals

Dear Promposal Generation,

It’s about time we address the fact that you kids have it made. Back when I was in high school we had to text our friends using T9 on our Pink Razors under the desk, and now you’re sending Snapchat nudes and using iPads in class. But with great rewards come great responsibilities, and our youth have a huge burden to bear in the age of do it for the story (or number of Instagram likes.)

We’re accusing younger generations (and probably our own) of having a hook up culture with no strings attached, but they’ve also managed to take courtship to the next level when it comes to things such as asking someone to prom. Social media is flooded with pictures and stories of high schoolers using banners, posters, scavenger hunts, riddles, clues, candle filled rooms, rose petal scattered living rooms and other theatrical measures to pop the question: will you go to prom with me? In reality, we can all thank the stars of the original Laguna Beach for creating the expectation of walking outside to a pool full of goldfish with a sign that reads With all the fish in the sea, will you go to prom with me?!

Maybe this has always been a thing and it’s just becoming more public and competitive in the age of social media, or maybe this younger generations truly are try hards. All I know is this: you’ve now set the bar WAY too high for the years to come. If you’re willing to make posters and scavenger hunts and overly planned schemes to ask a girl to spend six hours with you at a chaperoned dance while sneaking nips in the bathroom, you’ll be hard pressed when it comes time to ask for a girls hand in marriage. You’ll need to pull out all the stops with horse drawn carriages, sky writing planes, and jumbotrons to woo her. Try a nice TBT to a simpler time: Will you go to prom with me? Check Yes, No or Who the fuck are you.


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