Every four years, we get the opportunity to turn on the Winter Olympics, watch about three seconds of someone skiing, and then get bored and change the channel to a random RHONY rerun. Luckily for us, the hot Olympians of Team USA make watching slightly more enjoyable considering they’re v good-looking. In case you haven’t been stalking their Instagrams already, here are the 8 hottest athletes on Team USA this year:
Hot Olympian #1: Gus Kenworthy
Gus Kenworthy is a 26-year-old pro skier who already has over five silver medals in his pocket. Can you please do less? He’s also literally so good-looking, so I guess some people really do have it all. He’s also gay which is a bummer for the straight women out there, but like, I’ll still be watching him. And stalking his Instagram.
Hot Olympian #2: David Chodounsky
David is an alpine skier from Colorado and he’s been on the US team for over eight years. He went to Dartmouth and won the NCAA slalom title when he was just a freshman, sooo let’s assume he didn’t have any *social* trouble. I’m a fan.
Hot Olympian #3: Hakeem Abdul-Saboor
I honestly never even knew bobsledding was a real Olympic sport beyond Cool Runnings, but now it’s kinda my fav one. Hakeem Abdul- Saboor (AKA @has_fitness on Insta) is literally so hot and the videos he posts of his gym sessions are literally mind-blowing. I mean, who knew you had to be jacked under all those layers?
Hot Olympian #4: Tim Burke
Great views @SkiWhiteface after a hard bounding session! pic.twitter.com/klOeXILvAI
— Tim Burke (@tb_burke) August 8, 2016
Tim Burke is a biathlete, so yes he has many talents. Before 2017, he was one of only two men in the US to have won a biathlon medal at the world championship. He’s already broken a ton of records and he’s only in his 30’s. Plus, he’s married to another biathlete, Andrea Henkel, and the two of them combined have more world cup medals than the average human will ever see.
Hot Olympian #5: Joey Mantia
This guy makes long track speedskating look good, even though he has to wear those tragic goggles when competing. Joey Mantia has literally been sponsored by every big company, from Under Armour to Comcast. He’s obviously playing his cards right. He also owns a cafe in Utah. Talk about a diverse resume.
Hot Olympian #6: Jordan Greenway
UM, apparently this guy is 20 years old so this may be creepy, but like, he’s 6 foot 5 and weighs 230 pounds, so he’s killing it. Aside from his good looks, it’s beyond impressive that he’s on the Olympic ice hockey team at this age. Like, my biggest accomplishment at 20 years old was getting into some campus bar without getting carded.
Hot Olympian #7: Jayson Terdiman
This guy is a luge athlete, which is that sport that looks like grown men are sliding down the mountain on a sled like they’re on some water slide at Atlantis. Turns out it’s actually a really intense sport and this guy is one of the best in the world. It’s basically all about controlled upper body strength, so there’s no question he’s jacked.
Hot Olympian #8: Jake Pates
Shaun White has been known as the hot snowboarder for some time now, but honestly, Jake Pates may take his place this year. Jake is from Colorado, but he kinda looks like the surfing type that lives in Malibu and has never been to New York. He made the US Rookie team in 2014 and he’s been killing it ever since. Plus, his Instagram bio says “FAM FIRST,” so like, he’s husband material for sure.
Also, Jake doesn’t have a sexual harassment scandal brewing so like…there’s also that.