Real World Roundup: Science Says Stop Working So Hard Floser

Lindsay Lohan is having a tough week. It's not enough that shes been mistaken for a 65 year old but now she's being rejected by an old ass photographer. It seems Lindz is in a battle with herself over just how big of a freak she can date after coming out of her lez phase. At least Wilmer Valderama was like, young. Read article

Apparently the color pink, like the limit, does not exist. We don't give a shit about science so whether it exists or not we're here to tell you, we just want our pink shirt back! Read article

Here you have it. Working hard = sadness and loneliness. Tanning by the pool = happy lives. As if we needed more of a reason to #36 not do work. Seriously though, stop trying so hard, you're going to die mis anyway. Read article


lennon“OMG how skinny do my arms look in this tank!?”


Miley Cyrus starts smoking pot, stops making any fucking sense. Click here for some Twitter genius.

John Lennon became bulimic after taking “I am the Walrus” to be a personal attack on his figure'oh and after he heard the original unedited version of “We All Live In a Yellow Submarine”except John because he's too fucking fat.” Read article

In this week's edition of why Wall Street investment bankers are fucking crazy, an employee at Morgan Stanley stabs his cab driver for overcharging him for his ride home. Talk about a temper, this is why we don't date guys who carry pen knives, or guys who don't live in the city. Read article

Attention potential interns! Get excited to be #5 skinny this summer! Read this and find out why.

Sorry poor people, your taste buds just naturally suck. Now go back to your fucking Yellowtail. Read article

kardash“We'll discuss this in therapy”


Kendall Jenner announced as newest Rhodes scholar! Just kidding, obvi she's “not really thinking about college right now.” After a casual Shining-inspired photo shoot with her sister, Kendall is quoted as saying, “If my career, like, blows up and gets really big, modeling is what I would do.” Thus, she's gracing this week's installment of “I”m talentless but OMG my mom is Kris Jenner!” Read article

Tim Tebow passes on Dancing with the Stars and The Bachelor so he can have more time to make-out with God. Read article

Girl sues college after being pissed off that her

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