It’s easy to say that The Bachelor producers would do absolutely anything for ratings, especially if you’ve seen Unreal or watched any episode that’s aired over the last 15 years. The show is notorious for manipulating contestants into fighting each other, falling in love with a wet blanket and participating in five seasons of Paradise before realizing the only thing they’ve gained is Twitter trolls and some psychological damage. But that would be unfair to the producers, who clearly have souls and moral boundaries that they most likely wouldn’t cross in order to make a profit. Here are the ten things they probably wouldn’t do for ratings:
1. Allow Chad To Murder Evan
Just because they’re comfortable pumping Chad with steroids to fuel his rage and jeopardize the safety of 95-pound Evan doesn’t mean these producers would actually allow Chad to end Evan’s life. That would be extremely unconscionable for obvious reasons.
2. Publicly Broadcast Evan’s Funeral As A Bachelor Event
But hypothetically speaking, if Evan were to get killed (by no fault of the producers, of course), they certainly wouldn’t broadcast a tacky and insensitive live funeral event in which we catch up with couples from previous seasons.
3. Place Weapons Around The Mansion
And even if the funeral event turned out to be a smash hit and the most-watched program in Bachelor history, under no circumstances would these producers encourage more violence among the contestants, since this show is about one thing only: finding love.
4. Give Corinne Bath Salts
Of course the producers love when Corinne lets her personality shine, but they wouldn’t go so far as to intentionally give her bath salts in the hopes that she has a bad trip while on a group date. That would be unethical and insane.
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5. Give Corrine Bath Salts In Combination With A Lot Of Other Illegal Drugs
Corinne isn’t some paid FDA experiment intended for testing the effects of harmful substances on humans. Where would you even get that idea?
6. Brand Everyone’s Forehead With The Number Of Times They’ve Had Sex
The Bachelor might have an obsessive interest in calling out virgins and slut-shaming girls who have sex, but the decision to reveal that information is entirely up to the contestants, a fact that the producers of the show deeply respect.
7. Contractually Bind Couples To Stay Together Indefinitely
When a season ends, the winners of the show should be able to move on with their lives and live in peace. The producers would never force an unhappy couple to stay together, which is just further proof that JoJo Fletcher is the happiest she’s ever been.
8. Brainwash Chris Harrison Into Never Leaving
Speaking of free will, the producers would obviously allow beloved host Chris Harrison to leave at any point. Make no mistake that Chris wants to be there and is operating with his full mental faculties.
9. Stalk Contestants’ Exes To Make Them Appear On The Show
It’s not strange at all that previous partners appear out of nowhere to cause controversy with people they haven’t spoken to in years. Even if the producers did play a role in finding them, it’s not very probable that they’d hide in their bushes for days at a time waiting for a chance to talk to them.
10. Light The Entire Mansion On Fire
A stunt like this would not only be destructive, but highly dangerous for everyone involved. We can therefore say with almost complete certainty that this is not how the producers are planning to end the final season. They’re clearly much better than that.